Warning!! I can not spell, If you are easily offended by my butchering of the english language please do not continue. This just about sums up my last 7 years...
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I am a 27 year old married mother of two. I have wanted this surgery for the past few years but have only recently gotten insurance. I am surprised to see how hard it is to get all my medical records together. Its literally taken months to get just a few dr.'s to fax my charts. I try not to bug lea but I keep calling in amazement that they hadnt recieved anything. they finally have psych. eval and enough records to submit my info to insurance, so here I sit. I will give it a few days and then call bc/bs and make sure they have all they need. Its hard to wait, but I guess I should do like I tell my kids and use some of the patients god gave me. I read profiles on here so much that they all start to sound the same, but my major obstical isnt the approval its my co pay. I have a $200.00 deductable and the lea says my portian is 4 something so 600.oo doesnt sound like much but they also chard a thousand doller "program fee". this is where they get me. Im still confused by it since my insurance company told me that by contract the surgeon cant charge me for anything they dont at least submitt to insurance, but the patient co-ordinator (lea)says there is no code for it oh well. Its just so hard to get this kind of money together. after rent, car note and other bills we make out about even oh well if its meant to be I'll find the money somewhere.
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I have switched insurance frome blue cross blue shield, to beechstreet. First slap was that my surgeon doesnt take it. 2nd I have an exclusion that reads....
EXCLUSION...
Charges for treatment of obesity; weight control; diet control, including but not limited to, charges for vitamins, diet supliments, recreational therapy, educational therapy, non-medical treatment, self-care or self-help training, or enrollment in a health, athletic or similar club.
I was a bit disapointed at first but then I noticed a few holes... It says obesity, does not mention super-morbidly obese, which is where I am. Also it clearly says non- medical. Surgery sounds medical to me. So I called the ph.# off my card and they tell me that they are a third party administrator. They explain that My home office actually makes the final decision. I call home office, I pointed out my situation and was told I would have a call back. The next day I get a call at work, and they agreed that if I could prove medical mecessity they would cover it. I swear I could hear anjels sing. I was so anxiouse to get the ball rolling again that I grabed a phone book and tried to look up surgeons that took my insurance. all the drs are listed together. Out of desperation, I called one of the ads for a plastic surgeon and asked if they knew of anyone. They gave me 3 diff #s the first to had L-O-N-G wait lists just to get a consult, but The third is a new dr to the area and I was able to get in to see him. It just hapends that the next night they were having an orientation. I went and really likes the dr, He is open and honest I like that. I am a bit concernd about his discharge, He says he generally sends us home in 24 hours!!!! sounds crazzy. I have had 2 c-sections and needed my pain pump!! I am a big baby when it comes to pain. I know he will send drugs home with me, but what about complications? I asked his patient co-ordinator, and she says we can see about staying longer. I am going to ask for 72 hours. I really think Ill feel beter. I am hoping to have my surgery in january. Thats just a few months away. I might be getting ahead of myself, since we havnt even submitted to my new insurance yet but I have a good feeling. I believe that with my medical history i should have no trouble getting aproved.
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11/09/2004
I am currently trying to get my personal letter and diet history together. I found a buddy on the messageboard last night and am gratefull for her willingness to help. I will update after my apt on the 24th.
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11/24/2004
I met with dr. green. Kinda wierd, He looks a lot like my husband. lol he was verry nice. I explained that I already had my psych eval done, but my trouble was with my pcp. He gave me my records but wont give me letter of necesity. Hes a punk anyway. needs to retire. I told dr. green that I have done a-lot of research and I have chosen the lap-band. He and his assistant looked disapointed. They explained that the rny is the gold standard, and the band may not be the right choice If I dont make the right food choices. Now hes got me wondering whats right for me. I paid my portion. Got an info booklet and headed home. They needed to wait on my records from my old sergeon, and schedule me for my chardioligest apointment. I needed to get a leter of necesity, I will try my obgyn. Dr. Ondrizek delivered my youngest son. He rocks!!
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11/29/2004
I have left message for dr. O they said it will be an 18 doller fee but theyll do it. I swear drs make more in misc fees than they do anything else. So far everything is falling into place and I should have my sergery in february, perfect timming for my tax return to help with misc. costs.
have chosen the band for a few reasons.
