jessikadenae
10/26/02 - I am so ready for this... I started TWICE before and got really scared but this time I am sooooo ready.
The trick is going to be not putting a lot of weight back on while I go through the stress of waiting and dealing with the insurance company. The waits appear to be getting longer and longer. Maybe all this jumping through hoops will help me to keep some of this weight off. lol JT.
11/02/02 - Well, I have sent away my letter requesting pre-authorization for the surgery. My weight has caused something called a panis. The letter I send off includes a request for this to be removed at the same time the WLS is performed. I am not sure if Cigna will allow this but I am hoping. It will help in allowing me to exercise and stuff after the surgery.
I was a little frustrated for a while. I have begun to do a bunch of things that will be requested after I see the surgeon, like a psychological. There was some confusion between my PCP's office, Cigna & my mental health insurance (which is the same name of the company I work for so I am keeping that private). Ultimately I got it all worked out and have an appointment for 11/11/02.
My biggest problem right now is the waiting. A friend of mine at work is going Through the same process. She started before me and has been to her seminar that our surgeon requires. At the seminar she was told that Dr Blackstone was setting surgery dates for Jan. & Feb of next year. That is 3-4 months from now. I do not have my seminar appointment until Nov. 17th. This makes me think that my appointment will not be until April or May. Surgery may be even later.
I have been learning to live in the present but since I made the decision to get the surgery done, I have been living in the future. And the more time passes the more I am living in the future...until I start to lose after surgery. I have been putting off buying new clothes, which I need so bad. It is sad. I have not bought new clothes in many years. I want to ride a bike again. Won't buy one until after surgery. I inherited a motorcycle from a friend that needs some work to be able to ride it and I won't do any work on it until after surgery. I need a new job. The one I currently have was close to driving me crazier than I already was. I have put all I feel about it on hold, so the insurance can pay for surgery. I am so totally living in the future.
I have started eating crazy again. With Halloween being here, I was eating my favorite candies. I had not had candy in at least 2 years. I went to my naturopathic Dr and she is very concerned. We are working together to get my body as healthy as it can be so that I heal quickly from surgery. She told me if I don't stop the sugars and carbs that she will not work with me. So as of Today...NO MORE SUGAR or WHEAT!!!! JT
11/09/02...Well, the letter I sent to Cigna got a response, but not the one I thought it would. They used my cover sheet and faxed me back that my surgeon needs to request the surgery for "medical necessity". But they did tell me that I should make sure that my surgeon gets a copy of my letter and that it should be re-submitted to them with her info. From what they said in their response it appears that they read my letter. Which is a good thing.
I don't know if anyone is reading this because I haven't posted any pictures but if someone is, I have decided that even though it is my work e-mail address I put it back on so that I can receive e-mails. I would really like to hear from someone out there.
My naturopathic Dr has given me a slightly new perspective on the waiting game. When we talked about it last, she said that this time between now and actual surgery is good cause I can get into better shape physically and so my body will heal faster after surgery. So I am trying real hard to convince myself of that.
Those of you out there waiting as I am and those who are post - op you are in my prayers. Thanks for putting your stories on these pages, I get great support from your stories. JT
11/27/02 - I turned my medical screening into Dr. Blackstone's office today. I was informed that she is about 2 weeks behind in contacting people for the consult appointment. I am so afraid that the appointment I get won't be until April of next year. That would make my surgery in May, June or July depending... I can't believe that I started this in Sept.
I went to the seminar and enjoyed meeting Dr Blackstone. I was still afraid prior to attending the seminar but during her talk there was a peace that settled over me. I still have a caution about it as I realize that people have died from the surgery but I have a feeling inside of me that things will be OK.
There is some of the waiting game going on but I am trying to get things done that Dr Blackstone is going to ask for before she will schedule surgery or even write the letter to my insurance company. I am driving my PCP and her nurse crazy with all the referrals I am asking for. At the seminar Dr. Blackstone suggested that I get a sleep study done. Plus she requires everyone to be up to date on their Well-woman exams. So my PCP's nurse is requesting all kinds of services for me.
I had a friend take some before pictures. So I will try to post them as soon as she e-mails them to me... I will also have her take some just before surgery.
Take care everyone....Happy Thanksgiving!!!
11/30/02 - Talking to a friend who started this just prior to me and she said that consult appointments were in April way back in Sept. at her seminar.
I have been on the chat a couple of times and met a woman who had surgery a couple of years ago. We are going to meet this Sunday. I wonder if I will remember all my questions.
The friend who took the pictures of me is a web master and I may be posting my story on a web page. I really would like to do pictures and weights and maybe my BMIs.
