Mary Ellen
On 9/23/03 - I was on blood pressure medication, anti-depressants, a water pill, medication to prevent gout, and using a C-Pac machine to sleep at night. I had sleep apnea and when tested was found to stop breathing 91 times an hour for a total of 31 minutes and my oxygen saturation level went down to 52%. My legs were swollen, infected and I had to wear prescription compression stockings that had to be special ordered because of the size and shape of my legs. I snored so loudly it woke my daughter up in the next room and we both had our bedroom doors shut. By that time I had already had my gall bladder removed and had a 1 inch kidney stone shattered and I was only 51 years old but my weight was close to 400 pounds and I had already lost some weight.
9/23/03 I had gastric bypass surgery performed by Dr. Glen Moore of the Tidewater Surgical Group and it basically saved my life. Within 3-4 weeks I was off the C-Pac machine and sleeping through the night without waking my family.
The week of Halloween I watched 2 and 1/2 year old twins. We played with trucks, blocks and played outside. I must admit when they went down for their afternoon nap, I was ready for a rest but I understand that is normal. The main thing was I could keep up with them and play with them.
Before my surgery it took me 6 hours to walk from the entrance to Busch Gardens in Williamsburg to Ireland and back. I had to stop because of my legs and because I was short of breath. The last night Busch Gardens was open in 2003 we went up and I walked from the entrance to the Festhaus in Germany only stopping once. Then we walked back from Germany to the entrance when the park was closing and I only had to stop once to catch my breath. I basically walked around the entire park taking time out to have dinner and watch several shows in under 4 hours - quite a change from earlier this summber.
By the middle of November, I was off my anti-depressants and my blood pressure medication.
When the holiday season started the presents from the surgery kept coming. My daughter and Dad asked what I wanted for Christmas and I told them nothing - I had received my Christmas present in September.
Thanksgiving Day we went to Coleman's Nursery to see the Winter Wonderland as is the tradition for my family. For the first time in years, I was able to actually look at the winter scenes - not quickly walk through and find a bench to sit down and wait for my family.
When we went to Lynnhaven Mall I mentioned that the mall had new decorations - my daughter informed me they were not new - I had not been able to walk through the mall to see the decorations the past few years. I was able to walk through MacArthur Mall and look at everything, like a kid in a candy store.
This year I was able to go Christmas shopping. Previous years I would sit on a bench and my daughter would go in the stores and then come tell me what was there and I would tell her what to buy for me. This year I went in the stores, looked around, picked up items to see if it was what I wanted and then purchased the item or went to another store.
I was able to decorate my house for the holidys. Everyone would say "but you always decorate". My answer was "no, my daughter decorated the house". For the past few years I would sit on the couch and she would bring me the boxes and I would unpack and tell her where the things went. I would then sit beside the table or stand and arrange the decorations. This year I would unpack the decorations, but I would also walk over and place or hang the decoration.
For years I would not make stuffed cabbage because "it took too long". This year I made stuffed cabbage and admitted the reason I would not make it before is I could not stand for the 2 to 3 hours required to make it properly. It is a traditional holiday dish in my family and this year we had stuffed cabbage for Christmas Dinner.
Between Christmas and New Year my brother and my 13 year old nephew came for a visit and since they are from a small town in PA we went to see the ships and the planes. The last time my nephew was here was Sept. 2001 and we went to the air show at Oceana. My Dad has a handicap sticker so we parked in handicap parking and walked through the gate. I found a spot in the shade where I would be able to see the events of the air show while my family walked around and went through the planes on display. My legs and breathing would not allow me to go with them. This year I walked to all the planes on display at NOB and Oceana and if there was no sign stating "Do Not Climb on Aircraft" I was right along with my nephew climbing the planes.
One evening I was peeling potatoes sitting on a stool in my kitchen, my daughter came up to me and gave me a hug. She reacted like something was wrong and when I asked her what was wrong she replied, "nothing, you have lost weight and I can get closer to you than I could before".
Other things I can now do include:
1. Sit in a booth at a restaurant - no longer do we have to wait for a table.
2. I went for a bone density test and the technician did not have to check if the machine could handle my weight.
3. When I went for a blood test the arm rest came down like it was suppose to for my arm to rest on while the technician drew the blood.
4. Get a massge or facial without my arms hanging off the table.
5. Go to a movie and walk up the steps to get a seat.
6. Sit comfortably in the seat at the theater or at a concert - I took a friend's daughter to see the Vienna Boys Choir for Christmas and was able to sit in my seat without constantly moving to be confortable.
