lisainphilly

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Last night my beloved black lab went missing.  We looked for her everywhere, even went to PACCA.  She's went missing before, but never more than a few hours.  I cooked her chicken last night before I realized she was gone.  She never got to eat it.  I just assumed that she'd come back home and I'd hear her scratching on the door, or I'd find her waiting in the front yard this morning. 

We found her this morning dead in my yard.  She looked like she was sleeping.  I don't know why she died, but damn, I'm REALLY gonna miss her.   She went everywhere with me.
R.I.P. Midnight, we love you.

I did it.  Today I weighed myself and I weighed 199.  It felt good.  I eat what I want, when I want, but I just don't want what I used to, and definately not the same amounts as I used to.  I don't feel deprived AT ALL!  Not even a little bit.  This was one of the best decisions I made for myself. 

I'm down 85 pounds, with about 50 or so to go, and I'm only a little over 3 months out.   How cool is that?

It feels like Christmas!  I've finally been cleared to swim!  I know I probably won't be up to my mile a day routine at first, but I'll get there.  I LOVE it.  I'm keeping food down well after that second stricture fix, and I'm eating and losing weight.  Wonder what will happen when I start swimming again?!  (I'm going Monday morning, as soon as the girls are in school,  shhh, don't tell them)
Life is good.  My former size 24 bottoms and 3X tops have all gone bye-bye on ebay, and the size 18's I bought on ebay are about to make a re-appearance.  I could barely get in them three weeks ago, then they fit good last week, this week they are getting lose.  This was by far one of the best decisions I've ever made for myself.  My knees no longer hurt, I can bend over without almost passing out, walk for blocks and run up steps and never huff and puff.  Can't wait to get the rest off, I'm more than half way there!  I'm 10 pounds from onederland, a goal I set for Halloween, but I'm sure I'm going to arrive early for once!

So I have another stricture, doesn't seem as bad as the first but bad enough to need fixing.  Since I've been through it before, it's really no big deal.  Dr. Meilhan is on vacation, so the G.I. doctor, Dr. Krevski is fixing it, and he is SO nice and has such a great bedside manner (imply what you like about doctor Meilhan here, who by the way is a brilliant man, but I think the only class he flunked in med school was bedside manner 101)  

anyway, I'm rambling.  I've now lost exactly half of my excess weight.  I"m 68 pounds down, 67 pounds til goal.  Feels pretty good. 

swimming.  I took my girls swimming tonight.  But, Dr. M says no laps, not even half a mile.  He said have fun splashing around with the kids. 

Before surgery, I swam a mile about 4 times a week.  I love to swim alone.  It's meditative.  It clears my head.  Swimming with my kids is fun, don't get me wrong, but diving off the board and doing 72 lengths at the Y, well, there is just nothing like it in the world. 

I'm sure someday soon I'll be cleared to do it again.  He did tell me I can ride a bike, so on the first day of school, I'm going to get a new bike and ride every morning right after I get the kids to school.  (shh,. don't tell them. they'll want to quit school and join me!)

I haven't ridden a bike in a few years, I'm really looking forward to it. 
Now that I'm down quite a few pounds, I no longer feel like I may bend or break a bike!  haha.  When I was a young teenager until my late twenties, I biked everywhere, until my eldest daughter got too big for the baby seat.  I loved it.  Well, who'd have thought I'd be on this site pining away for excersize instead of food?  I don't miss any foods.  I don't even miss diet coke.  Except for the stricture, which was so easily fixed, this whole thing has been a breeze. 

What really felt great was putting my old 22's and 24's up for sale on ebay.  And another good but weird feeling is looking at clothes in the store and thinking "that size 3x, or 2x, is too BIG for me,"  not used to any clothes ever being too big, just too small. 

My friend Dawn and her daughters and me and my daughters are all going to the park for a picnic tomorrow, and we're bringing all four of my dogs, should be fun!

So tonight I'm shopping at my favorite Kmart on Castor Ave here in Philly.  They have the BEST clearance sales.  I was shopping for some cheap clothes because my size 22 pants are literally falling off of me, as well as my 2x and 3x stretch waist pants. (damn I hate the unstylishness of fat girl clothes). 

Anyway, I'm there in Kmart remembering a post I wrote earlier pre-surgery about a yellow button down shirt I wanted from there back in like March that was a size 3x and on sale for 3 bucks and I was devestated that I couldn't fit into it.  The reason I'm remembering that particular post is because now I'm shopping in the REGULAR sizes.  I'm in XL shirts.  I got to shop where the normal size people shop!  It felt strange.  Man, they've got cuter clothes than the plus size.  I get some jeans for 4 bucks, and a bunch of shirts for $1.80 on clearance. 

I was AMAZED when I saw this cute shirt that was a 1x and I tried it on and not only was it too big, but it was too long.  I'm the girl who would CONSTANTLY complain about plus size shirts being too short to cover my  baby stretched flabby lower gut, but you know what?  I don't think I ever need to wear a tunic again.  It may be the last place shrinking, but it's shrinking slow and steady. 

So one of my girls asked me what size shirt I was.  I told her "In my head I'm still a 3x, but in reality I'm an XL"  Can't wait til the shock wears off and my brain catches up to reality. 

That was a breeze.  Got my stricture fixed.  Hope it stays that way.  I'll know sooner or later, I guess.  Now I am on liquids for a few days.  Hardly felt like they did anything to me.  No pain at all.

Just talked to Laurie, my doctors surgical assistant.  She's convinced I have a stricture and they are squeezing me into their OR schedule on Monday to have it repaired.  I'm so hungry and tired, but I know as soon as I try to eat anything, no matter how mushy, I'm going to throw up.  Sigh.....

Hit a few rough spots.  Wound up in the ER one night with SERIOUS chest pain and vomiting.  Could be my gallbladder or GERD )doctors couldn't agree, but I knew I had sludge and stones and the doc was going to try and take out my gallbladder when I had my RNY but for whatever reason, he couldn't.  He's going to take it out in a few months and I'll be holding my breath hoping it doesn't happen again, and taking my Actigal faithfully.

 Anyway, while I'm in the ER, my car gets broken into and all of my daughters gluten free groceries (she's autistic with celiac disease) from Whole Foods gets stolen, as well as her teddy bears. 

I usually LOVE living in the city, but that night, I did not.  Thank goodness I put the club on, or I may not have a car.

Anyway, after a stall that lasted about a week and a half, one I was convinced would NEVER end, it not only ended, but I've dropped another 10 pounds or so since.   For some reason, I'm down over two sizes in bras and shirts, but not so much in pants.  The legs are loose, the butt is loose, but the waist still fits.  Kinda sucks, but I guess I have to be patient.  Never thought I'd lose boobies before loosing around the waist, but hey, you get what you get I guess.

I have had trouble the past few days with food getting stuck, and getting the foamies and throwing up, but it's either par for the course of a stricture.  I see the doctor in a week. 

So I've been stalled for about a week now.  It sucks.  That little voice inthe back of my head is saying "see, this isn't going to work either, you're not going to lose another pound."  But then my common sense chimes in and tells that little voice of doubt "shut up, you don't know what your talking about, she's been re-engineered to lose weight, it'll happen."  so these thoughts roll around my head 24/7.......but I guess I just have to learn to be patient.