krena1
Being overweight has been a burden that I have carried my entire life. I have always been able to hide just how much my weight has affected me but now I am at the point in my life were I want a change. I have tried loosing weight ever since I was a pre-teen. I would loose a few pounds here and there but nothing substantial and nothing long term. I have always been described as the cute, short, chubby girl. I can't tell you how many times I have heard that. I don't even think people realize how their words cut at times. I know these people did not mean to hurt me intentionally but when you already have this image of yourself and then people validate it over and over that is all you come to know. Well, not anymore. I made the decision to make a permanent change in my life. I have 2 children that I want to be around for and be happy and healthy and someone they can be proud of. I don't want them being teased all the time for having the "fat mom". That is how I ended up here, starting my weight loss journey.
8-14-06 I am finally approved. I battled with the insurance company for about 4 months but now I am finally approved. The surgeons office said that they will call me in a few days with a date.
8-15-06I have a date. I got a call from my surgeons office with my pre-op appointment dates and my sugery date. I will have the RNY on 9-27-06. I was so excited I could barely contain myself. I tried calling my stepmom all day even though I knew she was at work. She has been so supportive during this entire process I could not wait to share the news with her. I finally got in touch with her later in the evening and she was so happy for me. She is so excited for me because she knows how much work I have put into this and how important it is for me.
8-16-06I finally told my dad today. At first he was very suprised but he was very supportive and very happy for me. I wish I could say the same about my boyfriend but, oh well. My dad told me that he would be there for anything that I needed. I love and adore him so much. I haven't told my mother yet. I will soon but I know that she is not going to be happy about this. She is the type of person that thinks if you go outside with your hair wet you will catch pneumonia. lol got to love her.
My pre-surgery appointments are9-1 Upper GI and Ultrasound and Labs9-15 Pre-op at surgeons office9-18 Pre-op at hospital9-26 Picc Line inserted(not looking forward to that)9-27 Surgery day
9-1-06I went for my Upper GI, ultrasound and labs today. The upper GI was not as bad as people made it out to be. Yes you do have to swallow a very thick substance but it is not the worst and once you drink it it's over. Taste like Maylox except it is thicker. The ultrasound of course was uneventful and when I went to the lab they took 10,yes 10, viles of blood. I was completely drained after that. lol literally I will update again as soon as something interesting happens.
9-2-06I don't understand people who claim to love you and yet can not support your decision to have this surgery. Especially when you have struggled your entire life to just be normal. I would think that your loved ones health and happiness would be more important than anything else. These people that say surgery is the "easy way out" and "all you have to do is eat right and exersice" make me want to just kick them. If it were truly that simple and that easy over half of America would not be overweight now would they. And, if they bother to do 5 minutes of research on this surgery for themselves, they would now that it is my no means the easy way out. :-(
9-7-06 I am so anxious and can not wait for the 27th to come. I am even more excited than before because of something that happened today. There was a woman at my job who had lost a great deal of weight. To make a long story short we started talking and she informed me that she had the RNY 1 year ago. She has done great with it. She was so open and so nice to me it really gave me comfort to actually know someone personally who has gone through this journey already. She had some great advice and tips for me. She also let me know that this farewell to all of my favorite foods binge I am on right now is completely normal. It is like I know that I won't be able to eat these things post op so I am enjoying them now.
9-8-06I got a call from the surgeons office today letting me know that my labs I got done last week were incomplete so I had to go on my lunch break to get more blood drawn. It wasn't that bad seeing as how the technician was very easy on me. ;-) I also found out that I need to start taking carbonyl iron today up until a week before surgery. So for the next 2 weeks I will be taking that. It truely amazes me at how supportive my family is and I can't thank them enough. I have some family locally but most of them live out of state. My sisters stay in constant contact with me and are there with me every step of the way, even if it is long distance. My father and stepmother live here and they have been great. My dad has even offered to be my support person. I might just take him up on that if things don't change at home pretty soon. I still haven't told my mother yet. I think I am going to wait until the week of my surgery before I tell her. I have told 2 of my friends at work. They were both very supportive,which I knew they would be.