Hope everyone had a good turkey day. : )~~~ JT
12/07/02 - Well, as you can now tell the pictures are posted. Since the pictures were posted I have received a couple of e-mails that have been very supportive...Thanks.
I have been making appointments that Dr. Blackstone will need to get this approved Through my insurance. I have a sleep study appointment on 12/20/02. I am really wondering how this will go because I am sooo set in my ways when I sleep due to pain in my back if I sleep wrong. (I have also slept on a water bed for 15 yrs..)
My naturopathic Dr. wants me go on a special diet that is supposed to help get my body ready for surgery, so that my body will heal faster. Part of what she suggests is balancing my colon.
It is kinda weird. All this waiting... thinking about moving into a new apartment. Want something with a little more privacy. I can move within my complex or to a triplex that a friend owns. I am thinking about all this and wondering when my surgery will be, cause I don't want to do anything that will overlap with surgery. Surgery is the priority. So I have some decisions to make but not sure how cause of the waiting. I don't even know when Dr. Blackstone is making consultation appointments. Since my friend's was made way back in Sept. and her consult is in Feb., I figure that mine will be in April. So if my consultation with Dr. Blackstone is in April then my surgery won't be until May or June. Sorry I know I have written about this before but I am getting a little impatient. Part of it has gone very fast but... and there are things that I would really like to do in the beginning of next year that would be better if I was losing the weight.
I need clothes so bad. What I now wear is altered smocks, night wear, etc. I sew so I have altered things so they fit and cover parts of me that I don't want showing. I have been wearing the same clothes for years. They are stained across my 'shelf'. They have been taken in and let out so many times they can almost sew themselves. Who wants to buy new BIG clothes. I don't mind buying many different clothes of different sizes as I lose but to buy new clothes in my big sizes really makes me depressed.
Well, I hope that all of you are having a good day. good luck to all who are waiting and here’s hoping the pounds roll off for those have finished surgery. JT
12/11/02 - Hello, all. Just wanted to up-date on what's happening. As noted before I had turned in my medical records about 2 weeks ago. Staff at Dr Blackstone's office told me she was about 2 weeks behind in scheduling initial consultation appointments. So I called today to see what was up... I am a little frustrated as Jamie told me that I would not be getting a call until the new year. 2-3 more weeks. I asked when she was setting appointments for and was told in Feb. or March. That's OK, cause that was when she was setting them back in Sept. So after the initial I may get to have surgery in April or May which is better than it was looking. Dr. Blackstone has hired a NP to do some of the initials, so that makes things move quicker.
Dr. Blackstone requires each patient to be up on their Well Man & Woman exams. I am a little behind. I just got my Pap and was referred for a mammogram and pelvic ultrasound (to check my ovaries & uterus). The NP that did my exam was really good.
It is getting real hard to sleep these days. I used to get 6-7 hrs with some tossing and turning but lately I have been waking up every 2-3 hrs and having a hard time falling back asleep. Not sure if it is the stress related to the sleep study that is coming up or any of my other issues (ie stress, anxiety or the switching of my work shifts).
Well, I am trying to get as ready as I can. Friends at work and home are very supportive. Some of the women at work are teasing me about buying me a red leather thong to wear to work in about a year. I get into sharing the profiles (before and after pics).
Just bought a laptop (which I have been wanting for a while) for when I am convalescing. My next purchase is a recliner. Think I want a rocker/recliner. This was recommended by a couple of post-ops here on the site. They say it is easier to get in and out of. I have a little concern about the first week after. I live alone and am thinking about seeing if someone can stay with me for the first week.
I look back on all I have been writing and did not realize I write so much. Hope that all who read find something interesting here. Good luck to all. : )~~~~~~ JT
12/28/02 - Well, it has been a while since I updated this part of my profile... Hope that everyone has had a very good Christmas.
Since my last entry, I have completed a sleep study. Will probably have to go on the c-Pap machine. in part this really good but I find it so scary that when I usually just roll over I am waking up totally and having a hard going back to sleep.
My doctor have put me on high blood pressure meds. seems like I have seen more doctors in the last six then I have in my entire life.
I also had a pap which came out OK. Have mammogram and ultrasound scheduled for sometime in Jan. Dr Blackstone will not consider anyone for surgery unless they are up to date on yearlies. So more doctors.
I am getting somewhat impatient. So many of us on the chat have surgery scheduled in Jan and Feb. I am so jealous. I don't even have a consult with my surgeon yet.
Well, be talking to you again. Probably when I get a consult date!!! Wish me luck!
