Norma_ENVY
WLS JOURNAL
4/07/04 - Officially started my WLS journey today. After doing plenty of research on the subject, watching the newly found exposure of bariatric surgery on TV/Media, and just surfing the web, I went to see my PCP to see what a person interested in gastric bypass has to do. I weighed in at 245lb, 5'5" and that resulted in my BMI being 40, which made me a candidate. My PCP was not very informed in the subject and asked her attending doctor/supervisor to sit in and talk to me about the various options. Dr. Le didn't seemed convinced that I should look further into bariatric surgery, but I asked to please provide a referral and her attending agreed that I should schedule a consultation with Dr. Khatkhouda at USC Univ. Got my referral letter and ready to go.
Total Cost: $11.00
My Cost: $20.00 copay
4/17/04 - Patient seminar for Dr. K's office. Before scheduling an appt. with Dr. K, I have to sit through a patient seminar in which they go over the procedure, important information about the results and effects of WLS, and everything else you want to know about it. I was one of the smallest people there, which was a first for me. I went alone, my boyfriend didn't want to go. I think he's just scared that I'll go through with it and thinks I may just not want to after hearing the facts. Well, it actually went the other way. I am very interested in further meeting with Dr. K and going on my WLS adventure to the new me :)
Total Cost:
My cost: 0/zero
4/23/04 - First consult with Dr. Khatkhouda at USC University Hospital. Great doc but the whole experience was very "production line" like. Go in, sit down, get weighed, wait here, answer questions, go to another waiting room, wait for nurse, wait for doctor, given forms, on your way out. Don't get me wrong, Dr. K was great. I met with him for about 15-20mins, he answered my questions, examined my abdomen and said i was a perfect candidate. BMI 40. He then informed me to wait for a call from Naomi for a surgery date...would take 2months.
241 lbs
Total Costs: $245.00
My cost: $20 copay
6/18/04: Did my stress test today. It totally caught me by surprise. I thought I'd be doing a little running or fast paced walking on the threadmill, just to get the heart pumping. Nobody told me that it would be a sprint to the finish!!! sweating, breating hard, etc...lol. Well, it wasn't that bad. I didnt know that I could stop the test at any point that I felt tired. I tried doing the whole test, waiting for the end, pushing myself further, just a little more walking, more faster, more and more...and it wasn't ending. At 8mns into it, I stopped and they hooked me up to the monitors and took my info. I just layed there as I cooled down and my heart came back to HUMAN NORMALITY! lol.
Total Cost: $1649.00
My Cost: $0/zero
6/24/2004: Met with Dr. Martin from CSC. I had lost a few pounds, and ironically, fallen under the 40BMI requirement for him to consider me a candidate for RNY. How ironic is that! I was 250 when I saw Dr. K, was 240 when I saw Dr. Martin, which put me at BMI 39.8!!! He said that I should make a follow up appointment with him or one of his associates to see where I stood in a few weeks. I got really bummed out about all this, ended up putting on a few pounds.....too damn ironic :(
238 lbs
Total cost: $234.00
My Cost: $20 copay
6/28/04 - still haven't heard from Naomi or gotten a surgery date. Have tried calling, asking, inquirying about a surgery date but they're giving me no hope. The wait at USC is about 8months to year. I'm waaaay to impatient for that. Ive been contemplating WLS for a year now...I'm not about to wait another year twidling my thumbs! Gonna check out other docs in the area.
6/29/04: Did my bloodwork today at USC Univ. Hospital. Had to pee in a cup, get lots of blood drawn, etc - very straight forward. The dude couldn't find my vein and seemed nervous, which got ME NERVOUS! lol. But, I survived. Hopefully I'll get the results back quick and get this party started! Still have no surgery date from Dr. Khatkouda's office at USC :(
Total cost: $669.85
My cost: zero/$0 (no copay)
7/6/04: Did my pscy evaluation with Dr. Artin today. Again, another very straight forward pretest. He asked me general questions about my life, my reasons for wanting WLS, if I knew the dangers and side effects, etc. Also asked about my past, childhood, etc...ya know, the things psychiatrists ask to hit a nerve or something! I'm a nut overall, but psychologically, I'm harmful
Total Cost: $300.00
My cost: $20.00 copay
7/8/04 - First consult with Dr. Lourie in Pasadena, one of Dr. Martin's associates in Pasadena. All went well; I was a little late (duh, got lost) and made the Doc wait. He was awesome. Answered all my questions, didn't make me feel rushed, went through my whole forms and applications and answered my questions. I've already done my psych evaluation, bloodwork, and stress test - so now just gotta do the rest of the tests.
250 lbs
Total Cost: $440.00
My Cost: $20 copay
7/20/04 - Met with the sleep study doc about giving me the green light for (not having) sleep apnea...buuut, I have to go sleep in the clinic! Maybe I can take my doggies gimli and precious...nobody will notice...sssshhhh...My boyfriend is so sweet, when I told him I'd be staying a night for the sleep study, he already wanted to be by my side and spend the nite with me at the clinic...he's a sweetheart, but I'm definitely doing this one on my own.
Total cost:
Cost: Copay $20
7/21/04 - on the same day, I was denied and then approved by my insurance company (United Healthcare, EPO). I was called by UHC telling me that I had been denied because of an exclusion clause on my employer's insurance benefits. I quickly got on the phone with my benefits office and they said that as long as I had a medical necessity/predetermination letter, I should not be denied. Sure enough, at 4pm I got a call from my insurance company approving me! :) yaaaay! Still don't have a surgery date, but as soon as I finish all the pretests, I should be ready to go!
7/22/04 - Had my overnite sleep study lastnite...I was a bit scared, but just being silly - there definitely nothing to be worried about. All they did was strap me to some sensor stuff on my face, legs, neck and head, and I was off to bed. Filled out some surveys, went to bed, and at 6am they woke me up. I woke up a few times during the nite but don't think there's anything to be worried about. Did all these testing more as a precaution and to get a very BRIGHT green light for my operation.
Total Cost: $1940.00
My Cost: zero/0, no copay.
Checklist to self: Psych evaluation DONE, bloodwork DONE, sleep study DONE (just need the followup to go over results), and meeting with a dietician on friday, 7/23/04..as well as doing my abdominal ultrasound and upper GI. Woo hoo, I'm on a roll :)
7/23/04: Did my ultrasound today and Upper GI thing. The ultrasound was weird because it actually did hurt :( Not necessarily a pain that I should be worried about, but it does hurt a little when the tech was PUSHING WITH ALL HER HUMAN FORCE against my stomach. Mind you, I have a fairly flat stomach but she kept a'pushin' and a'pushin'. It was bearable, just complaining. After that, had my upper GI scan. Waited around longer than the actual procedure lasted. They made me get on this levatating bed looking machine to take pictures of my lining, stomach, etc. I had to take this alka-seltzer like thing and immediately wanted to burp! The doc told me to do everything possible to hold it in! lol. It was pretty funny. I then drank this thick, heavy pepto bismol looking drink and they took pictures while I was standing, laying down, on my side, etc. Pretty cool experience. Saw ultrasound of my insides and those upper GI pics...After all that, went to go see the dietician. Very informative but very rushed. She zipped through a handout they give preops for the different stages and asked that I come back again or call if I have any questions. Weighed in at 246lbs. Pretty much, I'll be rereading the handout with the notes added, and that should be enough. Ordered some protein powder and bars from www.bariatriceating.com and hope they taste yummy. Ima give them a try at pre-op to tweak my tastes and see what I like the most.