I am still counting down the days,18 left to go. I think next week will go a little faster since I have my pre-op at the surgeons office to look forward to on Friday. I am really excited about that. I want to meet Denise who has been so helpful to me through out this process. I am also anxious to get all of my pre-op information. I want to know what I have to do to prepare for surgery. I am pretty sure I will have some type of diet the days leading up to my surgery day. Well, I am at work now so I will update soon.
9-11-06Thank God that the day went by uneventful in our country. I am still trying to patiently wait for the day I am on the losing side. It seems like the days are crawling by sooooo slowly, 16 more to go. I have my pre-op appointment coming up this Friday and I am really looking forward to that. I am anxious to get the last bit of information before surgery. It seems like my support system at home is going to be non-existant so I am not sure what I am going to do about that yet. If it's not one thing it's another. Oh well, I guess that is all apart of life. I will update soon.
9-14-0613 days to go and I can't wait. I have my pre-op with Dr. Smith and his staff tomorrow. I am really looking forward to that. I met with the Dr., the nutritionist, the insurance person and the dr.'s assistant. I am so excited to get the rest of the information I need to being this journey. I had a really bad experience yesterday. I went on a trip with my job that turned out to be an outdoor scavenger hunt. It was a team building activity. We were also taking pictures the entire time. I was so tired and winded it was a shame. I felt so bad, I was able to keep up with my team but my body was killing me. I can't wait to get into shape and get this weight off of me.
9-15-06Today was a great day. I had my pre-op at the doctors office and it was so informative. They gave tons of information about what to expect, my diet and how things will go in the hospital. It really feels like a reality now and I am so excited.
9-18-06I had my pre-op at the hospital today. It was basically a lot of paperwork and some labs. It was very long, I think I sat in the waiting room for almost 2 hours. Once I was in the back area I was there about another 30 minutes. I was really anxious when I left. I guess the reality of it all really hit me. Alot of it was excitment and a lot was nervousness. Just a little over a week to go and I will be on the loosing side.
9-19-06Today I finally got the nerve to tell my mother about my surgery. My sister was on the phone with me and she is the one who actually told her for me. Needless to say she was not happy. She went on and on about "all" I have to do is diet and exercise to loose weight. Well coming from someone who has been overweight for at least the last 30 years, that was not something I wanted to hear from her. She has been struggling with her weight ever since I was born so she should know that it is not that simple with some people. I was born a big baby and I have been overweight ever since. I am tired of the struggle and this surgery is a tool to help me gain some control. After the big conversation with my mother my sister called me back and told me that they have made arrangements for my other sister to come here to be with me and help out with my kids. She will come the day before my surgery and stay for a week. After she leaves another one of my sisters is going to come for another week, so I am truly fortunate. I know my mother means well but I just can't handle the stress right now of a person who is not being supportive of my decision.
I feel so blessed to have such a strong support system in my sisters and others that are close to me. My father and step-mother have been incredible as well. They are local which is nice and they are both going to be there on the day of my surgery. They have been there through all of the emotional ups and downs and whenever I have just needed someone to talk to. My best friend lives in Detroit and is so far away but she has truly been there in spirit. She is so sweet she called me to tell me that she ordered the dvd set of Walk Away the Pounds so I can get my exercise in after surgery. She is the best. She is also going to do the 2 day liquid diet that I have to do 2 days before surgery. All of my sisters and my step-mother are going to do it to. They are all so supportive.
9-20-06One week from today. The true count down starts now. **happy dance**
9-25My 2 day liquid diet stats today. I am really not looking forward to it but I know it is for my own good. I am happy to know that so many people close to me are doing the diet with me. My sister from Bermuda is coming in tomorrow to be with me during this time. She will be a big help with the kids too.
Well, it is the end of the day and I am not feeling well. I think that my body is going into sugar shock. I didn't realize everything liquid in my house was surgar free. I guess I will get over it. I am going to bed.
