Salsajo
2/10/07
I am just waiting for insurance approval for my WLS. Hopefully the surgery will be the first week of April 2007. I am patiently(???) waiting. I will add more to my story very soon!
2/14/07
Happy Valentine's Day! Today I am supposed to call to see if my insurance approved my surgery or not. I am scared to make the call. I also am having a hard time losing weight like the surgeon requested. Seems like I have every excuse in the world for that!
3/01/07
I'm still waiting for my insurance approval. It seems they didn't submit it to them until 2/21/07......thank you. :( I have to wait 6 more days.
Meanwhile I thought I would update my profile. I have been concerned with my weight ever since high school ( even tho I only weighed 130 pounds then!). My adult life has been on a BIG yo-yo diet ride!!! I have been on every imaginable diet there is. TOPS Club (2 times), Diet Center, Weight Watchers, New Day, NutriSystem, low calorie, low fat, low carb, grapefruit diet, cabbage soup diet, Mayo diet, and anything else you can think of!! I spent alot of money and had limited success....20-30 pounds TEMPORARILY lost only to gain that plus more.
I have low self-esteem and can't remember the last time I wasn't depressed over the way I looked. It's been an inner battle for years and I am looking forward to be rid of that feeling and having a body I can be proud of!
I never really thought of having WLS surgery because I was sure that SOMEDAY I would be successful and lose my extra weight. However, now I am 250 pounds and seem to have lost my fighting drive. When I went to a class that was about WLS, I was very interested. I researched for hours online and learned so much about the procedure. Immediately I felt there was hope for me! I contacted my doctor and got her approval and a referral to the bariatric center. This all was in September 2006. By November 2006 I had completed everything I needed to do before scheduling surgery except my cardiologist clearance and completing my visits with the nutritionist.
The cardiologist clearance was a little scary for me because 12 years ago I had a heart attack and triple bypass surgery. Then 6 years ago I had a mild stroke. This was all in my 40's!!!! Bad genes!!! But to get approval for "elective" surgery???? I worried. But I went through every test....a stress test that showed abnormalities, and echocardiogram which was hard to read, and finally an angiogram. My doctor was sure I would need an angioplasty and a stent put in because he felt there was a blockage. But the angiogram turned out well considering my past. AND HE GAVE ME CLEARANCE!!!!!!!!!! :)
I completed the 3 visits with the nutritionist and now I wait. In the meantime, I spend a lot of time on OH and get alot of my questions answered and I give help back when I can. I have the support of my loving husband and my kids are coming around pretty well. They are so afraid of losing their mom or maybe me possibly failing at this as well. (Note: That will never happen!)
OH really helps me through moments. I enjoy reading other stories written with such humor. I can totally relate to wanting my shoestrings tied in the center of my shoes and not closest to me. I look forward to the day when I too, can cross my legs comfortably. And the thought of climbing a flight of stairs and still be able to talk will thrill me! I want to run with my grandchildren.....play with my dogs.....and have a fun!
Till next time.......
3/07/07
YIPPEE!!!!WHOOOOOOOHEEEEEEEE!!!! I got my approval so my date for surgery is April 10. That is only 34 days away! What an exciting day! Now I have to get serious and lose a few pounds so they know I mean business with this weight loss plan!!!!!I was amazed at all the positive response and encouragement and excitement from all the people on OH message board. YOU ALL ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)
3/18/07
Nothing new here. I am still trying to be patient for April 10. I'm still not nervous about this. I have really come to grips with it. I am sure I will be nervous the day of, though. I still can't seem to lose weight before my "date" but I am trying. The SlimFast drink I was having for lunch for two weeks made me feel sick so I had to stop that. Now it is just trying to keep portions smaller and avoid the really bad foods! I did re-join Curves last week so that is good! I am so out of shape!!! I have been wearing my pedometer also which is interesting! I spend way too much time on OH website, though. Hahaha I learn so much from there. I appreciate all the help I get from there! Til the next time.....
4/1/07
This is no April Fool's joke! I am 9 days away from having surgery! Last week was so horrible! This week has to be better. Let me tell you how last week went. On Monday, I got a call from my brother who had had a lung transplant and he said his body was rejecting his lungs and the doctors said there was nothing they could do. Also, on Monday, my MIL saw her doctor and they told her she needed to go on kidney dialysis 3 X week. Since I drive her quite often, this would really affect me. By noon that day, I was a basket case of emotions and I couldn't handle them very well. Guess my nerves about my upcoming surgery didn't help matters any.
