cathymc911
MAY 16TH, 2007
May 16, 2007
Today is much better. My husband and I had a nice talk and we worked it out!
It is stress on both of us. It is like bringing your first baby home for the first time. I brought my new tummy home for the first time. My head and body need to learn to adjust along with the rest of us.
I am having some hunger pains today, not that intense. I seem to still think about food. I wish I didn't .I took a walk today,did some shopping, and choirs. Physically I am doing very well. I am looking forward to my therapy appointment tomorrow.
I have a 95% chance of having adult ADD. If I do they will get me on the proper medication. I think this will help me soo much.
I am still getting in my protein and water. I have been drinking green tea and splenda that seems to help. I have some nausea first thing in the morning. I learned for RNY support group DR. that it is possibly the saliva and mucus in my stomach from sleeping. It goes away soon as I get water in me...
It is stress on both of us. It is like bringing your first baby home for the first time. I brought my new tummy home for the first time. My head and body need to learn to adjust along with the rest of us.
I am having some hunger pains today, not that intense. I seem to still think about food. I wish I didn't .I took a walk today,did some shopping, and choirs. Physically I am doing very well. I am looking forward to my therapy appointment tomorrow.
I have a 95% chance of having adult ADD. If I do they will get me on the proper medication. I think this will help me soo much.
I am still getting in my protein and water. I have been drinking green tea and splenda that seems to help. I have some nausea first thing in the morning. I learned for RNY support group DR. that it is possibly the saliva and mucus in my stomach from sleeping. It goes away soon as I get water in me...
MAY 15TH, 2007
May 15, 2007
Today has been really hard on me. I am hungry. There is food all around me. My husband has been acting out of character for the past three days. Too be honest He has been a real A-Hole! I am only five days post-op. I am vacuuming,feeding the kids,picking up around the house. He has to do alot with the kids. He has always been wonderful around the house and with the kids. His patience level is at "0" right now. I typed out a long page of how I was feeling and what I needed. I thought this would help. He read it said "thanks" and handed it back to me! I was soooo PISSED! It was like he totally just blew me off! He sat down and said I need to work on some things around the house while the kids are sleeping.
I have an appointment with my therapist on thursday. I tell him my mother is watching the kids, take the afternoon for yourself. He says ok that will be good. Thats it! I just want to yell "what the hell is wrong with you!" I told him that he needs to go sit on a rock for a couple of days alone and figure out what the hell is going on because he is being rude,short fused,argumentive, and just darn right I can't stand to be around him right now.
I am hungry, very hungry. Food is all around! I am pissed because I can not eat and want to eat. I want to have my comfort back, and I can not! I am very pissed for that! I fix my kids food and I find myself being resentful that I have to be on liquids! I want to eat! I had two dreams last night about funnel cakes and stuffed pancakes with strawberries and whipcream I would go to eat them then I would scream NOOOOOO...and wake up! Sounds funny but its really bothersome. I thought after this surgery my little hunger issue would go away and so far it has not! I thought well if I am not hungry then I wont want to eat like I did before. Maybe If I have this surgery I will just be ok and I will just never want to eat bad again!
I do want to eat like I use to. All those old habits are there this is not a magic bullet people. It is a life change,it is a mental change. I no longer can look at food for comfort,for love,for understanding,companionship,converstation,anger,
joy,happiness,and sadness. I have to just say its ok and I dont need you.
I will find a way to let this go. It is much like going through a divorce. I am bitter,sad, and angry! Crazy also that I feel this way about food!!!
I have an appointment with my therapist on thursday. I tell him my mother is watching the kids, take the afternoon for yourself. He says ok that will be good. Thats it! I just want to yell "what the hell is wrong with you!" I told him that he needs to go sit on a rock for a couple of days alone and figure out what the hell is going on because he is being rude,short fused,argumentive, and just darn right I can't stand to be around him right now.
I am hungry, very hungry. Food is all around! I am pissed because I can not eat and want to eat. I want to have my comfort back, and I can not! I am very pissed for that! I fix my kids food and I find myself being resentful that I have to be on liquids! I want to eat! I had two dreams last night about funnel cakes and stuffed pancakes with strawberries and whipcream I would go to eat them then I would scream NOOOOOO...and wake up! Sounds funny but its really bothersome. I thought after this surgery my little hunger issue would go away and so far it has not! I thought well if I am not hungry then I wont want to eat like I did before. Maybe If I have this surgery I will just be ok and I will just never want to eat bad again!