246 lbs
Total Cost:
Cost: $20.00 copay
7/27/04: Dr's. appt with Dr. Anderson to go over sleep study results. No sleep apnea, no major problems...just said very mild snoring...heeey, I don't snore!!!! lol. So, got the green light from the sleep doctor to go ahead with the surgery. I called my psych office to have them fax over my evaluation to Dr. Lourie's office since they haven't gotten it..grrr. No surgery date yet; Monique, Dr. Lourie's nurse said that the doc was going over my file and should be hearing soon....can't wait :)
I am officially done with all the pretests!!! woooo hoooo! I MAY have to do my bloodwork over because I ate before doing my bloodwork, and I wasn't suppose to because they were testing my cholesterol level. I ate a chicken sandwhich from Rally's so I totally didn't fast since I didn't know i had to :( Buuut, I may not have to redo it....we'll see what happens.
244 lbs
Total Cost:
Cost: $20.00 copay for Dr. Anderson
7/30/04: Woo hoo! Turned 25 today :) Pretty much slept half of the day (took the day off from work), hung out with my sister and her little boy and just watched movies...yeah, yeah, very non-eventful but had lots of fun and very relaxed now :) Went out to dinner with my boyfriend; met up with friends at Charlie Browns for a few drinks, and drank 24 away with a nice shot of casadores. lol. I wonder how my surgery will affect my social/alcohol consumption? Geez, I sound like an alchie!!!
8/2/04: Called Dr. Lourie's office to see what my "status" was on a surgery date. Talked to Monique, his nurse, and she said that the doc will give the word once he reviews my entire file. At least I know they have all my pretest results. Waiting really sucks. She said I should be hearing by the end of this week...we'll see...:/
8/5/04: ***I GOT A DAAAATEE!!!***
Original Post by Norma G at 10:57 AM PST on 08/05/2004
Los Angeles, CA
After pesturing Dr. Lourie's office for the last day or so on my status for a surgery date, they said I'm been given the green light and was ready to schedule a surgery date! I had a chance to choose between two dates: a cancellation on: AUG 11th (which is NEXT WEEK!) or AUG 30th which is only...one, two, three,...twenty five days from today!!!! I went with the 30th, the 11th was cutting it waaay too short since I have to ask for time off from work, etc....Oh my gaaaaawd! I'm sooo EXCITED! I finally have a date to circle on my calendar and LET THE COUNTDOWN BEGIN!!!!!!! I'm soooo excited! I started this whole journey the beginning of this year, was put on a waiting list at USC Univ., then found Dr. Lourie's info here on OH and things are finally kicking into high-est gear!
Woo hoo for meeeeeeee!!!
Surgery Date: AUGUST 30TH - 7:30am!!!!!
8/8/04: Weekend has been very uneventful. I lay at night thinking about my surgery date, but I don't think it has SUNK in just yet. I have these spectrums of emotions: excited, scared, moody, happy, looking forward to the date, etc. but it really hasn't HIT ME that the surgery will be in 22days. I haven't given my notice at work or made any major preparations - eh, I still have some time. I have a feeling that I will be going BALLISTIC next week and it will eventually settle in and I'll be a wreck :) but, overall, I'm excited and relieved that it is just around the corner. Just wanna be a loser already! lol. The cali board has been great at answering all my questions and concerns. Just pretty much a waiting game now.
8/16/04: 14 more days, wow...that's JUST 2 WEEKS~! Still hasn't hit me. I'll be talking to my boss in about 30mins to figure out my medical leave and what is needed while I'm out. I've reserved 1 month for medical leave, although people have ranged from 3weeks to 6 weeks. I'll take it as it goes and hopefully will be up on my feet in no time. I'm planning to go to the No.Cal event on 8/21 to meet folks I've kept in touch with on OH. Should be lots of fun. It just seems that my focus is on "getting things done/taken care of" before the 30th. Overall, I'm doing good. I've bought:
-Crystal Lite drinks
-Fruit H20 water
-Flintstone multivitamins
-34oz water/protein containers (for work and carry around)
-64 oz container for water mainly, to have in the fridge,etc
-Bought the magic bullet small blender yesterday on infommercial (I'm bad, I always want to buy stuff off tv! but, my boyfriend agreed it be a good thing to have around...woo hoo, MARGARITAS!)
-Protein powder (Nectar, strawberi/kiwi)
-Protein bars (assorted)
That should keep me busy for the time being :)
Also, I've noticed people make LISTS they'd like to do post-op. Here's my lame attempt at it:
-fit into a size 16 pants (that was my lowest size, that I can remember)
-cross my legs without problems/numming
-paint my toe nails with ease
-be able to walk up a flight of stairs without thinking i'm having a stroke!
*my list sucks...lol* I'll add as I go. 2 more weeks..weeeee****
8/28/04: Went in on a saturday to do all my preop testing and just get things squared away for my monday morning surgery.
Cost/My Cost: $500.00 - program fee, not covered by insurance
9/3/04: Well folks, I made it :) My surgery went as planned on 8/30 and was out of the hospital at ~7pm the next day, 8/31. At the moment, it kinda sucks because I'm not 100% but know I will be there with time and patience. It hasnt been a smooth ride - I've been in some pain, dizziness, nausea, and just cabin fever overall. You can only watch so many hours of tv, or sip so much of your protein drink before you are ready to choke someone! I've tried keeping up with my water and protein, but it is definitely harder than I originally thought. Before the surgery, I would make protein drinks at work, drink them throughout the day, no sweat. Now, this whole "sipping" totally throws you off. You get full right away, and then the muscle pain and gassy feeling don't help. If only the soreness and dizziness/nausea would go away, I'd be doing great! The 5 small cuts are nothing, they don't hurt on the surface, but definitely feel pressure underneath - as if I sat and did a million situps and just can't walk from the soreness. I haven't been keeping up with my protein and water, which is why I may be dizzy here and there, and nauseous at night. I had to take pain medication via pill (since the liquid stuff my doc gave me wasnt doing the job). All I can say is "weird" how it feels as anything non-liquid goes down your belly. I literally thought I would have the pill lodged because of the bloated feeling I was getting. I'll definitely be keeping away from any pills and just being as brave as I can and bare the pain :) Crazy adventure I've put myself in! My first words out of surgery were "what did I do to myself!?"...made my boyfriend and nurse laugh, but it totally feels as if you are hit by a truck and just at the mercy of the morphine pump. Ahhh, the morphine...i luved that...but, relied too much on it and had a hard case of withdrawal when they started giving me pain meds via mouth. Gets you pretty woozie as it leaves your system *sigh*
Well, I got on the scale...I'm shy of a week (monday, 9/6/04 will be 1wk post op), and I've dropped 17pounds. I dont know from where, or how, or why, but that's that scales story and it's sticking to it! It's definitely not visible - I wouldnt have believed it if I hadn't weighed myself the day before surgery, but sure enough: -17lbs. I guess all I can do is celebrate and go get some chicken broth..woo hoo...:( lol. I'm just being a HUGE BABY about this because I can. I have the support of my family and the love of my life (beto) and that's all I need or want. They support and love me through my pouts and pissy fits, and I love them more and more as they come back for more. I'll be good, I promise....just no more protein drinks!!!! yuck...