#1. Lower complications, My kids need a mom even if she is fat, Plus If something happens whose going to remind hubby to feed the gerbils?
#2. I totoally get that thin feels beter than fat tastes, but i would not like to spend the rest of my life unable to eat certain things. Im having surgery to be normal. It is normal to have a bite, of cake at your sons b-day party. (as oposed to now, Waiting till its over and eating a platefull before bed... not normal) Plus i cant imagine everytime going to family house having to ask whats in everything. My hubby has a big family, we get together often, just this weekend ( maried 6.5 yrs) noticed his mom puts sugar in pees. cant tast it. That could be bad.
#3. My hubby wants one more little angel, Im not sure but if i do, but i dont want to worry about nutrition issues if i do. The band i understand is more maternity friendly.
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12/02/2004
AAHHH. Today was a rough day. I had jury dutty the last 2 days so im a bit behind at work. Plus Im emotionally drained. The case was hard to hear. I cant imagine ever hurting a child. We are here to protect them. Ok so I get to work and find a leter for me from home office. At the first of the year My rates for insurance goes up. My 2004 Max out of pocket is 950.00 plus a 250.00 deductable. total 1200. In 2005 it goes up to a 5k out of pocket plus 500 deductable, Youve got to be kidding me!! Thats a huge increase. Of course I freak out!! I call my sergeon and talk to brandy. She works miracles. She is dr greens assistant. I tell her that for sure I want the band and I explain the insurance info. She got on the ball. She called my last dr and got the rest of the forms they needed. She called insurance and said it sounds like I may get it this year!! she is a blessing. she alsp reasured me that my co-pay of 20% wouldnt be anywhere near 5k anyway. With the band it would only be like 1300. Not a ton more, but when you concider thats just for the dr.. we still need to consider the hospital fees anisticia etc. I called home office to make sure my vacation and sick time were in order. Ive got a totoal of 65 hrs. I'm hoping with the band 10 days will be enough time off. I called insurance they said they have 15 days to reply. cuts it close to my target date that im hoping for. the 27 or 28.
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12/05/2004
Nothing new to update. I will call brandy tomorow to see if she has heard anything. Today is a perfect example of why I want to be banded. My kids spent the night with my mother in law, and I thought it would be kind of naughty If I skiped church. So I rented a carpet shampooer. I got as far as cleaning my kitchen. but didnt mop. Did laundry, but didnt fold it, and got about halfway through cleaning My kids room. I mooved the furniture around in the living room and did the carpet. My back hurts really bad. Im actually getting shooting pains across it when I move funny. I look forward to being able to clean my whole apt in one day. Its just a simple 2bed 2 bath. Not a mantion Im too sore and tired to cook for my family now, and Plan on an early bed. I want to do my kids room tomorow. Im due at work @2 and need to turn the shampooer in. Well Hopefully I'll have good news soon
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12/12/04
My insurance denied me. Those dumbuts say it was pre-existing. DUH!! aw well they say I'll be eligible in march. so I am just going to try a new aproach. I will still see the nutritionist, my sergeon is helping me find a dr that is not a punk!! and on payday my wonderfull husband is joining a gym with me!! So I will try my best to get healthy, and re-aply in march.
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01/15/05
Joining a gym took a bit longer than expected. The holidays allways make things crazzy at work. I work in a shoe store at the mall so you can imagine what december is like. Then last week my car broke down. But I was able to find a new dr, and he put me on a diet pill. My apointment with him was on the 6th, and as of today Ive gone from 251 to 238. I can't see a diff but its still pretty cool!! I did join fitness for her yesterday. My husband changed his mind about joining so I chose an all woman gym, for the comfort level. Dont think I'd want to sit in a hot tub with a bunch of hairy guys. Im more cumfy in my swim suit in front of women anyhow. Im tryig to get this top layer off while we wait for march to re-aply to insurance.
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3/27/05
Im am getting frustrated.
