lonake
My Soul Looks Back In Wonder..........
Jan 12, 2010
Hello all,
The last time I posted was July 2007. On August 12, 2007, my beloved baby boy Pfc. Alan Jerome Austin was KIA in Afghanistan while serving in the Army. I will NEVER be the same. I forgot that yesterday was the third anniversary of my Lap Band surgery. I've lost, gained, and lost some more. Let me tell you, that lately, not a day goes by that I don't wish I could eat like I used to, just to feel the comfort that food gave me. But that feeling soon passes, and I remember the pride in my son's eyes when he saw me the for the first time after my surgery. He was my best friend, my greatest cheerleader, my confidant, a great brother, a fantastic son. Now he's a soldier for Christ, and I am more proud of him than ever. I miss him immensely, I grieve for Alan, that his Autistic brother Matthew will never have him in his life again, that my Daddy does'nt have his best buddy to hang out with anymore. But more than this......my Mother's heart is broken. There is a hole there that will never be filled again. I still wait for his phone call every Sunday.
I'm going to post more now, mainly because I need to. To encorage pre and post-ops, and to help others who may have experienced that loss that I have. God Bless!
Rhonda
Pre-op: 330 / Present: 215 / Goal: 165
0 comments
The last time I posted was July 2007. On August 12, 2007, my beloved baby boy Pfc. Alan Jerome Austin was KIA in Afghanistan while serving in the Army. I will NEVER be the same. I forgot that yesterday was the third anniversary of my Lap Band surgery. I've lost, gained, and lost some more. Let me tell you, that lately, not a day goes by that I don't wish I could eat like I used to, just to feel the comfort that food gave me. But that feeling soon passes, and I remember the pride in my son's eyes when he saw me the for the first time after my surgery. He was my best friend, my greatest cheerleader, my confidant, a great brother, a fantastic son. Now he's a soldier for Christ, and I am more proud of him than ever. I miss him immensely, I grieve for Alan, that his Autistic brother Matthew will never have him in his life again, that my Daddy does'nt have his best buddy to hang out with anymore. But more than this......my Mother's heart is broken. There is a hole there that will never be filled again. I still wait for his phone call every Sunday.
I'm going to post more now, mainly because I need to. To encorage pre and post-ops, and to help others who may have experienced that loss that I have. God Bless!
Rhonda
Pre-op: 330 / Present: 215 / Goal: 165
Chuggin' Along...(con't)
Jul 05, 2007
Okay, I'm back. Like I said, I'm just happy to be able to do some things I haven't been able to do in YEARS! I know this might sound gross, but I'm also looking forward to taking bubble baths instead of showers. Pre-op, I was afraid to get into the tub because my knees hurt so bad that I thought I would get stuck in the tub! Sorry for being brutally honest....but I know that somebody knows what the heck I'm talking about and can relate! (smile)
I got filled up again two weeks ago, so now I'm at 3.3. I've lost 10 more pounds! I can only eat one good meal a day, because I stay full so much longer than before, but that is just fine with me. But get this.....I have a question...does anybody sometimes miss their old belly, but not their old body? Here's what I mean...sometimes I want a certain thing to eat, but I can't have it, because my "tool" won't take it. I only regret it for a moment though..because like the card in my purse says...."Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"
Love you all,
Peace and Blessings,
Rhonda
305/258/ Goal: 170
I got filled up again two weeks ago, so now I'm at 3.3. I've lost 10 more pounds! I can only eat one good meal a day, because I stay full so much longer than before, but that is just fine with me. But get this.....I have a question...does anybody sometimes miss their old belly, but not their old body? Here's what I mean...sometimes I want a certain thing to eat, but I can't have it, because my "tool" won't take it. I only regret it for a moment though..because like the card in my purse says...."Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"
Love you all,
Peace and Blessings,
Rhonda
305/258/ Goal: 170
Chuggin' Along....
