Lioc925
Here is to hoping that the 3rd time really is the charm. I started out with Kaiser approximately 2004. I had a hiccup in the psych part of the approval. I admitted that I binged ate, and they put a hold on the surgery. About a year later, we switched health insurance companies, and I tried again in 2006. I sailed through everything, and got the approval. Problem was that the anesthesiologist would not accept insurance as payment, he wanted cash upfront. I could not come up with the 2k he wanted in time for the surgery, and apparently 'canceled too late' and was hit with a $250 fee. So, I gave up.
About two weeks ago, I decided to try again. This time I have a different hospital that does everything via insurance company. My husband has not been working as much, so I am scared to death that we wont have the hours banked in his union, and they will reject me. I am 13 lbs heavier than I was back in 2006, and I don't see any end in my future for my weight.
I want to be a Paramedic so bad it hurts. I know its a crappy job, and its not even certain with sooo many changes going on, but it is just something I need to do. I actually went to school for EMT about 2 years ago, and was 2nd in my class. About 3 weeks from graduating, I saw how my weight really affected me in my patient care. It was hard for me to do CPR, to hold C-Spine, and to just be on the ground with the patient. I quit out of shame, and made up some lame excuse that I hurt my back. I have been so depressed ever sine.
MY goal was to do it again. Last January I said that I would start EMT school as soon as I got under 300lbs. Here we are in mid September, and I have not lost a single pound. I am afraid that I will kill myself with food, and I will die within my fat body.
My blood pressure is creeping up. I am pre diabetic now. My back is always hurting. My ankles swell almost all the time. I have to take a Vicodin just to go to bed at night because my body hurts under its own weight. This is it for me. This is my light at the end of the tunnel, my hope, my last resort.
