kago16

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

I walked a 5k in 53mins yesterday! im so tired and sore now...just wanted to note it and ill talk more about it later

Im up doing nothing...bored as hell. but cant sleep. i shouldnt have had that iced coffee this evening. blah blah blah lol...thats how i feel. i wish i would just fall asleep...im just up thinking of shit that i dont need to be worrying bout nd getting depressed :(

So im totally feeling this guy in one of my classes. Hes really nice and we are friends. we have been spending alot of time talking and hanging out lately. I was excited at first thinking oh the possibilities....however i soon realized i was still the fat friend! Yuck!

I know he likes me but just as a friend. i mean we been spending alot of time and he feels really comfortable with me so he tells me bout alot of things. Anyway so he started telling me about this girl he likes. i was so pissed. anyway but like a good friend i paid attention :( 

Im sick of being the fat friend!

Im lonely and want someone to be with. Im looking for a good man. The problem isnt really that i havnt been meeting ppl....but the guys that are intrested in me just are not cutting it! lol....or they are angels at first and turn out to be a complete ASS

Ok couple friends feel like im too picky. I dont think so...but ive heard them out but the loud voice is still telling me im right.

ive never been the one to just be with someone just for sex, emotional stability/dependancy, money or whatever it else it maybe....to me dating is like seeing if that person could be your future life partner. Well why date someone who i already know i dont see being with 6mo down the line let alone marrying. 

For example...I dont like the smell of cigarettes, cigars or anything else that is smoked (if your a smoker..no offense just my personal prefrence). Anyway so if i learn a guy im intrested in smokes...thats it. Why? well its not gonna work. like i said i dont like anything smoked, the aroma  makes me sick and cant stand being around it  for long periods, so whats the point of still trying to have something with this person when something that is a part of their(proberbly everyday ) life is something i just cant stand.

i mean if i made my self live with it...im already setting my self up not to be happy in the relationship. Beacuse of this some feel im to picky and thats why im alone. 

in some senses i agree. I have adjusted my wants/expectations in certain things however there are still alot of thing that i just wont put up with or bend on.  i belive that letting go of standards i have or dislikes just cause i want a man isnt going to lead to a long lasting happy relationshp either. 

its frustrating beacuse im feeling like either lower my standards or stay single till "the one" comes to find me.

What do you guys think?

This is soooo cute!!!  (FYI- got this from an RNYer ...between pasting i lost her page...so if you come across this...thanks for posting it!)

So far im around fats and oils an average american eats in a year. Can't wait to reach total loss of 2 Bloodhounds!!!! haha ...that will be the day! i dont know what i would do!

So tell me what have you lost?

1 pound = a Guinea Pig
1.5 pounds = a dozen Krispy Kreme glazed donuts
2 pounds = a rack of baby back ribs
3 pounds = an average human brain
4 pounds = an ostrich egg
5 pounds = a Chihuahua
6 pounds = a human’s skin
7.5 pounds = an average newborn
8 pounds = a human head
10 pounds= chemical additives an American consumes each year
11 pounds = an average housecat
12 pounds = a Bald Eagle
15 pounds = 10 dozen large eggs
16 pounds = a sperm whale’s brain
20 pounds = an automobile tire
23 pounds = amount of pizza an average American eats in a year
24 pounds = a 3-gallon tub of super premium ice cream
25 pounds = an average 2 year old
30 pounds = amount of cheese an average American eats in a year
33 pounds = a cinder block
36 pounds = a mid-size microwave
40 pounds = a 5-gallon bottle of water or an average human leg
44 pounds = an elephant’s heart
50 pounds = a small bale of hay
55 pounds = a 5000 BTU air conditioner
60 pounds = an elephant’s penis (yep, weights more than his heart!)
66 pounds = fats and oils an average American eats in a year
70 pounds = an Irish Setter
77 pounds = a gold brick
80 pounds = the World’s Largest Ball of Tape
90 pounds = a newborn calf
100 pounds = a 2 month old horse
111 pounds = red meat an average American eats in a year
117 pounds = an average fashion model (and she’s 5’11”)
118 pounds = the complete Encyclopedia Britannica
120 pounds = amount of trash you throw away in a month
130 pounds = a newborn giraffe
138 pounds = potatoes an average American eats in a year
140 pounds = refined sugar an average American eats in a year
144 pounds = an average adult woman (and she’s 5’4”)
150 pounds = the complete Oxford English Dictionary
187 pounds = an average adult man
200 pounds = 2 Bloodhounds
235 pounds = Arnold Schwarzenegger
300 pounds = an average football lineman
400 pounds = a Welsh pony

this was a bad week. came back from spring break and since i didnt do any school work i had to work triple to meet deadlines. im worn out....i need to get it together. ive made bad food choices this week. usually dont eat bread but i was carbing it out this week. i ate bread, mac n cheese, almonds etc.. i was almost clos to 299 but due to my own fault i prob wont hit it this week. 

