angela-thomas

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janet B. 23 years, 3 months ago

Hi Angela My previous post took off without me (pushed the wrong button) but I wanted to respond to your message as I could feel the pain coming from it. None of us can replace your relationship with your Mom, but we can stand in as your sisters with a common bond. All I can say to you is that this surgery/new way of life must be what YOU need and want. Someone can send all the articles about 200 lb weightloss but realistically, how often does that happen...and if it did, how long would it stay gone. For myself, I had a new grandchild and I knew that if I didn't have this done, I wasn't going to be around to play with her, take her to the park, or just to be here for her. Everyone gets scared about this surgery--it's life altering, but most of us need this jolt to get our lives on track and get some ammunition to knock off some of the emotional baggage we've acquired because of our weight and the reasons that got us there. I'm so sorry for running on but you deserve this chance and people that have contributed to the pain you feel should not have more say in your future than you do. Janet Beall

Sharon Neva 23 years, 3 months ago

ANGELA~~BEST WISHES ON YOUR WLS JOURNEY~~ May the world hug you today with its warmth, and love.....Pray it whispers a joyful tune in your heart.....And may the wind carry a voice that tells you there is a friend sitting in another corner of the world wishing you well!~~

asumamma1 23 years, 3 months ago

Dear Angela--I read your post today and my heart goes out to you! I am so sorry that your mom isn't being there for you with support. But, you and I both know one thing: you cannot control anyone's actions except your own. If you feel that you have researched WLS, are aware of the risks, and want to do this to improve your health and quality of life---then do it. I think you did the right thing by telling your mom so that your husband and sister wouldn't be put in an awkward situation. But now that you have done that, you have met your obligation. Hopefully, she will come around and be able to support you in some way. You have to do what you are doing for YOU and for no one else. I'll be praying that you find peace in this situation. God bless you and your family. If I can help you in any way, please just send me a note. Love ya!

millerkb 23 years, 3 months ago

Angela- Hang in there! The only person in my family that I have told about my WLS is my sister. She says she is supportive but she would rather not talk about it at all. My parents are deceased, but I still long for their presence. I don't have a date for my surgery...heck, I haven't even gone to my individual consultation! But I'm here in Chesapeake if you ever need to talk. Take care and may God continue to bless you in this journey of life.

Bethy413 23 years, 3 months ago

Angela, I am so sorry for the way you feel right now. I don't know what I would do without knowing I have my parents to turn to. I wish I lived close to you, I would come give you a big hug and go to the hospital with you when it's time. Bless your heart. If you need to talk, I'm just an email away.

Leslie E. 23 years, 3 months ago

You are not alone. You have the caring and supportive family on this site. I wish you the best of luck on your surgery and a speedy recovery. Blessings,

mbntexas 23 years, 3 months ago

Angela--I wish we lived close to one another-I'd come give you a hug! This is a hard thing to go thru without family support, BUT, you've got to do this for YOU, not for anyone or anything else. You are the only one who can make you happy. My sister wasn't supportive until after I was about 4 months post op. Now she sees that even though I had problems initially, this was something I needed to do for me. You will have doubts before surgery, that's normal. You'll probably get scared to death, I did, but that's normal too. I'm blessed with a family that supported me thru my ordeal and still supports me. You'll be in my prayers, this is a life changing, lifestyle changing process. Best of luck and God Bless you!

Alice W. 23 years, 3 months ago

Angela Hello~~~I just read your post and know how you must be feeling. My Mom and I were never close, she was also ill. I had the surgery almost 5 months ago and had to do it on my own. No help from family or husband--it is not easy but you CAN do it! I posted alot and received the support and love right here, from the Wonderful AMOS family. Try it--post ALL of your feelings good or bad--everytime you need it! Also, giving support to other people is also very helpful and makes the time before surgery go very fast. Wishing you all the very best with your surgery. May all your dreams come true!

Bobbi_Wigley 23 years, 3 months ago

Angela...when I read your post, it brought tears to my eyes. I don't know what I would do w/o my mom, she has been supportive of me having surgery since day 1. But it hasn't always been this way!! Just keep in mind that you did make the contact, maybe follow with a phone call? Maybe it will make you feel a little better knowing you've done all you can. Don't forget all your friends here will be with you in spirit and praying for the best for you!! You are in my thoughts and prayers!! God Bless you!! I'm sending lots of big hugs to you!!! Love, Bobbi

ANGELA V. 23 years, 3 months ago

ANGELA~ I 1 ST WANNA SAY I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR UPCOMING SURGERY!!!! I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. FOR ME MY PARENTS WEREN'T THERE FOR ME AT ALL. THEY LIVE 2 BLOCKS AWAY. DIDN'T COME & SAY BYE OR VISIT ME. WHEN I CAME HOME IT TOOK THEM WKS TO COME SEE ME. I ALWAYS CRIED. MY HUSBAND WOULD GET MAD & SAY THEY WEREN'T WORTH IT. I WANTED MY "MOMMY" SO BAD IT HURT. (SHE WAS NEVER THERE FOR ME GROWING UP) DAD DID IT ALL WHILE SHE SLEPT OR DRANK. SO, WHAT I DID IS I HAD WORKED MY SURGERY AROUND TO WHERE I COULD HAVE IT THE SAME DAY AS A LADY IN MY SUPPORT GROUP. HER DAUGHETER A FEW YRS YOUNGER THAN ME TOOK US DID OUR HAIR & WHEN I CAME OUT OF SURGERY HER DAUGHTER WAS THERE!! I CRIED!!!THEN, WHEN HER MOM CAME OUT SHE WENT OVER THERE. IT TOOK ME A FEW HRS BUT I GOT UP TO WALK TO SEE HER 2 RMS DOWN. ONE, NIGHT I WAS THERE IN MY ROOM I WAS CRYING I FELT SO ALONE... HERE WAS A HUGE HOSP. WE ARE ALL ARE GETTING THE SAME SURGERY I WAS IN A ROOM BY MYSELF NO FAMILY, NO FRIENDS, NO FLOWERS NADA. BUT, I GUESS I TOUGHNED UP. CAUSE I THANK GOD I HAD IT & THAT THAT LADY & HER DAUGHTER WERE THERE FOR ME AS WELL AS MY HUSBAND. WHO BY THE WAY STAYED HOME WITH OUR DAUGHTERS. TOO THIS DAY HE IS MY BIG SUPPORTER. UNLIKE MY FOLKS. I DON'T KNOW IF IT CAUSE I AM BIG OR WHAT. BUT, I HAVE "MY" FAMILY. MY HUSBAND & 2 GIRLS. SO, IF YOU EVER NEED ANYTHING E MAIL ME. I CAN GIVE YOU MY PHONE #. I KINDA NOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THRU. TAKE CARE & AGAIN I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST!! ~ANGELA VILLA OPEN RNY OCT 16-02 START 360 CURRENT 299 LOST 61