9-26I had my PICC line inserted today. It was not as bad as I thought it was. After the anesthetic wore off my arm was a bit sore but it was ok. I am on the second day on my liquid diet and today I can only have clear liquids. It is not as bad as yesterday. I also have my bowel prep at 2:00. Tomorrow is the big day. I am nervous and excited and anxious all at the same time. I will update after surgery.
Wednesday 9-27-06 I went in at 6:30 for surgery at 8:30. My dad, stepmom and sister all drove me there. We only had a few minute wait and then they took me and my sister upstairs to the prep area. My dad and stepmom had to go to a waiting area. We sat up there and I got changed into the gown. Dr. Smith came in and talked to me at about 8:00 and said we will start on time. After that they started my fluids, took my blood pressure and gave me a shot of a blood thinner(ouch). After that my dad, stepmom and boyfriend were able to come and spend the last few minutes with me. It seemed like that time flew by so fast. After that they put me in a wheel chair and told my family they could walk me down the hall. I got hugs and kisses from everyone and then they went one way and I went another. I was glad my boyfrined got there before they took me in for surgery. I got in the waiting room and it was freezing in there. I got on the table and it was nice and warm, that was a nice suprise. I was then told that they were going to give me something to relax me and then I would drift off. I was also told that while I was out they would put a beathing tube in but they would take it out before I woke up. That was the last thing I heard. I was out. The next thing I remember is waking up in recovery. I had the BEST nurse. Her name was Melissa and she took the best care of me. I don't remember a lot but I remember her being there everytime I called her. My family was able to come and see me at about 4:00 after being there all day. My dad walks in and says, "I see it working already". just like him to say something funny. I remember my mouth being really dry and them giving me a swap to saturate my mouth with. That was nice. I went up to my room at about 6:00 and got another nice suprise. A private room. That was the best treat. The rest of that night was really a blur. I remember my boyfriend and his mom bringing me some flowers and visiting me for a while.
Thursday 9-28-06 I was still really drugged up so I don't remember a lot. I do remember starting clear liquids and that went ok. Also my sister came to visit me in the afternoon. 2 lovely ladies from Florida that had surgery by my doctor also came to visit me. I thought that was very nice. That night my boyfriend came and spent the night with me. I thought that was sweet. He was really been there during this time. Everyone has really, near and far. I know I got lots of phone clls from people but I don't remember a lot of them.
Friday 9-29-06 A few friends from work came to visit me today. I thought that was really nice. My friend Laura came to visit and brought my sister up there too. My friend Laurel also came to visit me that morning and kept me company for a while. That night my boyfriend brought my daughter to come and see me. She is 12 so I thought she would be ok seeing me in there.
Saturday 9-30-06 At lunch today I finally got moved to full liquids. My doctor said that if I tolerated them well I could go home that night, which I did. I got home Saturday night at about 8:30 and I was very happy about that. It felt so good to be home and see my kids and my family.
Sunday 10-1-06Not much today. The pain definitely gets beter with each day. I got the worse bout of gas today and it was awful. I tried some soft scambled egg and that was the worse feeling ever. I could not get anything else in the rest of the day. My boyfriend came by today with his mother to visit. He helped me shower for the first time at home and that was really nice.
Monday 10-2-06 I feel much better today. I actually got out of the house and went to Target. I was nice to be out but I was really tired and sore when I got back. My mom came in today since me sister is leaving tomorrow. She will be there to help out with me and the kids so that will be nice. I talked to the doctors office and they want me to come in tomorrow instead of Wednesday for my one week appointment. I have been having a hard time getting liquids in so they want to make sure I am ok.
Tuesday 10-3-06 I feel even better today. Each day truly does get better. I went to the doctor this morning and I have lost 13.6 pounds. I could not believe it. I only had surgery 6 days ago. I am sure the 2 day liquid diet and bowel prep helped. Either way I'll take it.
