sem51
I guess it's time I shared my story. I have always thought I was fat, even when I was a child, because my aunt - who is only about 5 yrs. older than me so is more like an older sister - would tease me & call me fatty. So while I was growing up I was pretty self-conscious about my weight. Also I have always had what you call a pot-belly. Don't know why, I just always had it. In my teens & twenties I actually was at the ideal weight for my height. After my divorce from my first husband, he married a so-called "friend" of mine who I believe is actually anorexic (her idea of a snack is a slice of bread - no crust - and water!). During one of my daughter's visits, they taught her the rhyme, "Fatty, fatty, 4 by 4, can't get through the kitchen door", and told her to sing it to me when she got home. She did, not realizing the meaning and intent, and it broke my heart. I had gained a couple of pounds but was still well within the range for my height. I remarried and we had two more children, both boys. I was able to lose the weight after each pregnancy, but I continued to be very aware of my weight, how I looked, how my clothes fit, etc. When my youngest son was a year old, I started working at a job where my hours were 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. Almost immediately the pounds started packing on. I kept creeping closer & closer to 200 lbs. & I was determined to not get that overweight. One day at the grocery store, I saw a woman who appeared to weigh at least 300 lbs. Her stomach hung down to her knees. I swore that I would never get that big and assured myself that the woman I'd seen at the store undoubtedly had severe medical problems that contributed to her weight. I didn't have any medical problems, I was sure I just needed to eat right and exercise and the weight would go away. At 190 lbs., I was totally horrified that nothing I did seemed to stop the weight gain. My husband took out a small loan & I signed up with Nutri-System. Eating their food & taking their vitamins, I managed to lose 30 lbs. before I hit a plateau. But at 160 lbs. I was sure that I could change my eating habits (I did), and keep exercising (I did), and the weight would stay off (it didn't). Slowly, the pounds came back. Next thing I knew, I had breezed right past the 200-lb. mark & was pushing 250. I was so embarrassed when it occurred to me that the professional football players that I loved to watch didn't weigh as much as me!!! Even the sportscasters made a little fun of the heavier players who weighed over 200 lbs., and there I was, heavier than a football player!!! I gave up dieting, but did try to eat healthier and get a little exercise. I had been taking classes at the local community college in order to get a better job, then went on to get a Social Work degree. A few months before I graduated, I had to have a hysterectomy to remove a football-sized fibroid tumor. Imagine how shocked I was one day when, walking up to the glass door at my new job, I noticed in my reflection my belly fat hanging - actually swinging back and forth - below my "fashionable" pullover shirt!!! 
Now since then, I have been diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, and obstructive sleep apnea. While I haven't actually "dieted" I have at times eaten only tossed green salads for lunch & tried to stick to a diet that would help keep my glucose levels in check. It hasn't worked. I've done the Curves workout alternating with aquarobics, but didn't lose more than a couple of pounds. My high weight was 260-something. I currently weigh 249. So that's how I got to be O-BESE! (I hate that word!!) I'm working with Tallgrass General & Vascular Surgery in Topeka, & plan to have the RNY.
