ms_rys
Seasons - Donald Lawrence and The Tri-City Singers
I feel seasons everywhere
I feel blessings in the air
The seeds that you've sown
You're gonna come into your own
Seasons, walk into your season
I believe that we're in a time
When God's gonna bless the saints
Those who have stayed, those who have prayed
He's gonna fulfill the promise He made
For I hear the spirit say
It's your time, the wait is over
Walk into your season
I feel seasons everywhere
I feel blessings in the air
The seeds that you've sown
You're gonna come into your own
Seasons, walk into your season
I know that you've invested a lot
And the return has been slow
You throw up your hands and say
I give up, I just can't take this anymore
But I hear the spirit say
It's your time, your wait is over
walk into your season
You survived the worst of times
God was always on your side
Stake your claim, write your name
Walk into this wealthy place
But I hear the spirit say
It's your time, your wait is over
Walk into your season
The wait is over, it's your time
Walk into your season
This song represents where I am write now. I truly believe that it's my season, and I need to get my life in order before I can go any further.
I'm a 31 year old teacher who has tried just about everything to try to lose weight. I come from a close knit family, and I know that they love me regardless, but they are concerned about the weight that I've gained in the last few years. My sister still refers to me as her baby sister, but this baby is bigger than her sister. I'm finally taking control of my life and doing the things that I'm supposed to be doing. I know it will be hard, and I'm willing to make that sacrifice. I know that I'm not alone in this struggle. My lifelong best friends understand that this is something that I want to do and they are supportive, but I'm not sure that everyone will. But they don't have to live my life. They don't know what it's like to be fat. As long as my family is supportive, then that's all that matters to me.
10-26-05-Introducing...Pt.1
I was approved for surgery today! Not only that, I finally told my mother that I was considering surgery, and was pleasantly surprised that she was supportive. I did plenty of research so that I could answer her questions confidently. That makes me feel so much better about things. I know if I've got her on my side, then I can convince my father that this is a good thing.
10-28-05-Introducing.... Pt. 2
I've been fighting the weight battle pretty much my whole life. I've had high cholesterol since I was 14. It was hereditary; we didn't eat a lot of junk growing up. In high school I weighed 145 pounds, but I worked out every day and did some kind of exercise in gym class. I even enjoyed it. When I went college, it was down hill from there. After college it was worse. I did the phen-fen thing and Weight Watchers more than I can count, only to gain it all back.
After my last heartbreak, I really started to lose control of everything in my life. Now, I'm in the process of getting my life back.
10-29-05- To-do List
I finally told my sister, even though my mother told her before I could have a chance. That's fine, I knew she would anyway. My sister and I are very close, and her opinion means alot to me. I'm glad that she'll support me.
I've always wanted to post this so here goes:
Things I want to be able to do when I'm thinner:
1. Walk without thighs rubbing together
2. Do some moderate activity without sweating profusely
3. Fit in an airplane seat comfortably
4. Try on clothes at the store instead of at home
5. Shop with my mother and sister in the same section of a store without having to go to the other side of the world to find the Women's section
6. Have enough self-confidence to talk to a man without wondering if he thinks I'm too fat.
7. Wear clothes that don't have the size label ending in X
8. Teach my step team how to step without getting winded and looking like I ran the Boston Marathon.
9. Raise my self-esteem
10. Not look so mean all the time ( I don't think I do, but other people tell me that I do)
11. Play with my niece without getting tired (I still have time for that since she's only 3 1/2 months old now)
11-4-05- The weary teacher
I know it's been awhile, but I haven't been getting home before 9:30-10:00 every night this week. I not only teach, but I have an evening job with Adult Education. It's been really tiring. My concern about surgery is being able to balance this schedule with my new eating habits. I'm going to have to pack a cooler! I'm also wondering how some of my friends are going to feel about me having surgery. I'll deal with it when it comes. But besides being tired, I'm still gathering information about the surgery and life afterwards. I'm trying to change my eating habits, but this week didn't help at all. But, like the song says, I'll "get back up again."