Wednesday I went to the NP for my pre-op visit. That was a horrid day and she is one he** of a bit**!! I won't ever see her again! She was cold, discouraging, and spoke very condescending toward me. My hubby was there and heard it all. She was so negative! She couldn't belive I was having this surgery with my heart history. She kept shaking her head and asking me twice..."they don't know why you had a stroke??!!" NO, they don't! She proceeded to tell me the risks of this surgery and when she said "Death", she turned to look straight at me! Then she was totally angry that I had lost only 3 pounds so far before my surgery date. She said I had to come back for a weigh in check. Ok, I can do that. But she was totally disgusted with me. Then she said Dr. I has lost 2 patients in his years here and one of them was due to.....heart problems. And as she said that, she looked at me and I swear i saw the glimpse of a smile! Then when I told her that I was really going to make this a success and that I will NEVER again weigh what I do now, she said..."well, old habits are hard to break". I told her that I was determined to make it work and no, I will never weigh what I do now again. She again said, "well, old habits are hard to break". Then I got angry and said that what is the sense of having this surgery if you feel I will fail??!! I WON'T fail because I won't let myself!!!!!. Then she smiled a oversweet, fake smile and said well, you go, girl. She was so rude! I cried and cried and cried when my hubby and I left. I am planning on writing everything down and sending it in to her and her superiors but am waiting until I have my surgery 4/10.
On Wednesday night, my brother called me back and said he saw another doctor and they think his problem is not rejection but a problem caused by one of his medications! So there is HOPE! I cried tears and tears of happiness hearing this wonderful news but afterward, I couldn't stop crying and almost hyperventilated. The ups and downs of emotions in one day was too much for me! My MIL is home now from her 3 day hospital stay and not feeling very well but I am hoping once she gets used to the dialysis, she will feel better. And other people have volunteered to help with transportation so I don't have to worry about that.
My OH friends and my hubby have helped me feel more of a balance in my life and for them I am so grateful.
Nine more days....just nine more days! Actually 8 days and a wake up. Wish me luck and say a prayer for me that I will be around for my family MANY more years!
4/7/07
I'm living through the weekend before my surgery now and amazingly quite calm! Last week I got so sick! Monday night I felt a little achy. But Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, I had a fever, chills, and achyness all over. Nothing helped but I kept forcing the fluids and resting with tons of blankets on me. Went to work on Friday much better. Today, Saturday, I have been resting again and taking whatever I can for a little sore throat hoping it doesn't turn into strep throat. What kind of timing is this??!!! For crying out loud!!!!!!!!!! UGH! Anyway, i am sure I will be fine by Tuesday.
I was going through town today and I was watching the people as we drove. I found myself thinking of something that I realized I always do. I would see a heavy person and I would think Oh, I know how that person feels. I would see someone with tight pants and I would think, I wonder if s/he has to unzip them as soon as they get home each day like I do just to breathe. I felt sorry for the shy, uncomfortable looking person who was showing signs of low self esteem probably due to their weight because I knew how they felt. I felt uncomfortable around the self assured, almost cocky person who being thin could not ever understand what I go through all day every day. It made me realize, my whole life is constantly surrounded with thoughts of my obesity!!!!!!!! This whole way of thinking has to stop. I just realized I dwell too much on outside appearance of myself. I can not do that anymore. I can't look in my mirror with disgust anymore. I have to see the beauty inside me like my hubby does. Hopefully my self-esteem will improve with this surgery. I've been so unhappy with my body for years. I look forward to the day when I can walk by people and smile and never wonder if they are thinking how fat I am. I wait for that day.
4/14/07
Well, look at this! It is past my surgery date! Yes! I had my surgery and I am home and feeling so good! If I would have died in the hospital, I chose THIS date to be buried because it is my youngest baby's birth/death date 23 years ago. Sad day. But today I am alive....feeling good....have much to be thankful for....and so happy!