At the end of feb, I called insurance and made sure i had all of my bases covered, they sais that yes my surgery is covered if medically nec. They said that my pre-existing is no longer an issue and that their records show that last year i was found med nec. so i should have no trouble. ok. So I called home office and made sure that nothing has changed since last year. everything is the same and I would be covered if found necissary. I have been on a med supervised diet since early jan, (although not required) so i sent in my new records and re submitted. I called the insurance and they said they had everything, but that it could be a few days. A few days later they sais that yes i was found med necisary, and that they just need a supervisor to look over things, but my aproval should be in the mail in a day or two. They said it would be no prob for me to schedule early april. The next day my surgeons office tells me they got my deniel in the mail.?? Apearently dated before I spoke to them... the day before. Now they say its not covered and never was coverd, but apoligized for the mis understanding. What? No!! I was mad they remember telling me it was covered but say that my plan was mis-read. I asked them to read me the exclusion. they tell me a supervisor has to do thast and they wont be in till monday. theyr taking a long weekend for easter. its wednsday!! dont they know my datew is 2 weeks away? pre op testing 1 week away!! I call home office and again they say that its the same plan as last year, and as far as they know theyve never had anyone request this type of surgery. I was told that they havnt updated the policy since the last one expired at the end of last year. So I asked if ive had 90$ taken out of easch check for nothing. I get a run around about how they have a meeting to re-negotiate the policy in a few weeks. Im so upset. She said that she would get back with me in a few days. being it was wed @830 am, I called her back on fri afternoon. Surprise shes got a 3 day weekend. So here I sit. No policy... wouldnt no policy mean non exclusion? Arg I guess since today is easter I'll just sit and be thankfull for what I do have. A Loving husband and two sweet children. And truely thats all I really need. (Although I would like to say "atleast I have my health" lol)
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05/20/05
I guess its apearant that I have all but given up. My PREVIOUSE< employer emotionaly sodimised me!! I of course got frustrated when i was denied, even though it was covered and I was med necisary. They told me that my only option was to get a layer. I told them that they knew that I could not afford a lawyer on what they paid me. I went back and forth between home office and my insurance people. at the end of march I gave up. that was about the time my pcp told me to take a few months off the adipex, said my blood pressure was rising.....YA THINK!!! Im no DR. but yea!! So I just put my tail between my legs and went into my dog house. But My depresion only lasted a little while. I was working 60 hrs a week and didnt have time for a pity party. Here is when it gets sticky. My district manager came to me in mid april, and told me that my sister in law and I both could not work there. I knew where she was going with it, they had known since june that we were related, but wait til I cause a stink about my surgery to terminate me. Im O.K with that. So now I sit home. I have been looking for work, tanning and going to the gym. I'm A horable house wife. I stink at cleaning my house. Well not really at the cleaning. I guess I just stink at the pep talk that gets my obese but up and motivated to clean. My poor husband. I used to blame my poor housekeeping on being tirred from work, but now I know its plain lazyness.
SO here we are. I have not given up, but I have put my surgery on the back burner. I am continuing to work out and eat right. I have lost about 35 lbs. but havnt lost anything in 2 months.
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6/6/5
Not much to update, but thought I would anyway's. I went to my dr. and got another prescription of my Adipex. I feel like I'm loosing but since I'm taking classes at the local college I havnt been to the gym to weigh myself. I guess next time I'm at WAllY WORLD I should pick up a scale. I'm kind of afraid that I would get overly crazzy about it . Its wierd how I go up and down about 5 lbs. or so. I am going through a fase were I'm feeling a bit lost in the world. I have discovered that I'm not a great housewife. So I get this great idea to go to school. I have been going to the comunity college off and on since I mooved here 3 yrs ago. I only have 18 credits. Its kindoff discouraging, Its a big circle. I didnt go to school before I had kids. Now that Im as close to a grown up as I ever will be, Im realizing that I cant really find the job I want without school. Its hard, I cant really afford to just not work for a few years and just go to school. So the logical thing to do would go to school part time. The problem is I have been working retail recently, and as a retail manager we must work 48 hrs a week. Often we work more. I guess that I could just be a sales associate, but whats the point of paying as much for daycare as I make? MMMMMMMM Its frustrating. I am trying to think of ways to make this work. For the past few years I have wanted to Be a resource manager. I am just going to pray for a solution.
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06/26/2005
Not much to report. I am taking some summer courses at the local college. Still have not started working. I am focusing on my kids and going to school till fall. once brandons in school i should be able to afford to put aiden in a kinder-care type program.It is nice to hang out with my little guys. We swim most everyday. FYI, This is a picture of the class Im supposed to squeeze my big but into.