Today is my first day off (thank God) but as usual I've been busy. This week I went to my first class and support group meeting. Now I'm really excited about having surgery. The people I met really looked good! I'm trying to change my eating habits, because I've made some really bad choices this week. I've also been having crazy dreams. I think it's because I've been a little nervous and excited about surgery. I know it will pass. I'm going to enjoy my day off and my long weekend.
11-20-05- The negligent poster
I have a feeling I'm going to be bad at posting regularly. When I get home from night school, sometimes I read posts and other times I just get ready to go to bed. I went to the doctor last week, and I have to take Glucotrol now. My blood sugar was up. I was surprised but not surprised either because I have been eating terribly for the last month or so. Fast food has become a fast friend. I feel like I've been made to break up with a boyfriend who I knew in my heart was bad for me, but living in denial about it. After church I went to the store and bought some sugar free snacks so that I wouldn't suffer too much. My doctor told me that I was having surgery just in time, and that once I lose weight, I won't have to take that or my blood pressure medicine. I'm hoping to get off of that. At 31 cutting at 32, I shouldn't be on all of these medications. Sigh...
I always get a little depressed during the holidays. Don't get me wrong, I love the holidays. I love being with my family. But as I get older, I long for someone to be in my life during Christmas and New Year's. Something about Christmas always brings out the romantic in me. I know the reason for the season, but it would be nice...
Thanksgiving is coming....
Here's what swoon.com says about my strange dreams:
Insects
An obstacle dream. If you succeeded in killing them or otherwise getting rid of them, or if they didn't annoy you, it signifies that your difficulties will be easier to overcome than you anticipate.
I did kill them all!
Execution
To see or be aware of an execution in your dream suggests that the success of some current undertaking is doubtful and if achieved will take more money, effort, and/or time (whichever applies) than you anticipated. To be condemned to execution signifies good news concerning a health problem. To dream of an execution forecasts some disturbing news of a friend or associate.
I had this dream a couple of weeks ago. It kinda bothered me...
Pregnancy
For a woman, this dream forecasts a happy increase in material wealth, but for a man, it is a warning against indiscriminate sex relations.
sounds like it's good for me....
11-27-05- 16 more days until surgery
Happy belated thanksgiving! I've been busy getting ready to go to NJ and I'm back in VA already. I had a good time at home; I was glad to see my parents, my sister, her husband and my new niece who I was just in love with. I miss her already. I've started counting down to my surgery because I'm ready for surgery and I'm ready to have a break from work. I'm getting tired of my job and ready to do something different. But let's not dwell on that. Depending on what my doctor says and how my boss reacts will help me decide how long I will stay out of work. I may stay out until Christmas break, or I may just stay out the rest of the week of my surgery. Thanksgiving was my last good meal for a long time. But, I tried to look at the bright side and that is that I will be much thinner (I hope) next year, and though I won't be able to eat what I want, I will be more healthy. I was telling one of my childhood friends about the surgery and how we need to be more proactive in helping each other with our health. We're still young and there's no reason why we can't support each other. Tomorrow I meet with the dietician and have my health review. I'm looking forward to getting another step done before surgery. It's not really that far away. And I still have to do all my Christmas shopping~~~ yikes!
Until next time...
I feel like my surgery date is right here. And it is right around the corner. I went yesterday for my bloodwork, chest x-ray and EKG. I wasn't expecting all of that, but whatever, it had to be done. As she was giving me instructions (and a cup to pee in), I began to realize that my surgery date is coming up very soon, and I have to get ready. I haven't told my boss that I'm going to be out yet, and I'm nervous that she'll ask a bunch of questions. I don't plan on telling too many people why I'm going to be out. People tend to watch you when you're trying to lose weight, and I don't like people watching me as it is. If they figure it out on their own, then that's on them, but I don't plan on telling anyone else. I want to tell a good friend of mine, but she is so critical about things that she doesn't like and she'll tell anyone who is listening about it. I just don't want her to be discussing my decision with the rest of the world. I love her to death, but I'm just a little nervous about that. I know she'll be mad that I didn't tell her though.
