LauraKey
Week 44....New Life
Mar 13, 2010
(March 13, 2010) It's been a couple of weeks since my last post but I have been one very busy woman!
Since my last post I turned 40 on Feb. 23rd! I danced the night away with about 10 of my good girlfriends. We took a free Salsa class and then danced, danced, danced. It felt so good. I wore a gold, mini-dress and some high heels and carried a wand! Oh yes....I acted like the Goddess that I am and I was very proud of myself. I felt it was like my first birthday all over again. There was no shame in the way I felt. I looked good and I knew it. Vain....yes but hey, you only turn 40 once. I celebrated the whole week and enjoyed life to the fullest.
I have also has some difficult experiences with Lilith (my band) in the last few weeks. I experienced first-hand how anger and stress can make your band tighen with a vengence. I don't get angry much but I was upset with a lender who was not giving my client the attention she needed. This lender started to yell at me and I was NOT going to take that so I made sure I put them back in their place. Well, by the end of that episode, I was shaking, my head was pounding and Lilith (my band) was in an uproar! For the next few days I tried to stay calm but I could not get water down and I had acid reflux to levels I have never EVER had before! So off to the doctor I went. I had a full 1cc taken out. That took me to 4.0cc's. Well, I still was throwing up and experiencing bad reflux so just a few days ago I went back in and let them take out another .5cc's. SO that put me at 3.5cc's right now. I can't say it was bad either. Finally that fire in my belly calmed down and Lilith loosened her grip. But during that time I lost an additional 10lbs. I was already at goal but now I am in the 155 weight range. I don't think it looks bad on me, hubby says I still look great so maybe I will stay between 155-165 and feel ok. I am not really going for the emaciated look so I am trying to be careful! I don't know.....but I do know I don't really want to lose it like that again! Can you say.....ANGER MANAGEMENT???
My size 12 jeans are too loose now, I was getting away with wearing them without looking too baggy but not now. Hi-Ho Hi-Ho it's off to shop I go.....(giggle)
Since I have reached goal, I have been trying to focus on the positive changes in my life. Things you take for granted but notice when you now blend into the "normal" world.
Things like....
There are a few other things I am watching close. My periods are all out of whack. I had two, just two weeks apart! Gotta see if I can get more vitamins in.
I am also just no longer intrested in food. Yes, I know that's weird. Sometimes I think I have cravings but when I get a bite it just does not taste the same or feel the same. Do you know what I am talking about? Sometimes eating was just totally emotional, it tasted good because it was a release. At this point of my progress I can really and truly say....I can take food or leave it.
Well friends.....I am off to Italy! I will be gone until April 1st. A full 17 days to relax, unwind, enjoy my husband and see the world. It's my first time overseas! And....I will fit into the airplane seats! (HA)
Thanks for all the wonderful comments on my photos! I truly felt beautiful for the first time in my life and now I have those photos to help me remember that feeling!
I will tell you all about my wonderful adventures when I return! Love you all BUNCHES!
And as always.....I AM BLESSED!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475
0 comments
Since my last post I turned 40 on Feb. 23rd! I danced the night away with about 10 of my good girlfriends. We took a free Salsa class and then danced, danced, danced. It felt so good. I wore a gold, mini-dress and some high heels and carried a wand! Oh yes....I acted like the Goddess that I am and I was very proud of myself. I felt it was like my first birthday all over again. There was no shame in the way I felt. I looked good and I knew it. Vain....yes but hey, you only turn 40 once. I celebrated the whole week and enjoyed life to the fullest.
I have also has some difficult experiences with Lilith (my band) in the last few weeks. I experienced first-hand how anger and stress can make your band tighen with a vengence. I don't get angry much but I was upset with a lender who was not giving my client the attention she needed. This lender started to yell at me and I was NOT going to take that so I made sure I put them back in their place. Well, by the end of that episode, I was shaking, my head was pounding and Lilith (my band) was in an uproar! For the next few days I tried to stay calm but I could not get water down and I had acid reflux to levels I have never EVER had before! So off to the doctor I went. I had a full 1cc taken out. That took me to 4.0cc's. Well, I still was throwing up and experiencing bad reflux so just a few days ago I went back in and let them take out another .5cc's. SO that put me at 3.5cc's right now. I can't say it was bad either. Finally that fire in my belly calmed down and Lilith loosened her grip. But during that time I lost an additional 10lbs. I was already at goal but now I am in the 155 weight range. I don't think it looks bad on me, hubby says I still look great so maybe I will stay between 155-165 and feel ok. I am not really going for the emaciated look so I am trying to be careful! I don't know.....but I do know I don't really want to lose it like that again! Can you say.....ANGER MANAGEMENT???
