bbjnay

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

OMG...Paul and I went to our favorite Mexican resturant last night adn I said do you want to try sitting in a booth and he said yeah.  We both fit and had room to spare.  It is so thrilling to discover "new" things that you can now do sa the weight comes off. The next challange is the dreaded MOVIE THEATER SEAT. 

Did you feel teh Earth shake this morning?  You should have felt it the way I was JUMPING & DANCING around.  The scales moved...297.  It feels good.  Just 57 more pounds and I will be at my surgeons predicted weight for me.  I have to prove him wrong.

The scales are still sitting at 300.  I have jumped on them, creeped up on them, moved them from place to place on the floor and the darn thing will not go under the 300 mark.  It is sooo frustrating. I am dissappointed in myself because I would have like to have had 200 pounds off by my anniversary date.

WhooHooo....300 pounds, I can't beleive it, just more pound and I am under 300.  I am beside myself - I now weigh less then Paul. You know it is really hard to accept when you weigh more then your husband.  I just want to feel and be normal, I want to wake up every morning knowing that I can do anything I want.  That I no longer have a super morbid obese body to carry around and keep me from LIFE.  I want to experience all the things I have missed out on.  That's what will make me happy, to be free to move, jump, run, walk, just to be mobile without pain.

OH MY GOD.....I did it - down 162 pounds!!!!!!!!!*happy dance*.  I feel so good.  I wanted to hit the 160 mark so bad.  I really want to be down 200 pounds by my 1 year anniversary (12/11/02).  Gosh, I still remember what it was like before surgery, I can't discribe the pain and misery it was.  I remember that I couldn't even work an 8 hour day and I even have a sit down job.  Paul is down to 320, that's 95 pounds for him.  Why do men lose weight so much faster then women?

Guess what??? My feet are normal.  Could it be that after being puffed for 4 solid years, they are now normal.  My ankles are still swollen but I bet it won't be long until they are normal again.  Got on the scales this morning and down another 2 pounds.  Sooo close.  That's 158 down and 2 to go and then I will have set my next goal.  I will feel so much happier when I have hit the 160 pound mark.  It is only natural that I obcess about the "numbers".  That is what my life has been about.  All the diets I ever attempted, were won or lost by the number on the scale.  I don't know how to be any other way.  The only difference this time on obcessing about the numbers is that they don't go higher.  They don't fluctuate the opposite way, no need to panic, give up and start eating everything in sight. Thank God, for not having a stomach to accommodate a binge.  I know many have a hard time seeing themselves in their new bodies, not me.  I remember the pain and misery that body gave me.  If the doctor is right and I can only get down to 240 pounds, that would mean I only have 74 pounds to go.  Of course I would rather get to 200.

9/3 - Paul had his secondy endoscopy and it was closed to 10, the doctor dilated it to 17 this time. Paul has lost 73 pounds in 2 1/2 months....Good for him.
9/4 - It's  hard to believe I am almost 9 months post-op and down 151 pounds.
9/9 - I found a couple of pictures of me from when I lost weight, the one picture I was 157 pounds in the spring of 1974, the second was when I got married in June 1975.  I put them in the front of my Journey book.  I glued ribbon around the pictures to make frames and then I printed the words, "My Journey back to the 70'S".  It looks really cool. There's probably a lot of people that haven't started a picture journal of their progress but it is enlighting.  A person can clearly see their success.
9/16 - 9 month checkup today.  I was really pleased to find out that my scales are right.  I now weigh 318 pounds. Paul has lost 81 pounds in 3 months.  He was upset that his total wasn't more

I am crying tears of JOY this morning.  My BMI is 56.9, I have come so far. To think that my BMI was 83.6 when I started.  God has been so good to me.
He kept my Sane through the struggle to get approval
He was there while I waited for my surgery day.
He walked by my side to the pre-op room.
He gave me peace, joy and calm on the trip to the OR
I give him the Praise for my successful surgery, easy recover, and the blessed peace of knowing I will succeed. God has granted me a second chance to have a happy fulfilling life.  No one knows what their future may hold, but knowing that GOD is in control, means that all is well.

8/5 - My scales say I have now lost 140 pounds.  We went to my brothers house Saturday to swim. It has been a couple of years and it was great. It was so much easier to exercise in the water. Getting out was a little tough, thought I would break his ladder.
8/21 -  WhoooHooo...Happy dance...*smile*.  Life is good. I am thrilled that I am now under 330 pounds. I haven't been at this weight since 1996 when I got out of the hospital I was 340 pounds.  Life just gets better and better.  Paul is down 61 pounds at 2 months out. I feel happier then I have been in a long time.
8/26 -  My family reunion was Sunday and I was disappointed at the lack of interest shown for my weight loss.  It's as if no one really cared. It was interesting to see how many of my cousins are now putting on the weight, maybe that's why they all ignored my loss.  I am no longer the only one that's fat.  Next year will be better, I will be at goal and they will not recognize me.

I'm feeling a little depressed this week. Why you ask? Because I have not lost any more weight.  I know it sounds selfish considering how much I have lost so far.  The thing is I have so much more to lose then you.  I am impatient, I want to get it off now.  Maybe it would be theraputic if I listed all the things that I can now do or things that make life better now that I have lost 133 pounds
I can put on my own shoes
I can tie my shoes
I can clip my toe nails
I can wipe my butt ( I know it's a gross listing...life sometimes is)
I can sit in chairs without arms!!!!
I have only a little pain in my knees
I am walking without limping
I can get in and out of my car without it being painful
I can shop for hours
I can be on my feet for long periods without my back hurting
I can bend over without feeling like I am going to puke
I'm hardly ever out of breath
I can walk 10 times faster
I can take a shower w/o getting out of breath & my back hurting
I can work a fullday
I can clean the house
I can take out the garbage
I can park anywhere and walk across the parking lot
I can lift my foot up and take off my socks
I can look at myself in the full length mirror & like what I see
I can weigh on the doctors scales
The most important thing is that I can now go anywhere by myself. the fear is gone.