Thursday 10-5-06 Today was the worse day so far. I have been having a hard time eating and getting my fluids in. I went out this afternoon without eating saying I would eat when I got back. I ended up being out longer than I expected so when I got home I was starving. I ate some tuna and mayo and it went down well, or so I thought. About 2 minutes after I was done I had the worst case of dumping. I felt horrible. I was dizzy and faint, my heart was racing, I was cold and clamy, my stomach was in knots and I thought I was going to pass out. It lasted about 20-30 minutes and it was the worst experience I have ever had. I never want to go through that again.
Saturday 10-7-06 I am still not getting enough fluids and food in. I am having a hard time with my protein shakes. They just do not sit well with me. I am going to try to find another source of protein. I am really starting to feel run down and no energy. I am tired of being in the house but everytime I go out I end up hurting and ready to come back home. I would just like to day that this is not an easy recovery and for all of the people who say that we are taking the easy way out, please understand that it is anything but. I don't regret having my surgery, I just thought I would bounce back a lot faster than I have. I figured that since I was young and for the most part healthy that I would recover rather quickly. I am healing well on the outside but the inside is what is causing me the most problems.
Sunday 10-8-06 Today I went to GNC and got the Isopure bottled protein drinks. They are not as bad as the other protein shakes I have tried but it has a very dry after taste, if that makes sense. I am still not eating very much but I am hoping it will get better. I will call the doctors office tomorrow and see what they say.
Monday 10-9-06 I called the doctors office and was told that I have to go to the hospital to get fluids and an upper GI to try to figure out where the pain is coming from. It is weird but I can tolerate solids a lot better than I can liquids. Hopefully they will be able to figure out what is going on so that I can get in the fluids and protein I am supposed to. We'll see.
Tuesday 10-10-06I had an upper GI today so I will see when my doctor gets the results tomorrow what is going on.
Thursday 10-12-06I had a visit at the doctors office today. Found out that as of today I have lost 18 pounds. 18 pounds in 2 weeks is not bad at all, I'll take it. I was told that I have reflux and that my esophegus(sp?) does not contract like it is supposed to right above my stomach and that is what is causing the pain when I drink. Hopefully it will improve over the next few weeks. I am taking nexium to help with the reflux.
Monday 10-16-06I started back to work today doing just half days. I will do that for one week. I have my one month appointment next Monday and I am really looking forward to that. The I will start back doing full days. I have gotten better on my eating. All of the things that I have tried I can tolerate pretty well. I am just not getting in enough protein. I have not found a protien suppliment that I like yet. I am still working on that. I feel pretty good physically. I still get tired a lot earier than I used to. If I do to much I am just really tired and I have to lay down for a few mintues.
Wednesday 10-18-06Today is my 3 week aniversary. I did weight today and according to my scale I have lost 20lbs. I am very happy with that, 20 lbs in 3 weeks is great to me. Work is going well. It is actually nice to be out of the house. I am glad that I am only doing half days right now, I don't think I could handle full days just yet. I'm sure I will handle them fine next week.
Thursday 10-19-06I had my support group meeting today and it was great. The topic was getting to goal and there was so much advice on how to get there. I was also able to meet several people that I met on my doctors message board so that was awesome. They are such a great group of people.
Friday 10-20-06I am feeling really good today. I do still get a few pains in my stomach where my incisions are but it is not bad enough that I have to take anything. I had a small piece of steak today and it was great. It was my first steak since surgery and it went down very well. Another new food I can add to my list.
Monday 10-23-06I had my one month follow up appointment today. I was very disappointed to learn that I have still only lost 20 lbs. That means only 2 lbs in the last 2 weeks. My doctor stated that I was right on schedule and I have already lost 17% of my excess body weight. He said by 3 months most people have lost 30% so I am over half way there already. I was glad to hear that but I was still disappointed in the numbers. Percentage wise I am still on track. I tried a Hanks protein shake over the weekend and it was the best I have ever had. It is the first protein shake I have been able to tolerate since I have had my surgery. I just wish it was not so expensive.
