Melissa G.
I grew up in the 70's and 80's in So. Cal and even though I was only 20 lbs overweight I thought I was a cow. I basically starved myself for years in high school and ran 5k's to no avail the 20 lbs was my ball and chain. Then I broke my ankle in my freshman year of college so with the typical freshman year weight I packed on an extra 40 lbs. If I thought I was a cow before now I was disgusting and to top it all off I had developed a really bad case of acne. I dropped out of college cause I didn't fit in the seats and I couldn't walk to my seat without rubbing my big butt in someone's face. I got a crappy job hidden away in a back office where people could only hear me on the phone. The social pressure went away, but my boyfriend of two years was fading as well. Once I was left to myself, I actually focused on myself and lost 55 lbs. on the three day diet. I gained another boyfriend and got a better job. The better job ment more socializing and the boyfriend who liked having me all to himself, well that didn't work so bye bye boyfriend number two. Hello playing the field for four months till I broke my ankle again. This time I only gained 20 lbs. and the better job wasn't so great anymore when I realized in August that I hadn't been to the beach all summer due to being chained to my desk. I had a mini life crisis and went to Hawaii for 5 days and came back and joined the Navy. This was a great thing but I was in the delayed entry program and after 9 months I was overweight and the Navy gave me two weeks to loose the extra weight. Thankfully, I made it by two lbs. and a prayer. Once in bootcamp I faired well lost another 15 lbs. and gained a lot of muscle. Then it was off to Pensecola FL. to training then to Sicily, Italy for my first duty station. Opps, did I say Italy. I was petrified, me and Italian food have a one way, life long love affair. I had the best will power of my life and breezed through the first physical fitness test and measurements. Only to have an injury that caused me to take steroids, so two months later when I had gained 30 horrifying lbs. I was doomed to a manditory 5 day exercise program come rain or shine. This kept me from gaining more and at the same time caused me to not heal from the injury. I was on a small base in Italy and 99% of the people snickered and treated me very badly because I was a fat Navy female, nevermind it was doing my job that caused me to get hurt in the first place. I made it through to the end of my four year enlistment with several cases of shin splints (due to running on concrete and step aerobics five times a week for years). The good thing is I was married, but the bad thing was two months after I got married my hubby was shipped out to California and I had to stay for another 14 months. Let's just say that being that lonely can be emotionally unhealthy and I made some decisions that don't make sense to even myself. Once I was out of the Navy I meet up with my hubby and we worked through some tough times. I got pregnant with my son Michael only 4 short months after getting out of the Navy. I started full time college two months later. I was on top of the world, just to have 9-11 bring me and all of us down. I'm not saying I gained weight because of 9-11, I'm saying that my hubby was gone most of the time because he was security for the base. So I'm in the middle of the desert, pregnant and going to college full time. Let's just say I was lonely once again and back in college and pregnant equalling 65 lbs. of weight gain. That's 265 at seven months prego. Then I got toximia 20 lbs. of water weight and I was in the hospital 4 weeks early. Michael came out two and half weeks later by emergency c-section. One week out my insision was infected, two weeks later I was back in school full time. I lost the 25 lbs. of water weight but at 265 bls. I didn't fit into the seats at school again. I kept on going and got my degree. My last finals week my ankles blew up like ballons and it dawned on me that the last time the did that I was ut oh prego, and Michael was only 14 months old. Then surprise, my hubby didn't get orders to Washington state he got orders back to Italy, thank god at least I wasn't in the Navy this time. Katie came out one month to early because I was very sick. Emergency c-section and the most beautiful blue eye's I'd ever seen. What's that she's not breathing well, I don't get to hold her, she's being flown to Germany and I can't go with her and it's Christmas Eve. Let's just say that Christmas 2003 is the single worst day of my life. (which makes it hard when people find out Katie's birthday and say that must have been a great Christmas - uh no). I spent most of the day alone, Micheal was almost two and the hospital was not place for him and since my hubby was the only one who could watch him, that left me alone away from my family in Cali, my hubby, my son on his second Christmas and my new baby who was in a different country. So, five days post op I'm chasing my son down the airport in Rome, ouch torn stitches. I finally got to see my baby girl in the