7. Use the seat belt in my car without it cutting into my chest.
8. Go grocery shopping and not have to take a break half-way through shopping because I was too hot and sweating and had to sit down.
9. Being able to go to a late movie - I am not exhausted from a normal day at work.
10. Being able to clean my own house - my Dad hired a house keeper to clean twice a month because I physically could not clean our house.
11. Raising the seat of my chair at work and not having it go down when I sit in it.
The organization where I worked recently had their Annual All Staff Meeting. I made a special effort to look my best that day and from what I understand when I walked in to the meeting, it caused quite a commotion. People who have known me for almost 18 years did not recognize me. The reason it was important for me to make that good of an impression with people I have known and worked with for 18 years is before my surgery I learned that the top management had been told that I was not promotable due to my helth. I think that has been proven wrong.
Some of the things I look forward to doing this summer:
1. Riding the roller coaters at the amusement parks - I will be able to sit in the seats now with the safety bar securely in place.
2. Riding the roller coasters that turn you upside down - I will no longer have to worry if the shoulder harness will fail because of my weight.
3. Visiting my good friends in Minnesota - I will be able to take a plane to visit her.
4. Visiting my friend in GA without having to drive 10 hours -I will be able to fly.
5. Enjoying activities outside - not having to stay inside because I was too heavy to even be out in a little heat.
6. Learn how to County Line Dance and Ballroom Dancing
My surgery was originally scheduled on a Wednesday early September 2003. When I went for my pre-op appointment the Monday before my surgery, Dr. Moore reviewed my tests and advised me that my surgery would have to be postponed; I had an abnormality on my EKG. I broke down in his office and offered to sign any kind of release just so he would do the surgery. He told me that additional tests would be scheduled and depending on their results the surgery could be rescheduled. Dr. Moore said that they wanted to be absolutely certain that everything was okay before going into surgery, they were looking out for my safety. On the way to my primary care doctor's office to get the additional tests scheduled my thoughts turned to this "If I did not trust Dr. Moore to look out for my safety before surgery, how could I trust him to do the surgery." From that point on any fear I had about having the surgery was gone - I HAD A DOCTOR WHO PUT MY SAFETY FIRST.
All of us have lost the weight several times but it always comes back plus more. This time I have proof the weight will stay off - the proof are the members of my support group who had the surgery 2, 3 and more years ago and they have not gained the weight back!
In talking with my close friends and in being truthful with myself I believe if I had not had this surgery - I would not have been here for this past holiday season.
March 1, 2004
February was a month of ups and downs.
For the first time in years when I went to my primary care doctor for a sinus infection, I DID NOT HAVE BRONCHITIS nor did I have any wheezing.
My daughter, dad and I went to the circus and I could sit and move in the seat comfortably. During the circus the clowns started doing the "hand jive" so I tried doing it. My daughter was laughing at me because she had to show me how - I had forgotten. She made the comment that wasn't it ironic that I grew up closer to the time when that was popular but she was having to show me how it went. I told her to remember that it had been a long time since I had done anything like that. In the past I didn't want people looking at me doing something crazy (fun) like that and laughing at the "fat" lady trying to do the "hand jive".
I can now sit in a chair and turn around to talk to someone behind me and actually turn my whole body in the chair not just twisting at my waist.
I recently noticed that when I walk my thighs do not rub together. A co-worker and I have started walking at lunch. Last year at this time I was not able to walk from our office to a little restaurant that is not even a block away. The first day we walked, we walked 5 times that distance and I was able to carry on a conversation the entire time. Each week we increase the distance and my co-worker asked me today if I wanted to walk in the "Relay for Life" in May!
My daughter started teaching me some country line dances and was so sure I would have to take a lot of breaks because my legs could not handle the exercise or I would be out of breath. But instead of me wanting to take a break it was her friends (half my age) needing to stop to take a break.
I have had a couple of times at restaurants where I was upset. We went to a Mexican restaurant and I got upset because I could not order like I use to. I ordered what I could eat but was not happy. Later that night I had to remind myself that if I had not had the surgery, I still would not have been able to eat what I wanted at the restuarant because I would not have been here. Another time I wanted a bite of my daughter's cheesecake. Of course, she reminded me I could not have cheesecake since it was very sweet and I had to remind myself that I don't even like cheesecake.