Anyway, I'm still living a boring existence and there's nothing interesting going on. I've been doing a lot of shopping on HSN and none of it is for Christmas presents. It's all been for myself. They've got great things, and sometimes I find myself watching for hours, or flipping back and forth between that and QVC.
It's the weekend and I have a lot to do, because next weekend I'll be preparing for surgery.
TTFN!
In one week I'll be a different person, I'll be a bandit. Frankly, as anxious as I am, I can't wait. I've pictured myself with my head held high and my self-esteem back to where it used to be. I'm ready to change my life. I've been busy getting ready, but I don't think the gravity of it has hit me yet. Maybe tomorrow after my pre-op appointment. It's really here, less than ten days. I just pray that everything will go as planned.
Until later...
Last night I had a dream that I was at the hospital and the nurses were trying to put in a catheter when I didn't need one. Then I tried to get up off the table, I couldn't walk. I know it's just a dream and it's because I met with the doctor. My days are getting numbered and I'm getting a little nervous. I still have a lot to do. Well, not a whole lot, but enough to keep me occupied for a while. TTFN, I have to finish my Christmas shopping.
It's the day before surgery and I've spent a lot of it by myself. Not that anything is wrong with it, I've done a lot of reflecting over the weekend and today. The only downside is this freaking clear liquid diet. I only hope that it gets better over time. I think if I could have soup then it wouldn't be as bad. I keep thinking tomorrow this time and here's a few things that I have come up with.
Tomorrow this time....
-my life will be TOTALLY different
-I get to start my eating habits over
-I might be in pain
-the wondering will be over
-I'll be on the banded side (I hear it's kinda nice)
I'll be back on as soon as I feel like it.
See you on the banded side!
December 15, 2005 +2 days....I'm back!!!
Hi Everyone!
I'm back and banded and feeling better as the days go on. Tuesday was a blur. The only time I got a little nervous was when I was wheeled to the operating room. When the nurse put the heart monitor on me, I could hear my heart beating a little fast, and that made me more nervous. All of the activity was a little nerve racking. When she told me to count backwards, I started reciting Psalm 23, and I don't remember making it to the second verse. I wanted to keep my eyes open a little bit longer, but I couldn't. Then I woke up to nurses talking and one nurse kept telling me to take deep breaths. Then she gave me some oxygen to help me breathe. She gave me some pain medicine and I slept a little bit longer. I was wheeled back to my room where I met my parents. We all slept a little while longer. Then the nurse helped me up to go to the bathroom and once I did that, I could go home. Once at home, I slept and took my pain medicine, not too interested in drinking anything, but I tried. The middle of the night was scary, because I took a sip of water and then it came back up. I kept thinking what if I can't stop dry heaving, I'll have to go all the way back to the hospital. I sat in a chair for a little while, then gently climbed into bed. The next morning I had to go back for my upper GI test. That stuff is HORRIBLE! But I was feeling a little better until I got home. I had a
Until later.
December 19-6 days out.
I'm almost a week out of surgery and I've lost 7 pounds. The full liquid diet is hard because I want to chew something so bad! But, I'm hanging in there. Today I ventured out the house and spent some money getting my eyebrows waxed, pedicure, and a full set of nails! Now I feel more like myself. Tomorrow I get my hair done. I can't wait until I go to ATL because I'll be around my sister, BIL, and niece. It's getting kind of lonely around here with no one to talk to face to face. I always get a little down around Christmas and New Years because I'm single and though I know that being with family is important, I wish that I had someone to share these holidays with, especially since my birthday is also around the corner. Otherwise, I'm doing all right. I pulled off my steri-strips, I just couldn't take it anymore. But, they are all closed and are forming scabs. I'll keep watching them. The strips were all mangy and nasty and I didn't like the way that they looked. My mother was a little hot with me, but oh well, it's not like I'm going to wrestle pigs.
Until later....
