Erin C.
I have been overweight since I was about 12. I, like everyone else whose over weight have tried so many "diets" only to fail. I finally decided that I'm not doing it anymore, I went through hell and high water to get this surgery.
I am a mother of 5, Ashley 18, Kyle 15, Cheyenne 12, Madison 6, and Elijah 5. As well as a wife (for the 3rd time), Thanks in part to my weight. I have been "tired" since I was 15 yrs old (I'm now 34).....plain exhausted and very cloudy minded most of the time, unable to concentrate, spells of not being able to get out of bed to clean or take care of my kids, and it has only progressed as my weight has went up (I'm now 345). Of course Dr's told me I was depressed and I have been on an antidepressant since 16.I have had NO life whatsoever, JUST SLEEPING.
I've always had dreams of being a good mother and wife, going to college, getting a good paying job, (that I actually enjoy),buying a house, traveling, being able to walk more than 20 feet without having to set down from the pain, not being in pain all over my body, playing with my kids, having friends, (and not avoiding people in general at all cost), JUST BE NORMAL AND HAPPY!
I havn't really been there for my three oldest kids because I'm just so tired. I feel as though I have just let the past 19 years slip away.....and I have, and nothing can change that or give me back that time with my kids.
BUT, I know that theres no since in dwelling on the past, I still have 2 little ones to raise and I AM going to be there for them, and hopefully try to mend as much as I can with my 3 older ones. Ive been bitter for a very long time about my weight, lack of energy, fatigue and self image in general, and I know I have taken it out on the ones I love over the years, and I'm so sorry for that, I just wish my kids knew that it wasn't them.....it was me..........
I have big dreams now that my surgery is going to happen.....and I am so grateful that I am going to finally have a second chance at life....as they say about weight loss surgery....your surgery date, is in fact your new Birthday!!!!
And I cant wait to be born again!!!! So wish me luck on this Journey, I will post full body pics the week of my surgery, and I will keep you updated.~Erin 11/15/09 11:43 PM
