KathyM38
End of Week Stress!
Mar 27, 2009
Well, I'm feeling a little down today. I'm wishing I didn't have to close at work tonight. I'm wishing I could have just one day to myself to actually take care of me. I'm wishing I could just not weigh in next week because I have a feeling I haven't really lost any weight this month. I'm wishing that I didn't have so many bills to pay and that I had enough money to pay them. There, that's me getting some stuff off of my chest for the day!! The bright side is that me and my husband get to work the same hours tonight, so I'll get to see him at work and we can save gas by driving together. I do enjoy the time with my daughters and husband, but I know I also have to make time for me...maybe on my days off next week! I have been trying to be good and drink more water and eat more fruit, but I have to stop being tempted by everything around me. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to lose a few pounds in a month....I have five more months to go!! I know that I have to lose some weight or the insurance company won't approve the surgery, so I just have to buckle down and get to it!! As far as money goes, I don't think we'll ever be completely debt free...it's just a fact of life for me now. I have never been able to rest my mind and know that the bills were all paid for. It's a never ending battle, and I guess I just have to live with it. I'm hoping I can drink some extra water at work and tomorrow at the party for my niece!
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Pulmonary Exam Complete!
Mar 20, 2009
I went for my pulmonary exam that my surgeon requires everyone to have in order to get cleared for surgery. It wasn't much. I basically answered a few questions and he checked my breathing and the swelling in my ankles, and that was it. He is sending me for a sleep study just to be sure about sleep apnea and to see whether I have it or not. I suppose I could have it, because I do snore and wake up with headaches at times. I can also remember waking up coughing and not really knowing why I woke. I guess we'll see how that goes, but I'm not sure when I'm going to be able to schedule the study for. They say you don't have to take off of work for it, but I would rather be off the next day, because it is so far from my house, that it would take me about an hour or more to get to work that morning. I am going to call on Monday to see when they would be able to fit me in. I'm a little concerned and wonder if these sleep tests are accurate. I mean, you are basically sleeping somewhere strange without your family and all of your surroundings. I have a very hard time sleeping in new places...this has been a problem when we've gone on vacations in the past. I do hope that all goes well with it though. I suppose if I have to get this done to have my surgery, then I will do it. I don't want one little test getting in the way of a healthier me!!
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My Insurance Company
Mar 17, 2009
Yesterday when my hubby and I were home I asked him to give our insurance a call to see what needed to be done in order to be approved for weight loss surgery. I was still getting nervous over the whole five year weight history thing and I knew I wouldn't relax until I knew...and he knew it too! :) Well, he called and spoke to someone at Aetna and she took our phone numbers down so that someone would call us back and let us know all that we needed to know. Last night I came home and found a message on my machine from Carol at Aetna and requested I call her back. Fortunately, I was too tired from working my first closing shift that I didn't give the message a second thought. Normally, I get worried and wonder and always expect the worst. My husband called her this morning while we were sitting together and after a little intro, she asked to talk to me and she was sooo nice and wonderful! I was quite surprised...you do hear the horror stories of insurance companies and I was so afraid that mine would be that way. She went over all of my history, and let me know that I do qualify based on my BMI alone. She did mention that I only needed to have a weight loss history from 2007 and I would be good...five years was not required by them. Now, I start to wonder..."did I go in 2007?...I think I did...I hope they wrote something down about my weight!" LOL That is me and my crazy mind thinking too much again. She went over all of the points of what is required. I have already done a few of them...my doctor is in a Center of Excellence program, which they require. I have started the managed weight loss...which six months is required! I suppose I can handle that. I think that will give me time to really make a good decision on which surgery to choose. I need to have a Psych done, and I already have an appointment for that scheduled. She said I sound like a good candidate and I've done my research...and now she is going to call me back halfway through the required supervised weight loss program and see how I'm doing. I think that's great! She said she is going to be my bariatric case worker through Aetna and if I need any help in getting things approved, just call her and she will help me out with that! How great is that!?! I'm really glad that when my husband's company gave us the choice of keeping our old BCBS HMO and switch to Aetna that we made the right choice and switched. BCBS has such tough requirements for the surgery that the last time I tried this, I gave up because I thought I wouldn't be able to get approved. I'm thankful that Aetna is really working with us on this, because I really do want to see my girls grow up and have children of their own. I want to be there for them and see them grow into the beautiful women they're already becoming. And I have finally found the man of my dreams and I want to enjoy the pleasure of his company for many many years to come!! My fears regarding my insurance are now calmed and I can honestly say that part of the battle is done! Now I just have to do the tough stuff...like pick a surgery...finish the supervised weight loss with some success...and get through all of the testing! Yeah!! I'm finally feeling like I'm on my way to the healthier me!!! 
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Still Thinking About It!
