MY NAME IS SARAH AND I HAVE BEEN ROUND AS FAR BACK AS I CAN REMEBER OR AT LEAST I CAN REMEMBER IT BEING AN ISSUE BETWEEN MY MOTHER AND I. THERE ARE PICTURES OF ME UNDER THE AGE OF 7 AND I LOOK NORMAL SIZE. WHEN I WAS TEN I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH JUVENILE DIABETES (THAT'S WHAT THEY CALLED IT BACK THEN IN THE 70'S BEFORE CHILDREN/ADULTS WERE GETTING DIABETES AND THE BLACK AND WHITE LINES OF DISTINCTION DUE TO SCIENTIFIC ADVANCEMENTS WERE BLURRING). ALL I KNOW IS THAT I HAVE BEEN INJECTING INSULIN AND FIGHTING/HIDING/MANIPULATING WAYS TO EAT HIGH SUGAR/CARBOHYDRATE FOODS FROM MY MOTHER AND OTHERS---BUT SPECIFICALLY MY MOTHER. MY POOR MOTHER ....LOOKING BACK ,I FEEL FOR HER--SHE WAS AN RN, HAD 4 KIDS, WORKED FULL TIME AND HER OLDEST-ME DEVELOPED DIABETES. MY PRE-TEEN/TEENAGE/YOUNG ADULT YEARS WERE SPENT IN A CONSTANT FOOD BATTLE WITH MY MOTHER AND THEN A FOOD/WEIGHT BATTLE WITH MYSELF. I STEADILY GAINED WEIGHT ALL MY LIFE-- I WAS TOO HEAVY IN HIGHSCHOOL SO I THOUGHT AT 130-160. THEN IN COLLEGE/YOUNG 20'S I WAS CREEPING UP TO 200'S. I MANAGED TO LOSE WT AND GET DOWN TO ABOUT 165 IN MY MID 20'S BY WALKING 5-7 TIMES A WEEK FOR ABOUT 1HR-3HRS AT A STRETCH I STARTED LOSING WT SO I STARTED EATING BETTER. I WAS A NANNY AT THE SAME TIME SO I WAS ALSO ACTIVE WITH MY CHARGE AND IN CHARGE OF KEEPING A LARGE RANCHSTYLE HOUSE CLEAN. WHEN I QUIT THAT JOB IN MY LATE 20'S I ALSO QUIT THE GOOD HABITS AND QUICKLY WENT BACK TO OLD. I GAINED BACK THE 40LBS PLUS A GOOD 20-30. I WAS IN MY MID 30'S AND MID 230-240 LBS. I STARTED A NEW JOB AND A NEW CONDO AND WITHIN 6MONTHS WAS DIAGNOSED WITH SARCOIDOSIS. I NOW CALL IT SUCKADOSIS. I WAS PUT ON STERIODS WHICH HAVE DONE DAMAGE TO MY BODY. MY SUCKADOSIS INVOLVED MY LUNGS AND MY JOINTS. MY LUNGS WERE IN BETTER SHAPE THAN MY JOINTS THOUGH MY WHOLE BODY HURT. MY KNEES/LEGS/FEET/SHOULDERS/ELBOWS/HANDS ETC. THEY FELT LIKE THEY HAD BEEN FROZEN WITH LIQUID NITROGEN AND THAT THEY WERE CRACKING OFF. JUST LIKE IN THE MOVIE WITH ARNOLD SCHWARTZENAGER WHERE THE TRUCK FULL OF LIQUID NITROGEN IS SPILLED ON THE ROAD AND HE AND THE COP/BAD GUY JAMES ??? WALK AND THEIR LIMBS CRACK AND BREAK OFF IS HOW I FELT. SO I HAVE BEEN SITTING AND EATING(THAT'S ONE OF THE HORRIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF STERIODS-THEY HELP YOU EAT AND EAT AND EAT AND EAT) FOR THE PAST 4-5 YEARS. MY LIFE HAS DWINDLED TO WORK/DR APPTS/TV/EATING AND SLEEPING. I AM READY FOR A NEW BEGINNING. I WEIGH OVER 320 LBS,HAVE ZERO CARTLIDGE IN MY KNEES, SLEEP APNEA, SUPER MORBID OBESITY, DEPRESSION, SEVERE OSTEOPEROSIS, ETC. ETC. ETC. SO MY MOTTO IS BETTER NOT BIGGER IN 2007!!!!!!