My size 12 jeans are too loose now, I was getting away with wearing them without looking too baggy but not now. Hi-Ho Hi-Ho it's off to shop I go.....(giggle)
Since I have reached goal, I have been trying to focus on the positive changes in my life. Things you take for granted but notice when you now blend into the "normal" world.
Things like....
- Using a regular sized towel to wrap around you while you are getting ready in the morning.
- People looking you in the eye when they talk to you.
- Men whistling at you.
- The way you feel in your clothes.
- Getting a good nights rest because your body does not always have body parts falling asleep to deadness.
- Liking the image that looks back at you in the mirror.
- Shopping in the regular sized stores.
- Feeling sexy for no reason
- Knowing you can fit into a airplane seat (I have a trip coming up, more later)
- Accepting compliments without shame.
- Feeling good in room full of women! Women can be so catty sometimes, but I can hold my own now! I no longer hide in the shadows!
There are a few other things I am watching close. My periods are all out of whack. I had two, just two weeks apart! Gotta see if I can get more vitamins in.
I am also just no longer intrested in food. Yes, I know that's weird. Sometimes I think I have cravings but when I get a bite it just does not taste the same or feel the same. Do you know what I am talking about? Sometimes eating was just totally emotional, it tasted good because it was a release. At this point of my progress I can really and truly say....I can take food or leave it.
Well friends.....I am off to Italy! I will be gone until April 1st. A full 17 days to relax, unwind, enjoy my husband and see the world. It's my first time overseas! And....I will fit into the airplane seats! (HA)
Thanks for all the wonderful comments on my photos! I truly felt beautiful for the first time in my life and now I have those photos to help me remember that feeling!
I will tell you all about my wonderful adventures when I return! Love you all BUNCHES!
And as always.....I AM BLESSED!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475
Week 40...New Attitude & New Pics!!!
Feb 20, 2010
What a wonderful ride this week has been! On Tuesday we had a great performance and I got a few new pics of me singing!
Then I had a whole new photo shoot! I have never felt so beautiful in all my damn life. For once I felt like the person I always wanted to emerge. She is here....oh yes she is!
I had a wonderful photographer and she made me so comfortable in front of the camera.
What a wonderful new life this is.
I turn 40 this week! I feel better than I did when I was 20!
I am going to have a party on Friday with all my girlfriends. We are going to take a Salsa class and then dance the night away and I am going to make a poster of all my new photos so share with everyone!
Happy Birthday To Me!
Come share in my joy!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums5264.html
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
0 comments
Then I had a whole new photo shoot! I have never felt so beautiful in all my damn life. For once I felt like the person I always wanted to emerge. She is here....oh yes she is!
I had a wonderful photographer and she made me so comfortable in front of the camera.
What a wonderful new life this is.
I turn 40 this week! I feel better than I did when I was 20!
I am going to have a party on Friday with all my girlfriends. We are going to take a Salsa class and then dance the night away and I am going to make a poster of all my new photos so share with everyone!
Happy Birthday To Me!
Come share in my joy!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums5264.html
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
My First Performance Where I Am Happy with my Looks
Feb 12, 2010
I had to share this with you all. After all you all have been a huge part of my journey.
My husband and I performed at the Orion Music Festival in Utah in January 2010. We were featured on the TV show in Park City.
For the first time in my life, I was happy with the way I looked. Look! I have a waist! You have to remember just the year before I refused to take photos with the band because of my weight!
I hope you enjoy! Ain't no stopping me now! It's a YouTube video.
YouTube - "Want Me Tomorrow" on PCTV
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
0 comments
My husband and I performed at the Orion Music Festival in Utah in January 2010. We were featured on the TV show in Park City.
For the first time in my life, I was happy with the way I looked. Look! I have a waist!
You have to remember just the year before I refused to take photos with the band because of my weight!I hope you enjoy! Ain't no stopping me now! It's a YouTube video.
YouTube - "Want Me Tomorrow" on PCTV
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Week 39...reFocusing after Goal
Feb 10, 2010
(Feb 10, 2010) When you are in the middle of your journey and trying to hit your weight loss goal, it is on your mind all the time. That's what you focus on.