Happy New Year! I spent Christmas in ATL and it was wonderful. I really enjoyed spending time playing with my little niece. She is a true joy. She would just watch me and wait for me to make her laugh. I started on mushie foods, and honestly it was mostly soft foods. I ate very slowly and chewed very well. I have been eating tuna fish and eggs, but I did have a little of Christmas dinner. I didn't have any problems. I was a little concerned because I didn't think I was getting enough protein, and I still don't think so. I have increased my water, but it's very difficult to do. I have gotten better. I've lost 13 pounds so far, and I feel pretty good. My parents say that they can see it in my face, and I'm glad, I hate having a double chin. I'm not ready to go back to work on Tuesday because I'll be busy during the week as usual. I have to go in and see what the kids have done while I was gone. But, it's all gravy, because that's what I'm used to. I'm going to spend the day cooking so that I'll have food for the upcoming week. I don't think I'm going to church tonight as I usually do on New Year's. It's cold and rainy here, and I might just chill out and watch television. Besides, I still don't have all of my strength back, and I need to rectify that. My birthday is next Saturday, and I'll probably be doing the same thing that I'm doing today, which is absolutely nothing. Pitiful, isn't it?
Happy New Year!
Sorry I've been delinquent, but school's back in session and that means that Night School is back in session. More late nights, and now I'll be working on Thursday nights as well. I don't know when I'll be able to exercise unless I get up in the morning and do it, but I'm so not a morning person, and I don't look forward to the fact that the morning is the only time that I'll be able to work out. I did manage to get on my gazelle tonight and do a little upper arm workout, but I tell you that I'm tired now. I guess that's good, I'll go right to sleep. So far I've lost about 12 pounds and I'm happy with that. I can't wait until I'm under 240, and that's only because I haven't been there in so long. But I'm feeling good, better than I have in a long time.
I know it's been a minute but I've been so busy, and the only I do when I come home after a long day is maybe check my email and that's it. Things are going well, I'm down 16.5 pounds and I'm well on my way to achieving my first goal of losing 20 pounds before my first fill. Things are going well, I'm still struggling to get my protein in, but I'm doing better than before. I do get my water in, and I don't eat any junk, but I don't think I'm getting enough protein in, though my body isn't reacting. By the end of the week, I'm very tired, so much that I come home on Fridays, pull off my clothes and lay in the bed. I don't have any energy. I'm also trying to exercise more. That's another difficult thing to do, but I'm trying to work on my schedule. Anyway, my clothes are starting to get big and my fat face is decreasing. My sugar and blood pressure is better, and I'm not sweating profusely anymore. Things are good and I'm happy that I had the surgery.
I know it's been a minute, but I've been so busy that I don't have time to update. So, here I am on a Sunday morning (I should be at church, pray for me) watching and shopping on QVC. So far, I've lost 24 pounds, and I feel great. I had my first fill on Friday and I'm still very swollen. I can tell because I feel like I did about a week out from surgery. I'm sore, and I can't lay totally flat on my back or on my side. I popped a little piece of chicken in my mouth while making chicken salad, and that was not good. It definitely came back up. After that, I drank a CIB and laid down for awhile. I also think I was nauseous because I took a Vicodin that night because I was hurting. If it continues, I'll call the Dr. tomorrow. I don't think I'm too tight, I just think I'm swollen. Otherwise, I'm doing good. I've been exercising, drinking water, and eating what I'm supposed to be eating. I feel better and I can definitely tell that I'm losing weight. Things are going well for me, though I'm not happy at work. But that's another entry for later.
February 4, 2006- RIP, Coretta Scott King
I was looking at some pictures of Coretta Scott King and I can't help but feel a little sad that she is gone, but rejoicing that she is finally in heaven with God and Dr. King. It also bothers me that our children don't really know about the work she's done after her husband's death. But that's a post for another time.