I do want to eat like I use to. All those old habits are there this is not a magic bullet people. It is a life change,it is a mental change. I no longer can look at food for comfort,for love,for understanding,companionship,converstation,anger,
joy,happiness,and sadness. I have to just say its ok and I dont need you.
I will find a way to let this go. It is much like going through a divorce. I am bitter,sad, and angry! Crazy also that I feel this way about food!!!
may 14th, 2007
May 14, 2007
Last night on the 13th I took this pain liquid medication they gave me. I took 3 teaspoon fulls thinking this will make me sleep good! OOO my !! I thought I was in Whacko Land 
I have no clue how people can do meth,heroine etc....I was actually hallucinating, thought I heard things,thought I was seeing things,sweating! I woke up finally early this morning at 600 felt like I had a hang over and said thats it im done! I will take tylenol before I take that crap again. We got up and had to return to San Francisco today. I started with fluids again. The drive was nice, I am just tired. Christina at Dr. C's office pulled my cath out. (girls only) only to find out guess what another buddy was here! Yes! can you believe it! Good Night
We drove home and my husband was starving I knew it. He did not want to stop and eat. I finally told him stop, I will be fine. I was not hungry but watching him eat was hard. He ate so fast. This man never eats fast, ever! He just whooffed it right down. We went to the grocery store, that really didn't bother me. We got home and I was making my daughters plate. I caught myself going to put food in my mouth, holly smokes! I was putting some snacks on my sons plate. I was up to my mouth and realized, stop! I have caught myself going to lick my fingers even. I am not physically starving. I see these foods that I use to love. It is hard. You have to really change your life style of eating and your habits! I do have some hunger pains later on this evening but nothing too bad. My Dad was bbqing chicken. The smell just bout sent shivers down my spine. It smelt like heaven.
We live two hours from Yosemite National Forest and we are going camping this weekend. It will be hard to be there, being surrounded by all that food! My mom and sister are both gastric bypass, so maybe they will be good support for me!
Right now yes I am feeling so hungry! The hunger pains are real and it sucks! Three weeks of this is going to be long. I was told it is the left over hormones in our intestines and this is common right after surgery.
Rana called me last night had a wonderful talk with her. She told me about the hunger pains! My body is right on target. I thought I am lucky I guess I don't have hunger. Well I do! I am going to walk or something to take my mind off of it. I will get pass this! Wow this is hard..! If anyone ever tells me I took the easy way out they better be ready for a verbal attack!
I have no clue how people can do meth,heroine etc....I was actually hallucinating, thought I heard things,thought I was seeing things,sweating! I woke up finally early this morning at 600 felt like I had a hang over and said thats it im done! I will take tylenol before I take that crap again. We got up and had to return to San Francisco today. I started with fluids again. The drive was nice, I am just tired. Christina at Dr. C's office pulled my cath out. (girls only) only to find out guess what another buddy was here! Yes! can you believe it! Good Night
We drove home and my husband was starving I knew it. He did not want to stop and eat. I finally told him stop, I will be fine. I was not hungry but watching him eat was hard. He ate so fast. This man never eats fast, ever! He just whooffed it right down. We went to the grocery store, that really didn't bother me. We got home and I was making my daughters plate. I caught myself going to put food in my mouth, holly smokes! I was putting some snacks on my sons plate. I was up to my mouth and realized, stop! I have caught myself going to lick my fingers even. I am not physically starving. I see these foods that I use to love. It is hard. You have to really change your life style of eating and your habits! I do have some hunger pains later on this evening but nothing too bad. My Dad was bbqing chicken. The smell just bout sent shivers down my spine. It smelt like heaven.
We live two hours from Yosemite National Forest and we are going camping this weekend. It will be hard to be there, being surrounded by all that food! My mom and sister are both gastric bypass, so maybe they will be good support for me!
Right now yes I am feeling so hungry! The hunger pains are real and it sucks! Three weeks of this is going to be long. I was told it is the left over hormones in our intestines and this is common right after surgery.
