sweetsandy81671

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Hello! the dr's office called me today to set up the appointment, wow I can not believ ethis is happeneing! shoudl be like nextmonth
I didnt think I would feel like this but I am scared!
worried- hopeing things go well, I am a bit emotional , I just hope things tuen out ok!

 My sister called me today, She was not so sure about this surgery afraid of regaining the weight, and not sure how it really works. But she said last night she spent time online looking and looking at pictures and reading profiles. It was nice to hear she has changed her way of thinking about this surgery, she is happy for me. I think she see's this is the way for me. I know I will do good. I just told my daughters who are 16 & 17 they are excited for me too. They have always known a mother who was plus sized, the have neverhad a normal sized mother, I think they are looking forward to that.

 I have had a fe people tell me I am taking the easy way out, I don't think this is an easy way out. I think this is just my way. I have been over weight my whole life. I don't feel like I have had a full life, I have not been happy my whole life. I want to be happy. I also hear people tell me your over weight for some reason- has o be emotional. I believe some people are emotional eaters but I don't eat cause I am sad or depressed, I just eat cause I like the taste of food. I am sure there are others out there that agree with me. But when I am full I don't tuff myself until I cant eat no more, so I think this is going to be good for me. I will be able to be more active and want to be out. Now I dont want to go anywhere. or do anything feeling like I am the one everyone is looking at. I just can't wait to feel normal for once in my life!!!!!!!

I just want the waiting to stop!!!!!

 

I hope that letter comes soon, to just have it in black and white would be awesome!

Well, this past week has been so hecktic! I bought this house about 1 year ago this month and have had so many sewer problems!! Back in November I had replaced all my lines from he house to the road $$$$$ and lots of it! We thought the problems were fixed ... nope Still problems in the basement, I had sewer again in my basement!!! YUCK! YUCK! YUCK! So I called my dad And my brothers and my boyfriend, they jackhammered up the floor and removed part of the old lines and fixed the entire line! I had anestamate at 10,000 they did it for under 200! I feel so lucky to have family that will jump right in to help when t is needed! It was not always like this but as we are all getting older we seem to al want to go int he same direction, that is nice.

I think my family not being close and me being the middle child had alot to do with my weight problems. I know I was looknig for somene to love me and food did. I never felt loved growing up just felt like I was just there. I know that is the reasone why I did so many things I did when I was young, had my girls at 17 & 18, ran away from home, caused trouble, and most of all stay with men who just did not treat me well seems like I was always picking out from the bottom of the barrel. I know this is the beginning of something big!!!!!!!! I love all my family especially My sister Michelle, brother Kenny, lil bro Scotty (not so little) and My dad... I hope to keep working and make the family better and bette!

The ins. company just said I was approved for this surgery!!!!!!!!
I just can not believe I was approved for this surgery - the waiting time was about 2 weeks. I have yet to receive the letter from the ins. company but I just got off the phone with the ins. lady and she said yes I was approved. I am just in shock I think. I have been waiting this for 4 years now and this time around with aetna has been so freaking easy. I had become addicted to reading and researching and researching about aetna and found they do approve a alot. But with my luck I thought they would deny me but I am so happy to say I am approved!!!

I am stillwaiting to hear back from the ins company
1 week down- up to 3 left

I need to vent

Wow I can not believe it is Feburary already. I started this back in July thinking time will never pass... Where does the time go?

Well I went to see my neurosurgeon today. I have a bad back one of the reasons I have been trying to have this surgery. He really has no answeres for me except surgery for my 2 bulging disks and degenerative disks I am only 35 and not ready for that. I talked to someone in the ofice waiting room today and she said it is a trade off to have surgery, I am not sure that is what I want to do at this point in my life.
I have said many times with a bad back I  know it is there.. I struggle with it everyday, the pain shooting down my leg almost to my feet, limping while I walk somdays (today is one) it is hard for me to start moving from a sitting position, people looking at me funny like i am lazy, slow, "faking" it.... that is is not real when all along I try to be normal and not show how much it hurts everyday.just so others don't think less of me because of my condition. Sometimes I get so angery because I feel like it is almost not fair- Why me? Why do I have to be the one with this? Having a weight problem isnt enough? I know it is not others fault but sometimes I can stop feeling life has tossed me a raw deal, I see others who have it all and here I struggle through everyday with pain, Pain I have to pretend is not there so others dont think less of me. That is a bunch of crap in my book!  The people how judge me dont get it- there are many things I cant do becaseu I know if i do I will be layed up for days I think it sucks. I have been on pain neds for 4 years I try not to take them becasue I do not want to be dependant on them, so Ionly take them when it is bad, meaning I am in pain ALL the time, I hope this surgery will help that- I pray for it. I do not want to live the rest of my life like this. The past few years have been the worst, Just stinks my daughters have had to see me like this. I hope they never have to go through the things Ihave had to with this. Whew! I am not going to go on anymore...

 

Not much going on this weekend, Just trying to pass the time waiting and waiting and waiting some more, hopeing they approve me. Reading and reading and reading more profiles! I wll say all those profiles I have read and all the photo's I have looked at have helped me SOOOO much! 

So for those who post not sure if they are helping others they are. I have become addicted to reading them. I just want to know everything there is to know about  pre and post op. Thanks!

I hope I will be postin post op soon!

I had a weigh in appointment with my Dr. I have been up and down 6 pounds in 7 months. I have a foot problem, an inflamed burssel sack????  Well, it makes it hard for me to walk around so it is hard for me to work out. Sometimes the pain is horriable! 

So beings I am supposed to lose weight has made it rather hard. 

I called Aetna today to see if they have received my paperwork yet, they had. It has been sitting in a holding area for a WEEK! UGH!! Don't these people know I have been waiting long enough?? common what's the deal  here? Well, they have it now that i have wasted a week I have 2- 4 weeks MORE to wait! Let's just hope it is worth it!!