Today, I interviewed for a different position where I work which would be a promotion for me. Whether or not I get the job, at least I had the self-confidence to try for the position. The receptionist in the building where the interview was held, whom I have known for 3 years and in fact taught her some of her "foundation" courses, did not recognize me when I showed up for the interview. When I told her my name, she made the comment I know someone with your same name and even commented that this other person had taught her some of her "foundation" courses when she was hired. She did
not believe me when I told her it was me. Another person had to tell her it was me and she still did not believe it until I pulled out a picture of what I looked like 2 years ago.
Several people have mentioned that I am a different person and that upsets me. I tell them I am the same person that I have always been, just now I can actually be myself without fear of people laughing at me because I was "fat".
My support group had to cancel our February meeting due to bad weather. I look forward to our meeting in March to help deal with the comments of others.
March 3, 2004
This morning, for the first time, in I can't even remember the number of years, I am able to wear a gold cross on a fine chain given to me by my uncle when I was born 52 years ago. This morning I also tried on a necklace that my mother bought me before she died, that I was never able to wear because the chain was too small (and I refused to buy another one) and I can wear it now.
April 1, 2004
My co-worker and I continue walking at lunch only now it has changed into power walking. The distance we walked less than 2 months ago and took us 30 minutes now takes us 12 minutes. Yesterday a co-worker/friend came up to me and said that she had seen me out walking at lunch and it took her a few minutes to realize it was me. She made the comment "you were walking".
My walking partner and I are signed up to walk in the "Relay for Life" in May! This is quite an accomplishment for someone who could barely walk in May, 2003.
I was also able to get down on my hands and knees and play cars with one of the 3 year old twins my daughter is a part-time nanny for. Last night we played ring-around-the rosie for almost 30 minutes and I could even fall down and get back up. Something I wasn't able to do much when my own daughter was little.
Another co-worker saw me in the hallway and told me at first he did not recognize me (We have known each other for 17 years). It was "casual day" so I was wearing a pair of blue jeans and a sweater. I can now wear regular blue jeans that are a size 18, size 18 skirts and even some a size 16, tops are now normally an extra large whereas before a size 4X was getting too tight. My shoe size has gone from being able to fit in some size 10WW to an 8 1/2 W. I am at 70% of my weight loss goal.
At the gym to which I belong, I can now keep up with the water aerobics instructor. Something I have never been able to do! This week I have started working out with the free weights. My next goal is to be able to do a floor aerobics class. After a shower, I can now wrap up in a towel like most of the other ladies at the gym. Something I have never been able to do!
I have started going out more with my friends. I am not as self-conscious when I walk into a place by myself to meet them. Before I would want to meet them somewhere then go where we had planned because I did not want to walk in by myself.
After the Support Group Meeting in March I had Melody take my picture. I could not believe it! I told Melody and Lisa I know I never saw myself as big as I was before my surgery but I did not see myself as I was in the picture. I am sure it will take some time but eventually my image of myself and what others see will be the same. Especially with the support of people like Dr. Moore, Lisa, Melody and all the staff at their offices and members of our support group and my close friends.
Last but not least, the position I applied for in February, I got. It is a promotion and I start my new position April 19th. It goes along with the changes happening in my life.
Each month continues with wonderful changes all due to my surgery and what it has enabled me to do again - experience and enjoy life! Thank You Dr. Moore and Staff!
April 13, 2004
Opening night for the Norfolk Tides was April 8th; it was cold and we lost but other than that it was a great night. I HAVE NEVER BEEN CALLED SKINNY IN MY LIFE BUT THE OPENING NIGHT OF BASEBALL SEASON I WAS CALLED SKINNY! People did not believe it was me until they heard my voice. We always sit on the concourse because my dad has a pacemaker. We have been going to this ballpark since it opened and this is the 11th season. During all that time I have never been able to sit in my seat and prop my feet up on the railing in front of me for more than a minute or two because my legs would start to hurt. That night I was able to prop my feet up on the middle bar for most of the game and was comfortable. I was able to walk to the different concession stands and stand in the lines for our food and my legs did not hurt nor did I get tired, nor did I have to lean on anything while in line. I was able to walk up the steps from the first floor to the concourse without my legs hurting or getting out of breath. For the first time in years I did not have to take the elevator. We went to another game on Saturday and there was a rain delay and I was able to prop my feet up on the top railing and slouch down in my seat without my legs hurting.