Rana called me last night had a wonderful talk with her. She told me about the hunger pains! My body is right on target. I thought I am lucky I guess I don't have hunger. Well I do! I am going to walk or something to take my mind off of it. I will get pass this! Wow this is hard..! If anyone ever tells me I took the easy way out they better be ready for a verbal attack!
update may 13 mothers day
May 12, 2007
I am up at 0530 couldnt sleep horrible pain in my neck,shoulders and back. I got up and drained my urine buddy. I walked a bit around the house that seemed to help. I still feel what the hell did I do. I knew there was going to be discomfort and pain but didn't realize this much. My back is just killing me! maybe its gas??? I am trying to sip sip sip but its hard every ten minutes from my shot glass. my mouth was bone dry when I woke up. I am terrified of dehydration at this point..more later today
feeling better. I read and all the pain is from gas from surgery. I have been walking a lot. When they tell you to walk, they mean it. People reading after surgery walk walk walk. It has helped with the gas more then anything. I got on a routine today every ten minutes I drink from my cute little shot glass with my name on it. I am even taking a picture of it and posting for my memories.
I first got in a 16 bottle of water that way and just now finishing up about 57 grams for protein. I guess I am suppose to have 70 grams of protein. I am almost there. I try and make that a priority instead of just shoving any liquid in me like broth etc. Its important to get that protein in so it will help minimize hair loss..key word I hope minimize.
I am feeling much better this afternoon,passing gas is wonderful
I am taking my multivitimins and calcium today as well. The main port in my stomach is still hurting, Dr. C said that is where they lift the liver so it will be more painful. I can not bend,I can not take care of my two children, one is 4 yrs and one is almost 1 yr old. If you have children make sure you have someone to help you daily!! You will not be able to do all the mommy things we do! That has been the hardest. It hard to watch as my daughter crys for me to pick her up and I can't. My husband will put her in my arms but we have to be careful she doesnt kick my stomach etc.
I am not having second doubts now, I think It is normal to have those thoughts and is just another process in this journey.
feeling better. I read and all the pain is from gas from surgery. I have been walking a lot. When they tell you to walk, they mean it. People reading after surgery walk walk walk. It has helped with the gas more then anything. I got on a routine today every ten minutes I drink from my cute little shot glass with my name on it. I am even taking a picture of it and posting for my memories.
I first got in a 16 bottle of water that way and just now finishing up about 57 grams for protein. I guess I am suppose to have 70 grams of protein. I am almost there. I try and make that a priority instead of just shoving any liquid in me like broth etc. Its important to get that protein in so it will help minimize hair loss..key word I hope minimize.
I am feeling much better this afternoon,passing gas is wonderful
I am taking my multivitimins and calcium today as well. The main port in my stomach is still hurting, Dr. C said that is where they lift the liver so it will be more painful. I can not bend,I can not take care of my two children, one is 4 yrs and one is almost 1 yr old. If you have children make sure you have someone to help you daily!! You will not be able to do all the mommy things we do! That has been the hardest. It hard to watch as my daughter crys for me to pick her up and I can't. My husband will put her in my arms but we have to be careful she doesnt kick my stomach etc.
I am not having second doubts now, I think It is normal to have those thoughts and is just another process in this journey.
HOME SWEET HOME
May 12, 2007
There is no place like home. We went to the city on Wednesday it was the hard. We stopped at Applebees 'and I had watch everyone eat while I had to suck the broth out of a French onion soup. The hotel was clean but old, it did its job for the one night I was there and the next my husbands. It was the Cathedral Hotel in San Fran. They had a bar downstairs was nice. I ordered a bowl of chicken noodle soup and it was beautiful! I had huge chunks of white chicken,peas,carrots,and rice! I was good only broth.
We got to the hospital at 1pm on Thursday. Waited one hour and got back to the prep area. Sat on a bed and the nurse said he is one patient behind and finishing the one he is on now. This was at 330pm my scheduled time. I told her then actually that would make two behind. I did a meditation prior and was actually quite relaxed.
700 pm rolls around and they ask me back only to wait another 30 minuntes. I walk in go under and next thing I know I am awake and feeeling horrible.