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07/05/2005
My darling husband took me camping for our anniversary!!! I love him so much!! We had a blast. Took me to joe pool lake. The water was nasty. I wouldnt let the kids get in it. It stunk... Nasty. This is Aiden and I on the 4th of jully.
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08/03/2005
I started a job a few weeks back. Its through a temp agency, but it is a fun job. I am still no where close to surgery. I take my adipex, and was going to the gym till I started working. I work from 6am to 3pm. but so far I have been staying till about 5 or 6 everyday. I'm also still taking night courses @ the college. Last weekend We went to San Antonio to watch my brother in law graduate boot camp. He's officially in the airforce. I am proud of him, but Im also selfish. I feelbad for writing this, I could never say it outloud by why Aaron? I just wish he didnt join while were at war. I know it was his choice, but I worry about him.
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09-14-05
This will be short, just a quick update. I try to update monthly, but it gets depressing when theres no progress towards surgery. I did get a new Job @ DSW. I loved my other job, but since it was temp and offered no benifits this seemed more logical. The good news is that My benifits will start in only 60days. Im used to 90 days. They have anthem blue cross blue sheild. I pray that they cover my surgery. I have been gaining weight lately. about 10 pounds since my lowest weight. but to be fair tomyself I was only that weight for one day. (the day we got home from camping) So Ill say 8 pounds. I gained 8 pounds sitting on my bottom this summer. My new job is ok. Im back to retail. Im thrilled about that as you can imagine. I am taking 3 classes this fall. One is online, and 2 are ITV. I just hope I dont get lazy and blow it.
Note to self... do not update profile when your having a bad day, I think it shows through.
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10 9,2005
Im in a better mood that the last post. I just feel so frustrated that I am not in controll of anything in my life. I wake up with the best intentions and then before you know it im eating crap. I did loose the weight id gained last month, I even fit into my wedding dress again, Its a size 16. That made me feel pretty good but not for long. Im only like four foot nine. My bmi is still 47. My pants are all 18s and some even still 22s. I think the dress thing is a fluke. Im just thrilled that it zipped!! I enrolled in my husbands insurance. He has united health care. It is pretty expensive, but it looks like they cover my surgery. I called before I enrolled, and they said yes. Its covered for anyone with a bmi of over 40 or over 35 with comorbidities. Sounds like I should qualify but i have thought that before. I try not to get my hopes up too high. Insurance can be sooo confusing. we had 4 different plans to choose from. they seemed the same, but all the talk about deductables, co pays exclusions. ARG!! Its cool though. I found phone numbers in fine print and called. I narrowed it down to uhc80 or 90. I chose the 80 mostly becausde it costs less. It was still prety pricey. the max out of pocket was only 500 dollers lesss. from 4k to 3.5k but i would be paying about 2 hundred dollers more a month so that didnt add up to me. they both covered surgey so that was all that mattered no sence in paying more than neccisary. My other choices were both hmo's I heard lots of horrer stores about them.
I am in big trouble as far as school goes. Im working this job that Im not really into. when in off im so tirred and in such a grumpy mood, that I just dont study. I feel bad but I want to quit. I want to focus on school and my kids. I get to that place thats called a job and get pissed at the world. I had a job I loved and had to quit. I really thought I could convince myself that I could love my new job. Instead I think I hate it more and more each day. I know hates a strong word but DANGE!! I have been in retail management for many years. I have experience, but the way this new store is ran is crazy, No structure. The kick is that im the one whos not getting it!!! I of course am not going into detail but lets just agree that this job is not going to work for me. So here I am back at the drawing board. I will try to update more often.