Things are going well in the weight department. I'm still doing good. I have lost about 25 pounds, and I feel great. My clothes are big and people are starting to notice. I'm exercising regularly, getting my water in, and not eating any junk food. Sometimes I crave it, especially when my emotions run high (as they have this week), but I'm just holding on. My guilty pleasures are the special K cereal bars. I love those things! :). Anyway, I'm still hating my job, I just want a change so bad. My daily devotion gave me the verse John 15:7, "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you." (NIV) I'm trying to be patient and trust God, but I knew that I would have to deal with a lot of emotions that would come up once I stopped drowning my sorrows in food. But God is good, because I'm succeeding in my weight loss. Oh, the pain I was having was heartburn! Go figure...
TTFN!
Valentine's Day is my least favorite holiday. Maybe it's because I'm spending it alone again! And, this time of year is the worst for me, because I have memories of my stupid ex-boyfriend acting like an ass around this time four years ago. I've also been an evil assed biotch especially in this last week. I think it's because I can no longer hide my emotions in double cheese burgers and cheese cake anymore. I'm feeling good about myself. I've lost 27 pounds, my figure is coming back eventhough my cleavage is diminishing :(. So I'm happy about my weight loss. I'm tired of my job and I need to change schools. My only dilemma about changing schools is that I worked hard to get where I am in the school I'm in now. I'll be low man on the totem pole, and I don't want to wait another five years before I move back up. I'm just not too good about hiding things on my face, and my face has gotten me in trouble. I've eaten too much and now my chest hurts. I have to do a better job of measuring my food. I made some chilli which was so freakin' good I wanted to go to NJ and slap my own mama (then run really fast! ha ha ha). Enough of the boring stuff. I've even considered moving out of state, but there's someone here that I used to love and I'm wondering if we still have a chance. We were friends a long time ago and we broke up over something really stupid. That was 7 years ago. The truth is, I never really got over him and we've just started communicating again in the summer of 2004. I've only gotten up enough nerve to email him, and because I got so heavy, I didn't want him to see him. But now that I'm losing weight, I'm hoping that maybe I'll get the nerve to maybe ask him out? I don't know, I'm still so freaking shy, that I may end up spending my life alone because I'll let him get away. Who knows, he may already be gone. But he will always be the one that I will love deep down in my heart.
So long for now... I've got a busy week, so maybe I'll see you next Sunday.
I've been so stressed this week. It's been a busy week and I feel like I'm about to go off on somebody at work. The only good thing is that I'm still watching what I eat and I'm not cheating. I've been exercising and I'm still losing pretty good. I'm down another pound.
Sorry about Friday, the phone rang and I ended talking to my mom and sister for a couple of hours. I'm home again today, and I plan on getting some rest. I'm so thankful we have a day off tomorrow I could flip cartwheels. I'm down another pound and a half, almost to my 30 pound goal. That makes me happy. I've been doing really good. I thought I would miss eating the bad foods that I used to eat but I don't. I have extra money that I didn't have before. (Well, not really because I spend my money on QVC!) I'm ready to get out there and enjoy the world now. I want to take a nice vacation this summer. I want to go somewhere exotic. Well, not that exotic, but I want to go somewhere that I haven't been before. I'd love to go to an island, even if it's for a couple of days by myself. There are a couple of shows that I want to go to next month. One is Rachelle Ferrell. I love her! I'd love to go with someone special, but I don't have someone special to go with. I want to ask this guy but I'm too shy. I'm nervous that he'll say no. We used to be best friends a long time ago, but we had a really bad argument and haven't spoken since. I sent him an email a couple of summers ago, and he responded. We emailed each other a couple of times, but I didn't push it because I wasn't sure if he was still mad. Then, at the end of the school year, I sent him one more email. In August when we got back to school, he emailed me back. So now, we've been emailing at least once a week. We haven't spoken on the phone, but we have kept in contact. Sometimes I want to call him, but I just haven't gotten up the nerve. Now that I've lost some weight, I feel a little more confident, but not yet. He's the only one I've ever really loved and still love. Sigh... I'm just not sure of myself enough to ask him if he would like to go. Maybe even ask him if he wants to go see Madea's Family Reunion. I think that's going to be so funny. Maybe I'll get up the nerve to ask him out. We'll see. Well, I'm going to go be lazy. But I do have to wash clothes.
