LaurenMarieC
I have been struggled with weight issues all my life. As I am sure most of us have here. I am now at my heaviest weight ever and I am feeling it all through my body. Last year I lost 40 pounds I have gained 60 since! I feel it this weight taking me down slowly. I cannot walk like I used to I am always out of breath. My knee hurts, my hips hurt, I cannot do too much with out becoming winded. I do not want to die at a young age because of my weight. It scares me to think this. But I can feel the extra weight now more than ever before. I have tried every diet out there. I need help. I known that I was over weight, although I never really saw it looking in the mirror. I would see it in photos of me and those where the ones I tossed out. I only kept the ones that flattered me. I have been told many times that because of my personality and the way I carry myself and the way I dress that my weight in not noticed or a factor in anything. It has never hindered me from doing what I wanted to do. I am so sick of hearing what a beautiful face I have. I am sick and tired of being tired all the time and having no energy. I went shopping this weekend and had to sit down a few times to catch my breath and give my legs a rest. I looked at myself this morning and saw the fat hanging here it made me cry. I have lost my desire for most things (except eating) All I want to do is sleep. I feel disgusting. I want more than anything to loose this weight and live a longer life. At the rate I am going I am killing myself and I am scared. I was thinking that for most of my life it has been committed to eating so the rest of my life I am going to commit to be healthy! I called my doctor and saw her to get a prescription for Chantix to quit smoking. I set the date of July 1st to quit smoking. It is like reality slapped me in the face and said keep it up Lauren and you are not going to last. I want to live. I want commit to a healthy lifestyle, a fresh start to take care of my body and heart.
I am blessed to have the parents that I have and a wonderfully brother and his angelic wife. Last but never least the love of my life. My Amazing husband that has never said anything to me about my weight. That fell in love with me for me. He is heaven sent. I want to live longer to continue to share this extremely perfect love that we share! I want this to become reality. I want to stop pretending to me happy when I am not and that time is here for Lauren to take care of Lauren and give others a rest. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