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January 01, 2006
Wow Another year has came and gone. 2006 sounds so far away!!! but Here it is. I guess thast makes me old!! LOL Today My united healthcare starts. Ofcourse my surgeons office will be closed tomorow, but I think they will submit my papers this week. I keep hearing that UHC is quick so we will see. I have everything planned out better than I have before. I just need to remember that I am on gods time not my own. He must have had a reason to make me wait these few years so here we are.I enrolled in the plan @ work were they take a little $ out of each check, and pay 1500 towards medical bills. I cant remember what its called but its really going to help out when its time to pay. I wont feel it as much. I also have short term disability. They only pay 50% of my pay, but its still better than nothing. I didnt do well at school last semester. It was just too much with a job that makes me want to cry and kids and everything else. I weighed myself last week and im at 225. Not to bad. My lowest was 216. But like I said before that was after camping. I was carefull to not bring soda. I basicly only ate fruit and put bb-q sauce in foil with chicken for supper. it was yummy. I need to loose at least 100 pounds but Im still thrilled that I havnt gained anything. Lat year on new years I weighed nearly 260. I lost a bunch right at first, but it slowed after that. I would do better if I could drop the soda. but I just love it soo much!! lol I will try to update more often this year, lol. because this is the year I will be banded. If insurance refuses to help, I will cut myself and use one of those rings from the top of 6-packs of sode. I will do it myself. I will be like the martha stewart of WLS, lol. So stay tuned I may end up on the news yet, lol.
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01-05-06
I was aproved!! I will post more soon. tonight im tired and a bit numb. I've got the its too good to be true feeling. Thanks to everyone for the well wishes!! One more thing, after long consideration, the DR. and I agree that I am a better canidate for the RNY. So I will not be banded after all.
Here are pics from my sleep study, Im such a hottie, I should be a model.
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These Are My little guys.
Arnt they cute!!
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01/29/2006
Im a looser!! Im only 3 days out but Its felt like forever!! I was told my surgery was scheduled for 12 noon and to be there 2 hours early. Likr the good patient I am, I was there at 945. I sat around forever. first they said dr green was running an hour late. after hanging around in a paper gown all day they took me down to holding at about 5. they said all they had to do was get my iv going and Ill be in. Problem was My veins are tiny!! It didnt help that I hadn't ate or drank anything. I had to have 3 nurses and then finally a doctor get my line started. It was painfull. they used a gell that helped my veins pop up. they said they usually use it on heart patients wil low blood pressure. It gave me an awful headach but it worked and in i went at 6 pm. It was after 9 before I went to recovery. Apearantly one of my surgeons assistants left a tube in me, and the doctor didnt notice till the stapler jammed. If any of dr greens patients read this, know that dr green is a verry experienced and skilled surgeon. He noticed before any complications could arise. He just took a few more minutes and fixed it up and off to recovery I went.
THE PAIN!!!! It was so intense. My throught was so dry. My tummy was on fire. I wanted more medication but since I kept forgetting to breath I was at my max level. Pure agony. I got to my room at about 1030. I was pretty hurt that my husband wasnt able to be there for me, but his family was having a medical emergency. I understand The first night was tough, not an hour went by literally without someone busting in to take my blood pressure, prick my finger or take my tempreture. Im not sure why the same person couldnt do all of this but I guess its how it works. The next morning they took me down to do that swallow test. It sucked. they took me off the morfine that morning but I was to nausouse to swallow my liquid medication. that whole day was awfull. I did get to go home around 6pm. It was nice to get in to my own comfy bed. My liqud codiene is nice. not as strong as the stuff at the hospital. doesnt make me sick. I forgot to mention that the first day, i drank 1.5 ounces of water, .5 ounces of apple juice . the second day io had maybe 6 ounces of water and 2 popcycles. (sf of course) today is the third day and i found something that I love. yesterday i tried the fat free low sodium chicken broth and with one sip i know it was nasty. today I made the instant ramen, and just strained out the juice. mmm. Its warm ind nice. Prolly not the healthiest but it works. Its nice to have something warm in my tummy. I also tried sf jello but it tastes funy, prolly cuz I used tap water. Ive had a popcycle and about 5 ounces of water. Im taking much less codien today and feel like Im well on my way to recovery. I will be in touch
This is my meal for the first week or so. http://photobucket.com" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v664/Elsabell/med.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket">
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feb 11, 2006
Im a little more than 2 weeks out. Im doing well. I found out by accident I dont dump. I was pretty disapointed. I really needed the negative reinforcement. I am still motivated, I will not let myself fail, but it is a bit discouraging. I lost a bunch right at first but these past few days the scale hasnt moved. I have gone from 235 down to 210. So I guess I cant complain to much. lol THe Dr said I could eat food as tolerated. So far I havnt had any trouble. I have more energy since I can eat now. But I still dont think Im getting enough protien, Every kind I taste gags me. So im still drinking the pria shakes.