01/07/03 - Well, GUESS WHAT?! I got a consult date!!! It was really funny, because I called Dr. Balckstone's office and whoever answered the phone was really short with me about how backed up they are and told me it would be about 3 more weeks before I would get an appointment. So, of course, I was really disappointed. Then toward the end of the same crazy day, I get a call. The call came Through at work and and the caller said they wanted to make a consult appointment with me for Dr. Blackstone. You should have seen my face. I sat there until Jamie said my name and asked if I wanted to make the appointment. It was so funny. I got this great rush and it was hard to keep me in my seat. We made an appointment a month earlier than I thought. I took first available. So, I now have my consult appointment for FEB 18 at 8:30am. I am so excited. YYYYaaaaaahhhhooooooooooooo!
02/10/03 - So it has been a long time since I have documented on this page. Well, my consult appointment is coming up and I am getting nervous. My peer here at work is telling me that noreen at Dr. Blackstones office thinks she will get denied the first time, because she doesn't have the weigh ins that Cigna requires. I don't have them either. I do have some documentation of the different diets programs I have had over the last 2 years. Not sure what will be happening with all of this. I am still pulling in an April 2003 surgery appointment. would you please pray for me in this endeavor. Thanks for all of you out there that keep a close watch on us as we go Through this process. Be talking to you again after consult. Have a magical day!! JT
02/19/03 - Hey All! Had my consult appointment yesterday. It went really good. Dr. Blackstone has hired a Nurse Practitioner to help her with the routine consults. His name is Randy and I like him. He is really personable and appears very comfortable with obese people.
Now the real waiting begins. Noreen from Dr. Blackstones office should have my request letter off to Cigna by Monday at the latest. Then I have to start waiting for Cigna to get back to me with their decision. I am going to have an appeal letter ready to send to them cause Noreen said they are denying about 95% of the requests. So the game con'ts. If you have e-mailed me lately I have not been able to get on my computer for a while due to my land line being down. I have been very busy at work and can not get into my yahoo mail box during work hours. So as soon as the line is fixed I will be getting back to you as soon as I can. Thanks for the e-mails. JT
02/26/03 - Hello All! Well, it has been a little bit of a ride. I got a letter from Dr. Blackstones office and they were postponing my surgery for at least 3 months due to the psychological. I called Dr. Kao and she contacted my surgeon's office and spoke with the NP. and finally I got a call today and they have changed my classification and they are putting me in for surgery as soon as possible. YEAH!!!!! The NP called today and Dr. Kao had really gone to bat for me and helped convince them that I could more than handle the surgery. Randy Hamilton the NP, said that she really was a good lady and very supportive of me. I am so happy. Was thinking of sending her something as a thank you. So now I am just waiting for Cigna insurance to approve me!!!
Hope all of you are doing good. good luck and great spirit bless you!!! Jazzi Jessika
03/17/03 - Well, talk about frustrated!!! I have just got the decision from Cigna and I was denied surgery. They say I do not have the required doctor supervised diets over the last 3 years. There is a letter in the file that tells what diets I have been on over the last year and the doctor who supervised me Through the process. I am so frustrated i could scream and cry. I spoke with a supervisor at Cigna and he is going to check my file for that info and get back to me in about 2 days. God, I hope they do this the right way and let me have surgery. Hope all you other guys are having a better day than me. JT
06/13/03 - OK so it has been months since I updated and a lot has happened since the last note left here including my surgery. I had LAP RNY completed on June 9th from 3:45 pm to 7:30 pm by Dr. Robin Balckstone and her wonderful surgical crew. They worked on me for an extra 2 hours to keep my surgery LAP and to give me the best possible results. They were and are wonderful.
I was only in the hospital for 3 days one of those being my day of surgery. Of those, I spent on day in ICU and one on the regular floor. I received the best care everywhere that I went. Each step of the way was very smooth and easy. (the only complaint was the placing of my IV but that was small potato's to the rest of the experience.) If you count the hours that I NEEDED to be in the hospital I only needed to be there from about 2pm on Monday June 9th for pre-op to Wednesday at about 9am after the lasiks (water meds) began to work. That is only 48 hours so really I was only there 2 days. and I have been home since Wednesday and feel wonderful. I did not use the on-call pain meds and was up and walking with in hours of getting into ICU. And by the time I left the hospital I was walking around the nurse's station eight times. The nurses were very proud of my ability to bounce back from this surgery. I believe that it is a combination of the excellent treatment I received from Dr. Blackstone and her surgical team and my own attitude about what was happening and the pain involved in the process. I used my spiritual learnings to help me keep everything in perspective. had three mantras or sayings: 1. the pain is there to tell me I am alive and that I am healing. 2. the depression and feeling of being down are due to the anesthesia. AND 3. Head hunger is due the the detoxification off sugars and carbs and I am learning how to cope with that. I also keep telling myself that this surgery is JUST a tool and I need to deal with my emotional issues and my issues around food and using food to stuff my emotions. So if you wished to ask, I am still so glad I had this surgery and there has been no buyers remorse. I am doing great and know that I will cont to do great.