We left for the hospital at 6:15 am.on Tuesday. Surgery was scheduled for 10:00 but I was supposed to be there by 8:00. For some reason, they moved me up so when I got there, all was a hustle and I went in by 8:45! I was done by 11:05. Had it done laproscopically which was great. I stayed in recovery until 2:15. No real problems but my heart rate did drop pretty low a few times. The cardiologist checked me and said I would be fine. They moved me onto the cardiac floor because of my history where the nurses there were tremendous. I felt great....never had any pain above a "2".
I went home on Thursday, the 12th. Wore me out a little but other than that, I felt fine. Even better the next day. Having a little hard time getting much liquids in but I am improving each day.
Saturday the 14th I woke up and knew I had a bladder infection. Probably from having the catheter in. No big deal. I got an antiobiotic and felt great all day. Still on a clear liquid diet for a few more days but I am not hungry. I wish the fluid build up in my body would go away but I do feel good and I am happy I did this. Have to move around a bit more now. I'm getting antsy to do things. That's a good sign!!
I still haven't struggled with any food issues or problems as of yet but I would have to say this....as of right now, I feel the hardest part of this whole situation (including surgery and recovery) is the prep time getting ready for the surgery. Too many questions, too many emotions, fears, doctor visits of all kinds, and all the worries involved. I hated that whole part. Surgery was easy compared to that. Now I feel I am on the downhill path to good health! There may be a few bumps but nothing will stop me from being healthier, happier, and looking better ever again!
6/11/07
I can't believe two months have gone by already! I feel great! I haven't had any problems at all since surgery. I almost wish I would have because I can eat just about anything. Well, there are a few things that make my pouch angry....like fatty foods (sausages, brats, etc.). I still have to work on chewing more and slowing down while eating! I seem to get my food stuck and slowly go down and it hurts as it goes quite often. Old habits die hard.
Sweets don't really bother me unless I try more than a sample bite. That is good, I guess. If I could eat a large amount, I probably would at times. But since I can only handle a small bite, I will accept that. I don't dump but if I eat too much, my tummy seems to twist and scream "Don't give me this stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Today I go back to Curves. I will weigh in there and get measured. I am a little impatient with the scale.....it seems like everyone is losing more than I do. I have to get back on track of writing my foods down and seeing if I overdo at times! I also should try to get in more water.
Even though I have lost 38 pounds, it doesn't really show much. My face was the first noticeable spot but not really anywhere else is obvious to anyone. I can button my uniform jackets now so that is good. But when I see pictures of myself, I cringe because I still look so fat. Will I ever look nice? Will I ever get to "Onederland"?
7/11/07
Time is going by so fast. Soon summer will be gone. It's 3 months now since my surgery and I am feeling fine. The only problem I have is remembering to chew slowly!!!!! I chew and then swallow and I can feel with pain the food going down down down. It takes my breath away! You would think I would learn quicker than I am. I guess it was many years of gobbling fast that got me into my "fat" mode and that habit is hard to break.....but I will succeed!
I don't post too many messages anymore since I am working 4 days a week and in the nice weather we try to go camping as often as possible. I do try to read the message board each day, though. I don't want to lose touch and there are always questions and answers I need to learn. My mother-in-law is sick and not doing very well at all so there is a lot of stress at home. I feel so bad for her and for my husband. It is hard on us all.
I don't regret having this surgery at all but I am so impatient with my weight loss. I have lost 46 pounds but when I see photos, I still see so MUCH fat!!!!!!!!! I'm almost half way to goal...I just don't see how losing 50 more pounds will make me look thin. I eat because I have to....not because food tastes good. Because it really doesn't. Nothing really tastes like it did before. That is a little disappointing to me but at the same time, I am glad because it helps me from overeating. I have not experienced dumping or the foamies and I hope I never do. I am fine as long as I eat slowly. So that continues to be my goal. And then the weight should just come off nicely. I have to be patient. Don't we all?! Til later......
9/12/07
Another two months have gone by and I am doing fine! Losing a little slower than I had hoped but I haven't been keeping my food journal and I cheat on occasion. Shame on ME! My portions are still small but sugar doesn't bother me in the portions I eat. But yes, I know I shouldn't eat them at all. I will regret this if I continue with bad habits.
If I eat too fast and get too full too quickly, I do experience the "foamies" which are not pleasant for a few minutes. My hubby feels so sorry for me and I know after seeing me suffer for only a few minutes on occasion, he has definitely decided he would never go through this surgery. I told him that even with the few occasions of discomfort, I do not regret having the surgery and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I feel so healthy and energetic now! And happier! Clothes are fun!
