johjen

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I thought I would take a few moments and blog about my experience with TWH Bariatric journey so far...

My journey started in July 2012 (when I decided to get bariatric surgery but had to first quit smoking, get married, etc).  I made an appointment with my Family Doctors Nurse Practitioner.  ( My family Doctor is Dr. Peter Goldfarb and I was afraid that he would not refer me, and it takes me forever to get an apt with him so the Nurse Practitioner was my best option).  My appointment with the Nurse Practitioner was on October 26th, and my referral  was faxed on that day while I was in the office.  For the next two weeks I was in constant email contact with the registry to make sure that I knew when they received my referral and could then start folloing up with TWH. 

My first appointment was ORIENTATION on November 28th, 2012.  I called in to get this moved up a number of times and was able to get this date ahead of my invitation that was "In the Mail".   Be careful if you take this path because there is some information that you need to know, like what floor and room number ;)... I would also suggest you leave well early for the apt!  I live 30 minutes away, left an hour early and was 20 mintues late!  This apt is full of great information, you are given a package with all the information that the instructor went over, also in the package is a food diary, psycological evaluation, etc... that you need to fill out before your next apt.

My next apt was the SOCIAL WORK INITIAL ASSESSMENT, on December 19th, 2012.  At this apt I had to hand in my filled in paperwork, and was asked all kinds of questions about my history, psychological state, any abuse, depression, etc... its not as scary as it sounds!  My only complaint was that the nurse kept coming back to the same questions over and over again, making me think she felt I was being dishonest, when I had nothing to hide... it was like she couldn't believe that this fat girl in front of her didn't have an abuse history... Oh well.. next...

I had my next apt scheduled for Feb 26th with the NURSE PRACTITIONER... I was able to get this apt moved up to Feb 14th.  At this apt I was weighed (264lbs), the nurse went over my health history, medications, family history, decided that I did not need a sleep test... etc.. At this apt she will order blood work... I fasted without being asked because I knew that it was necessary, so I was able to get that all done in one day.. blood work and an ECG.  Easy peasy and on my way

On Feb 19th I had My NUTRITION CLASS and PSYCHO-SOCIAL ASSESSMENT.  The Nutrition class is very informative and they give you information to take with you about the vitamins and suppliments that you will need to take after surgery along with what kind of foods to eat and the stages... you do get to try opti-fast here (Please for the love of God people, Opti is non-negotable, suck it up we will all have to drink it for AT least 2 weeks... its not that bad!)... At the Psycho-Social assessment you meet with a psychogist.  (they are only interested in determining if you can mentally handle the lifestyle changes that will be coming your way... they are not interested in Healing you of all your problems... if you need that I suggest you seek help seperate from the bariatric clinic)  I do not have any mental health issues so my apt was over in less than 20 minutes... as I walked out of this apt the guy at the desk informed me that he had a cancellation for the NUT... So I was able to get my last apt done on this day too!  I did my NUT homework in the waiting room (helped that I have a food diary on my phone)... this was an extension of the NUT Class... she went over my food diary and informed me I was only missing fruit daily in my diet but she felt that I was ready to move on!

My FINAL Apt is scheduled for April 5th with Dr. Todd Penner... (I went to my sisters surgeon apt so....) if you make it to this apt you are through... this is your opportunity to meet the surgeon, ask any questions you may have.  He/she will give you more information, forms for work, YOUR SURGERY DATE!  At this apt you have to bring a credit card (prepaid is fine) to pay for and order opti fast..

My process has been 6 months from referral to Surgeon apt... I hope my date is not too far off!  I am excited to move into the rest of my life.  I am ready for this!

 

Good afternoon everyone!

Okay so I have to admit that I have been obsessed with everyone else's journey's and I have been all up on youtube watching.  I really appreciate everyone that comes here and goes to youtube to share their stories.  What I love the best is the honesty!  Its nice to see everyone's before and after pictures and daydream about how I may look in a year from now after the surgery, but what I really want to see is how you were feeling a week before surgery, 12 hours after surgery a week out etc... step by step.  I want the realities.  There is a video on YouTube that I am going to put the link on the bottom of this page.  I love it.  It is so raw in emotion and honest and heartbreaking yet hopeful. 

This process is not going to be easy.  I know that, I too will have my crying, snotting, curl up in a ball, what did I do to myself days... I plan on sharing those moments with you all as the process unfolds for me.    Herecomestrouble88 shared her post op breakdown, and I am so thankful for her honesty and for sharing this moment.  This is real!  She also documented her dumping syndrome and all of  her victories... She really shared an all around well rounded view of her experience!  For that I am thankful.

Check out herecomestrouble88 on YouTube to watch her story.. below is the link to her post op Breakdown... She felt it, she experienced it, she shared it and she got over it...  The beauty of this is that as these moments unfold and we learn how to change so completely and feel the stress of loss, and mourn our food addictions and our eating habits, having knowledge that the moment will pass and we will be okay and in time you will be happy with your new eating habits and your new relationship with food. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU2hltDcCqo&feature=plcp

As I am beginning this journey two things are happening, 1 I am obsessed with the journey, I want to know everything, and I am reasearching like a mad woman, thus it is all I am talking about, planning for etc.  #2 I am trying to work out how I got to be so fat, I want to make sure that when I get the surgery I am prepared with the emotional triggers that lead me to over eat.