I went to a movie at the base theater (does not have stadium seating) and after sitting down in my seat made the comment "I feel small sitting in this seat". For the first time all of me actually fit in the seat with a little room to spare.
My daughter and I went shopping for an Easter outfit for her. We saw an outfit made out of a material that stretches which I love, and I asked about getting her the outfit. Her comment was no, because she had tried on an outfit made out of the material before and it showed the bulges she had in the wrong places and it did not look right on her. When I was at my heaviest a lot of my clothes were made from this material and I told her "I use to wear most of my clothes made out of that material and I looked nice (at least I thought I did). She replied "you did look nice mom, but no offense, you did not have bulges". I asked her what she meant - did she mean I was one big blob with no bulges. She replied "don't want to hurt your feelings, but you had no small bulges, you were one big bulge."
My dad had an appointment for an x-ray last week and I took him to the hospital and we walked from the main entrance to Radiology. Once we got to Radiology I remember thinking that before I use to think it was such a long distance and would have to stop and rest at least once. That day I thought the distance was not far at all and did not have to stop even once.
Last night I went to a friend's house who I have not seen since January. I had told her the amount of weight I had lost since I had seen her last so it would not be such a big shock. When she opened the door she could not believe it. She had to take a picture so she could show her family. She has been one of my biggest supporters and understands the changes that I have gone through.
She has two small boys and I was able to play trains, cars and even some indoor basketball with them. Their playroom is downstairs and I was able to walk down and then back up the steps with no problem!
Easter Sunday I did something I had thought about doing before but never had the nerve because someone as large as I was would have been laughed. I GOT MY PICTURE TAKEN WITH THE EASTER BUNNY!
May 5, 2004 - I went for my follow up appointment with Dr. Moore on April 22 and continue to be on schedule with my weight loss. I have lost 75% of my projected weight loss which is 162 pounds, that leaves 50 pounds to go.
Yesterday morning was a first for me - I went into my daughter's closet to borrow some clothes to wear.
Walking into the building at work this past week I saw my reflection in the window and was surprised to see you could actually tell I had a waist! You know how some poeple can put one hand in the other behind their back and stand, something I could never do before, now I can. Sunday at church I realized I had been able to kneel and stand during the mass , again something I had not been able to do for quite some time; I can now do that. I can also go by people in the pew without them having to move out of the pew to let me get to my seat, just like everyone else.
At the gym my workout program is now "on the floor" and I am using some weights. I can now walk the double the distance that originally took me 30 minutes during lunch in 20 minutes. So my energy and stamina are increasing. Can't wait to go to Busch Gardens.
More and more I am trying different types of food, staying within the parameters of no fried foods, no sugar and foods low in fat. My main problem now is if the food is dry. I can even eat some of the food at the baseball park. Life is good!
May 9, 2003 Mother's Day - When we were sitting in church before mass this morning a lady came up to me and put her arm around my shoulder and she told me "You look beautiful, have a
Happy Mother's Day". I said thank you and when she went back to her seat starting thinking and got tears in my eyes. It was the week after Mother's Day last year that my legs became so bad it started me on the path to having the bypass surgery. It was this time of year, a year ago, that my legs became
swollen, infected, turned purple and I could barely walk.
My daughter has to work today until 4:00pm and she was upset because this is the first Mother's Day she has had to work and we could not go out for Sunday Dinner at noon like we normally do instead we will be going out for Sunday Dinner when she gets off work. Something I am certain we would not be doing had I not had the surgery last September. I am positive without the surgery I would not be alive today to celebrate Mother's Day or any day. Without the surgery I am certain if my daughter wanted to visit me on Mother's Day this year it would have been at my grave.
Next Sunday, my family celebrates Kid's Day. Something we have been doing since my daughter was 2 years old. Again another holiday we would not be able to celebrate if I had not had the surgery because since I am the only parent my daughter has, how could you have Kid's Day without a parent?
06/07/04 - Kid's Day went well. My daughter is now 24 so we have been celebrating it for 22 years. Last weekend I went shopping at a department store and was actually able to purchase items on clearance that fit. But the best part was when I went to pay for my items I wrote a check. The clerk asked for ID and when I gave her my driver's license she did not believe it was me. I had to show her additional identification and she even called over another clerk before she would accept my check.
I am now down to 215 pounds (40 more pounds to go)and cannot get use to people telling me I am skinny and people telling me I am beautiful - I have never been told I was skinny in my life. Most people if they told me I was pretty would normally add even though I needed to lose weight. Co-workers now tell me the only way they can sometimes recognize me (especially on Friday when we can wear blue jeans to work) is by my red hair.