Friday 11-3-06Well, it has been a while since I updated. I have been back at work full time for 2 weeks now. I had my surgery 5 weeks and 2 days ago and I am doing great. I still don't have quite at much energy as I used to but it is getting a lot better. I have lost a total of 25 lbs so far which is 22% of my excess body weight. Not to bad I think. It is still a little frustrating at time that the numbers are not that big but then I have to look at the percentage and I am right on target with the averages. I am doing really well with my food although I do waste a lot. I buy lunch almost everyday at work and end up either giving most of it away for throwing it away. I know I should take my lunch but I never know what I feel like eating. One day I can eat something and really enjoy it and then the next day I have absolutely no desire for it. I don't do well with left overs and repeat items, I need the variety. I have also discovered the best protein shakes ever. They are call Hanks protein shakes and you can only them online and healthfitnesschannel.com. They are very expensive but worth every penny. The chocolate taste just like nestle quick and it has 22 g of protein per serving. They have no after taste at all. I have tried several protein shakes and this is the only one that I actually enjoy and don't mind drinking.
12-3-06Wow, I can't believe how long it has been since I have updated. In the beginning I always said I would not be one of those people that didn't update on a regular basis. I will get better. It has now been 9 1/2 weeks since my RNY surgery. I have lost 33% of my excess body weight which is 38 lbs. I am very happy with my progress so far. It was getting a bit frustrating seing such small numbers on the scale but then once I looked at the percentages I realized that I am right on track. It also helps that recently people have been making comments to me at work about how I look. A few of them will try to hint around about something changing or did I do something different to my hair, others have just come right out and said that they have noticed my loss and that I look great. That has been really nice. I have been feeling really good lately. I can eat just about anything in moderation of course, with the exception of sweets. I have to admit that I tried a few things that I probably should not have and I paid for it each time. I do dump on sugar. I can tolerate small amounts but nothing that has a lot of sugar in it. I still try to eat as much protein as I can since I don't have a protein shake that I can tolerate. I try to eat a lot of fish and chicken. As far as my fluids go, I probably drink about 40-50 oz a day. I am just not able to get in much more than that. I am still working on it though. Thanksgiving was really nice. It was not as hard as I thought it would be. It was at my house this year so there were lots of leftovers in my fridge. I was able to have a small taste of most of the things I wanted to try. I could not do the turkey or the desserts though. I actually tried a small amount of peach cobbler and got really sick, so that was a lesson learned. My energy level has pretty much returned to normal if not better but at the end of the day I am still really tired. My day is pretty full with work, the kids, errands and my boyfriend. It is getting a lot easier though. I have been shopping and bought a few new items. I said that I wasn't goign to buy much since I know my sizes will be changing but it seems like with my weight loss being a bit slow, I am in one size for a longer period of time. I was actually able to bring some of my slower clothes out of storage and wear a good bit of them so I was really excited about that. It was like gaining an entire new wordrobe again. I am hoping that I won't be in them too long though. lol Well I guess that is it for now. I do have to say before I go that this surgery is not a walk in the park. There are a lot of hard battles to face but I would not change one thing about it and I would do it again in a heartbeat. There has never been a time in my life that I have lost almost 40lbs in 2 months, never. I would like to thank my family and friends that have been there supporting me through this. I could not have done it without you.
12-3-06Mini milestone, my BMI is now under 40. It is 39 to be exact. I was very happy to see that today and thought I would share. I hope everyone had a great weekend.
12-21-06I am sorry once again for taking so long to update. With it being the holiday season things are so busy right now I just haven't had a chance. I still come to this site all the time and read the posts on the message board but I have not taken the time to put my thoughts into words on my profile.
For starters my weight. I am 12 weeks out and I have lost a total of 39% of my excess body weight which is 44 lbs. I am really proud of my accomplishments so far. My clothes fit much better and a lot of them are too big. I have actually been able to go into a regular store and buy a few things. New York & Co is one of my favorite stores. They sell these pants that have a lot of give in them and before I could squeeze into an XL but now I can comfortably fit into a Large. That is really nice.