Once you hit that goal you have to readjust and refocus on just maintaining. There is where I am.
There are spots I need to work on to tone a bit more and now how so I eat to maintain? Do I exercise a little less each week?
These are the things I have been trying to wrap my little brain around.
I just came from the doctor's office to have a teeny little bit of fluid removed. I have not been very comfortable the last week. I fell back on just eating soup because I threw up a couple times since last week's unfill. This now puts me at 5.0cc's in my band.
What I was finding was this....I'd go to bed and have acid reflux a lot. I'd eat solids and then the next day my tummy would hurt. So I just did not feel comfy.
I was so scared to go in for this unfill today. What if they take too much and I get hungry again? What if I eat more than a cup of food? Will my cravings return?
Lord....what a journey!
Since I have not been able to eat much in the last few weeks I was too exhausted to exercise daily so I did what I could, but now I am feeling better and have started back on the treadmill 60 minutes each day. I want to return back to my Tony Horton 10 Minute Trainer next week.
I do not want the rest of my life to be focus on food and the scale! Anybody else scared of this?
So tonight I am going to try a Smart One Frozen meal. Is that too much food?
OK...I am freaking out a bit but it's only because I am so happy with where I am and I'd like to stay here!
On a good note, I have a photo shoot scheduled for late next week and I am super stoked about how these photos will turn out. Keep your eye out for the new me!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
0 comments
Once you hit that goal you have to readjust and refocus on just maintaining. There is where I am.
There are spots I need to work on to tone a bit more and now how so I eat to maintain? Do I exercise a little less each week?
These are the things I have been trying to wrap my little brain around.
I just came from the doctor's office to have a teeny little bit of fluid removed. I have not been very comfortable the last week. I fell back on just eating soup because I threw up a couple times since last week's unfill. This now puts me at 5.0cc's in my band.
What I was finding was this....I'd go to bed and have acid reflux a lot. I'd eat solids and then the next day my tummy would hurt. So I just did not feel comfy.
I was so scared to go in for this unfill today. What if they take too much and I get hungry again? What if I eat more than a cup of food? Will my cravings return?
Lord....what a journey!
Since I have not been able to eat much in the last few weeks I was too exhausted to exercise daily so I did what I could, but now I am feeling better and have started back on the treadmill 60 minutes each day. I want to return back to my Tony Horton 10 Minute Trainer next week.
I do not want the rest of my life to be focus on food and the scale! Anybody else scared of this?
So tonight I am going to try a Smart One Frozen meal. Is that too much food?
OK...I am freaking out a bit but it's only because I am so happy with where I am and I'd like to stay here!
On a good note, I have a photo shoot scheduled for late next week and I am super stoked about how these photos will turn out. Keep your eye out for the new me!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Week 38...Goal...115lbs Lost
Feb 04, 2010
Well....my day is here! As of this morning...I have hit my goal weight of 165lbs!
I knew this day would come but until you actually see it, you just don't believe it!
Funny, I thought I'd be jumping up and down and screaming over it, but I am pretty calm about it and happy as a lark.
I had to go for a tad bit of unfill yesterday. I am down to 5.2cc's. My body is adjusting a bit and I may have to go in again for another tweak by getting more taken out so I can maintain.
It's amazing to me that I don't need as much fill as others. I mean I just assumed we all were pretty much on the same with that but not needing much more than 5cc's is amazing to me.
Anything too much over 5.4cc and I get stuck and throw up in my sleep. Which is NOT a pleasant feeling at all.
It's scary because I think, what if I don't wake up and I choke?!
So now, the major question is....do I need to lose more or should I be happy with what I am now? My initial goal was 170 but then I thought 165 would be better for BMI purposes. Now I am not really sure if I want to stop. What about 160? Plan for the monthly weight gain, blah, blah, blah. Am I turning into one of those skinny bitties who obsesses over the scale!
There are some places I feel need to get a little thinner but I am not sure if it's because they are not quite as toned as I want them to be or if it's really just a tad bit flabby.
Everyone knows from previous posts I am not exactly happy with where my tummy is but I want to give it a full year before considering anything else.
I tried on a size 10 and danced all around the dressing room when they fit. I am thrilled with that....so what is it in me right now that wants more? I am going to have to meditate on that. I mean, I don't want to look sickly! Shape and curves are good. RIGHT???? I am feeling really silly right now...why am I not as happy as I thought I would be?