I did find out that you cannot believe it when a some restaurants say they have sugar free items. I tried a sugar free cookie at one restaurant and got sick.
We bought our season passes for Busch Gardens this past weekend and I can't wait until we go up on Father's Day and ride the roller coasters. Something I have not been able to do for years; one because I could barely walk last year and two, because I could not fit in the seats.
Tim McGraw has a new song out that I just heard bits and pieces of today. It is about what his father did when he found out he was dying and had a limited time to live. I think I will adopt that as my theme song. Since my surgery, and being given my second chance at life, I try not to take anything for granted and live life to the fullest each day.
June 14, 2004 - We went to the Tim McGraw concert on Friday and we had lawn seats so of course it had to rain. Because there was a chance it would rain we put plastic on the ground before we put down our blankets. Last year when it rained I still sat on the blanket even though it got soaked-I could not stand for any length of time. Friday, instead on sitting in a puddle of water on the blanket I was able to stand up with the rest of the crowd. I still got soaked, even wearing a poncho, but at least I did not have to sit in a puddle of water. He sang my new theme song "Live Like You Are Dying" which to me means I have been given a second chance, don't take life for granted and live each day to the fullest.
My stamina continues to increase. Saturday we went to a baseball game, then went and walked around Harborfest for 3 hours, then went to the mall for a little shopping and I still had energy to go see the fireworks for Harborfest at 9:30 pm.
Sunday was church, going out for Sunday dinner, a meeting at work, going to the grocery store and company over that night.
Today, June 14 was another marathon day. It was the start of the semi-annual sale for Victoria Secrets. My daughter and I both took the day off and started shopping at 8:00 am this morning and went to every Victoria Secret store in the area and stopped at 5:30 pm. We stopped around noon and had lunch; between stores we even took her car in for an oil change and inspection. When we got home we fixed dinner and had company over for dinner. Two important things for a day like this - the memories we will both have from spending this time together and the fact that this year I was able to do the marathan shopping day (not just one store like in times past) and I was actually able to buy things for me!
Life continues to get better!
July 6, 2004
On Father's Day we went to Busch Gardens and I got to ride the roller coasters! There was no problem with the lap harness fitting properly. I rode Roman Rapids and the bump cars among other rides. Last year everyone had to walk slow for me and we had to take a lot of breaks. This year people were telling me to slow down!
This past week my friend from Minnesota came for a visit and it was the first time she has seen me since my surgery. Her husband meet me in the lobby of the hotel and then we went to there room. When I walked in the door, she did not recognize me. She said she was getting ready to ask her husband who was the lady that Mary Ellen brought with her when I said something and she realized it was me.
My 14 year old nephew was here also for that week also and I was able to keep up with him! When I took him to PA it was the first time I had been back to my home town since my surgery and people did not know me. I was able to do the driving without almost falling asleep - the first time in many years I could do that.
The only bad part is now my skin is starting to sag. But I understand nothing can be done until I have lost all my weight and it gets approved by my insurance company (hopefully). Considering the amount of weight I have lost (180 lbs)it is to be expected.
I still have a difficult time accepting the fact that people tell me I am skinny. I am not afraid of getting my picture taken now but when I see the picture I have a hard time believing it is me. Can you believe there are some people who have told me I do not need to lose any more weight? No one has ever told me that in my entire life. I can't ever remember being this small. My size is now basically a 14 and some of those are getting a little big.
Well hopefully my next stop will be the roller coasters at King's Dominion!
July 31, 2004
Another full month. I was able to purchase and wear a sun dress this month. The skin on my arms looks a little funky but I figure it looks better than the big arms I had last summer and wore sleeveless tops. The good news is that I have been given the go ahead from Dr. Moore to start looking into getting the excess skin removed, so I have an appointment on Monday with a plastic surgeon. Hopefully, because of the the amount of excess skin and the rashes under some of the folds, my insurance will cover the surgery to remove the excess skin.
This month was a month of cravings. I wanted peanuts, Blue Bunny Turtle Surprise (no sugar added) ice cream, strawberries, and watermelon. I wanted to not eat my regular meals and just eat those four items but I knew I could not do that. After about 2 weeks of the cravings and having to eat a little bit of each itme every day I call Lisa King, my nutritionist and we talked about my cravings. She made sure I was not substituting these four items for my regular food and made sure I was still getting my protein, then assured me the cravings would go away. But if they did not go away in a week, we would discuss it further. She was right. About 3 days later, I did not want anymore ice cream, although I still occasionally eat peanuts and still eat strawberries and watermelon if we go somewhere and the two items are there to eat; but I don't get in my car and drive to the store every day to get them any more.