Mar 15, 2009
Well, it's another Monday and I'm up early. I don't work until later this afternoon, but I still have to get the kids off to school. It's nice being home with them in the morning because normally I'm at work at this time. I will miss them tonight though, and I'll really be wishing I didn't have to work evenings! They decided to change my schedule on me...without giving me a whole lot of notice. I really wish they would talk to me and ask me first how I feel about things instead of just doing them. I gave them an updated availability schedule for my hours, and that qualifies me more for part-time than full-time. I'm okay with that right now. I need to be home more often and I need to concentrate on me. Plus, it will give me time to study this summer when I take my first online college course. I am going to work towards that nursing degree and this is going to be the year. This is the year for many changes, and by the end of 2009, I'm going to be a changed person!
Anyway, I'm still a little hesitant about making a final decision for which surgery to have at this time. I'm leaning towards the roux-en-y, but am still leaving the door open for the realize band/lap band option. I can't decide between having my stomach permanently altered, or having an implant in me for life. They both come with pros and cons that I have to seriously think about. I haven't told my whole family yet, and I'm sure my mom, who's a nurse, will have some insight on which would be best. It's not that I'm afraid to talk to my extended family, but I am just concerned that they will try to talk me out of it. That is the reason why I have started the process without telling them. I know this is the right decision for me, and I'm not going to let anyone talk me out of it. I've lost weight the old-fashioned way before and it didn't stay off. I am dedicated to getting this surgery and I know all of the risks and benefits. I'm ready this time!! My husband and my daughters are behind me and that's all that matters. They are the ones that will be here for me when I come home from the hospital and will help me every day as I work on getting healthier. I would just really like the rest of my family to be behind me as well!
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Anyway, I'm still a little hesitant about making a final decision for which surgery to have at this time. I'm leaning towards the roux-en-y, but am still leaving the door open for the realize band/lap band option. I can't decide between having my stomach permanently altered, or having an implant in me for life. They both come with pros and cons that I have to seriously think about. I haven't told my whole family yet, and I'm sure my mom, who's a nurse, will have some insight on which would be best. It's not that I'm afraid to talk to my extended family, but I am just concerned that they will try to talk me out of it. That is the reason why I have started the process without telling them. I know this is the right decision for me, and I'm not going to let anyone talk me out of it. I've lost weight the old-fashioned way before and it didn't stay off. I am dedicated to getting this surgery and I know all of the risks and benefits. I'm ready this time!! My husband and my daughters are behind me and that's all that matters. They are the ones that will be here for me when I come home from the hospital and will help me every day as I work on getting healthier. I would just really like the rest of my family to be behind me as well!
Weight Loss Clinic - 1st Visit
Mar 03, 2009
Today was my day off from work and that left me some time to go to the first weight loss clinic visit. (I'm not exactly sure if that is what they call it there, but that is what I'm calling it.) I have actually gained a couple of pounds since my consultation last week. I am retaining water from PMS, so I'm not too upset about it. It doesn't make me happy, but I'm not going to dwell on it either. The nurse gave us a full overview of what we need to do to get approved for weight loss surgery. Most of it is going to be simple, but there is one little thing that I know I'm going to have trouble with....getting the weight loss history for the past five years!! I can't understand how I'm going to be able to get this, we've moved and I've switched doctors over the last five years. I am hoping that I can find enough evidence to support this, but honestly, I don't even know if I've been to the doctor's office every year for the last five years. I can account for last year and the year before that, but my memory fades when I try to go back that far. I'm going to schedule an appointment with my primary care physician tomorrow and when I see him I'll ask how long I've been coming and whether I have that documentation or not. Do doctor's keep those records that long, enough if you're not a patient anymore? I have no idea, but I guess I'll find out. I don't understand how insurance can deny you if you don't have just one of those years to vouch for.