THANK YOU TO ALL FOR THE SUPPORT FROM PEOPLE ON OH! The Cali Board has welcomed me with open arms and am grateful to have that avenue of support and knowledge. MUAZ, MUAZ, MUAZ to all of you for your love and prayers - extra MUAZ to those that posted on my support surgery page. That page has been such a booster in my progress. Thank you and love ya all :)
8/30/04 (recap):I have 5 new scars to confirm that 8/30 did happen and it wasn't just a dream. I got into the hospital at about 5:45am, went through registration, all the minor paperwork that was left over and in a waiting room at about 6:15am. My mom, dad and boyfriend accompanied me through this difficult-slash-exciting morning/day. I was in my waiting room, in a gown, and surrounded by my beto and mom (dad had to wait outside, only 2 people could accompany me till the last moment before surgery). I met the anesthesiologist, my nurse, had my last chance to go to the restroom, and my last official weigh-in. I weighed in at 248lbs on the hospital scale (my weight at Dr. Lourie's read 255lbs on friday, 8/27). The nurse tried to get the IV in, didn't work !@*$&@!!!! That shit hurt, but I was very brave. She was on her second attempt...and nothing. The anesthesiologist just jumped in and did it himself..lol. I was layed down on my gourney, and lone and behold, Dr. Lourie was there at the door. He gave me our last parting words and I interpreted to my mom that he was my doc...My boyfriend skillfully went to the weighting room and sneaked my dad in, and all three were there to fare me a well goodbye/see ya in a few hours. I remember going into the operating room, being asked to slide onto the operating table, and listened as the OR techs devated about some basketball game...I was too nervous to catch the final score :) My anesthesiologist told me he'd be pumping in the happy juice, and before I could think anything...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Next thing I remember, I was in my private room, and woke up to the sight of my boyfriend next to me. I had gone from OR, to the recovery room, and then my private room...my family patiently waiing outside for any and all news. Groggy...very groggy...that's all I can say about the rest of 8/30...I don't remember much, just coming in and out and hitting my morphine pump every 20mins...
10/14/04: Been a while since I posted, but finally feeling human and back at work. I ended up taking 6wks off on medical leave. Overall, I was low on energy, throwing up a lot, and just acting like a big baby. I'm much better now and finally feeling like I made the right decision with this surgery. Right after surgery, when I tried to eat foods and felt nauseous, I thought I had done the wrong decision. I have to be honest though, I didn't stick to my doctor's nutrition list. After surgery I was suppose to do: 2wks clear liquids, then 2wks of whole juices, then 2wks of puree's, and then 5wks of eating solids 3oz..then 5wks after than, go up to 4-6oz. At week 2, I was eating soft foods, and at 3wks I was already trying everything for a bite or two. I did dumb things after my first week post op: chewed some food for the flavor and spit it out (did that with a bbq hotdog, a bite of a burger, and carl's jr. burger). I really felt like I was more head hungry than anything, but knew that my tummy would get upset if I ate anything. Eventually and steadily I started adding foods here and there and am now at the point where I am able to eat a meal (~3oz) with ease. I'm bad at times, and will take a bite from my boyfriend's chips, or a sip of soda, or a french fry. My food choices overall are healthy, but there are times I feel like I need that little kick in my diet. Definitely not a norm nor will I go back to my bad eating habits, just a way to feel more normal. I'm currently in week 6 post op and down **drum roll please** -34 lbs. :) Yaaay! I definitely don't notice the difference; still wear my same clothes, just not as snug. Overall, definitely feeling better after this procedure and can't wait to see the difference after I hit -50..or so. My goal weight is 150, but for now, I'd be ecstatic if I saw a # with a 1 in front of it!!! 199, here I come!!! lol. I'll try to be more consistent with my journal entries since I'm back in the swing of things and looking forward to what the future holds for my weight loss adventure :)
10/15/04: Woo hoo, my first week back at work and all went well. I decided to make my food intake a more involved activity, so I logged on to fitday.com and entered all my info on what I ate today, my weight, etc. Let's see: today I had a big gulp protein drink (added 2 scoops, that's 46g of protein with 16oz of water...I'm still working on it as we speak), had 3 cali roll pieces and 1/3 of a miso soup for lunch and feel stuffed. Definitely shouldn't be having the rice, but sushi isn't the same without the rice. I have tried peeling it off my cali rolls, but just not the same taste I love. The miso soup went down well, although I just had 1/3 of it..or even less. It's still sitting there while I type here at work. So, according to fitday.com I have consumed 61g protein, 47g of carbs (eek), 6g fat, and 475 cals. I doubt I'll have dinner, if I do, it'll be a bite or two of something unhealthy beto and the family is eating. I'm hoping to go to StacieS's So.cal event this month and meet a few more OH people from on here.
I'm also adding another thing to my goal list I've started on here:
-addition: Have my weight START with a 1 in front of it!!! 199, here I come!!! lol. I definitely want to weigh below 200lbs. Last time I was under 200 was about 4yrs ago. Lowest weight I can remember was 1997 when I weighed 194.
So, thus far:
-fit into a size 16 pants (that was my lowest size, that I can remember)
-cross my legs without problems/numming
-paint my toe nails with ease
-be able to walk up a flight of stairs without thinking i'm having a stroke!
-weigh below 200lbs...have my weight start with a 1 in front of it!
10/20/04: I'm on week 7 of this mind trip and just getting up from my slump. Yesterday was a pretty crapy day. I ended up throwing up (or at least ATTEMPTING to throw up) 3 times! I didn't have much, if any, protein and didn't take much water. We had a meeting at work so had to order Papa John's pizza and chicken. I thought I'd get some chicken tenders and some chicken off the pizza we had, and I'd be good. I really didn't have much, but sure enough, it wanted to come out! I was in my work restroom, gagging, dry heaving and just feeling sooooo crappy. I felt nauseous and dizzy at the same time. I came back to work and felt a bit better after my bathroom episode. I didn't eat a single thing after that. It was about 9pm and my boyfriend went out to get something to eat at taco bell. I've loved the crunchy tacos and can have one of them with some hot sauce and be completely full and satisfied (hehe...1taco, where before it would take about 3 or 4). So, I get one, eat it and just watch tv (Law & Order SVU, i love that show..lol). And sure enough, BAM...I was feeling sweaty, dizzy, nauseous. I ended up going to the restroom and dry heaving, gagging again! I didn't throw up anything, but just that gagging and foamy feeling was so gross. I just felt so crappy after that and just wanted to crawl in a hole and zzzz it off. I had posted on the Cali board about how I SUCK AT THIS, and got some really good feedback. THANKS GUYS! I don't know what I would do without the support on this site. So, this morning, after dropping off my boyfriend at work, I stopped at the supermarket and bought some healthy food I can munch on during the day and avoid my white porcelain catastrophes. I bought some string cheese, some cottage cheese, yogurts and lean cuisines. That should definitely help in the food dept while I get this all figured out! Wish me luck cause I seriously need it. What motivated me to get my healthy food? The fact that i didnt lose a SINGLE pound this week. I'm so disappointed in myself and the bad choices I've done, but as the cali support people said, I'm just a baby at this and it's a whole lifestyle that needs to change...So, here I go...take #2...I'm down 34lbs, week 7, oh, correction: -33, since I think i gained one pound this week (grrrr).