Jul 05, 2007
Hello All,
I decided to post today because I discovered something yesterday that I haven't been able to do in a long time. I was sitting in a chair at my friend's house, and all of the sudden, I felt the urge to cross my legs. Well, the "fat girl" in my head said...."yeah go ahead and try....your friends will have to pry your legs loose with a crowbar!" I chuckled to myself and said...."oh well, I'll never know until I try." So I waited until no one was looking at me, and I crossed my legs at the knee!!!!!!! Whooooo Hoooooo!!!!!!! It didn't hurt, and I even un-crossed them with no effort! So there I sat, looking like a real lady, with my legs crossed. (Now please, friends, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that only ladies cross their legs, I am just excited that I can)!!!
More later.......brb!
I decided to post today because I discovered something yesterday that I haven't been able to do in a long time. I was sitting in a chair at my friend's house, and all of the sudden, I felt the urge to cross my legs. Well, the "fat girl" in my head said...."yeah go ahead and try....your friends will have to pry your legs loose with a crowbar!" I chuckled to myself and said...."oh well, I'll never know until I try." So I waited until no one was looking at me, and I crossed my legs at the knee!!!!!!! Whooooo Hoooooo!!!!!!! It didn't hurt, and I even un-crossed them with no effort! So there I sat, looking like a real lady, with my legs crossed. (Now please, friends, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that only ladies cross their legs, I am just excited that I can)!!!
More later.......brb!
Yabba Dabba Doo!!!!
Jun 11, 2007
Hello All,
Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've been super busy! My son came home last month from Afghanistan for two weeks, and I spoiled him rotten. It was like having a new baby in the house. I thought for sure while he was here that I would gain weight, but fortunately I didn't!! I've actually lost 6 more pounds since my last fill. I am down to 262 pounds, and I feel lovely!
One of my co-workers who had the RNY, gave me some of her clothes, and two pairs of the pants she gave me were a size 20. I looked at those pants for two weeks before I got brave enough to try them on. So this past Sunday, I was getting my clothes ready for the work week, tried them on, and they FIT!!!! Whoo Hoooo!!!!! Wearing a size 20 was one of my first weight loss goals after my surgery, and I made it!!! I just have to praise GOD!!!
I just started mall walking again yesterday, and I was so sore this morning. But I feel a lot better that I can walk and breathe at the same time, a wonderful change from my pre-op body. At my last doctor's appointment, I got filled up to 3.0, and I feel major restriction. There are some days I can eat meat or chicken, and some days I can't. I have had to leave eggs totally alone now as well, because for some reason, they make me sick. But that's really okay..... I can still eat, get full and stay full longer. That in itself is a major blessing!
I'll post again, after my next appointment. Hope you all are doing well and I will continue to keep you all in prayer.
Much Love,
Rhonda
Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've been super busy! My son came home last month from Afghanistan for two weeks, and I spoiled him rotten. It was like having a new baby in the house. I thought for sure while he was here that I would gain weight, but fortunately I didn't!! I've actually lost 6 more pounds since my last fill. I am down to 262 pounds, and I feel lovely!
One of my co-workers who had the RNY, gave me some of her clothes, and two pairs of the pants she gave me were a size 20. I looked at those pants for two weeks before I got brave enough to try them on. So this past Sunday, I was getting my clothes ready for the work week, tried them on, and they FIT!!!! Whoo Hoooo!!!!! Wearing a size 20 was one of my first weight loss goals after my surgery, and I made it!!! I just have to praise GOD!!!
I just started mall walking again yesterday, and I was so sore this morning. But I feel a lot better that I can walk and breathe at the same time, a wonderful change from my pre-op body. At my last doctor's appointment, I got filled up to 3.0, and I feel major restriction. There are some days I can eat meat or chicken, and some days I can't. I have had to leave eggs totally alone now as well, because for some reason, they make me sick. But that's really okay..... I can still eat, get full and stay full longer. That in itself is a major blessing!
I'll post again, after my next appointment. Hope you all are doing well and I will continue to keep you all in prayer.
Much Love,
Rhonda
Third Time's a Charm!
Apr 18, 2007
Hello All,
Well, I made it through to my third fill and it feels sooo good. I know it sounds weird, but I like the fact that EVERYTHING I eat or drink now gives me a little discomfort going down. I don't mind because its a reminder that I have this "tool" and I need to continue to use it to my advantage. I lost 6 more pounds according to the scale at my surgeon's office, but by my scale at home, it was 9 pounds. I was happy anyway, because I know I'm still losing. Last month was really hard for me, though I'm not sure why. I got filled up to 2.7cc's this time and I couldn't feel it immediately. I started to get concerned, until the next day when I was able to have my first meal with my new fill. Ugh!!! I felt all of that restriction, and I was like.....WOW!!