They told me it took longer due to a very very very large hernia. my stomach was actually up into my esphagus. They had to repair that and then do the sleeve.
I was on medication most of Friday. They put a cath in me but I couldn't urinate on my own after they pulled it. They finally cath'd me again sent me home with six pill bottles and said come back Monday and we will take it out. They didn't want my bladder to rupture over the weekend and thought it could be a bladder infection, due to the original cath they did.
I came home and honestly I felt horrrrible! I slept all night after medication, awoke to a horrrible headache. I thought I was dying. My stomach hurt my head was just i n agony, I would run a low grade fever just around 99 which isnt nothing. I took some strong pain meds, slept and felt much much better. I just wanted to get this posted before I forgot something. NOw I am working on fluids and walking so I dont dehydrate
We got to the hospital at 1pm on Thursday. Waited one hour and got back to the prep area. Sat on a bed and the nurse said he is one patient behind and finishing the one he is on now. This was at 330pm my scheduled time. I told her then actually that would make two behind. I did a meditation prior and was actually quite relaxed.
700 pm rolls around and they ask me back only to wait another 30 minuntes. I walk in go under and next thing I know I am awake and feeeling horrible.
They told me it took longer due to a very very very large hernia. my stomach was actually up into my esphagus. They had to repair that and then do the sleeve.
I was on medication most of Friday. They put a cath in me but I couldn't urinate on my own after they pulled it. They finally cath'd me again sent me home with six pill bottles and said come back Monday and we will take it out. They didn't want my bladder to rupture over the weekend and thought it could be a bladder infection, due to the original cath they did.
I came home and honestly I felt horrrrible! I slept all night after medication, awoke to a horrrible headache. I thought I was dying. My stomach hurt my head was just i n agony, I would run a low grade fever just around 99 which isnt nothing. I took some strong pain meds, slept and felt much much better. I just wanted to get this posted before I forgot something. NOw I am working on fluids and walking so I dont dehydrate
Wow !!!!!
May 08, 2007
So wow here I am tomorrow we go to San Francisco and I start my all might liquid diet. Thursday is the big day. I have so much protein stuff we have it coming out our ears! I probably over did it but hey it will last! I know this surgery is going to go well. I have alot of people in my life that have been good role models and have touched me in one way or another. Thank you to all of you for loving me in my fluffiest,my meanest,my saddest,and my happiest. What does Cathy want I think I can answer that now. I want to thank these people! They all fill a space in my heart hotel!
My children-you are my life,my essence, you take my breath away and a mothers love can never run so deep that I have for you two precious babies. God blessed me with both of you through three misscarriages!
My Husband-you are my best friend. We have been through good and bad, the good has way out weighed the bad. Thank you for loving me for me and making me feel so loved and cared for. I couldn't ask for a better father and role model for our children then you. Thank you for your patience and always putting up with my mood swings
My parents for taking great care of my two children,My mom for trying to make things right after all these years,For my Dad who has a huge heart that doesn't know how to express his softer side at times, even though I know its buried behind that concrete wall
My Mother and Father In law, who financed this surgery and saved my life! you two have been so kind and helpful and soooo giving over the years. You are both angels and I thank you for all you have done for me and our family and loving me!
Connie,
you have been a mentor,soulmate,friend. I have grown and listened to your wisdom over the years. You have seen me grow into the women I am today over the past ten years, thanks for going to bat for me, being my shoulder to lean on and the ear that I need at times unconditionally
My Sister Carla
All your struggles you are a strong women, I am glad we have found peace between us and I love you and my nephews emensly
My sister Michelle,
I worry about you and hope you find peace in your spirit, you go to much and don't take time to enjoy the sky being blue,the fresh air, or the sun simply shinning on your face. Take time breath and find inner peace
Tiffany,
You struggle and want things now. Things will come for you in its time, its hard and depressing. You are strong and kind, this too shall pass and you will be on the losers bench also
My Grandparents
Thank you for being a part of my life and showing me that hard work does pay off
Myself,
Thank you for being brave to face your demons and fears, thank you for putting me first after all these years, thank you for taking time to love me
thank you for growing into a strong beautiful woman,who has become a loving mom who learns something new everyday. I know I don't have to be perfect anymore, I will make mistakes I will get angry I will get sad I will feel joy and happiness. I will finally just feel! This I am thankful for
Farewell for now and Welcome to the light Cathy
My children-you are my life,my essence, you take my breath away and a mothers love can never run so deep that I have for you two precious babies. God blessed me with both of you through three misscarriages!