10/25/04: monday morning and just weighed myself before heading to work. I was down a pound or two this week, and to be honest, it sucks! I doubt I lost any weight this week since I just weighed myself in my pj's to avoid any excess weight due to my clothing...lol..i'm a cheater! I guess I've hit a plateau and it totally sucks! I tried keeping up with my protein, but still very low. I get about 20-30grams a day, when I should be having at least 60. This weekend was okay, but I didn't do so well with my intake. Saturday I ate taco bell, that seems to be my new food of choice in the fast food dept. I eat one crunchy taco and feel like I've had a banquet. Well, I had 2 crunchy tacos on saturday (not at once, ofcourse! one for lunch, the other later in the afternoon), and half a soft taco for dinner. I love their hot sauce, it makes food taste good! My boyfriend went to a concert, and after he got home he brought In&Out burgers. I SHOULD HAVE not had any, I SHOULD HAVE just continued watching SNL and IGNORED the burger, but the shit called to me!!! I had about 4bites, not huge bites, but regular to small sized bites and about 3-4 fries. They taste deeeelicious, but a few minutes later, I had to run to the bathroom. Again, didn't throw up any food but just was sooo nauseous and just yucky. That's what I get for being a smart ass and wanting some in n out burger! Sunday wasn't much better. I went to a family's bbq party and had some carne asada with chili sauce. Again, it was deeelicious, but I ate tooo fast and just devoured it down. Shortly after, i was sweaty and nauseous. Didn't throw up or anything, but just felt like crap. Note to self: STOP EATING SO FAST! The meat was very tasty and a good source of protein, since I only ate meat and no other carbs like rice or tortillas, but I ate too fast. I had some raw veggies (carrots and brocoli) with some dipping sauce, and those were good. Anywho, I'll try to be better this week and take more protein and less bad stuff! oh, and more water, ofcourse :) adios!!!
11/1/04: This past weekend I attended the OH convention in hollywood/universal city, california. It was at the hilton and I am definitely happy I went. Friday night was the masquerade ball. It was okay; not my type of party, but it was a fun get-together and dressed up as Dorothy from Wizard of Oz (also had a basket that had my dog's pic on it with a big ol' REWARD sign on it). Gimli (my mutt) looks like a toto..lol...there's where I got the dorothy idea. Saturday was a whole-day event in which we had a chance to sit in on different obesity/OH/WLS discussions and lectures/workshops. I had the pleasure of meeting Susan Maria Leach, the author of "Before and after", that was the first and only book I read about gastric bypass and felt a total connection to her as I read her story. She was awesome; had sooo much energy and is a wealth of knowledge for us newbies and our long road ahead. Had her authograph my book, which was all beat-up since I would read it everywhere as a pre-op, and took a pic with her. I'll see about posting it up on here asap :) I sat in on her "cooking with susan maria" session and picked up a few things for when i DECIDE to start cooking..lol. I also sat in on "learning to see the new you"; I specially needed that one. Beto always mentions that he notices my weightloss, and compliments me and, for the life of me, I CAN'T TAKE A COMPLIMENT! I don't specifically see the weightloss, but there are times I look at myself and think "wow, I do look a bit smaller here..or there"..lol. I also sat in on the "Getting to Goal and staying there", which was a good kick in the butt. I also went to "prepare for the longest plateau", which definitely opened my eyes to the rough roads ahead with plateaus and to NOT lose my head when they happen...just riiiide em out. I also went to: "making your tool work for you", which was very good and just needed since it gave a lot of info on vitamins, how to see this whole experience as a process and our surgeries as tools. I tried going to the "taking care of your bones and muscles", but literally walked out of it because it was more of a chiropracting FYI than what I thought it would be (i thought they would go into bone care, calcium, osteo-etc), and lastly went to the "Cooking on the go", which was no very ON THE GO. I guess I was thinking it would be a session on what healthy foods to pick up and grab when you don't have time nor energy to cook. The cooking on the go session was a whole hour on how to make a bean soup! lol....it was cool to grab the menu, but if that's "cooking on the go", then I'm definitely a looooong way from being any type of cook now.lol. I got a few samples of different protein powders, vitamist, and other info that will definitely benefit me in the long run. Reminds me, I have to buy a pedometer, asap to measure how much I do walk a day. Let's see what else: Oh, the whole "food" thing is really unraveling itself. I haven't felt nauseous/sweaty/clammy/etc after eating for about a week now :) I guess it just took time for me and pouchy to get acquainted. Let's just say, he LOVES taco bell crunchy tacos, STILL! I introduced a veggie egg roll this weekend at the convention, with some duck sauce..yuumy. Anywho, lost 3lbs this past week, so the scale is FINALLY moving again after 2wk plateau. So, now, at week 9 (2months), I am down 39lbs :) yaaay!
11/5/04: This whole food situation is definitely looking up. I've been able to have more foods, at small quantities - ofcourse, without having nausea or all that yucky stuff. I've had subway sandwhiches (cold cut trio), and some falafel sandwhich wrap without any problems! Yaaaaay. I'm definitely feeling the vitamins kicking in and having high amounts of energy. I got myself a pedometer to start counting my steps each day, or maybe will just do each week. I'll give it a try and see how much I walk, and then work on a goal # of steps per day and or/week. According to a session I went to at the OH Convention, 10,000 steps per week = weightloss. So, here I go, walking my way to a healthier me. I'm closely coming to my FIRST goal. My first goal is to weigh under 200lbs..I'm at 214 at the moment. My goal is to be under 200 by christmas. It is realistic if I work hard at it and get more exercise into my schedule. Being under 200 would be SWEEEEEET for the holidays; So, in 1 month, I have about 15lbs to lose...definitely managable! :) Wish me luck.
11/8/04: Another week, week 10 down for me. Down 43lbs! I lost 4lbs this week and feeling much better. Had a bad weekend when I try to be smart and try BAD FOODS, but sure enough, my tummy/pouch puts me in the right place.
