My Daughter

Aug 23, 2009

Tomorrow is the day, the day my daughter's life changes forever, as mine has, through gastric bypass surgery.  Even though I know she is in good hands, I cannot express how nervous and worried I am.  In front of her I am cool as a cucumber, but behind the scenes I cannot stop crying.  I don't know what I'll do if anything happens to her.  My feelings are running the gamut today.  Why did I allow her to get this heavy?  Why couldn't I have been a better role model?  What else could I have done to prevent her from getting morbidly obese?  The guilt is eating me up. 

Don't get me wrong.  I am happy that she was approved.  I know this is the help she needs.  I just can't help but feel that I could have been a better mother. 

I am going to stop thinking this way.  Tomorrow I must be strong and confident for her.  I am now being the role model I should have been since she was born.  I do trust the surgeon, I simply must.  Her life is in his hands tomrorow.  God, please guide him and heal my daughter quickly.  I love her so much, she is my very world. 

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