TTFN
I'm tired of the cold weather. If it's not going to snow here, then I want spring to come. And I want the end of the school year to come. I'm so unhappy in my job that I'm trying hard to hang in until June. Otherwise, my weightloss is steady, I had some mashed potatoes this week, and that caused me not to lose like I wanted to this past week. But they were good though! I'll do better this week. I bought some new clothes because I was droopy drawers! I went from a 20W to a 16W. Yeah! I can't wait until spring comes because then I will really be able to buy some cute clothes. My hair is shedding more heavily than before. I read in a post that it's from the anesthesia and that it will grow back in. I hope that is the case. I'm used to having thick hair, and now it's kind of thin. I'm still taking my vitamins and my biotin, hoping that it will help somehow.
March 5, 2006- "After you've done all you can...you just stand"
This song (by Donnie McClurkin) is so fitting for this week. I've been through some things, but I'm starting to feel better. I'm ready to start a new week, and not stress about things that I have no control over. My weight loss has started again. I was getting worried because I thought that I was going to be in a plateau. I did some reading and I did some things differently. The first thing I did was have some cake at our soul food luncheon. It was good too. Then I did Tae Bo. On the days that I don't get a full workout in, I make sure that I do bicep and tricep curls, sit-ups, and leg lifts. And, I've found out that when I'm stressed out, I am restricted, and I have to tell myself to eat. I never used to have that problem. I don't want the effects of stress to get to me anymore. I've had that problem before. I went to church today and there were some people there that I hadn't seen in awhile. I miss being there on a regular basis like I used to do. Once this school year is over, I will be more involved like I used to. I don't want to lose my connection with God. He's been too good. I praying that this week will be smoother than last week. But I'm going to get myself right by being connected to the father. I feel like I haven't done all that He has for me and I don't want to be disobedient anymore. He's brought me through too much for me to turn back now. I certainly wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for Him. If you're reading this and you don't know Him, I advise you to get to know Him and accept Him into your life. Confess that He died for our sins and you will be saved. There's nothing like the love of God.
I pray that God blesses you this week as I know he will bless and keep me.
It's beautiful today and it has been since Thursday. The sun is out, and it's like 70 degrees out. Absolutely beautiful! Too bad I haven't left the house today! Ha ha! I'm taking it easy today and just enjoying being in the house. I might go to Wal-Mart later, but then again I might not. I really have no reason to go out. This week was much better than last week. I wasn't as stressed out and night school was much better. In a couple of weeks I will be in ATL and
Let's see...nothing really exciting to report. I'm waiting for spring break to come. I've been so busy at work that I really need a break. With the way time is flying it will be here before I know it. The month of March is already flying past. People at work have been complimenting me on my weight loss. I'm straddling between a 16 and a 14. It depends on what it is. Some 16s are tight and some are loose. But that's good though. I haven't been a 14 in a good minute. I bought a suit that was a 14W. I couldn't believe it! I thought my mother was going to pee on herself when I told her. She says she can't wait to see me. I can't wait either. I'll see my niece next week too. I really can't wait to see her. I won't be checking in next week because I will be in
TTFN
I was in
Enough B&M, good night....
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood and I'm spending it being lazy. I'm so glad that it's finally getting warm. It's been a busy week but I made it. Next week is spring break and I couldn't be happier. I need a break. I can finally tell I need a fill because I'm feeling a little more hungry than usual, and I'll get one next Friday. My weight is still coming off, though it has slowed down. I know that I'm not exercising as much as I used to, but I plan to get back on that. I've got to keep my exercising up. Otherwise, things are going well. I need some new clothes because now that spring is here, I need to be cute.
Until later, go out and enjoy this beautiful day!
"Hosanna to the Son of David!"
"Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!"