11/22/04: I just realized that I'm close to losing the big 5-0...when starting this journey, I always thought: If I could only lose 50lbs, I would be in heaven! Well, I'm not in heaven, but I'm definitely not complaining! My baby doggie Precious died this weekend and my heart is broken, but know she is in a better place. It's been hard to deal with, but love her and the puppies she left me and definitely have to keep a smile on my face for my progress and what the future brings :( *tear tear* So, most of my weekend, I was in bed, watching tv, and spending time with Beto...and the occassional cry when I would remember Precious. I lost 2lbs this week, so officially I'm down 47lbs. My starting BMI was 43, and now it's 34! wow...what a few months will do...I have my 3 month post op visit with Dr. Lourie on 11/30. Can't wait to be down 50lbs by then...Gotta go drink some protein and be good this week if I wanna hit that goal! I've noticed I only lose 2lbs a week...grr..wished it was more, but then again, happy that the scale moved at all! So, hopefully will be down 50lbs by the 30th and under 200 before 2005! Small goals, but HUGE for me :) Adios! *luv you precious*
11/29/04: Down 3lbs this week, and finally hit -50! That was a goal I had wanted to hit from the get go and so happy for myself today. I definitely can tell more that the pounds are coming off and that things are sailing along well. I started reading Carnie Wilson's 2 books this weekend: Gut Feelings, and I'm Still Hungry. I started and finished the first one, Gut feelings, this thanksgiving weekend. I definitely liked it and recommend it. It was something I feel I should have read when I was pre-op, but glad I got a chance to get to it and read it now. Her story is different because of her fame, but overall, she went through the whole obesity/food/weight/diets problem that most obese people do. I identified on some levels to her, but overall was taking in her story in and seeing what her perspective on her life, her weight, her decision to have WLS and her experience was. She put obesity and WLS in the forefront of the media, and that is a feat in it of itself. I didn't know she had her surgery broadcasted on the internet in 1999, but only knew of her and her story after she possed for playboy last year. Good for her! :) I will be starting "I'm still hungry" today and think I'll definitely enjoy that one and connect to it more than the first. I definitely wanted to get her whole story, and is why I got the first one as well (I borrowed them from the library, i was so surprised I found them! and had them placed on hold for me..woo hoo). Anywho, things are good, definitely looking forward to reading the 2nd book and just getting an insight to what the heck is up next! I'm at 205 today...down 50lbs, and still a long way to go. I'm still not under 200, but glad I'm losing! Last night was the first time I ever told anyone my weight (aside from docs, medical staff, etc). My boyfriend and I were talking about my weight loss and how I had hit the big 5-0. When I told him I had started my journey at 255 he seemed shocked that i had gotten that big! I was a bit embarrassed, but glad I was able to say that to someone I care for so much. I had never told anyone my weight for being so embarrassed of how out of control it had gotten. I was ashamed and just embarrased of my lack of control. I had shared it with a preop in the past, and on the OH board, but you guys don't count!!! :) So, I'm glad I'm able to share that with Beto now and able to say it out loud without cringing. I still want to be smaller and have a 1- in front of my weight, so the battle continues...but, to be honest, it definitely has gotten ssooooo much easier! I'm not getting as nauseous, making good food decisions, and keeping up with my water and protein. Programming yourself to success - that's the way to do it...soooo, I'll be programming away! :)
12/14/04: -55 so far. After reading messages on OH from people in my same surgery date, I realize I am a slow loser. Grrr. I lose 2lbs a week, 3 on a good week! 4 in a ridiculously great week! 5, um..never/seldom. So, I'm happy about my ittie bittie loss of 2lbs this week (as well). I am exactly at 200lbs...My first major goal has been to be under 200lbs, so, it is right around the corner. If my calculations serve me correctly, I will be 198 next week, and BAM, goal met! :) hehe...Well, I definitely will love to see the scale under 200, and can't wait. This week I started working out. I do walking here and there, but nothing majorly considered a "workout". I got a trial membership for bally's out in montebello and really liked the place. It's a normal gym and all, but I realized I loved working out and working towards looking hot! The scale moving, even just 2lbs a week, is a motivator. I am definitely seeing that I'm fitting nicely into old clothes. I still haven't bought much clothes, and when I do, I realize I always go for the XXL or XXXL and they're too big!!! *yaaaay* I went to buy some gym clothes at target and the nike store, and went straight for the end of the rack = biggest sizes. They definitely would have fit me fine before, but not any more. I ended up getting a size Large! I haven't seen that size in a loooong time, so it was nice getting reacquainted with it. So, I renewed my membership yesterday for 1yr ($102, since I was a member back in 1994) and will hit the gym whenever possible. I'm looking forward to that and to hopefully maximize my weightloss asap! Bye!
12/21/04: *drumroll please* GOAL #1 MET! My goal was to be under 200lbs, hopefully by the holidays. I weighed in this morning at 195! :) I was ecstatic! My lowest, I can remember, is 194 back in 1997 when I was a senior in high school. I still thought I was fat then, but when I look at pics now I would think "i looked pretty okay!" lol. Anywho, I am so happy to finally be under 200lbs!!!! I love it! I definitely am now feeling much better about my appearance, about how my clothes fit, how my diet is going, how the loss is going along. Officially, -60lbs gone forrrreeeevvverrrr! *quoting from the movie Sandlot* Aaaaah, it's a good feeling to be losing and not puking your guts out or dry heaving! I definitely feel that I know what my limits are, what I can or can't have, what i DO have that will make my tummy upset, etc. I'm in a good point in my life, overall. Got accepted to a nursing program (Mount St. Mary's College in Los Angeles, CA), relationship with the BF is going great, hopefully being a home owner in a month or so, and just loving the new me. I definitely want to get new clothes to show off what I've lost, but then again, I want to economize and just wait a bit more till $ is better...thing is, I DONT HAVE A THING TO WEAR!!!! LOL... EVERYTHING IS SO BIG ON ME! I love saying that soooo much! :) I've found old clothes that I fit into NOW and just love that new wardrobe. I got myself some pants at Lerner's NY this last weekend and was ecstatic on how they fit me! Note: I hadn't fit into lerner pants in a long time! Life is good, and I'm happy to be -60 of my former self :) Adios todos!