I now have the energy to tackle all the boxes we have stored in the laundry room. There are about 10 boxes from when we moved into the house 17+ years ago that have not been really unpacked and since I want the room painted that is my job this weekend.
My "adopted" children, have asked me to be the Maid of Honor at their wedding next May. Can you imagine that, especially at my age? So after they convinced me I was more worried about the age thing that they were, and they really wanted me to be in their wedding, I told them I would. Something I would have never have agreed to last year at this time.
Last night I went to a Comedy Club with some friends. It was a nice feeling to look around and not be one of the biggest persons in the room. Life continues to be good and I try to follow Tim McGraw's advice "Live Like You Are Dying" - make everyday count!
08/08/04 - Another first this weekend. My daughter and I went to see the musical "Cats" Friday. After the show we went to a nightclub and while there I got asked to dance by someone I did not know. Never in my life have I gone anywhere there was dancing and have someone I did not know come up to me and ask me to dance. Made me feel good about myself.
My appointment on Monday with the plastic surgeon did not go very well. In fact I ended up not seeing them once I went to their office. I have an appointment on August 17th with a different surgeon and am going to call Monday to set up an appointment with a third doctor. Hopefully things will work with one of them.
08/15/04 - Great news - I finally broke the 200 lb mark. On Saturday at the gym I weighed 199 lbs and since Mid-october, 2003 had lost a total of 80 3/4 inches!
9/8/04 - We went to visit my relatives in PA during the last part of August. My aunt and I were meeting my cousin for lunch and I went to see if her car was in the parking lot. When I waved to her in the parking lot, she drove by me because she did not recognize me.
I am on a committee and last night I met with the Director of the department to discuss items regarding the upcoming year. I have known this person for almost 19 years and she had not seen me since last October (we had talked on the phone and communicated via e-mail). She was amazed when she saw me and kept commenting that she recognized my voice but would have passed me up on the street - she had never seen me small.
I went and had a massage this past weekend. I was told I have muscles under the loose skin. The person giving me the massage could even feel my ribs. Something she had never been able to do in the last four years that I have been getting a massage.
One of my goals when I started on my journey was to be able to buy a evening gown. Last night I went shopping with my daughter and bought a gown. The only gown I ever had was in high school when I was in ROTC and we had to go to the Military Ball. My mother and her friend went shopping, bought my gown without me there and that was what I wore to the Military Ball. Other than that I have had long dresses but never an evening gown. The gown is red and beautiful. It was 8:30 pm but I had to go from the store to a friend's house and try it on so she could see what I looked like in the dress. She has two little boys and they both said I looked pretty. My daughter and I will be going to see "Momma Mia" in October and I will wear my red gown.
Life continues to be good to me!
09/12/04 - At our support group this past Thursday I discovered that one of the other people there was having the same problem I am having with the excess skin. It causes us to walk a little bent over due to the weight of the excess skin at our stomach. I realized I had to keep pulling my shoulders back when I walked but did not realize I was walking a little bent over until I went to PA and one of my friends up there mentioned that not only did I look like my mother now, but I even walked like her. Hopefully soon I will have some sort of news from my insurance company as to whether or not they will pay to have the excess skin removed.
In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy my second chance at life. Today was Grandparents Day and my daughter and I took my dad to Busch Gardens. It was a beautiful day!
September 24, 2004
On Wednesday I went to the office at 7:00am for a couple of hours, drove to DC to pick up a friend who now lives in Minnesota and was in DC for a conference, we stopped outside of
DC and had lunch with a mutual friend of ours, drove to Williamsburg Outlets and did shopping, had dinner and then got home around 9:30pm.
Yesterday was my "First Birthday" - I had my surgery a year ago!
My friend is here from Minnesota and we have had a great time.
We left my house at 10:30am and while she had an appointment to keep I went to visit the 3 year old twins and we went for a walk. We skipped, ran and sang songs (we even sang "Ring Around The Rosie" on 21st Street in Ghent) while we walked. Then when I picked up my friend we went for lunch, shopping, drove by her "old" house so she could see what changes the new owners had made to it, went on the American Rover, had dinner, more shopping, went back to my house at 10:00pm and then stayed up until 2:30am watching movies.