along with my bad food choices i didnt work out and i didnt keep up with my protein and vitamines. im putting all this out there well beacuse its embarassing and i need to air the dirty laundry and keep my closet clean. new day tomorrow and new outlook. my goal for the upcoming week is to make better food choices, dont snack, take all my vitamines and get in my protein.

Newbies....dont test the waters too much!

im having such a lazy day....i dont feel like doing anything. im home today from school cause i have a paper to finish for my MPA program and i havnt even started that crap. im sick of school ...i wish my spring break was a week longer. 

Its scary to think that law school finals will be in about a mo! OMG....well that the only person that gets me through is jesus and im gonna need him so badly.  this semester has been so surreal....so much stuff going on.

yesterday i felt like there was a little monster in my tummy...that just kept saying feed me feed me! lol. i dont know why i was so dam hungry yesteday.

i am at 303 now. i cant wait to be under 300!!! cant wait i hope i get there by my next surgeons apt. i want to loose 5 or morelbs by then so that even with cloths i can still be under 300!

I havnt posted for a while. Ive been going though alot and decided to not post for a while. I guess im having a good week so i feel like posting...lol. Well its spring break for one and i dont have school!!!!!!!! Im in philly and was supposed to go to AC but that didnt work out cause a friend got sick and the trip got canceled.

Philly has been so much fun. Ive gotton to spend time with friends that i havnt seen in over a yr. i actually noticed a diffrence in how i looked from my pictures this time. i noticed a big diffrence in how i feel. I walked ALOT and didnt get tired...i kept up with everyone and i was so happy about that. 

im just a much healtier person. im not loosing at the stage i would like but im focusing on how im changing as a person and to me thats amazing. i also got to go to a jill scott concert over spring break. it was so much fun. it was my first concert ever! haha. i know. I really enjoyed it. to top it off i actually got to hug her! She was sooo nice and down to earth.  All in all im doing good and seeing the brighter side of things

Im down to 315 which is 55lbs from my highest weight. ppl keep telling me they see the diffrence and even ppl who dont know about the surgery are commenting that i lost some weight. 

I dont see it tho. i mean i feel my cloths being really loose and my ring size bing small...but i dont feel smaller. i see the same fat person stairing back in the mirrow. 315 is alright but i just see how far i have left etc...

i talked about it today in theraphy and my i need to be content with the moment beaucse even if i was down 100lbs or more id still want more. 

One thing that im realizing is how much im still very much accountable of what i eat....that is i still have to make the right decision. its hard beacuse sometimes i want to pick whatever one else is having...but i know better and if i think im not doing as well as i want picking what everyone else is having isnt going to help at all. 

Anyway my point is that i guess i didnt realize how much we are still accountable and in charge of what we eat and dont eat. it frustrates me when some ppl are like oh u had the surgery u can eat anything and still loose weight. i look at them like they are nuts. it also pisses me off beacuse its like.....u dont even understand that im completely accountable for what i choose to eat and not to eat. 

My moms bf got me a treadmill. its huge it hasnt been set up tho. im waiting for my landlord to start feeling better so he can set it up for me. 

in the mean time ill keep on pressing on

I had a LONG day today.... and although I wanted to relax i went to a friends party (i had already promised i was gonna show). 

I am glad i went, i got to meet some new ppl and really enjoyed my self. I got dressed up (which i dont do too often) and i felt so pretty so i took some pics.  As of this morning (after pooing and in the nude...lol TMI ...i know!) i am 321lbs ! .  Its been quite a journey so far, some days good some bad some in the middle but im liking this whole finding my self thing...lol at least right now.

Its almost 4am so im gonna head to bed ...hope i can still get up for chuch tomorrow...uh...later this morning.  

ttyl