1/7/05: Happy New Years! 2005 has started off great and looking forward to all my goals and resolutions met and kept! So far, down 63lbs. The last few weeks, weightloss has been at snail's pace (frustrating!) Obviously "lose weight" is on my resolution list, but I now look at it not as a burden I have to DO or else, but as an effort and something I truly look forward to doing. I joined the gym, and now starting to do good workouts :) I mainly start with 30mins of stairclimbers, or treadmill...to warm up, get the party started, and get me moving and sweating. I then use machines with weights to tone up my body as much as I can. I'm still a rookie. Since I got my membership, I've gone about 5times, but after I leave each time, I feel like I put in a great effort at each workout. My eating habits have been very "eh". I don't drink protein drinks anymore, just seems that's emphasized only when you're preop, but try to get as much protein as I can from my choices of food. I've still done fast food since we're still "without home" in our home buying process. We are closing the deal and finishing up escrow, but will be renting out the house to the past owner for the next 2 months. Just sucks not having a kitchen to make up concoctions, etc. Things with my boyfriend are not good, have gotten worse, but have found a civil level in our relationship to just be friends and figure it out when the turmoil has died down. I'm not holding my breath, I guess what happens happens. Overall, for 2005 I'll be dedicating my time to my weight loss, working out, getting in better shape by going to the gym, and getting the best grades I can in my new nursing program, and doing as well as possible at my job. My focus has been lost with personal and family problems, but with a new start in this year, I feel I'm up for the challenging of mending old wounds, figuring out what is best and healthiest for me, and surrounding myself with positive people, energies and situations. Again, a happy new year to all of you :)
1/10/05: 2005 so far has been great to me. I start my nursing school program next week, closed escrow on my new house this week, and down 65lbs :) I definitely have nothing to complain about, instead have plenty to be very thankful for. This week's loss: 2lbs. My usual 2lb drop...I wished it was more!!! lol...everyone wishes it was more, but its a slow process. They don't tell you that in the pamphlet! :) Patience norma, patience. I am at the lowest weight I can remember. My lowest I remembered was 194, and remember exactly when I weighed that. Silly facts: My smallest weight that I can remember was 194 in 1997. I was a senior in high school, and remember going to the family planning center to get birth control pills and condoms for when I "had sex" with my then boyfriend. I was so nervous, went to the clinic to get info on "not getting pregnant" before losing my virginity. I even planned that! lol. I'm such a dork...but sure enough, remember stepping on the scale a few days before losing my virginity, and being 194lbs. lol. Too funny. Anywho, lowest before 194 was 198...I'm now 190 :) Can't wait till I'm 180...170...160....and goal at 150. I know I can do it, just gotta be patient, good with my eating habits and drink lots of water and keep up with my exercise. I haven't done much exercising since we're having lots of rain/storm and just end up staying home. Grrr...excuses excuses. But sure enough, as sooon as the weather gets a little better, my butt is in the gym asap! :) Anywho, no hair loss, dropped 2lbs this week, down 65lbs, and doing good. I've been eating a lot of junk food because we still are staying with the inlaws and ordering out/picking up food, but usually keep it to the regular: yoshinoya chicken bowl with little rice, crunchy taco from taco bell, and sandwhiches from subway or jack in the box :) Take care everyone :)
1/28/05: down 70lbs :) Happy as can be! This whole WLS thing does work after all,doesn't it! lol. This past weekend I went to get some clothes; I've always hated shopping and hated having to always go to the end of the rack to HOPEFULLY find some 20's in the stacks. I loved that Old navy was carrying up to size 22, but when I finally wore size 22's, I knew that was as much as my body could take. This weekend, I walk into Lerner/NY Company clothing store and try on some VERY cute outfits. Ended up getting some nice fitting dress pants, skirt and dressy top, and with a huge smile on my face. I fit into their "L" size for the pants and skirt, and "M" on the top. I tried some of their sizes, and sure enough, I'm at a size 16! When I started this whole WLS adventure, my main 2 goals were to get under 200lbs, which I have (yaaay!) and fit into a size 16! and sure enough, accomplished that too! In my head, these were FAR-REACHING goals, but now that I'm here I am thrilled at what I've accomplished and excited about now getting into smaller sizes! The joy of shopping has returned!!!! :) I just wished I had the extra cash to go with the weight loss! with time..with time $$$$ lol.
I'm now down 70lbs, and starting off, my goal loss was 100lbs (putting me at 155lbs)...but see, NOW that I'm closer to my goal weight, I want to tweak that! After looking at my BMI and the "normal range" for my height, I should be at about 140-150 (depending if I am 5'5 or 5'6)..I'm at like 5'5.5" which makes it weird and have a range of anywhere from 120lbs-145lbs (for 5'5) or 125-150lbs (for 5'6"). Sooo, I'm thinking I want to change my "Target weight" to 145 :) So, I'm now technically 40lbs from Goal...40 MORE TO GO...40 MORE TO GO...40 MORE TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, and gotta make new goals since I already met my 2 main goals (under 200 and size 16). I REALLY like to be a size 12...I remember buying some pants for my sister for xmas (from the GAP) and getting her a size 12 pants and thinking to myself "wow, I wished I could be that small"...:) So...size 12 is my new goal. Hitting 150 would also be a huge thing for me. I don't think I've ever seen 150 on my scale, EEEEVERRRR. I know in high school I was 190ish, and when I was 15yrs old I was about 150 (and that was only after literally starving myself and taking these weird diet pills that got me all wired up, moody, sweaty, just real bad side effects). Since I was going to have a huge "quinceanera" sweet 15 party in my honor, I wanted to look good for the pictures, in my big ol' pretty dress, and wanted to also look "pretty". I saw being "skinny" as being pretty and literally went on a very unhealthy diet which had me eating nothing, drinking lots of water, exercising like a mad man, and diet pills. Sure enough, I lost the weight, but eventually just gained it back. I lost it for the party, but my body definitely took a toll. Looking at my health now, no wonder I have hypothyroidism and problems with my slow metabolism.
3/9/05: I'm finally getting the comments of my weight loss. Go figure, I'm now down to 169 and FINALLY getting the "oh, you look great, how much weight have you lost"...lol. About friggin time! I was thinking it was all in my head or something! I've definitely noticed it myself, but I hadn't gotten any major comments till now. People at work have been telling me more often and it feels great. I'm down to a medium in pants at Lerner NY clothing stores (which is where I mainly shop for work and nice/going out clothes), top is still in Large and my clothing size is a 14. I love it! In february (this last month) i lost a lot weight than usual and I think it's me going to the gym and giving those 2-3hr long workouts...love it :) Thing is, my eating habits have gotten pretty wacked out. Since I was staying over at the boyfriend's place, I was eating junk food and not eating the 3 meals, not drinking the water, etc. I was down to 165 mid last week and LOVED IT EVEN MORE...but when I weighed in this last monday morning, after the weekend from hell in which I didn't watch what I ate, I was up to 169. That's a 4lbs gain and 1lb gain from my last monday weigh in. GRRRR. I continue to drink while I eat, and I know that's why I got the weight gain. Mind you, I lose 1-2lbs on a regular each week, and to have to note a gain of this week SUCKED! I have since told myself i need to re-evaluate my eating habits, drink more water/liquids, and make better choices in food and exercising. I hadn't been on the cali OH board, but back on it on a more regular basis. Read about this "new habit" thing Mizz Marta was doing and promised myself I'll be exercising/walking, etc. 30min minimum a day! I'll get my lazy butt up 30mins earlier and walk on the threadmill as I watch the morning news, or right before bed. I can do this...just will take a little dedication on my part. I've also stopped the diet coke drinking, I've been bad. Definitely not drinking as much soda as before surgery, but the fact that I'm drinking them now is NOT GOOD. Love the carbonation and the taste, but nothing tastes as good as thin (or thinner!) feels! :) I'm back on this damn horse and will get into the century club ASAP! I'm only 14lbs from 100lbs lost!!!!! So close...and I wanna be there ASAP...and I will. Let's see, I'm currently at 169, start weight was 255, so thus a loss of -86lbs! Good ridance! My goal weight is 140, thus my total loss would be 115lbs when I get to goal...I'm 74.7% of the way there! Woo hoo!!!! I love this! 29lbs from goal, and 14 from the century club. I love this sooo much! Weird how your head still messes with you; i still see myself as a size 18, 20 and over 200lbs, and here I am, smaller than when I was in High school and in a size 14, soon to be size 12. By my birthday, I want to be at goal already...July 30th is just a few months ago and have 30lbs more to lose by then...I am DEFINITELY up for that challenge!!!!
