abemmaco4
Time for an update - 4/22/10
Apr 22, 2010
Today is my birthday! Hard to believe I weighed 7 lbs 15 ozs at one time. Even harder to believe the changes in my life in the last 4 1/2 years. Most of my journey has been just wonderful and motivating. Some have been learning how to live a different life in a different body.
The "good" parts of my journey are:
. I lost 150 lbs.
. I'm no longer diabetic and my BP and cholesterol are normal.
. I was able to discontinue 8 medications, including 100+ units of insulin a day.
. I don't snore anymore.
. My looks have changed so much that some of my best friends don't recognize me.
. I had several reconstructive surgeries and with each one my self-esteem has been boosted.
. For the first time EVER I can shop in the normal sizes and can wear sizes 9-10 most of the time.
. My opinion of plastic surgery being for vain people has changed. I now view it as a necessity for someone who loses so much weight.
. Being responsible enough to fight through the demons to be able to have my WLS.
. I haven't heard the comments "but you are so clean" or "you have such a beautiful face" - better to say nothing at all, folks!
. That my 5 grandchildren don't remember me fat. It's been great to hold them on my lap.
. That for the first time in years I feel like my sons and husband can be proud of me in public and not embarrassed.
. I went to my 40 year reunion as the person (again) who has changed the most......only this time I was among the smallest in my class!
The "not so good" parts of my journey are:
. I've gained 25 lbs back.
. I have learned that GB is just a tool and not a full ride ticket to a smaller life forever.
. I have learned to accept compliments and to truly believe they are compliments.
. I've enjoyed the second glances from men and how they open the door for me, talk to me on the elevators, and look at me as I see them look at thinner, younger women.
. I've realized that I am an addict and an emotional/stress eater. I wish I could find the answer for those.
. I realize this is a life-long battle and that I still can't take "diet" out of my vocabulary.
. I know now who are my true friends and who are not.
. This one blows me away......I found out that some people become so jealous of the attention I get that they have my life miserable at work and on-line.
. That life goes on - still have family and personal difficulties. That people still live and die.
. When my new clothes won't button.
As I write this today, this will be the last time I can say "I'm in my 50's". I don't feel 59 and I can't imagine turning 60 in 2011. The good part is that we are retiring in 2011 and I can't wait.
Looking into the future, I feel I'm supposed to "do" something with my weight loss adventure. I love to speak to groups and tell my story. That would be something that I would love to do. God has led me thus far.
The last 4 1/2 years have been interesting to live but looking back I've climbed many mountains and that some medications that I got to quit, I've had to add new ones to maintain. Including the actual GB surgery 12/15/05, I've had 7 surgeries in 4 1/2 years. I've lost my brother and mother to deaths, 2 of my biggest supporters of WLS. I've learned how to handle flirting but haven't figured out how to handle snide remarks about my weight loss. I've begun having anxiety attacks which now I take Lexapro for. I've had more stressful experiences that I have my little yellow pills for and take to keep me acting "normal". I know that God's hand has been in my every mood and experience in the last years and that there is a reason for all of it. Some of the reasons I see unfold in front of me, some I'm still waiting to see "why". Not once have I regretted the physical transformation - would do ALL of it again tomorrow if necessary. Since I've gained some of my weight back I worry about failing again. If I dwell on it I get depressed. I have failed at weight loss my whole life - please God, don't let me fail at this one!
Thanks to whoever who added a place to "journal" our feelings. Even if no one reads this, I feel like I've expresssed something that I needed to. I hope all on OH website reach their goals and live a healthier, happier life.
........Vicki
0 comments
The "good" parts of my journey are:
. I lost 150 lbs.
. I'm no longer diabetic and my BP and cholesterol are normal.
. I was able to discontinue 8 medications, including 100+ units of insulin a day.
. I don't snore anymore.
. My looks have changed so much that some of my best friends don't recognize me.
. I had several reconstructive surgeries and with each one my self-esteem has been boosted.
. For the first time EVER I can shop in the normal sizes and can wear sizes 9-10 most of the time.
. My opinion of plastic surgery being for vain people has changed. I now view it as a necessity for someone who loses so much weight.
. Being responsible enough to fight through the demons to be able to have my WLS.
. I haven't heard the comments "but you are so clean" or "you have such a beautiful face" - better to say nothing at all, folks!
. That my 5 grandchildren don't remember me fat. It's been great to hold them on my lap.
. That for the first time in years I feel like my sons and husband can be proud of me in public and not embarrassed.
. I went to my 40 year reunion as the person (again) who has changed the most......only this time I was among the smallest in my class!
The "not so good" parts of my journey are:
. I've gained 25 lbs back.
. I have learned that GB is just a tool and not a full ride ticket to a smaller life forever.
. I have learned to accept compliments and to truly believe they are compliments.
. I've enjoyed the second glances from men and how they open the door for me, talk to me on the elevators, and look at me as I see them look at thinner, younger women.
. I've realized that I am an addict and an emotional/stress eater. I wish I could find the answer for those.
. I realize this is a life-long battle and that I still can't take "diet" out of my vocabulary.
. I know now who are my true friends and who are not.
. This one blows me away......I found out that some people become so jealous of the attention I get that they have my life miserable at work and on-line.
. That life goes on - still have family and personal difficulties. That people still live and die.
. When my new clothes won't button.