I've lost just about 60 pounds now in 5 months and the inches are melting away. I still have a ways to go but there is hope now and just feeling healthier is a big plus for me! My hubby is excited and happy for me...my brother even says I'm looking good. One of my co-workers didn't even recognize me at first at a "dress-up" affair! I changed my hairdo and I think a lot of people think that is my only change cuz they compliment me on my hairdo but don't say much about my weightloss. haha I don't care as long as I am looking good!! Gotta get back on track with stricter eating habits and exercise, though. I'll keep you posted!
11/17/07
Just a quick update..I've been on a 2 month stall at 184-186 pounds but I am hanging in there. I can't give up! It is so frustrating, though! I want to lose another 36 pounds so bad! Boy, 36 pounds doesn't sound like much but I guess they can be stubborn.
I feel great! My health is good. 13 years ago today I had a heart attack. I also quit smoking 13 years ago today! I'm celebrating LIFE now.
It's fun seeing the pictures of my "friends" here....everyone is getting smaller! 
I got measured yesterday at Curves (I do that every 2 months) and was surprised to hear that even though I am stalling on weight loss, I have lost more inches!!!! Wow! The holidays are ahead so that will be interesting. I love to bake but I just can't eat the same so I don't know how I will handle that yet. But I feel everything will be just fine. A lot of my friends and family will enjoy homemade goodies. Talk to you soon!
4/21/08
I can't believe I let 5 months go by without an update! Sorry. I am doing great! I have made it through an whole year now and although I haven't yet reached my own personal goal, I am happy and feeling fine. I have lost 84 pounds but still would like to lose another 16. Yep, I want to be a century club loser! It's coming off slowly now but it is still coming off.
My last cardiology report shows that my heart muscle has greatly improved and is stronger and that was my #1 reason for having the surgery so I am thrilled about that!!! I have lots of energy and my self-esteem has gotten much more positive.
I haven't really had any dumping experiences like some people do. If I eat quickly, I suffer and I guess I did get sick because of it once but that was my own fault. Live and learn. But I do know there are certain foods that don't sit well with me and I try to avoid them or limit them to extremely small portions. These include sausage, ice cream, pasta, and pork. I don't suffer for giving them up though. It was no big deal not eating them. I AM able to eat chocolate and other candy and wish I couldn't. It would make it a lot easier if I would get sick on those. But no, I still love them all and have to use my own willpower to stay away as much as I can from those. I don't eat chips as much, though, and that surprises me because chips were always my favorite snack. Now they all taste blah. That's good.
I am so very happy I had this surgery. I wish I could have done it 20 years ago! Maybe I could have avoided my heart attack. I don't think I will have any plastic surgery. It's not an issue for me. The little bit of loose skin on my tummy doesn't bother me enough to have another surgery. Maybe if I were younger and had no heart disease....who knows? All I know is that I am so happy the surgery went well for me and I have many more years of happy living to do. Exercise and water is what I am trying to include every day.
3/9/07Wt.248lbs.Bust 51"Waist47"Abs54"Hips551/2"Thighs28"Arms15" Sob, sob, sob.......One month before surgery
4/10/07Day of surgery
6/11/07Wt.211.75lbs.(Total lost 36.25)Bust 46"Waist40"Abs49"Hips49"Thighs25"Arms13"--I LOST 33 1/2" !!!!.....Two months after surgery
7/11/07Wt.203lbs.(Total lost 45)Bust 45.5"Waist39"Abs49"Hips49"Thighs24.5"Arms13"--I LOST 2 1/2 more inches!....3 months after surgery
9/12/07Wt.191.75lbs.(Total lost 56.25)Bust 44"Waist36.5"Abs45"Hips47.5"Thighs24"Arms12.5"--I lost 11 1/2 more inches!....5 months after surgery
11/16/07Wt.185.50lbs.(Total lost 62.5)Bust42"Waist35.5"Abs45"Hips47"Thighs22"Arms11.5"--Lost 9 1/2 more inches!....7 months after surgery
4/21/08Wt.164 lbs.(Total lost 84)Bust40,5"Waist32.5"Abs43"Hips44"Thighs21.5"Arms11"--Lost 12 more inches!....1 yr. after surgery. Total in. lost 68.5