3/25/05: All's well, to report. Down to 165 and feeling great. I haven't been exercising as much, but have been good with the water intake and vitamins. I still can't do more than 64oz, so my goal is to at least hit 64 - anymore after that is a definite plus! I just made my appointment for my 6month post op check up with Dr. Lourie, but disappointed to hear that I won't be getting any bloodwork done. A lot of bariatric patients take easy absorbed vitamins, sprays, etc. I only take over the counter vitamins from Target! I take 3 multivitamins, 2 calcium and 3 iron a day (plus my synthroid med for my hypothyroidism). The pills are huge, but I don't really mind it. A pill is a pill to me. I heard horror stories about pills getting lodged and being unabsorbed and stuck in organs. I don't seem to be having a problem with it, but was very curious to see what my levels were, overall. The nurse said that the only thing they would check is my iron, since I reported that I was feeling a little tired. I highly doubt it is due to the iron levels, just me being a dork and not getting in exercise and running on fumes. I go to work from 8-5pm, then speed to class at 5:30pm. I'm there till 8:30pm and then get home and eat dinner that late. It's not good for me, i bet, but that's the only time I get a chance to get a decent meal in. I haven't had problems with eating in a long time, but DID throw up/gag last week...but that was of my own wrong doing. I wanted to stay up and study, so bought a "fat free" coffee at the gas station and a HUGE COOKIE. Um, hello norma! The cookie was bigger than the size of my whole face! lol. If that doesn't say a lot, don't know what would! I ate half of it...loved it! I'm not one for sugar cravings, but that night i was a cravin' it too much! Maybe if i had eaten it slower or chewed slower, maybe it wouldnt have been as deadly as it was...but sure enough, it hit me hard. Had to go dry heave for a few minutes. Didn't throw up, never have since surgery (throwing up, meaning that i gag and food comes out...lol...sorry for the details). I always only dry heave and throw up spit and bubbly stuff. Did that this time, and sure enough, felt 10x better later on. I knew it would happen and I still did it. I needed that sugar craving, even with the consequences. But, the way i look at it, i would have eaten 3 of those puppies before surgery. This time, i ate only 1/2 of it and coffee. Weird frame of mind, but that's the way I've approached this surgery. I definitely have cut down on things A LOT, but i don't completely deprive myself from things I want. If i want it bad enough, I'll have a few bites and that'll fix the craving and make me happy. Overall, i don't want to feel that I'm on a life long diet and hating every moment of it. I'm not in a "diet", this is how it is now and have to make the best of it. And if it means taking a bite from a burger here and there, or having a sip of soda, etc. then that's how it is. Limits are there, my stomach is my tool and I can find a common and balance ground to it all. I love that about this surgery. I love that it has changed my whole point of thought and mindframe to food. I don't live to eat, instead i eat to live. Before, food was an event. No more. It is an event in the way that I think of food. I give the menu a second thought and consider things that my tummy will like and not like. I don't JUMP at the first thing that my head and taste buds THINK will be good and not care about calories, fat, carbs, etc. I find myself READING labels, reading menu contents, preparations, etc. If i'm craving some fish, I have fish, but as soon as I see that it is FRIED, i give it a 2nd thought. The before norma would NOT have done things like that. I was cautionate with my intake and didnt eat too many sweets, etc, but fried things were my biggest worries. I still have them, shouldnt, but i do! Takes the edge off. I haven't been drinking diet coke anymore, and I'm good :) I found a sugar free lemonade mix at target that's pretty good. I really just needed something different. Crystal lite isn't my thing, tastes EH. I wanted something different and the lemonade, pink lemonade and the arizona sugar free tea mixes i found are great. I figure I'll eventually get bored of those as well, but till then, I'm good :) Anywho, gotta get to work and get this friday over with. Can't wait till the weekend :) Adios!
4/20/05: -97lbs, weighing in at 158...you would think i'd be swinging off the chandelere (if I had one) and just as happy as can be with my weight loss....but...I don't see it. I get comments at work, from people I haven't seen, and just from everyone I see and in contact with. I don't tell them about my having RNY or anything, don't have a particular reason, just don't want themt to know my business. My clothes don't fit, I know I'm smaller, but I still don't see it. I see the scale circle around 158, but it doesn't register that I'm the smallest Ive ever been since, EVER! I didn't weigh this much in high school, so I'm assuming i was 150's in junior high, but still, not even that puts it in perspective. I still see the same me in the mirror. The same me that has big ol' thighs and wide hips, and a tummy, and a chubby face, and...plain just fat. I know I'm not as fat as I used to be, but I don't see a "thin norma" and don't think I ever will. I question if I really look that much smaller or if i've really lost the weight and realize I have, but a part of me still doesn't get it. I'm thankful for my progress thus far, just wished I saw it to its full effect and not have my image distorted by my psychological lunacy! :) Now I regret not taking pictures each month. I took pictures initially (the night before surgery) but never really took month to month pictures. The only thing I've done is weigh myself every week, and even now, I don't keep up with that as much as I should. I went to the gym this past weekend and definitely could see a difference in my body when I exercised and checked myself out in the thousand mirrors they have, for every angle you can think of! lol. My body has changed, but my mind hasn't...too weird...
4/25/05: -100lbs today :) From 255 to 155...*tear tear* Gotta get my butt in the gym and get to goal ASAP! 15more lbs till then. Here's the post I made on the CA board this afternoon:
eventful monday: -100lbs
Original Post by Norma G at 2:22 PM PST on 04/25/2005
Los Angeles, CA - RNY (08/30/2004)
Thinking that the last stubborn lbs wouldn't go anywhere, any time soon, I figured my stepping on the scale this monday morning would be very uneventful...
I'm proud to say that I have officially lost 100lbs after making one of the best decisions of my life...One hundred pounds...wow...
It's been an amazing 8months and I look forward to getting to goal ASAP. Thank you all for being a breath of freshly REAL air. Although I don't post as much as I did initially, your words, experiences, journal entries, laughs, insight and just plain real-ness have made it a kick ass experience! I look forward to being a more constant poster on here (and will change my profile pic ASAP! lol...).
100lbs gone! YAAAAY!
Norma G.