On a different note...my doc left the office where he was. He is on an extended vacation right now and when he comes back he will decide where he will be. Not sure how I feel about that. I love him but I love my nurses too. I bet my main nurse will go with him and if that happens I will move my files with him. Didn't see that coming!
As always....I AM BLESSED!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
0 comments
I knew this day would come but until you actually see it, you just don't believe it!
Funny, I thought I'd be jumping up and down and screaming over it, but I am pretty calm about it and happy as a lark.
I had to go for a tad bit of unfill yesterday. I am down to 5.2cc's. My body is adjusting a bit and I may have to go in again for another tweak by getting more taken out so I can maintain.
It's amazing to me that I don't need as much fill as others. I mean I just assumed we all were pretty much on the same with that but not needing much more than 5cc's is amazing to me.
Anything too much over 5.4cc and I get stuck and throw up in my sleep. Which is NOT a pleasant feeling at all.
It's scary because I think, what if I don't wake up and I choke?!So now, the major question is....do I need to lose more or should I be happy with what I am now? My initial goal was 170 but then I thought 165 would be better for BMI purposes. Now I am not really sure if I want to stop. What about 160? Plan for the monthly weight gain, blah, blah, blah. Am I turning into one of those skinny bitties who obsesses over the scale!
There are some places I feel need to get a little thinner but I am not sure if it's because they are not quite as toned as I want them to be or if it's really just a tad bit flabby.
Everyone knows from previous posts I am not exactly happy with where my tummy is but I want to give it a full year before considering anything else.
I tried on a size 10 and danced all around the dressing room when they fit. I am thrilled with that....so what is it in me right now that wants more? I am going to have to meditate on that. I mean, I don't want to look sickly! Shape and curves are good.
RIGHT???? I am feeling really silly right now...why am I not as happy as I thought I would be?On a different note...my doc left the office where he was. He is on an extended vacation right now and when he comes back he will decide where he will be. Not sure how I feel about that. I love him but I love my nurses too. I bet my main nurse will go with him and if that happens I will move my files with him. Didn't see that coming!
As always....I AM BLESSED!
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO
Follow my progress thru photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Week 37...Scale Moving; 110lbs Gone
Jan 31, 2010
Well, this past week was very uneventful. I did lose the water weight and two more pounds. So I have lost 110lbs now and only five more to goal!
I am a bit concerned about my band. Seems like I can't keep much down but I don't get sick off of everything.
I think I am just readjusting again. I use to be able to eat salmon earlier on in my process but now, it just sits there like a ball of coal. I'd like to eat more fish since it's good for me. Tomorrow I am going to try and make a Tuna Casserole.
I'm not so sure it's the food, maybe my eyes are bigger than my tummy again. I hate to waste! I am not a big person for left-overs. Thank goodness I got a hubby who usually eats everything I don't. I don't know why I hate re-heated food. I am ok with things like Veggie Soup and Chili, all the stuff seems to taste better the next day anyway but anything else....no thanks.
Also, I am having trouble getting my all my water in each day. I am on where NEAR the intake I should be taking in.
Are there any good cookbooks for one or two people out there?
I got an email from my doctors office this past week. They have been going through files and picking out the most successful people and they are starting a photo board. They would like me to submit some photos! I was honored!
I turn 40 Feb. 23rd and so I planned a photo shoot on Feb. 19th! I am so excited about it too. I have been looking at new clothes and hairstyles and everything. It will be so much fun! I can't wait. I'll share of course.
Ok, so I have something funny. I have NO BUTT! I need some padding back there. We went out to eat and those darned seats were killing me. I was squirming in that chair. The things you did not know before you sure know after! HEE HEE!
Ok, I know you guys heard me say this before but I am not very happy about how my tummy is shaping up. It feels so weird. I am not sure it will firm up right. I am going to give it a good whole year of working and toning it as much as possible, but I don't think I will be able to really rule out a tummy tuck. I just really don't want more surgery. I've never been a surgery person and I've only had two in my life with the LAP-BAND® being one. I'd love to hear from others who have something to say on this. If you've had surgery I want to hear from you and if you've not had surgery what did you do to firm it up.
So....just five more pounds people. I can do this!
Always....I am blessed!
