erdapr

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Surgery went well but I am in a bit of pain. I will post more later,

This is all so very surreal. Tomorrow is my last visit before my procedure in 2 weeks. I have been trying to get the procedure done for over 7 years and it is finally just around the corner. However, I cannot allow myself to get excited. I won't believe it until I am being wheeled in the o.r. Funny, after all this time I still feel unprepared. Proteins and vitamins and calcium, where do I start?

Also, since the last time I tried getting approved I have gotten married. Before I didn't give much thought to what could happen to me but now I worry for him; not only about what he will think when I start losing the weight but what if something should happen to me? I look at him and think how can this wonderful man who loved me at my heaviest love me when I look like a shar-pei or  who will take care of him should I pass?
 

Anyhow, I don't mean this to be so heavy, this looming surgery has me thinking of my own mortality.