Today is my one year appointment with Dr. Moore. What can I say but a big Thank You for another year of living. And most important Thank You to God for putting Dr. Moore and his staff in my life!!
10/06/04
The week end of my "first" birthday continued to be filled with activity. On that Saturday I went to the air show with my brother and his son. This time we got to the air show by 10:30 am and stayed until 5:00pm and I walked the entire time. My nephew and I went on every plane, climbed on the trucks and even shot the machine gun they had on display. After the air show we went for dinner and then went to the ocean front and walked on the beach looking at the sand castles that were built for the contest. Sunday, I went shopping for a pair of shoes for my gown and then went to an outdoor concert that evening.
This past weekend my daughter and I went to see "Momma Mia" and I wore my red evening gown. While getting dressed I remember thinking I felt like Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman" when she was going to the opera. Even sitting at Crysler Hall during intermission, the same thought crossed my mind. I felt like what I imagined Julia Roberts' character had to feel like in her red gown at the opera. Never in my life have I felt like that.
Monday was a continuation of that feeling. After a horrible morning, a friend of mine and I had a "girls night out" and went shoppingt. We went to the mall and when she asked where I liked to shop, I told her I use to shop at JC Penneys and Lane Bryant and would get what fit. Well we went to Hechts and spent over 2 hours in the store. I tried on at least 10 pairs of pants and about 20 tops. For the first time, I had my choice of outfits - again I felt like Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman" when she went on her second shopping trip and bought a whole wardrobe. I only got one outfit, but it was one I picked because I liked it the best not because it was the only one that fit. I don't ever remember being able to do that in my life. What a good feeling it is.
01/09/05 It has been awhile since I updated my profile but a lot has happened. The major item is I had additional surgery to remove the excess skin from my arms. Had a little problem getting insurance to cover the surgery, but my doctors were able to support that the removal of the skin was not for cosmetic reasons. The surgery was December 15th so I am still recovering. All the stitches have been removed and replaced with the "steri-strips". I go back to my surgeon Tuesday and hopefully I will be far enough along in my recover to where I can raise my arms. I cannot remember my arms ever being this small. Prior to surgery I enjoyed my 2nd holiday season being able to walk and enjoy the season. I was finally able to get some pictures of me and sent them to my friend in GA. When she got the pictures she called and she mentioned that in all the years she has know me she does not remember me ever being a small as I am now. We have know each over for over 39 years and she is right, I cannot ever remember being this size.
03/22/05
I can't believe it has been this long since I updated my profile. I am getting ready for surgery on 03/30/05 to remove the excess skin from my stomach and hopefully from my legs. It is hard to believe that it has been 18 months since my surgery and I have lost the weight and kept it off. For the first time in my life I am not regaining the weight I took off.
04/02/05
My surgery was postponed. It is now scheduled for 4/18/05. This is the third date so hopefully the third time will be the charm. It was orginally scheduled for 03/09/05 but it was cancelled due to a death in the family and we had to make a trip to PA. When we were in PA, some of my family actually told me I was beautiful something no one in family in PA has ever told me.
11/15/05
It has been quite some time since I updated my profile. The surgery scheduled for 4/18/05 was done 05/02/05. There were a couple minor setbacks with my recovery but the results were good. I have since had surgery to remove the excess skin off from my legs and at this point all the planned surgeries have been done. I had another summer of being able to enjoy life and this will be my 3rd holiday season of being able to participate in the holiday festivities and not just be a bystander.
In August I flew to NH to see a friend of mine. Sitting in the plane seat on the way back home I remember thinking I am a normal person, I can fit comfortably in the seat.
06/10/06
Life only gets better. My energy level continues to be high. In May we went down to Orlanda, Florida and we covered 7 different theme parks in 6 days and one theme park we went to twice making it 8 parks in 6 days. Since we had a late flight the day we left, we went shopping before we went to the airport our flight arrived home at 12:30 am and I was at work in the morning teaching a class at 10:00 am. Roller coasters that I was afraid to ride because I felt the the restraints would not hold me in the seat let alone hold me in as the coaster went upside down, I am now riding. Two weekends ago we went to a water park and I wore a swinsuit without having a t-shirt over it to cover my body and felt good about the way I looked. I did feel a little strange at the water park because I had to wear support hose under my swimsuit. This was due to the plastic surgery I had to remove the excess skin off my legs. I still have to wear either support hose or what the doctor calls a "garment" to support my legs. This weekend is festivals; Harborfest and Latinfest at the beach.