Follow my progress:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Surgery Date: May 21, 2010
Dr. M. Metz - St. Lukes - Denver, CO
0 comments
I am a bit concerned about my band. Seems like I can't keep much down but I don't get sick off of everything.
I think I am just readjusting again. I use to be able to eat salmon earlier on in my process but now, it just sits there like a ball of coal. I'd like to eat more fish since it's good for me. Tomorrow I am going to try and make a Tuna Casserole.
I'm not so sure it's the food, maybe my eyes are bigger than my tummy again. I hate to waste! I am not a big person for left-overs. Thank goodness I got a hubby who usually eats everything I don't. I don't know why I hate re-heated food. I am ok with things like Veggie Soup and Chili, all the stuff seems to taste better the next day anyway but anything else....no thanks.
Also, I am having trouble getting my all my water in each day. I am on where NEAR the intake I should be taking in.
Are there any good cookbooks for one or two people out there?
I got an email from my doctors office this past week. They have been going through files and picking out the most successful people and they are starting a photo board. They would like me to submit some photos! I was honored!
I turn 40 Feb. 23rd and so I planned a photo shoot on Feb. 19th! I am so excited about it too. I have been looking at new clothes and hairstyles and everything. It will be so much fun! I can't wait. I'll share of course.
Ok, so I have something funny. I have NO BUTT! I need some padding back there. We went out to eat and those darned seats were killing me. I was squirming in that chair. The things you did not know before you sure know after! HEE HEE!
Ok, I know you guys heard me say this before but I am not very happy about how my tummy is shaping up. It feels so weird. I am not sure it will firm up right. I am going to give it a good whole year of working and toning it as much as possible, but I don't think I will be able to really rule out a tummy tuck. I just really don't want more surgery. I've never been a surgery person and I've only had two in my life with the LAP-BAND® being one. I'd love to hear from others who have something to say on this. If you've had surgery I want to hear from you and if you've not had surgery what did you do to firm it up.
So....just five more pounds people. I can do this!
Always....I am blessed!
Follow my progress:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Starting Weight: 280lbs
Surgery Date: May 21, 2010
Dr. M. Metz - St. Lukes - Denver, CO
Week 36...Stall & Body Image
Jan 28, 2010
(Jan 23, 10) It never fails....only women have to deal with the ups and downs or crazy hormones! I never lose during this week and matter of fact that last few cycles I have gained five to seven pounds of water weight. It's so frustrating. I know, it doesn't stay but to be so darned close and see the scale not move or go the other way makes me want to scream. Now I understand the commercials for Midol! Who knew? When I was 280 I did not feel it at all.
This week I managed to bang my knee in a weird spot which would not allow me to exercise at all. I tried the treadmill and my knee completely gave out!
Oh, no....can't have that so I had to let it heal. Oh the horror! 
But somehow I am still calm about it all. I just know I can drop the last few pounds before my 40th birthday (Feb 23)
I have been trying to reflect on my journey as much as possible and there are some things I have got to get better at. I still think I eat too fast sometimes, and also sometimes too late in the day. I tend to sleep better if I don't eat after 7pm, but sometimes that's so hard with my profession. (Realtor) And I KNOW for a fact I don't get all my water in. Got to do better with that. I also need to expand my menu's a bit. It's so easy to just fall back on easy things like soups. So I am going to really try and focus on those things. I wish I could make myself go to bed earlier but I am such a natural night owl!
In the next few weeks I will be having new professional photos done for my business cards and for my singing ad's. It's so fun to think about all the cool clothes I can get for these photos. There were two ladies in the office talking about a huge sale at "express" and for the first time I allowed myself to think I just might go check that sale out! I may be able to fit some of that stuff! (wheee)
I still have this image of me that is larger and shopping is fun but I tend to still pick up the larger sizes. It's so funny....when the sales people bring me the smaller size. My mind and my mouth immediately say....oh no...that's too small! However when I try it on it magically fits! Euphoria! I went into Lane Bryant last week out of habit and the sales lady who knows me said...Oh no honey, you can't wear stuff here anymore! HA!
I use to think I would be a size 12 but I am starting to see that I may be able to wear some size 10's. ME....A size 10!
I guess not really much to report this week but not all weeks can be full of stimulating activity! The fact of it all is, I am still adjusting and everyday is a new adventure no matter how major or how small! I am riding high!
And as always....I am Blessed!