I can hardly wait to see what my weight loss will be for this month. I can barely eat more than two SMALL meals a day, I stay fuller longer, which for me has been a major issue since this surgery. Since my fill, I have lost 3 more pounds and I am sooooo happy. I am also buying less food, which offers less of a temptation versus last month. I just have to thank GOD for the blessing of this tool!
Thank you all for allowing me to share....
Luv ya'll,
Rhonda
305/270 - Goal 165?
Well, I made it through to my third fill and it feels sooo good. I know it sounds weird, but I like the fact that EVERYTHING I eat or drink now gives me a little discomfort going down. I don't mind because its a reminder that I have this "tool" and I need to continue to use it to my advantage. I lost 6 more pounds according to the scale at my surgeon's office, but by my scale at home, it was 9 pounds. I was happy anyway, because I know I'm still losing. Last month was really hard for me, though I'm not sure why. I got filled up to 2.7cc's this time and I couldn't feel it immediately. I started to get concerned, until the next day when I was able to have my first meal with my new fill. Ugh!!! I felt all of that restriction, and I was like.....WOW!!
I can hardly wait to see what my weight loss will be for this month. I can barely eat more than two SMALL meals a day, I stay fuller longer, which for me has been a major issue since this surgery. Since my fill, I have lost 3 more pounds and I am sooooo happy. I am also buying less food, which offers less of a temptation versus last month. I just have to thank GOD for the blessing of this tool!
Thank you all for allowing me to share....
Luv ya'll,
Rhonda
305/270 - Goal 165?
Restriction Is A Many Splendored Thing.....
Mar 20, 2007
Hello all,
Well I got my second fill and it feels good. It is a better than I thought it would be. I can feel EVERYTHING going down, which helps me tremendously. I have also noticed how tight my band is in the morning hours before I've had anything to eat or drink. Getting my fill at the hospital was better than I thought it would be, because they could see on the screen how food was passing through to my pouch. I liked the fact that the doctor didn't have to "dig" around and find the port in order to increase my fill. I found out that the port had turned sideways due to my weight loss! The doctor told me that the more weight I lose, the more the port will move and might be harder to fill sometimes. But if I have to go to the hospital every time, I don't care, as long as I continue to lose!
I got some great news last night. One of my friends got approved for surgery! I was so flattered that she chose me to be one of the first people she called with her good news! Good luck and God bless, Leslie!
As I said before, I'm still getting used to the psychological effects of this surgery. I am now wearing a size 24 and some size 22's. I still have not bought any new clothes, and I won't until I get down to at least a size 18. I went shopping for undergarments last week and that was a total joke....depressed the heck out of me. Why is EVERY bra for sale on earth PADDED? I don't need anything EXTRA. God has blessed me with enough, thank you very much! (smile)
Well I'll keep you all posted as I am able....you all take care and may God bless!
Luv,
Rhonda
305/289/275 Goal: 155
Well I got my second fill and it feels good. It is a better than I thought it would be. I can feel EVERYTHING going down, which helps me tremendously. I have also noticed how tight my band is in the morning hours before I've had anything to eat or drink. Getting my fill at the hospital was better than I thought it would be, because they could see on the screen how food was passing through to my pouch. I liked the fact that the doctor didn't have to "dig" around and find the port in order to increase my fill. I found out that the port had turned sideways due to my weight loss! The doctor told me that the more weight I lose, the more the port will move and might be harder to fill sometimes. But if I have to go to the hospital every time, I don't care, as long as I continue to lose!
I got some great news last night. One of my friends got approved for surgery! I was so flattered that she chose me to be one of the first people she called with her good news! Good luck and God bless, Leslie!
As I said before, I'm still getting used to the psychological effects of this surgery. I am now wearing a size 24 and some size 22's. I still have not bought any new clothes, and I won't until I get down to at least a size 18. I went shopping for undergarments last week and that was a total joke....depressed the heck out of me. Why is EVERY bra for sale on earth PADDED? I don't need anything EXTRA. God has blessed me with enough, thank you very much! (smile)
Well I'll keep you all posted as I am able....you all take care and may God bless!