Eating at the theme parks is not as difficult as I thought it would be. Most parks allow you to take in some snack foods so I take pretzels and crackers in case I get hungry. I also take some of the individual drink packs so I can have a drink other than water at the parks. And most theme parks now have at least one food vendor where you can get some type of roasted chicken.
06/13/06
One of my goals was to take ballroom dancing. I haven't done that yet (can't find anyone to take them with) but I did take Salsa lessons and was able to practice this past weekend. We went to the Latin Festival down at the beach and while at the festival we danced Salsa
12/29/06 The last part of this year has had some road blocks emotionally for me. I did not realize I could still get angry over things I could not eat. We went to Kings Dominion and even though I took snacks that I could have, I got angry because I could not eat the ice cream, candy and other sweets you could purchase at the park. When I went to my support group after the trip, the people there reminded me of what I knew already. When you feel that way you have to think of all that you can do instead of what you can't eat. I was able to go on the rides and able to keep up with 20 year olds throughout the day.
The latter part of the summer when on the rides at Busch Gardens, I would think Thank You God for these wonderful times too bad I won't be alive next year to enjoy doing the fun things. Other people including my daughter had been asking me what was wrong, why was I sad. When one of the surgical staff at the support group asked if I wasn't feeling well I finally admitted to someone my feeling of going to die. They suggested I get into therapy which I did and and I am beginning to realize that I feel guilty about having a second chance at life. For some reason I feel like I do not deserve it. My daughter has also helped me to realize that I am still trying to live up to standards set by my family which we basically consider wrong. She was taught to value the person not for what they look like but for who they are. My biological family values what you look like and what you have.
On the brighter side, I am taking my dance lessons. My daughter had her "Senior Show" for college where she did an opening of her photography and our "family" came from NH and GA to be there for the opening. We have had a near perfect Christmas season and it continues, so life continues to be good. And I think I am getting to the point where I can believe I deserve this second chance at life. At least I don't think I am going to be dead next year every time I find myself having fun.
Happy New Year Everyone!
11/22/08 I did not realize so much time had elapsed since I had been on this site. So much has happened. Even though 9/23/08 was my 5 year anniversary I just had my 5 year check up yesterday. Everything is going good, the only negative thing is I have 8 pounds that I put on over the summer and now it has to come off. I have learned that even though I am very active and that includes dancing 4 night a week, I still have to do a regular exercise program. Dr. Moore wants me back to walkiing 5-6 times a week so I will get back on my exercise schedule. Because I was also on the go on the weekends, I would grab an egg biscuit on the way and since I could not eat it all at once would nibble throughout the morning. Two things I should not do, eat a lot of bread and nibble throughout the morning. So now back on my routine of no bread and no "grazing" in the morning. Missy gave me tips on how to eat a healthier breakfast, even when on the run. She also shared her way of making sure she makes time for her exercise. The amazing thing is this is all doable, not like before when I would feel defeated.
I still continue to have WOW moments, one of which is each season when I bring out the clothes from last year, they still fit! And l can still can basically do everything I want to do, even though I found out I have osteoarthritis in both my knees. Our schedule continues to be full, we are currently getting ready to go down to Orlando with a schedule from 8:00 am to at least midnight for 11 days., Something I would not have been around to do if I had not had the surgery and weight loss.
It is now the holiday time and I hope everyone has a good holiday season. For me, for Thanksgiving part of what I am thankful for is Dr. Moore, Dr. Spencer and their entire staff. Not only did they give me a second chance at life, they continue to be there to support me and get me back on track when bad habits creep in. I am thankful for the Support Group that also helps me stay on track and remind me that we are not alone and everyone has bad days. For Christmas, when family and friends ask what I want, I still cannot really come up with anything, how can you top the gift I had 9/23/03? With this Chistmas, my surgery, has given me 6 more Christmas holidays with my family.
Have A Great Holiday Season!
09/15/09
Well I am getting ready to celebrate my "6th" birthday. It was 6 years ago on 9/23/03 that I had my surgery. We are getting ready to go for what has become our annual vacation to Orlando and this year it is 12 days from 8:00 am to midnight or later. Trips are already planned for 2010 to go to DC, the West Coast and back to Florida in the fall. The weight has stayed off although I still am battling with my 8 pounds, I guess that makes me a "normal" person.