See my progress photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Start Weight: 280lbs
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Dr. M. Metz
St. Lukes Hospital-Denver, CO
0 comments
Who knew? When I was 280 I did not feel it at all.This week I managed to bang my knee in a weird spot which would not allow me to exercise at all. I tried the treadmill and my knee completely gave out!
Oh, no....can't have that so I had to let it heal. Oh the horror! But somehow I am still calm about it all. I just know I can drop the last few pounds before my 40th birthday (Feb 23)I have been trying to reflect on my journey as much as possible and there are some things I have got to get better at. I still think I eat too fast sometimes, and also sometimes too late in the day. I tend to sleep better if I don't eat after 7pm, but sometimes that's so hard with my profession. (Realtor) And I KNOW for a fact I don't get all my water in. Got to do better with that. I also need to expand my menu's a bit. It's so easy to just fall back on easy things like soups. So I am going to really try and focus on those things. I wish I could make myself go to bed earlier but I am such a natural night owl!
In the next few weeks I will be having new professional photos done for my business cards and for my singing ad's. It's so fun to think about all the cool clothes I can get for these photos. There were two ladies in the office talking about a huge sale at "express" and for the first time I allowed myself to think I just might go check that sale out! I may be able to fit some of that stuff! (wheee)
I still have this image of me that is larger and shopping is fun but I tend to still pick up the larger sizes. It's so funny....when the sales people bring me the smaller size. My mind and my mouth immediately say....oh no...that's too small! However when I try it on it magically fits! Euphoria!
I went into Lane Bryant last week out of habit and the sales lady who knows me said...Oh no honey, you can't wear stuff here anymore! HA!I use to think I would be a size 12 but I am starting to see that I may be able to wear some size 10's. ME....A size 10!
I guess not really much to report this week but not all weeks can be full of stimulating activity!
The fact of it all is, I am still adjusting and everyday is a new adventure no matter how major or how small! I am riding high!And as always....I am Blessed!
See my progress photos:
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Start Weight: 280lbs
Surgery Date: May 21, 2009
Dr. M. Metz
St. Lukes Hospital-Denver, CO
Week 35...New Concerns...106lbs Down
Jan 17, 2010
(Jan 17, 2010) I just can't believe how fantastic I feel. Today I stepped on the scale and had dropped more pounds. Total to date 106lbs. I have decided 165lbs will be my goal. So I have just 11lbs to go.
My husband and I played the Orion Music Festival this past weekend in Park City, UT and Salt Lake City, UT. It was awesome!
We were asked to perform on the Park City TV show. I was so amazed and dumbfounded when I saw myself on TV. Was that really me? You hear the TV adds 10lbs, but that is not what I saw! I was so thrilled! I was JAMMING TOO! There was space between my thighs, space between my arms and waist! I was so thrilled I almost cried, but I had to be professional and keep on singing! (HA)
I found out I have another "NO" food. Peanuts! We drove to Salt Lake because we had lots of equipment for our gigs and on the way I had just a few peanuts. OH NO! Lilith (my band) did not like them, she churned them and churned them, then said....BLAH, get rid of these! Thank goodness she was merciful and waiting until after I performed on TV to get rid of the peanuts!
I am up to two "no" foods. Rice and Peanuts. Ok, I can handle that! I had to just drink broth for the next day and a half to get Lilith back on track.
So I must say, with me getting close to goal it brings up a whole new set of issues that may be of concern for me.
So that is my story for this week and I am sticking with it. I promised to share the good, bad and ugly!
Oh yes....I am blessed!
Original Weight: 280lbs
Date of Surgery: May 21, 2009
Dr. M. Metz at St. Lukes in Denver, CO
0 comments
My husband and I played the Orion Music Festival this past weekend in Park City, UT and Salt Lake City, UT. It was awesome!
We were asked to perform on the Park City TV show. I was so amazed and dumbfounded when I saw myself on TV. Was that really me? You hear the TV adds 10lbs, but that is not what I saw! I was so thrilled! I was JAMMING TOO!
There was space between my thighs, space between my arms and waist! I was so thrilled I almost cried, but I had to be professional and keep on singing! (HA)I found out I have another "NO" food. Peanuts! We drove to Salt Lake because we had lots of equipment for our gigs and on the way I had just a few peanuts. OH NO! Lilith (my band) did not like them, she churned them and churned them, then said....BLAH, get rid of these! Thank goodness she was merciful and waiting until after I performed on TV to get rid of the peanuts!
