acabral08

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Went over to Pacific Grove this weekend to visit my daughter and two grandsons.  We had a great time.  Saturday we went Skateboarding at the school.  I even put on a helmet and hit the hill.   Only twice and I was sitting on the skate board (I am 59 after all).  Now let me tell you, 4 mos ago my butt would never have fit on that board.  But not only did I fit but my 4 yr old grandson rode down with me also.  Soooo much fun.

Then we went and bought a Christmas tree and put it up.  My daughter and I carried the 7 ft tree up the stairs and into the house, got it into the stand and then they decorated it.  So much more I can do that I am grateful for.

Then Sunday we went hiking in the Del Monte Forrest looking for Wild Mushrooms!!  My daughter's friend knew exactly what he was looking for and showed us all the ones that would make us sick or dead.  It was a wonderful couple hours, we climbed mts., made new trails, stepped in deer poop and my dog had a wonderful time too.   Needles to say I slept wonderful that night, but the best part is that I felt great getting up in the morning!!

Life is good.

Hi my OH friends!  Sorry it has been so long since I've written but you know the old saying "time flies..."

I was driving the other day and realized that I could drive and see my lap at the same time..WOW    What a concept.  Another AHA moment.  I went Christmas shopping with my youngest daughter and was trying on some clothes and she said to me, "Isn't this great mom you can try on clothes with US now?"  Yes, life is changing for me in so many ways.

A friend that I hadn't seen since about 1 month after surgery said to me "Wow, look at you, you are a whole different person!"  So why am I not feeling very different?  I mean, I dress better (because I can) I wear makeup and do my hair all the time but still don't FEEL thinner.  I still get depressed, lonely, sad, feel like I don't want to do anything.  So when I read the blogs on here (and I do all the time) where people's lives have changed enormously, they are happy, and going places and doing things.  What am I doing wrong? 

Don't get me wrong, I love the new physical me but what is wrong with the emotional me?  Will I ever jump on the wagon?

Coming back to work was tough!  I enjoyed my 4 days off.  My 4 daughters were home Weds. night and we just got together and visited, laughed, and told stories.  Then Thurs we went to Thanksgiving at my brothers.  It was pretty quiet this year so that was really nice.  Got to visit with everyone for a little bit.  Friday we went to Pacific Grove to celebrate my oldest daughters birthday.  Then Sat we were off to Walnut Creek to help my youngest daughter move from San Jose.  This was a lot of running around but as long as I'm with my girls I'm a happy camper.

Only problems were that I didn't get my vitamins in or most of my water.  So in that breath I am still in the same place:  Unless I am in my work routine I can't seem to monitor myself.  What's up with that??   Sat. when I left the house I had breakfast, then everyone ordered pizza at 6:00 that night.  Needless to say when I got my little piece of pizza I ate it to fast and the pain was crazy!  That was also about the time I remembered to drink some water.

So I am back on schedule now.  I weighed  189 this morning!!!    That is an 81 pound weight loss.  I haven't been in the 180's in 25 years!  I still can't believe it.

Just want to wish everyone a "HAPPY THANKSGIVING"!!    I have been doing realy good.  I still do the same thing where I lose 2-4 pounds then don't lose anything for 2 -3 weeks.  Pretty frustrating but as long as I keep losing I think I can handle it. 

I had a small glass of wine last night.  I sipped it for about 1 1/2 hours and didn't feel anything which made me happy.  I was able to join my friends in a glass of wine. Not get sick nor crazy drunk.  I think the trick was to just sip at it and make it last.

 I will be taking a shrimp appetizer and a sugar free pudding dessert to TG....everyone have a great one!

Went to the beach house over in Santa Cruz this weekend and it was wonderful!   The weather was great on Sat and I walked and walked the beach.  Then:  1.)  I managed to walk up this enormous hill back to the house without stopping.  I used to have to stop several times, walk backwards and thought my lungs were going to explode.  Nope, none of that.  Of course my calves are killing me but that's ok.  2.)  Went to the little outdoor cafe for breakfast and looked at those damn plastic outside chairs with the sides and thought "Oh shit".  But, I not only fit right in there was room to spare!!!    I used to have to hold the sides down with my hands in order to not pick the chair up with me when I stood up.

So all in all the weekend was a validation that I am loosing weight (sometimes my mind is a little unsure) and that I am getting healthier.  I am so glad I had this surgery.

Well I went to Los Angeles to visit my daughter and we had soooo much fun.    We shopped, shopped, and shopped some more!!  All my Christmas shopping is done except for 1 person annnnnddddd....wait for it......I lost 3 pounds in 3 days!!! Yep you read it right I now weigh 192 lbs!!!  OMG HTH did that happen??? 