I am looking for yet another job. Since moving to texas, I just dont feel at home. In washington I felt comfortable. I never had any trouble with my jobs. Since moving to texas I just havn't found my nitch. I know it sounds crazzy, but I just feel like Im looking for something. I love my kids to death. My husband and I have been getting along great lately. I am not at all unhappy with my family, or personal relationships. Just texas. I hate everything about it. Whats with the apts. here. No playground? No indoor pool? I dont even let my kids play outside. Except for My last summer job, everybody I have worked with in this state have womped. ( yes I still watch recess. )
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02-15-06
Love is in the air. I was still a bit down. The surgery has been harder than I thought. I am dealing with the low energy levels and random muscle aches. My lower back has given me the most grief. and my calf charlie horses when I walk. My darling husband bought me a new razor. I shaved for the first time since surgery. Its the little things that make me feel closer to normal. Anyone that meets my hubby will tell you hes a but-head. I agree 99% of the time. He is a real sweet heart though. After my shower he took off my toe polish and painted them for me. It was the kind of thing he used to do when we first met, in 1998. The scale is still not moving but I read someone on the message board post, that that just means Im closer to the end of my platoe. It will move soon. Im still at 210.
http://photobucket.com" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v664/Elsabell/mebear.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"> http://photobucket.com" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v664/Elsabell/mycoollook.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"> http://photobucket.com" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v664/Elsabell/justwokeup.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by Photobucket"> just a few pics of my progress so far. compared to the pre op test pics Im starting to see improvement.
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2-28-06
My one month has came and gone. I like to think the first month is the hardest. It was draining, emotionally and physically. I have been loosing again. I am now at 198. I mostly see it in my face and waist. I notice my 22's are really loose. I keep having to pull em up as I walk, thats cool. Sometimes my husband can be the food Nazi. I get so frustrated at the time, but the truth is, Im glad he takes care of me. He is right, I dont need to see how my body reacts to chips. I just get so tirred of the same ol junk. But as they say, thin feels better than fat tastes. I can start doing more excersizing now. I will start my arm weights and sit ups tonight. I notice my tummy hangs more now than over the summer when I weighed more, but worked out. Also all my weight is in my but. Lucky me buts are in. If this were the 80's Id be in real trouble. This cartoon sums up my thoughts http://www.illwillpress.com/vault.html click on jiggly but.
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3/24/06
Almost 2 months out, and Ive got to tell you I'm so tirred of these stalls. My scale weighs 6 pounds less than my surgeons office. My official pre-op weight was 232, a few days ago I went for my 8 week check up and weigh 202. In 8 weeks I've lost 30 pounds. I did the math and its just under 4 pounds a week. I keep thinking Im not loosing enough, but I dont know how much I thought I would loose. I didnt gain it overnight and Im not going to loose it that fast iether. I have been in a stall for a few weeks, infact I gained 2 pounds. But I think its over, the past few days its goen down so I will keep you updated. I have made arrangements to use the gym at the complex accross the street. I start on monday so Im pretty excited. I dont have a goal weight, Is that weird? I dont know how much Is realistic. We shall see.