Having said that I don't think I am an emotional eater the way others are emotional eaters.  I tend to eat as a celebration, at gatherings or when something is going well. on those occasions I binge eat, I also eat if I am board (which is weird because I am never board... I always have things to do) but if I get the opportunity to sit and read a book watch a movie I tend to take a trip to the store for "snacks" first. 

I had a good childhood with good parents, there is no history of childhood abuse for me that has lead me to food as a means to "stuff" history.  My mother came from a family of 8 and had some childhood issues and as a result of those issues she overate.  My sister and I grew up in an overeating house.  I believe we just learned to eat more than we needed because we learned how to eat from over eaters.

Anywho....

In my process of figuring out what I am going to have to change about myself to make this journey successful for me I have come to some conclusions about how I allow myself to be treated as a result of my weight.  Unfortunately I have allowed myself to be treated in these ways for all of my life... the reolization that I have allowed and even promoted this mistreatment has got me so emotional and angry.  I am suddenly reacting to things that I have allowed with a smile for all of my life.  For example, this weekend my wife invited a friend over for the day,  My wife and this friend both don;'t drive.  So I as voluntold that "we" were going to pick this friend up.  Now for the most part I don't mind picking non drivers up, but here is the problem with this situation.  First, I was not asked in advance if I would pick the friend up, I was just told that we offered minutes before,  Second is that my wife and our non driving friends get to spend the day having a few drinks etc, while I have been made the designated driver (AGAIN) and have to watch them have their drinks, so I can then drive the friend back home again and then listen to the same friends and my wife tell me that I need to "get my groove back" meaning I need to relax and enjoy some drinks with them (Ummm hello you are making me drive),  Third, my friends EXPECT that I will do this stuff because I have always allowed it.

I think the third point is the one that bothers me the most.  I have been the fat kid for most of my life, I have for most of my life put everyone else ahead of me.  I offered up my parents to take me and my friends where ever we wanted to go, I was the kid who was doing everything for my friends growing up while they took advantage of me.  I allowed it because I wanted them to like me.

Now in my adult life I am still doing it, and I am angry with myself.  When my wife wakes up in the morning and asks me to make coffee (which I don't drink) I am feeling a burst of frusteration, which is not fair to her, I have always made her coffee in the morning, 

I am starting to bring these things out into the light and look at them, then I am sharing them with my wife.  I need the dynamic of my relationships with other people to change BEFORE my surgery,  I need to stop allowing people to take advantage of me all the time.   Now just to find the right ways to express my need for this change without making the other people in my life feel like a$$ holes.  It is not their fault, it is mine, I know that.  The people in my life today are good people, I have in some ways insisted that others take advantage of me and I set that presidence.  Now I have to work on breaking that.

 

I got my appointment with the NP today and walked in all nervous... I put together my package-o-reasons for why I feel I should have WLS, family history etc...

I told the NP that I quit smoking so I can get this done and she said ... "wow you really did your homework."  and then "Lets get you registered".. She logged right onto the bariatric registration website and filled out the form with me right there on the spot... then she faxed it right off. 

Thank you so much everyone that offered advise on how to approach this with my GP or NP... your tips and tricks worked like a charm... Not only did they say yes but they did so with a smile!

Now on to step #3 follow up with the registry next week... (let the harrassment begin)...

Yay!

Okay so I did it!  I called the dr's office and asked to see a NP instead of waiting for my dr to be available in more than a month...

I am just not that patient!

So now I have an appointment for tomorrow afternoon...

I am putting all my ducks in a line... there will be no turning me down!

Fingers crossed!

Write a whole detailed explination about my second step, then move off the page by accident and loose it!

So the short version is.

Called for a dr's apt, next available is Nov 28th (which is unacceptable, imo)

So I am going to call and see if I can see a nurse practicioner earlier for a referral.

AND I think because my twin has been through all this... they should just book me in for the operation and skip all the middle stuff... we are both good candiates for this operation. 

Just sayin!

it sounds fair to me!

This is me on my Wedding day September 15th 2012. 

I have been overweight all of my life, when I was young it was just a little plump for my age, then puberty hit!  My twin sister and I began eating my parents out of house and home.  When I think back on those days it amazes me that we were able to fit that much food into our early teen bodies.  From there both of us just ballooned.  Today I weight 265lbs, a weight I never in a million years imagined that I would ever get to.  Alas here I am.

Like anyone else who struggles with their weight I have been on every diet imaginable.  Believe it or not I even tried eating well and excercising!  I have limited success and then i end up bigger than when I started dieting.  This yo-yo has to stop.  So far I have no co-morbidities, my blood pressure is good, no diebeties, or heart problems.  So I want to take perminant control of this problem before those problems start to creep up on me.

My twin sister started this journey about 6 months ago and is looking like her operation will be late this year.  I would have liked to be at the same point as her by now but I had to quit smoking and be smoke free for 6 months.  I am now smoke free and ready to start the process. 

Step 1 make a dr's apt and get a referrial.