"Hosanna in the highest!" Matthew 21:8-9
It's Palm Sunday and I went to the early morning service. So I'm back and relaxing on the computer and watching QVC. A very good looking man sat down beside me. He didn't really look at me (to my chagrin, I was looking cute too!) because he was into the sermon. It was good I must say, but I thought he would at least acknowledge me. That's terrible I know because we were in church. But he was the type of man that I would not mind talking to at all. I would really like to meet someone and spend time with someone special. Well, maybe I'll see him on Easter Sunday. We made it to spring break, and my fill got rescheduled again. I'm fighting with these last couple of pounds before I hit 40 pounds, but it was the same thing when I was trying to get to 30 pounds. I had an English muffin that didn't go down to well. I don't think I'm ready for bread yet. It doesn't go down easy at all. Oh well. Otherwise, things are good. Send me good thoughts that the guy I saw today A) isn't married and B) thinks I'm cute!
"See ya later dudes!" Squirt, Finding Nemo
Happy Resurrection Sunday! Today was a good day. The weather was beautiful and I went to church today. I saw alot of my friends that I used to hang around with and it was great. I then came home and watched television. Tomorrow it's back to work for me. In a way it's good because I was a lazy slob last week and I didn't exercise at all. Then today I ate some fried shrimp which are turning on me now. I had a fill on Thursday so I couldn't eat them all, but they weren't what I expected. I felt like eating seafood. Next time I'll buy some and cook them myself. I pretty much ate what I wanted, so next week I'll be back on the band wagon. I'm not looking forward to my busy schedule, but at least it will be closer to school getting out in June. Otherwise, I'm doing pretty good. I was feeling a little guilty about what I ate, but I realized that I can get back on track. I have to. I've come too far now. And besides, people are complimenting me on my weight loss. Anyway, I hope that you have a good week and I hope the same for myself.
Have a good one!
Well, it's another day in
Ok, I'm going to go and pack for the weekend.
Have a wonderful week.
It's been a little while but I've been away. And when I got back from NJ I hit the ground running. It's that time of year when it gets really stressful. I've been having some trouble eating certain foods and it's been tough, because certain kinds of chicken I can't eat, but I can eat cake, and I had a couple of pieces this week. I also have a cold, which is no fun I've learned. But I won't bore you with too many details. Guess what? I saw HIM. He came to my school for a meeting and I saw him in the hallway. He still has those beautiful eyes. He said that I looked good. He even emailed me the next day. I'm hopeful that maybe it will be the start of something. I don't want to spend another summer alone. We'll see. Otherwise, I'm tired and trying to get well, because I have another full week ahead of me.
30-something more days of school!
TTFN!
May 12- Hello, it's me
Surprise it's me on a beautiful Friday night here in VA. I'm home relaxing and taking it easy. I was planning to do some things around the house, but I'm watching television and hanging on the computer instead. Today I was kinda stressed out. Out of sorts is what I typed earlier today. I've had a lot of work to do, and I've got so many irons in the fire. I've also been feeling a little lonely lately. When I am stressed, I wish that I had someone to talk to and to take my mind of my troubles. But no such luck. But I'm not going to whine too much. I've been emotionally eating too. Those damn golden oreos! I'm not buying anymore anytime soon. They will be the death of me! Anyway, I'm hanging in there, I'm still losing but I don't get to exercise like I want to. Otherwise, things are going OK. School will be over soon and I will be glad. I won't miss the kids at all.
Hi all, I know it's been a minute, but I have been super busy and super lazy. I went to the doctor because I was having some stomach pain, and he told me to take Prilosec for two weeks. It's definitely much better. My weight loss is slowing and that's because I have been eating a lot of sweets lately. A little emotional, but doing better. But that's just a little catching up. There might be someone new in my life. He works at my school and we hung out together last night. Now, I can't get him off my mind. I haven't felt comfortable around anyone in a long time, and he wants to be with me. I still hear from HIM, but I don't know whether or not he is going to make a move. I've thrown him hints that I'm available, but I can't do any more than that. I don't know what's going to happen with this guy, but it will be nice if I can have some fun over the summer. I don't know if he's husband material, but it's way too early to tell. Right now, I'm just enjoying the company and trying not to lose my faculties too soon.
Until later...