I don't remember if I told you guys but last week I fell.  Really hard and had to go to the eye dr today because I have been having trouble with floaters and flashes of light in my left eye.  He said something about the retina detaching and to aware if it gets worse.  So I think I'm ok it has staid the same for about 6 days now.  Then after I got back to the office I was having a pain below my left breast and under my rib cage so I guess I should keep an eye on that also.  Anyone have a problem with that?   

Thought you should know that I bought a new bra, yep, 2 sizes smaller around the body but the same cup size.  But gosh it is so much more comfortable.  It actually stays in place instead of scrunching together where my fat rolls are or I guess I should say were. Hehe.

Love you guys and will write more later!!

YES I WEIGHED THIS MORNING AND IT REALLY SAID 195!! 

I had to get on the scale 2 or 3 times to make sure I was reading it correctly.  I mean I have been at 200 for 2 wks now.  I have been trying to figure it out and I don't think I have weighed below 200 for 25 yrs.

I had a food dream the other night.  Dreamed that I was eating some kind of sweet dessert thingy...I was hiding and stuffing it down my throat before anyone saw me eating.  The whole time I was thinking I didn't care that it would make me sick I wanted it anyways and the quilt was overwhelming.

It was so real that when I woke up it took me a minute to get over the quilt.  Then I was feeling very lonely.  Now, I have never said I was lonely before.  I've been alone, by myself, etc. and have always been fine.  All I wanted to do was eat, even a meal ya know with meat and a starch and a veggie?  It is a good thing I have this tool to keep me from gorging myself because that is what I would have done.   Hmmmm, ya think that I was never lonely before because I always had my buddy (food) to keep me company?

Also, just wanted you to know that I can wear boots now!!  Yes, they actually fit over my calves.

Being a loser never felt so good!!

Went to see my NUT today.  First time since surgery and apparently, according to her, the last time.  I was doing ok except...get this...she said I was eating to much protein...what???  So she said to cut out the protein powder in the morning, that's 20g of protein.  She also said that might help the constipation.  My Multi did not have any Iron or Selenium in it so I had to buy new ones annndddd I wasn't getting enough Vitamin D in my Multi or Calcium so I had to buy that also and add 1,000ui per day.  I was taking to much B12 and can take that every other day.  Clear as mud? 

But I think I got it.  I will go home and sort it all out again!  She agreed that I was losing wt on the slow side but that wasn't a bad thing.  So I lied  and told her I didn't really mind losing it slowly because everyone said that it was a good thing to do.  Well, now I am going home and regrouping!!   I will figure out what else I can do to move this along.  I am still weighing 200.  I have lost 70 lbs total and 40 since surgery and I am 10 weeks out.  Actually, when I write it 70 lbs looks really good!!!

Good morning my OH friends!  As you know I did the walk/jog thing the other morning...well I was so sore the next day I could hardly walk.   So the next day I thought I would walk my lunch time mile to "work things out".  Yeah, not a good idea.  By the time I went home I could hardly walk to my car.  I am better today and will be walking on my lunch again today.    Ya know why????  Because I weighed 200 this morning!!!  Wow I guess they are right, you really do need to exercise!!! LOL.

Another goal met...I went to the show and I actually FIT in the chair.  I didn't have to put the arms up or anything.  I didn't even rub thighs with the people next to me.  AHHHH such relief. 

Well, I am right on the edge of onderland.  Didn't think I would be excited about getting there but I am.  I am still feeling wonderful and doing better with my water.

I hope everyone is doing well with their journey and I highly recommend this surgery.  I know how scary it is to make that decision but go for it!

I came to the conclusion last night that I AM sabotaging myself!   By refusing to exercise.  I have a friend that is an aerobics instructor and she has been wonderful.  ANY exercising I have done is because of her.  Most of the time I back out on her and she just hangs in there.  I couldn't figure out why I kept canceling on her I mean I really just made up reasons.  Well last night I sat down and actually thought about it.  Why am I afraid of losing wt?  What will happen? 

Well, I didn't put my body thru this to sabotage my progress.  I got up at 5:00 am and took myself and my puppy to the park for a walk.  It was perfect:  it was still dark, no people, no traffic and I could let my pup run loose and there wasn't anyone around to watch me make a fool of myself as I tried to walk AND jog.  Then I even walked on my break time at work.  Now, I have to tell you I am not a morning person so this is a big a** deal!!

I also have a walking buddy on the OH board.  Her name is Kwinkleman and we are trying to motivate each other.  So far so good.  If I didn't have to be honest with her I don't know that I would be walking at all.   So thank you Kwinkleman!!

Please keep the good vibes coming so I will continue to exercise.  Thanks everyone!