As for my eating and how I feel I am great. I have discovered I am a dumper so I can not have large amounts of surgar or concentrated sugar. I can have some things in moderation but I have to really watch the surgar content of what I eat. Other than that I can pretty much eat what I want, in moderation of course. I have tried a variety of different foods and nothing besides the sugar has really made me sick. Physically I feel great. My energy level has returned to normal and exceeded it. I have more of a pep in my step and I feel good most of the time. There are times when I get a little slugish but that usually happens if I don't eat or if I eat the wrong things.
I have not regrets at all about my decision to have this surgery. It is really making positive changes in my life and in how I feel about myself. I wish everyone the best in their journey. I will update soon.
12-29-06Well I made it through Christmas. I did pretty well actually. We went to my daddys house and all of my family that lives in the area was there. Several of them made comments about how I looked. My aunt and SIL both asked me what my secret was. I didn't say anything about my surgery though. I just didn't want to make that the center of conversation at Christmas dinner.
I have now lost 47 lbs which is 41% of my excess body weight. I have my 3 month follow up appointment next week so I am anxious to see what the DR has to say about my progress and about my labs. I know I am not getting enough protein but I am working on it everyday. I just don't eat enough to get in 60 grams per day and I have not found a suppliment that I like that does not make me sick.
I have been in a few "regular" stores and been able to buy a few things. My stomach is still really big but everything else is getting smaller. I have not been brave enough to post any pictures yet but I think I will soon.
Everyone take care and have a great New Year.
1-21-07I hope this post finds everyone well and in good spirits. I am a little over 3 1/2 months post op and I have lost 56 lbs. Exactly half of what I would like to lose. 50% at not quite 4 months out is just fine with me. I go through these periods where I don't lose anything for about a week or 2 and then I will drop 8-10 lbs. It is crazy how that works.
One thing I would like to address is the way people will treat you. I just went through a very painful breakup and I believe a lot of it had to do with my weight loss. I just want everyone to know that you have to have a strong relationship and your partner has to truly support you in everyway. I hope no one has to go through what I did just to be a healthier, happier person.
2-4-07It is early Sunday morning and I am sitting here trying to decide what to have for breakfast. I can remember before surgery I would just go look in the kitchen and whatever looked good I would have. Now, I won't even consider something unless it is full of protein. I usually have eggbeaters or eggs and some type of meat but today I think I will have some chicken salad. I am now 4 months and 1 week out from surgery and I have lost %52 of my excess body weight, at total of 59 lbs. I am realy happy in my decision to have this surgery but it is hard. The mental battle is the hardest because sometimes I feel so abnormal. I remember one day I forgot for a moment that I had surgery, I was at work and someone bought cookies in. Just out of habit I picked up one and at it. Then the panic set it when I got so sick. I dumped so bad and I was at work so that made it worse. That makes it hard sometimes because it is not like you are on a diet and you can cheat every once in a while and have a cookie. With this surgery if you cheat your body will let you know. I guess that is what I need to keep myself in line. I will update again soon.
3-5-07This month has been really stressful for me in my personal life. I never thought that life would treat you the way that it does some times. As far as my progress goes I have only lost 2 more pounds since my last post. That's right 2 lbs. That takes my total to 61 lbs. I am hoping that the scales start moving again and that life eases up on me a little bit. I will post again soon.
9-27-07 It is my 1 year anniversary today. I have not reached my goal but I am well on my way. This last year has been one of many changes. Physical and emotional. With the physical changes came emotional ones but all in all today I am a much happier and healthier person. I am having a problem with my iron levels but I am working on that. For those that are considering WLS I say do your homework and then get ready for the ride of your life. It is by no means easy but it is well worth every struggle and battle you may face. This is a time when you must think of yourself. I would like to thank all of my family and friends that stood by me through this time. I love you all.