Not sure if I will be up-dating this very often anymore but maybe sometimes as I lose and post the after pics. My intent is to be a big loser and get it done soon and right. I also intend to do everything in my power to not have my gall bladder removed. So I post how that is going and how I am doing on that - if I remember.
If you wish you may be able to catch me in the CHAT ROOM under Jazzi Jessika. hope you all are doing good and you all are in my prayers for cont assistance and support. Jazzi
06/10/04 - Hello all!!!
It has been a long time since I have been here and put an update anywhere. There are so many changes in my life since surgery...
Yesterday was my one year anniversary... I have lost about 180 pounds and two clothes sizes. People don't know me cause I have changed so much.
So many people give credit to God for the changes and good things that have happened in their lives... Well I would like to give myself credit for using the Free Will that the Great Spirit gives us to have made this choice and done so with physical mastery. I also credit my surgeon and her awesome team for the dedication and impecible surgery that was performed. This one choice and change has lead to numerous others within my life including increased self-esteem.
I have begun to do things in my life that I have always dreamed of: am raising a puppy (malimute and wolf mix); Changed jobs within the same company; bought a new truck (Chevy 4x4); dating (including sex--Oh! My! God! did I say the 'S' word); JUST BOUGHT MY FIRST HOUSE (one week ago)!!!!!
I do need to get pics taken to show the 180 pounds lost;
Take care of yourselves all and be good to you!
As always you can reach me at my e-mail address [email protected].
07/30/05
OH MY GOD.... ITS BEEN OVER A YEAR SINCE i HAVE BEEN BACK TO UPDATE THIS!!!!
Still need new picks!!! Looked at the old ones and cringed... although I do carry a old pick around with me to remind myself what was and to show people who don't beleive my story.
I continue to lose, not as fast as I would like but it is happening. I had the pannus removed in Feb. of this year and came thru that surgery with flying colors... Have a scar from hip to hip for that but the difference to my body and my ability to move is amazing.
No longer in a relationship but looking... as things change within my body more shit pops up in my emotional and the way I look at myself and the negitive patterns that I run... was talking to a friend yesterday about how I still don't think that I am worth getting into a relationship with. I stayed with someone for 9 years in a very bad space because I thought that no one else would want me and I still think that inside me somewhere I still believe that cause otherwise I would be in a relationship. You know this is as bad as a diary... I start typing here and things roll out of me that I never thought I would write... lol.
Well you got a little more about me here and some of what I am going thru... it is amazing how life changes...
good luck all..
01/13/06
Its Friday the 13th and life is changing....have a date to get new pics taken... you will so see the difference... ain't at goal yet but getting there...
I changing and dealing with the issues that got me fat in the first place... As I wrote before my biggest issue is the relationships... still having issues with finding that person who is willing to engage with me on the same level...
Doing some spiritual/sexual work this year to help heal the trauma of the past and continue the healing of my body and soul... it is a feeling and knowing that it is only thru the dealing with issues of the past and how I see myself and my life that this addiction with food will find an end...
This update is a little strange but I hope you know or see parts of the real me thru this...
Will be keeping in touch...
03/11/07
Hello all!
Can't believe it has been a year since I was last here... so many things have changed and happened in my life... including this website... I just went into the chat room and there is no one there that I know from before... I also downloaded some new photos that are already old but have a better picture of what I actually look like now...
I am starting a new business, am seeing someone new and loving every minute we are together... been seeing him for 3 weeks now...
Life is sooo different then before surgery... and I love it so much... never thought I would be soooo happy... not content yet as I have lots of things I desire to do... am constantly busy... working and playing... have taken up country dance... and just spent 2 hours dancing last night... had a blast.. (in the new pics you can see me two stepping with my teacher)....
Have joined a online dating service and am meeting new people both men & women... it is fun trying to fit them into my social schedule... doing a lot of gettig to know people by e-mail... learning to improve my writing skills.... just got web service in my home which helps... do lots of my writing in the early am or late at night after a full day of playing or working...
Need to finish eating my breakfast before it gets cold...
well, thanks for reading and hope you learned lots from my page...
take care...
Jazzi