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06/06/06
Weird date hu? I Havnt updated in a while but here I am. Im a little over 4 months out and doing OK. I weight 180 ish depending on my scales mood. Like that? I blame my fluctuations in weight on my scale. lol Not the popcorn I ate. lol I guess whatever gets me through the night. lol. Im kind of in a silly mood. I of course was hoping to have lost more by this point. Im right about 50 pounds. I wanted that by 3 months not at 4+. Its cool though. Im halfway to where I think I should be. I havnt set an actuall goal. They depress me. I do hope to loose another 15 pounds by my birthday. Its the end of august. Ill be 30 can you believe it? Wow. I remember when that was my pants size, but now my age... EEK. Other than that things are going well. no major complications other than my hair falling out. In tuckloads people. It started about a week ago and its crazzy. All of the sudden handfulls at a time. Im scared to brush it. Aw well what do you do... I guess no news is good news. I did ad pictures of my size 14s on my www. just to lazy to put them here. lol
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June 29, 2006
I am officially five months out. Not much lost this month. My scale says 175ish. Sometimes as low as 170. I try not weigh daily but I cant help it. I think today its 175 because my lady friend is trying to visit. Not a big fan of her but I guess in this stage of the game its better than the alternative. Yikes could you imagine me with a third child??? Im not emotionally stable enough for the ones I have. lol So not much has changed. still working retail. Its funny I try not to overanalize my food intake. I had this sergery to be normal not to be on a diet the rest of my life. Why doesnt everyone else see it that way. I swear Everyone around me try and be my food police. Dont get me wrong. If I sit down in front of a slice of cake feel free to say something but If I pull out a roast beef sandwich keep to yourself. The meet and cheese are protien, the miracle whip is light. Mustard is fine the letuce and cucumber are vegies. So Im eating bread"WOOP WOOP" thats the food police coming to get me to haul me away. I've ate some chetoes. I had a couple not a bagfull. I am aware that its a bad choice. Im not doing it every week but yes last week I was home alone. no protien bars or anything for me to snack on and yes I had a few. Clearly to get to a point that I needed this surgery I #1 make poor food choices and #2 have a lack of willpower. I made a choice to live a healthier life. I'm doing great. I may slip up from time to time. Im sorry but I'm still human. I just feel that everyone around me feel they have the right to watch everything I eat. Im still all growed up. In exception to my husband who is paying for my surgery people need to mind their business. It just kills me that everyone around me knows someone who had it and try to tell me what I'm doing wrong. First off my doctor is cool with me. I asked my nutritionist if there was anything I need to cut out and she said everything is fine in moderation. For example my doctor said soda is fine. sugar free calorie free as long as it doesnt interfere with my water intake. a girl stoped by my store who had the surgery many years ago, (and has gained quite a bit back) was horified that I had a pepsi one. I explained that my dr was cool with it her responce was that he must not have done as much research as the doctors in luisianna did. that soda expands your tummy. blah blah blah. seriouly im up to here with everyones opinions. Just because I was open about my surgery does not give everyone the right to judge me and my food choices. at the end of the day, If I stay under 1000 calories, get my 70 grams of protien in, 64 ounces of water, and get my excersize in thats what Im worried about. Dont forget my vitamins. Ive had many meals of rotiserie chicken with only cucumber as a side. No one gives cudoes for those meals but dange throw a soda in the next day or a few chetoes and the world stops to watch me. I didnt realize my life was so interesting.
I'm not going crazzy but dang people, get off me. This is what happens when PMS comes to town. Keep your children back people. Ive been known to snap. lol.
These last five months have gone by quickly. I checked the timeline thing and it looks like in on track to "eventually" hit my secret goal of 140. I gues its not a secret if I post it for everyone to see. I might be shooting cautiously. even at 140 I'd be considered obese. It says I need to be 135 to be considered overweight. Dang!! Guess its because I'm only 4ft 9in. Im a short one. But the truth is Im not planning on any playboy covers, I just want to close the lock on the rolercoasters at sixflags. Simple stuff. Fit in the seat at my sons school programs. Not be afraid of turnstyles. Im there. I can live a healthy life at my current weight. At this point my loosing is purely vanity and I'm ok with that. lol
I will try to update more often.
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7/13/06
Well Here I am again. My scale is shoeing right about 169 give or take. Its crazzy how much it fluctuates. Anyhhoos Life is pretty steady these days. Not much going on wich is a good thing. Will and I had our 8 year anniversary on the third. we went to the innerspace caverns in Austin it was fun. We of course took the kids but we all had a blast. I do hope that we can do something in the future with just the two of us.
Lately I have had this film in my mouth. Its gross. I brush and brush but feel like there is fur on my tounge. Ive heard it could be everything from too much protien... to katosis. I dont think im in katosis since my scale is mooving so slow. I guess We will see. Im getting plenty of water and protien in but not as much excersize as I should. I know it sounds like an excuse but between work and my kids Im exausted. I work retail so Im moving a lot, pluss I move heavy boxes and push racks of clothes. Its harder than it sounds. IOts funny how many people walk through a store and never think twice about how the jeans end up accross the top of the store. mmm I still hope to get down to 160 by my birthday in the end of August.
Us in Austin
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