My Husband-you are my best friend. We have been through good and bad, the good has way out weighed the bad. Thank you for loving me for me and making me feel so loved and cared for. I couldn't ask for a better father and role model for our children then you. Thank you for your patience and always putting up with my mood swings
My parents for taking great care of my two children,My mom for trying to make things right after all these years,For my Dad who has a huge heart that doesn't know how to express his softer side at times, even though I know its buried behind that concrete wall
My Mother and Father In law, who financed this surgery and saved my life! you two have been so kind and helpful and soooo giving over the years. You are both angels and I thank you for all you have done for me and our family and loving me!
Connie,
you have been a mentor,soulmate,friend. I have grown and listened to your wisdom over the years. You have seen me grow into the women I am today over the past ten years, thanks for going to bat for me, being my shoulder to lean on and the ear that I need at times unconditionally
My Sister Carla
All your struggles you are a strong women, I am glad we have found peace between us and I love you and my nephews emensly
My sister Michelle,
I worry about you and hope you find peace in your spirit, you go to much and don't take time to enjoy the sky being blue,the fresh air, or the sun simply shinning on your face. Take time breath and find inner peace
Tiffany,
You struggle and want things now. Things will come for you in its time, its hard and depressing. You are strong and kind, this too shall pass and you will be on the losers bench also
My Grandparents
Thank you for being a part of my life and showing me that hard work does pay off
Myself,
Thank you for being brave to face your demons and fears, thank you for putting me first after all these years, thank you for taking time to love me
thank you for growing into a strong beautiful woman,who has become a loving mom who learns something new everyday. I know I don't have to be perfect anymore, I will make mistakes I will get angry I will get sad I will feel joy and happiness. I will finally just feel! This I am thankful for
Farewell for now and Welcome to the light Cathy
My Wishes
May 07, 2007
Be a good healthy role model for my kids
Be Healthy
Have energy
Smile often
Be sociable
Play more with my children
Be sexy for my husband
Hike Half Dome next year since we are only two hours from Yosemite
Cross my legs without pain
Being able to have normal Hygiene issues
Exercise and weight lift and see a difference
Go into any store because they will all have my size
Self Confidence
Lye on a beach and be comfortable
Not have sweat drip down any nook or cranny
Not have knee,hip,back,ankle pain
Be able not to sweat whenever I walk to the bathroom and back
Be able to clean my house in less then six hours.
Be able to put groceries away with out five breaks in between
Be able to walk the mall with out grabbing an oxygen bottle from a copd patient (kidding)
Be Healthy
Have energy
Smile often
Be sociable
Play more with my children
Be sexy for my husband
Hike Half Dome next year since we are only two hours from Yosemite
Cross my legs without pain
Being able to have normal Hygiene issues
Exercise and weight lift and see a difference
Go into any store because they will all have my size
Self Confidence
Lye on a beach and be comfortable
Not have sweat drip down any nook or cranny
Not have knee,hip,back,ankle pain
Be able not to sweat whenever I walk to the bathroom and back
Be able to clean my house in less then six hours.
Be able to put groceries away with out five breaks in between
Be able to walk the mall with out grabbing an oxygen bottle from a copd patient (kidding)
Holy Smokes !
May 07, 2007
THE FINAL THREE DAYS
ok the big count down
May 06, 2007
Size 20-22w pants Size 3x or 26/28 shirt
my weight 245 lbs/BMI 41
my measurements
left bicep 15 inches
right bicep 15 inches
Chest 50 inches
Stomach 47 1/2 inches
Hips 53 1/2 inches
left thigh 31 inches
right thigh 31 inches
I will be entering a picture of me holding up a size 9 pair of pants on my monthly anniversary. So I have a photo journal of my year long journey. Along with my measurements every four months.
want to be goofy
May 03, 2007
ok so this is my journey from beginning to end
About Me
Location
28.8
BMI
Surgery
05/10/2007
Surgery Date
Mar 12, 2007
Member Since