There were a lot of other people there for their first visit to begin the medically supervised weight loss for surgery. I was kind of surprised. We all received information on how to get approved and then listened to the dietitian talk about what we should be eating. I have to lose at least ten pounds without gaining anything in order to be approved...from what they were telling us. I think I can do that...especially since it isn't a good idea to gain anymore weight...surgery wouldn't be as safe then. I know I need to buckle down and really get into eating better, because that will make the transition that much easier after surgery. I am really worried about that five year thing...if that is what holds me back from getting approved, I think I will be crushed! I'm going to try and think positive thoughts, because I truly want to be healthy again!! Tomorrow, I will begin to make small changes in my eating habits...one thing at time...and then hopefully, the next time I visit the doctor's office, I'll be a little lighter! :)
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There were a lot of other people there for their first visit to begin the medically supervised weight loss for surgery. I was kind of surprised. We all received information on how to get approved and then listened to the dietitian talk about what we should be eating. I have to lose at least ten pounds without gaining anything in order to be approved...from what they were telling us. I think I can do that...especially since it isn't a good idea to gain anymore weight...surgery wouldn't be as safe then. I know I need to buckle down and really get into eating better, because that will make the transition that much easier after surgery. I am really worried about that five year thing...if that is what holds me back from getting approved, I think I will be crushed! I'm going to try and think positive thoughts, because I truly want to be healthy again!! Tomorrow, I will begin to make small changes in my eating habits...one thing at time...and then hopefully, the next time I visit the doctor's office, I'll be a little lighter! :)
Consultation with Surgeon
Feb 25, 2009
Well, after a month of waiting for this day, it finally came. I went to see the surgeon and my family came with me. It seemed like a long wait, and the visit with him wasn't very long, but long enough, I suppose. I got weighed on one of those Tanita scales which gives all of the info that you never really wanted to know...like how much of a percentage your body is of fat...I think I actually knew that already! LOL We discussed a few things and he examined me...found out I have a hernia, which I have never actually knew I had. He says since I am still young, and obesity hasn't struck me with a bunch of major side effects like diabetes and such, that surgery would be a great option for me at this point. He thinks I would do very well, and when asked which surgery he would recommend, he said the RNY gastric bypass. He thinks my age and overall health make me a good candidate. I kind of agreed, but am still not convinced on which surgery I would like to do. I know that you lose more the first year with RNY, but the cutting still makes me nervous. I have been open to the idea though and will continue to do my research. The doctor is going to send out a letter to my insurance company tomorrow to see if we can get this approval thing going. He said it should take a month to hear back from them...nothing like taking their time, huh? Anyway, Tuesday I'm all set up for the first nutritional meeting, because my insurance company does require some medically supervised weight plan. I think my husband found it all a little much to take in...the thought of me having surgery probably hit home a little because he was getting teared up in the examining room. When I asked him about it later, he said he is just wanting to make sure that I get the best care and the worry hit him a little, but the surgeon did calm his fears a bit. He wants me to feel better and have my dreams of weight loss come true. He knows more than anyone how I struggle each day to do things and how much I want to do more but can't. I'm very happy that he loves me that much! :) Well, now it's on with the learning part...I'm going to research all I can...and hopefully, by the time I am ready to have the surgery, I will have a clear mind as to which was is right for me! Today was a busy day, but it was a great day...the start of a great journey and I know I will succeed!!
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Tomorrow's the big day!
Feb 24, 2009
Well, I never thought that time would go by so quickly, but tomorrow is the day I meet my surgeon and begin the journey. I'm really looking forward to it, but I hope that I'm not getting exciting only to be let down. I am hoping that the process to be approved for surgery won't be a long one, although I do know that it will be well worth it. I've waited this many years with being overweight, why should I not expect to wait a little longer. We'll see and I'll know more tomorrow. My husband and my daughters are coming with me, because I really feel that it will be a good meeting for them. My oldest was very worried about me having surgery. She heard all of the bad things that can happen, and wondered why I couldn't do this on my own. I took her to the informational session and after hearing the surgeon go over all of the aspects, she felt much better about the whole thing. I also feel very blessed that they all want to come along with me and be my support. I will definitely need it over the next few months to get to the point of surgery. I also know that having them be there will help me remember things later. From experience with my husband's surgery, I can remember hearing the heart surgeon coming out and talking to me after my husband's valve replacement surgery...I can honestly say that the only words I remember hearing were that he was okay and that he was in recovery and I would be able to see him soon. I know he talked about the procedure and what he did and all that, but I didn't remember it...I still can't!! If my mom and sister weren't with me, I would swear that he said nothing about it! :) It's going to be a bit overwhelming, I'm sure, but tomorrow will be a good day...I have that in my head. This is the year that I am going to change me...a complete makeover...and I don't just mean for looking better. I want to feel better. I want to be able to do simple physical activities with my family...I want to be able to tie my own shoes without feeling out of breath...I want to be able to take a shower with ease...I want to be able to fit into a booth at a restaurant without worrying about embarrassing myself, and so so much more. These are all simple things, but everyone who has been overweight knows that they are not easy things for us. Tomorrow will be a good day and I'm truly looking forward to beginning this change!! :)
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First Meeting with Surgeon
Feb 21, 2009
I have my first meeting with the surgeon coming up this Wednesday, February 25th. I'm really excited but also a little nervous. In the past, I have researched weight loss surgery and have gone so far as to attend informational sessions, but never scheduled a meeting. I have finally decided that this is the time for me. I am not exactly sure what he will recommend or what he will have me doing for the next few months. I know my insurance requires medically supervise weight loss for a period of time, which I think is six months. When the receptionist called me to schedule the appointment, she did say that they will help me with the requirements that my insurance company has in order to have the surgery. I'm not sure which surgery I would like to have and I think I'm going to listen to what the surgeon has to say and what he would recommend. I know I don't have to make that decision right away, so there isn't as much pressure there. I'm a little anxious to get the whole process going so that I can begin living the kind of life I want to live...full of energy and without as much restriction as I am now. I can't wait for Wednesday to get here!!
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About Me
Sandwich, IL
Location
51.4
BMI
Surgery
11/17/2009
Surgery Date
Feb 21, 2009
Member Since