I am up to two "no" foods. Rice and Peanuts. Ok, I can handle that! I had to just drink broth for the next day and a half to get Lilith back on track.
So I must say, with me getting close to goal it brings up a whole new set of issues that may be of concern for me.
- Once I hit goal, will I be able to maintain?
- Will I be able to tighten up the few little areas that look like they may sag?
- And if not, do I really want to go for more surgery?
- And if so, how on earth do I pay for that? (I was self pay on my surgery)
- I was told to wait 6 months to a year to see how my body firms up to decide this.
- Will my goal weight be enough?
- Will I become this vain shallow person?
- What I mean by this is....I have never been thin so I feel sexy right now. I feel wonderful and beautiful, but I don't want to be the girl that is always in the mirror primping! (you guys would understand this because if you have never been thin or the girl who was considered cute you just would not understand!)
- What I mean by this is....I have never been thin so I feel sexy right now. I feel wonderful and beautiful, but I don't want to be the girl that is always in the mirror primping!
So that is my story for this week and I am sticking with it. I promised to share the good, bad and ugly!
Oh yes....I am blessed!
Original Weight: 280lbs
Date of Surgery: May 21, 2009
Dr. M. Metz at St. Lukes in Denver, CO
Week 33 1/2....Century Club
Jan 17, 2010
I did it! I did it! I did it!
I have lost a total of 100lbs as of January 11, 2010!
Just 15lbs to goal!
You are looking at one happy lady!
Check out my progress photos!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
0 comments
I have lost a total of 100lbs as of January 11, 2010!
Just 15lbs to goal!
You are looking at one happy lady!
Check out my progress photos!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475.html
Week 33....Reflections
Jan 17, 2010
Who knew I would ever feel so wonderful? Being healthy and thin was always such a dream to me and now I am living the dream. Although I have a few more pounds to go I feel beautiful and alive!
I got my fill back this week but we did not put the full 1cc back in. I am at 5.4cc and I think I'd like to see how that feels for a couple of weeks before going back to 5.6cc. I am getting close to goal and I seemed to get stuck on simple things at 5.6cc. Maybe I was taking too big of bites, or not chewing but while I was unfilled I kinda reset myself. I did the clear liquid diet for three days, then soft foods.
Today I am back at soft foods because I just had my fill just a few days.
My new workout program seems to be working. I wish you could have seen me on day one when I ended my workout in tears. I still can't do a full push-up but I am on day 12 and can do a half of one! (giggle) Hey, it's progress! I'm still in the 180's, up two, down two. My nutritionist said with the new workout program and having an unfill that is normal. So I am hovering around 181 to 184, but now that I got my fill I see me hitting 180 soon! That will put me in the 100lbs lost club! Oh the joy of it all.
On January 6th, my son celebrated his 23rd birthday. I was going through my photos and found a photo of me from his birthday last year. I DO NOT LOOK LIKE THAT ANYMORE! I was so shocked, so happy, and even more motivated to get to my goal by my 40th birthday (Feb 23).
When I showed my son and hubby my comparison photos both of them stood in disbelief. I mean, they saw me everyday, they knew and loved me at 280 but they really had no clue just how much danger I was in with all the weight. Hubby said...I remember taking those photos are our son's party and thinking...her weight is up a little bit, but it was not until recently that I realized just how much pain you were in. (to see the comparison photo, follow the link at the bottom of this blog)
You see....I would come home from 14-16 hour work days and crash out hard. I am a realtor so showing houses was one of the hardest things for me....AND don't let there be stairs....LORD HELP! We'd pig out on football games....pizza, wings, popcorn, candy....it was all an excuse for me. I now see it as clear as a blue sky.
I would not take band photos with my husband because I was 280! I looked horrible....who wants to see a band with a lead female vocalist who does not fit the mold? I was afraid if I took those photos, clubs would not book my husband because of me. So I let another singer shine in those photos and I secretly died a little inside.
I can't tell you just how much this surgery has changed my whole life.
People look at me now. You know what I mean? When you are fat you are invisible to people or they judge you immediately based on what you look like! You know the story! Some people know they do it and others do it without really knowing they are hurting you.
Comments like...."hey you sure have a pretty face" sound like compliments, but in the back of your mind you know what else they are thinking....