It's about 5 minutes to and I haven't been sleeping well lately. I woke up at about this morning, and at 5 I decided to get up and work. Well, I didn't have the correct web address so I decided to check email and see what was going on here. School will be over soon and so will my stress. I've got so much to do that that's the reason I keep waking up at night. I'm about to get dressed and go into work. I've been smiling all week and that's because of the new guy. I'm trying not to fall too fast, because that's a mistake that I made in the past. My friends tell me to enjoy the ride, and that's what I'm trying to do. It's just been a long time since I've let anyone get close to me, and I still don't know how to deal with it. I heard from HIM yesterday, I didn't email him this week, he emailed me. Now that I've lost weight, men are looking at me and it's strange because I've spent a long time being invisible. I have to get used to this attention I guess, but it's still uncomfortable to me. Even when people call me skinny, it's strange because that's a term I haven't heard in a long tine. I guess I better get used to the attention, because it may not happen again.
I'm going to go and get ready for work. The next time you see me school will be over. Yahoo!!!!!
Saturday, June 17, 2006- School's Out for Summer!
Sorry it's been awhile but I have been so busy trying to finish out the school year. I'm so glad that it's over. I've so much to do around the house, and I'm starting to do that. I've been doing pretty good. I'm bummed out because my BP and cholesterol are still high. So, I have to change my diet again because apparently what I'm eating is raising my cholesterol. I think I'm going to make an appointment with the nutritionist. I hate taking Zocor and wish I didn't have to. I hate taking pills period.
In case you're interested, I had to cool things down with the new guy, because things were moving waaaaaaay too fast. I was having a hard time at work because there is someone there who is interested in him too. I don't think that I should get involved with him because he told me straight up that he wasn't trying to get into a relationship right now. Oh well, I have to protect my heart, because I can't have that broken anymore.
I did hear from HIM, and we're supposed to be getting together to have lunch sometime soon, don't know when. I'm trying to keep my options open and get used to all this attention that I'm getting. I'm definitely not used to it at all.
Sunday, June 25- Hanging in there!
I've been doing pretty good this week. The one thing I like about being home is that I have been able to exercise four days this week. I'm going to try to keep it up for the summer. I'm still working on my protein intake and looking to add more supplements to my diet because I'm still worried about my hair. I try to get my protein in, but it's hard. I'm still trying to make a conscious effort. My weight loss has slowed down, but I still lose about 1 to 1.5 pounds a week, which I am ok with actually. I don't want to lose it too quickly. I get compliments all the time now. And I get looks from men (still not used to it). Me and the new guy still talk often. I think it's going to be hard to let him go. I want him to have his freedom, but I still don't know what will happen to us. I'm trying to enjoy the ride, and hopefully I will be able to. But, when I don't see him, I miss him. And that could get me in trouble.
Until later...
Saturday, July 1- Oooh, Summer Madness....
I'm still enjoying being off and getting some things done around the house. I've managed to lose two pounds this week and that's pretty good. I had a slight reaction to the Zocor my doctor prescribed and that has hindered my exercise because my joints have been bothering me. My feet have also been bothering me. Today I feel better, but my feet have been itching like crazy. I'm having an allergic reaction to something, but I don't know what it is. Otherwise, I'm enjoying the summer and getting some rest. Next week I am going to ATL to see my sister and my precious niece and I can't wait. Nothing much to report. People are still making comments about my weight loss, and sometimes it gets on my nerves. They don't understand that I had to lose weight for my health and no other reason. But I guess they're just insecure about their own weight. I still wish they would leave me alone.
I'll update when I have a chance, since I'll be away, I don't know when I'll be able to come back to the website.
Have a great 4th!
July 31, 2006- I'm back!
I know it's been a minute but I've been in ATL and now I'm back and working at summer school. My days are long and pretty boring actually. My weight loss has slowed, but I still try to keep up with my exercise. I had a bad reaction to Zocor and I couldn't exercise for about 2 weeks. I tried, but my joints hurt so bad that it wasn't possible. Otherwise, things are good. I'm trying to prepare for the school year, not looking forward to another year in the classroom. But, in due time. Not really much else to report, but I'll try to do better about updating my page.