Me1st
Tomorrow is the big step
May 17, 2010
Going to my first seminar tomorrow and the the following day I get to see the doctor. My husband is making this trip with me although I almost wish I was going by myself, having another person by my side could be good. Yet, I just feeling this is something I need to tackle alone. He has had 2 sisters go through this so he already thinks he knows everything about it...hopefully he will learn that the process is different for everyone. Fingers are crossed...hearing how many had to wait for pre-op weight loss and some insurance companies stalling...makes me worry. I know what I need, I know my body!!
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Appointment Made
May 13, 2010
Next week my first step to finding my thinner self. I have made my seminar appointment and the following day, I meet the Dr. Since the office is located 2 hours from my home and the appointments are in the late evening and early morning I have arranged for a hotel. No backing out now! My husband might not be able to join me due to work, so this first step will be by myself. I am excited yet fearful that it will backfire- I have heard it is not easy to get Idaho Insurances to pay for it.
Today, I planted some plants in my veggie garden and I thought humm this time next year I could be doing this without hurting my back from all the bending over with all this extra weight on my bones.
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Today, I planted some plants in my veggie garden and I thought humm this time next year I could be doing this without hurting my back from all the bending over with all this extra weight on my bones.
Insurance
May 13, 2010
I pay $350/mo for my health insurance and it is a group plan. My spouse told me yesturday that his employeer maybe cutting back on providing health insurance to employees in order to make it through a rough finanical time. This is very hard to except since I got this far. If I have no insurance there is no way I can do this procedure and I know my health will suffer. I am 351 lbs at 34 and I can see my life getting shorter the longer I stay this heavy. people do not understand it is not as easy as going to the gym and eating healthly when you reach this weight.
I can honestly say for the last 2 weeks of eating fruits, veggies, and fish while walking daily I have not dropped any weight..I am trying and this news just made me more depressed. Its not confirmed yet so I am still making my appointment today!!
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I can honestly say for the last 2 weeks of eating fruits, veggies, and fish while walking daily I have not dropped any weight..I am trying and this news just made me more depressed. Its not confirmed yet so I am still making my appointment today!!
The first step and its a scary one..
May 10, 2010
I have been wanting to make this step for awhile.
Recently, I took a trip and the looks from people as I was stuffed in my airplane seat almost made me break down and cry. I hoped no one would sit in the middle seat and want to put the arm rest down. I think I have been telling myself that I am not as big as I really am. Some pictures were taken of me on vacation and it was a shocker to see what I really look like. I have always been the person behind the camera snaping away and taking face shots of myself which did not reveal my true size.
Today, I saw my doctor and he said, "Why wait, I will give you a referal today". My reality has hit me in the face tonight- I am 351 lbs and 5'7 at 34 years of age. Mother's Day just past and my husband and I went hiking, I pushed myself and pushed myself. I made it on the trail and back. I never saw anyone else on the trail close to my size and I felt the looks.
My husband who is 6'1 at 195 lbs has been trying to eat healthier and even bought a scale to weigh himself. I look at that damn thing every day and I hate the fact that in order to weight myself I have to watch the damn thing go around and back to the start because it does not have my actualy weight number listed.
I was heavy in my early 20's but lost 150lbs on my own, I just can seem to do it 10 years later. I need this or my weight will kill me! It is scary to think my insurance could say no....and then I would have to appeal- I hope it goes easy and I do not have to fight them!! I am not proud that it has come to this...I am feeling very ashamed that I let myself get to 351 lbs!!
1 comment
Recently, I took a trip and the looks from people as I was stuffed in my airplane seat almost made me break down and cry. I hoped no one would sit in the middle seat and want to put the arm rest down. I think I have been telling myself that I am not as big as I really am. Some pictures were taken of me on vacation and it was a shocker to see what I really look like. I have always been the person behind the camera snaping away and taking face shots of myself which did not reveal my true size.
Today, I saw my doctor and he said, "Why wait, I will give you a referal today". My reality has hit me in the face tonight- I am 351 lbs and 5'7 at 34 years of age. Mother's Day just past and my husband and I went hiking, I pushed myself and pushed myself. I made it on the trail and back. I never saw anyone else on the trail close to my size and I felt the looks.
My husband who is 6'1 at 195 lbs has been trying to eat healthier and even bought a scale to weigh himself. I look at that damn thing every day and I hate the fact that in order to weight myself I have to watch the damn thing go around and back to the start because it does not have my actualy weight number listed.
I was heavy in my early 20's but lost 150lbs on my own, I just can seem to do it 10 years later. I need this or my weight will kill me! It is scary to think my insurance could say no....and then I would have to appeal- I hope it goes easy and I do not have to fight them!! I am not proud that it has come to this...I am feeling very ashamed that I let myself get to 351 lbs!!