5/10/05: feeling a bit under the weather, and with finals at school, just not feeling at 100%. But, scale has been good to me :) I have noticed that I eat sooo much more. I keep asking "what's for dinner?" and I'm definitely more hungry than in the past. But at the same time, I'm not plateauing or anything. My metabolism must be doing okay and i feel great. I do still eat TOO fast. I think the times I have gotten sick or an upset stomach are because I eat tooooo fast. I went out for sushi this week. I have never been able to eat rolls because it would make my tummy upset with all the rice. Sure enough, had myself some sushi rolls and was fine...like old times. 1) that's great because i love sushi..yellow tail, salmon, spicy tuna, yummy..but..at the same time I have to keep a watch on my eating habits. Weighing 150 is mighty nice, and I will NOT gain any pounds back. In my whole journey, the most I've gained was a pound. I've always lost steadily and till I get to my goal, I'm not doing anything to saboutage myself :) You can bet on that. As for my goal weight..I had it at 150, then changed it to 145, and now has been 138...but, may bring it down even further. I'm still a thick girl at 150! lol. I am!!!! I feel like I can still lose 20lbs more and be okay. I'm not out to look like a crack-head druggy/skinny, lol but definitely don't wanna still look thick! I've been thick all my life! lol. Cmon now, gotta look good. I definitely will look into plastic surgery after my 1 yr anniversary... Things aren't that bad; because i lost so steadily (2-3lbs a week) my skin was able to catch up with the weight loss just fine. Ofcourse, it's not as nice and flat as I'd like, but it's fine. Some loose skin, but pretty much I see it cause I know it's there. It's fine.
5/23/05: Stopping in to post my progress. Loss this week was 5lbs...can you believe that, 5lbs in one week...I dunno what happened. After my week of no loss and gaining 2lbs, I drop down 5lbs...This thing is working after all. Weighing in at 145, I'm 5lbs away from being the weight on my driver's license. This weekend was also filled with a big WOW for me. I went shopping for clothes with my friend Melissa. I ended getting some FABULOUS clothes in smaller sizes. I'm down to size 10pants, and even bought a squirt in size 8!!!!!!! I also screamed when it fit. I had tried the size 10 and thought, hm, a little roomie but i doubt i'll fit a smaller size...I tried the 8 and bam, perfect. Could it really be happening, me in single digit clothing...hehe..I love it :) This week I'm hitting the gym and upping my walking and water. I noticed I dropped 5lbs after i started walking again during lunch and started sticking to my 4 bottles of 16oz water. I went to buy a sportsbra so I can get to the gym tonight. My other sportsbra is huge now. Oh well, the twins are shrinking away, but i'd rather be flat chested and smaller in size, than big boobs and big everything else! lol.
5/24/05: I was thinking about what my goal weight should be. When I started out this whole journey, it was 155 (that's when i was 255..i figured a 100lb loss would be perfect). 155 came and went and I'm now 10lbs under that, weighing in at 145. I feel good, but I still feel that I'm on the thicker side. I've always been thick, even a little muscular. I have big ol' hips and butt, and always been thick overall. So, after punching in my height and weight and getting my BMI, I realized I'm in the NORMAL RANGE. Wow...normal norma at last :) That's great, but is it bad that I still want to continue losing. The normal range goes from BMI 18.5-24.9, I'm currently at 23.4. With a BMI of 18.5 (minimum in normal range), I would weigh 115 (max bmi of 24.9 puts me at 154). So, for me to still be in the minimum side of the normal range, I can go down to 120s, easily. My goal, aside from 155 was to be at 140 (I'm 5lbs from that) :) Yay for me! But I can see that I still can lose about 20 more pounds and look/feel fine. My new goal is 138, since that would be a loss of 100% of my excess weight (according to OH). Me at 138 would be SWEEEET...I just know myself and I know that my goal THEN will be 135...and when I reach 135, it may be 130...and down to 120's. I guess it gave me peace of mind that even at the smallest weight that i'd want to be (120), I would still be in the normal range. My realistic goal weight is 138-135, but my DREAM goal weight would be 120-125. I wouldn't be underweight at my dream goal weight, but at the same time feel guilty that I want to lose more weight. My mom gives me comments like "u shouldnt lose anymore weight" or "the incredible shrinking woman"..hehe.
7/18/05: It's been about 2 months since I last posted. In the last month and a half, I've only lost ~5lbs, which has bummed me out, but at the same time, haven't really given much thought to. I feel that my body is at a place it likes and feel extremely healthy. I'm 5'5, 5'6 and at 140. I definitely still want to lose more weight, but not going completely out of my way to do so. But, today, I realize that I'll be turning 26 in 2weeks and want to be at my goal weight of 138. 138 is special because, when initially starting this journey, I remember inputing my information into the obesityhelp.com website and looking to see what 100% of my excess weight would put me at...and, voila, 138 was it. I remember thinking, "138..oh my gawd, I WISH!". Well, I'm 2lbs from that...crazy, isn't it. So, for now, my goal for 7/30/05 is to be 138. I haven't been very proactive about my weight loss, so today, I'll be going back to some basics...more water, my vitamins (which i have been very bad about for the last month) and exercising. I just walked 20mins during lunch, and planning on taking another 10min walk in the afternoon. My goal is to do 1 hour of walking a day. I'll get home tonight and go walking with gimli for another 30mins to unwind and just relax before hitting the books tonight. Nursing school has been hard, but I've been doing okay. Just hate being a B student...i was those A's! I also FINALLY moved into my new house (well, the house isn't new..built in 1977...lol..but its new to me!). I love it! I love being a home owner, although it can be very overwhelming and just so exhausting (unpacking, painting, etc). Life is good and I love it. I just have to work on me being less stressed out and just taking in the view :) Till later!
7/26/05: Doing well. Been eating a lot! I can eat a whole microwave lunch, which worries me. My loss has almost completely stopped. I'm down to 139, which bumbs me out. I want to lose more, but haven't really done anything about it. I will though. I suck at drinking my water, haven't done vitamins in so long, and no exercise. No wonder I'm not losing! Classes have kept me stressed and just overall too tired for anything else. I'll have Aug/summer off (1month vacation! yaaay!) I promise to be better. My goal for end of august is to have lost 2lbs each week = 8lbs lost, which would put me at 131...wow...I'd love that. My goal at the moment continues to be 138 by my bday, 7/30, which i see as taking place! and 131 before my 1yr anniversary...8/30. I can do this. I'll try my darnest. Have finals this week, so will definitely start after the whole stress level has decreased some. TTYL :)
8/5/05: I'm starting to hate the number 140. I can't seem to break my plateau and stuck at 140. I have the usual concerns: is this it? Am i done losing? But, i've read/heard it before and know that I can still jump start it again if i go back to basics and be good! I haven't been, so can't blame anyone but myself. Grrrr. I still feel like I need to lose ~10-15 more lbs. I still feel a bit thick at 140 and carry most of my weight on my lower body. I'm thinking about looking into Plastic surgery, but only if covered by insurance. Can't afford it otherwise with a home mortgage and paying for nursing school! yikes! Oh, having my housewarming party this coming weekend. Last minute thing, having friends and family over - definitely looking forward to tomorrow/saturday. Hopefully i get nice housewarming gifts! hehe. I need to spruce up the house, it looks very BLAH. I will, eventually. But yeah, 140 sucks! But then again, I'm down 115 and happy about that. I'm coming up to my 1yr anniversary at the end of this month. I WISH i could weigh 135 by then. If i want it bad enough, I'll need to work at it (talking about work, gotta WORK OUT..havent been to the gym in months, haven't done any major exercise in MONTHS!). Anywho, hope everyone is doing well and that the scale is being good to all. Still at 140 here, so hope to post again when I'm a non-140lb person :P
adios!
8/9/05: No more
About Me
Before & After
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