Luv,
Rhonda
305/289/275 Goal: 155
2nd Fill
Mar 07, 2007
Hello All,
Okay, today I go in for my second fill. I am dreading stepping on that scale, even though I have been really careful about my eating. I've lost 4 pounds since my first fill. I have also become something I never thought I would become.....a mall walker! It helped me lose 3 additional pounds in a week, so I am happy about that. Sorry if any guys are reading this, but I only walked one day this week because of my menstral cycle. I have fibroids and have a very heavy flow, so exercise makes it and the cramps worse. I enjoy walking in the mall, but I have to be careful not to always bring money with me, because I ALWAYS see something I want to buy! I look in the store windows and visualize myself in the smaller clothes hanging there.
I have given away all of my 32, 30, 28, and 26 size clothes, and let me tell you....that was hard. I still have the mindset that I'm going to need those clothes again, but the devil is a LIAR. Outside of the psycological aspects of this surgery, I feel so much better. I like the idea of not buying so much food, like that I'm not hungry ALL the time, like not having acid reflux anymore. Some things I don't like, but I expected....people who know you had the surgery, acting like the "food police!"..and people continuously asking you, "so how much weight have you lost?" I don't mind peopls asking questions about my surgery for information purposes, but most people are just plain nosey.
I really need to get new underwear.....I almost lost the ones I wore yesterday from under my dress! This is a good feeling and a bad feeling at the same time! hahaha! This morning I tried on a smaller bra, and I almost screamed when it fit around my body! Now the cup size is something totally different! (smile) I'm still discovering foods that don't go well with my band, such as raw fruits vegetables. I can eat them, but they have to be very soft. I'm still too scared to eat rice or hot cereal because of the incident with the grits I had before. But I can eat noodles and potatoes. I try to stay away from beef as well, because it seems to get slightly "stuck"
I'll post again later....I want to say hello and May God Bless to all my friends and supporters. May we all continue to stay on the "losing side!!"
Rhonda
305/289/280 Goal: 155
Okay, today I go in for my second fill. I am dreading stepping on that scale, even though I have been really careful about my eating. I've lost 4 pounds since my first fill. I have also become something I never thought I would become.....a mall walker! It helped me lose 3 additional pounds in a week, so I am happy about that. Sorry if any guys are reading this, but I only walked one day this week because of my menstral cycle. I have fibroids and have a very heavy flow, so exercise makes it and the cramps worse. I enjoy walking in the mall, but I have to be careful not to always bring money with me, because I ALWAYS see something I want to buy! I look in the store windows and visualize myself in the smaller clothes hanging there.
I have given away all of my 32, 30, 28, and 26 size clothes, and let me tell you....that was hard. I still have the mindset that I'm going to need those clothes again, but the devil is a LIAR. Outside of the psycological aspects of this surgery, I feel so much better. I like the idea of not buying so much food, like that I'm not hungry ALL the time, like not having acid reflux anymore. Some things I don't like, but I expected....people who know you had the surgery, acting like the "food police!"..and people continuously asking you, "so how much weight have you lost?" I don't mind peopls asking questions about my surgery for information purposes, but most people are just plain nosey.
I really need to get new underwear.....I almost lost the ones I wore yesterday from under my dress! This is a good feeling and a bad feeling at the same time! hahaha! This morning I tried on a smaller bra, and I almost screamed when it fit around my body! Now the cup size is something totally different! (smile) I'm still discovering foods that don't go well with my band, such as raw fruits vegetables. I can eat them, but they have to be very soft. I'm still too scared to eat rice or hot cereal because of the incident with the grits I had before. But I can eat noodles and potatoes. I try to stay away from beef as well, because it seems to get slightly "stuck"
I'll post again later....I want to say hello and May God Bless to all my friends and supporters. May we all continue to stay on the "losing side!!"
Rhonda
305/289/280 Goal: 155
About Me
Spring, TX
Location
45.7
BMI
Surgery
01/11/2007
Surgery Date
Jul 26, 2002
Member Since