NICU in Germany when she was five days old. Only to watch her struggle to breath, wondering that had I not been so fat maybe she would have been born without so much pain. Four painful and scary weeks later we were taking our baby girl home. Only, what's going on with Michael. I can't get him to look at me. I was thinking that he was mad at me for not being around, when at my first mommy and me play group I realized Michael had more in common with the just recently diagnosed Autistic child. I went home poured over the internet for info on Autism and went to his bed at 3 in the morning holding him and crying at the knowledge of knowing my son was Autistic. So I called who I had to had him evaluated only to have them tell me he only had developmental delays, NOT. So six long months of Michael not talking, tantrums and constantly being jumped on, bounced off of and carrying around the therapist said lets do the assessment for Autism, bingo. Oh, wait five months after having Katie I had my gallbladder removed, no stones the darn thing just didn't work. This is the first time I heard "you would be a good canidate for gastric bypass," and while I knew the surgeon and he had my best interest at hand it just confirmed to me what I had felt since I was a teenager, I'm a cow and now I know other people see it too. Then three months later a very female surgy were I almost stopped breathing during surgery because the weight on my chest was causing dangerously shallow breathing. But back to BINGO, November - therapist, parent assessment. December - Child Psycolgist testing. January - diagnosis AUTISM (Michael is in the bottom 3%). Febuary - orders to leave Italy (no programs overseas to support Autism). March 1st. 11pm eastern time, Norfolk International Airport. One very important best friend, one long lost angle in the form of my hubbies cousin, one toddler, one baby girl, no car, a apartment leased sight unseen (don't recomend), a hubby gone 16 hours a day due to VA traffic, and after we paid all our bills we were going in the red $100 a month. Just to find out that Michael couldn't start school for 6 months. If someone would have shot me then I would have thanked them. So off to another crappy job and my hubby and I getting no sleep. I was sent to the Naval Hospital for their Gastric Bypass program, but I just didn't feel comfortable with the way they run their program. Two years later, Michael is getting better, Katie is showing signs of being developly delayed and very angry about it we decided to move closer to my hubbies work since the best program for Michael at this point was actually in the same city, yea. Katie is delayed and going to school too, once again I'm sending my three year old on a huge bus to school (it's heartbreaking because I realize that I have missed the better half of her 2nd and 3rd year of life and now I'm sending her on a bus, double ouch way worse than anything physical). So, moving again for the 9th time in 10 years. Michael's in the special program, Katie is with a great teacher and my hubby left on a 6 month deployment 5 days after we moved in. Ahh, the commisary with Michael and Katie and carrying around 300 lbs. It's at this point I start waking up in the middle of the night throwing up. So I go to the Dr.'s only to find out I have dangerously high blood pressure. Guess what, now that I have moved to another city the base didn't have room for me at the local military clinic so I get farmed out to a private Dr. which means I can seek Gbypass from different Dr.'s and I know exactly which one I want because I had gone to his seminar a year before just to find out I had to go through the Naval Hospital. Then with the high blood pressure I jumped the final hurdle in the insurance requirements to get started on obtaining Gbypass. I ask the Dr.' on my second visit for HBP to send me to Dr. Terracina. He looked at me real close and asked how long I have been thinking out having the surgery. I told him four years (i.e. my friend the surgeon). The Dr. said yes and I went to another seminar with Dr.T, he does the surgery laproscopically. My mom comes to visit in December which was the first time in three years since I've seen her and she is unable to walk due to her weight. I went through all the appointments and sent my paperwork to insurance company in December just before my hubby gets home. Which made standing on the pier at over 300 lbs. seem not so bad because their was a serious chance that one year from that day I could be looking and feeling totally different. January I got the approval. Feb. 5th it will be, my hubby takes leave but then finds out he has a school in Florida five days after the surgery. So, fresh in from California on the day of the surgery my dad comes to my room at the hospital. My dad is a wonderful man who has HBP, diabites type 2, sleep apnea and had a stroke in 1999 he is also very much overweight. So habits or genes you take your pick but I had the deck stacked against me from the beginning. So while things aren't perfect in my turbulent life they are certainly not boring either.