As I write this today, this will be the last time I can say "I'm in my 50's". I don't feel 59 and I can't imagine turning 60 in 2011. The good part is that we are retiring in 2011 and I can't wait.
Looking into the future, I feel I'm supposed to "do" something with my weight loss adventure. I love to speak to groups and tell my story. That would be something that I would love to do. God has led me thus far.
The last 4 1/2 years have been interesting to live but looking back I've climbed many mountains and that some medications that I got to quit, I've had to add new ones to maintain. Including the actual GB surgery 12/15/05, I've had 7 surgeries in 4 1/2 years. I've lost my brother and mother to deaths, 2 of my biggest supporters of WLS. I've learned how to handle flirting but haven't figured out how to handle snide remarks about my weight loss. I've begun having anxiety attacks which now I take Lexapro for. I've had more stressful experiences that I have my little yellow pills for and take to keep me acting "normal". I know that God's hand has been in my every mood and experience in the last years and that there is a reason for all of it. Some of the reasons I see unfold in front of me, some I'm still waiting to see "why". Not once have I regretted the physical transformation - would do ALL of it again tomorrow if necessary. Since I've gained some of my weight back I worry about failing again. If I dwell on it I get depressed. I have failed at weight loss my whole life - please God, don't let me fail at this one!
Thanks to whoever who added a place to "journal" our feelings. Even if no one reads this, I feel like I've expresssed something that I needed to. I hope all on OH website reach their goals and live a healthier, happier life.
........Vicki
Where I stand on August 19, 2009
Aug 19, 2009
I just passed my 3 1/2 year mark since my GB. Getting the 150 lbs off was relatively easy - they say the first year is the honeymoon stage. I never thought I would have any trouble maintaining the weight loss. I'm not sure why I fooled myself in that I've never been able to keep the weight off in the past. I'm not saying that I've gained all my weight back but I have gained 25 lbs back and I fear that it'll keep going upward if I don't get a grip. I'm hoping in writing this that I'll hold myself accountable and seeing it in writing will keep me accountable.
I am a stress/emotional eater. I never realized how bad I was until the last 1-2 years. I'm normally a very upbeat person with a positive attitude. I'm still positive but I'm finding it harder to be upbeat. About 2 years ago I started having anxiety attacks, something I've never had before. My doctor pointed out to me that I've gone through several big events since my GB surgery. I've had 5 surgeries since my GB surgery, have lost my brother and am about to acknowledge the 1 year death of my mother. Work has been horrible for the last year because of a coworker. God answered that prayer and she was laid off about 2 months ago. One thing that we weren't warned about losing all this weight is that you begin having experiences you've not had to deal with in a LONG time, if ever. I've found that not everyone is happy about your weight loss. Some people who wanted nothing to do with you previously, now want to be your friend. Others are jealous of the attention drawn to you and your fete. Men begin openly staring and sometimes flirting. I haven't had that happen in a long, long time. While it's flattering, I've still had to relearn how to handle that. I've been happily married for 40 years. Luckily, my husband isn't jealous and is kind of proud when I get second glances.
I'm really not sure why I'm writing all of this as I expect no one will read it. I guess it's good therapy for me. If anyone does read this, I would be interested if you're finding it hard to keep the weight down to your goal weight. In 1980 I had my stomach stapled, lost 96 lbs and gained back 150 within 2 years. I worry that might happen again. I'm looking for any kind of secret you may have to get back in control with myself.
I just went through all the before and after pictures which makes me proud of what you've done and what WLS has done for the masses of morbidly obese people. Our lives have been given back to us, only better than before.
Hopefully, I'll use my blog to use as a sounding board. I already feel better having written this. Good luck with your weight loss journeys.
Vicki
0 comments
I am a stress/emotional eater. I never realized how bad I was until the last 1-2 years. I'm normally a very upbeat person with a positive attitude. I'm still positive but I'm finding it harder to be upbeat. About 2 years ago I started having anxiety attacks, something I've never had before. My doctor pointed out to me that I've gone through several big events since my GB surgery. I've had 5 surgeries since my GB surgery, have lost my brother and am about to acknowledge the 1 year death of my mother. Work has been horrible for the last year because of a coworker. God answered that prayer and she was laid off about 2 months ago. One thing that we weren't warned about losing all this weight is that you begin having experiences you've not had to deal with in a LONG time, if ever. I've found that not everyone is happy about your weight loss. Some people who wanted nothing to do with you previously, now want to be your friend. Others are jealous of the attention drawn to you and your fete. Men begin openly staring and sometimes flirting. I haven't had that happen in a long, long time. While it's flattering, I've still had to relearn how to handle that. I've been happily married for 40 years. Luckily, my husband isn't jealous and is kind of proud when I get second glances.
I'm really not sure why I'm writing all of this as I expect no one will read it. I guess it's good therapy for me. If anyone does read this, I would be interested if you're finding it hard to keep the weight down to your goal weight. In 1980 I had my stomach stapled, lost 96 lbs and gained back 150 within 2 years. I worry that might happen again. I'm looking for any kind of secret you may have to get back in control with myself.
I just went through all the before and after pictures which makes me proud of what you've done and what WLS has done for the masses of morbidly obese people. Our lives have been given back to us, only better than before.
Hopefully, I'll use my blog to use as a sounding board. I already feel better having written this. Good luck with your weight loss journeys.
Vicki
About Me
McKinney, TX
Location
25.0
BMI
Surgery
12/15/2005
Surgery Date
Jan 17, 2008
Member Since