I have always been a friendly person. I'd speak to people I did not know when in passing. Lots of times they would find a reason to look a way. That has changed! People speak to me first and it's a shock to me.
Last week I had to walk to an appointment. I work downtown so I pass lots of buildings where you can see your reflection. I'd never look over because I'd hate to see myself. Well, I got a glimpce of myself and stopped in my tracks....could that person starring back at me really be me? I was shocked by my own reflection!
I love photos now and I am pushing hubby to take new band photos (giggle) Yes, a little selfish I know but he understands.
But what really made me happy....at my son's birthday bash, I really had a ball! I danced with him, I met all his friends with a huge "REAL" smile on my face and I felt BEAUTIFUL!
For the first time in my life.....I REALLY FEEL BEAUTIFUL!
Oh, what a journey this has been and even though you always see me close out my blogs with....I am blessed......I feel it to my core.
Oh yes friends.....I AM TRULY - TRULY BLESSED!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/57955-albums3475-picture29503.jpg
0 comments
I got my fill back this week but we did not put the full 1cc back in. I am at 5.4cc and I think I'd like to see how that feels for a couple of weeks before going back to 5.6cc. I am getting close to goal and I seemed to get stuck on simple things at 5.6cc. Maybe I was taking too big of bites, or not chewing but while I was unfilled I kinda reset myself. I did the clear liquid diet for three days, then soft foods.
Today I am back at soft foods because I just had my fill just a few days.
My new workout program seems to be working. I wish you could have seen me on day one when I ended my workout in tears. I still can't do a full push-up but I am on day 12 and can do a half of one! (giggle) Hey, it's progress! I'm still in the 180's, up two, down two. My nutritionist said with the new workout program and having an unfill that is normal. So I am hovering around 181 to 184, but now that I got my fill I see me hitting 180 soon! That will put me in the 100lbs lost club! Oh the joy of it all.
On January 6th, my son celebrated his 23rd birthday. I was going through my photos and found a photo of me from his birthday last year. I DO NOT LOOK LIKE THAT ANYMORE! I was so shocked, so happy, and even more motivated to get to my goal by my 40th birthday (Feb 23).
When I showed my son and hubby my comparison photos both of them stood in disbelief. I mean, they saw me everyday, they knew and loved me at 280 but they really had no clue just how much danger I was in with all the weight. Hubby said...I remember taking those photos are our son's party and thinking...her weight is up a little bit, but it was not until recently that I realized just how much pain you were in. (to see the comparison photo, follow the link at the bottom of this blog)
You see....I would come home from 14-16 hour work days and crash out hard. I am a realtor so showing houses was one of the hardest things for me....AND don't let there be stairs....LORD HELP! We'd pig out on football games....pizza, wings, popcorn, candy....it was all an excuse for me. I now see it as clear as a blue sky.
I would not take band photos with my husband because I was 280! I looked horrible....who wants to see a band with a lead female vocalist who does not fit the mold? I was afraid if I took those photos, clubs would not book my husband because of me. So I let another singer shine in those photos and I secretly died a little inside.
I can't tell you just how much this surgery has changed my whole life.
People look at me now. You know what I mean? When you are fat you are invisible to people or they judge you immediately based on what you look like! You know the story! Some people know they do it and others do it without really knowing they are hurting you.
Comments like...."hey you sure have a pretty face" sound like compliments, but in the back of your mind you know what else they are thinking....
I have always been a friendly person. I'd speak to people I did not know when in passing. Lots of times they would find a reason to look a way. That has changed! People speak to me first and it's a shock to me.
Last week I had to walk to an appointment. I work downtown so I pass lots of buildings where you can see your reflection. I'd never look over because I'd hate to see myself. Well, I got a glimpce of myself and stopped in my tracks....could that person starring back at me really be me? I was shocked by my own reflection!
I love photos now and I am pushing hubby to take new band photos (giggle) Yes, a little selfish I know but he understands.
But what really made me happy....at my son's birthday bash, I really had a ball! I danced with him, I met all his friends with a huge "REAL" smile on my face and I felt BEAUTIFUL!
For the first time in my life.....I REALLY FEEL BEAUTIFUL!
Oh, what a journey this has been and even though you always see me close out my blogs with....I am blessed......I feel it to my core.
Oh yes friends.....I AM TRULY - TRULY BLESSED!
http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/57955-albums3475-picture29503.jpg
