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Hi All,

I can't believe it has been 8 months since I had my RNY!  I have lost 97 pounds in all, I weighed in this morning at 171.  I had been stuck at 174 for over 2 months and I was really okay with it.  Now that I am losing again I couldn't be happier.  I really want to get to 160 and I think it is possible.  I can now wear a size medium shirt and even bought 2 pairs of SIZE 8 JEANS at Coldwater Creek the other day.  I had bought 12's because that is the size I thought I was and I put them on and they were really big.  I took them back and tried on a 10 and the saleslady said those are too big let me get you an 8.  I literally almost fell on the floor.  My 5 year old was with me and we did a happy dance around the dressing room. 

I feel really good, my energy is up, I can eat almost anything in small quantities.  I struggle with getting my water and vitamins still but I do get them in.  My hair started falling out at around the 3 month mark and I lost A LOT of it.  It continued to fall out until about a month ago, it is a good thing I started with a lot of hair.  As I have said in the past, almost every aspect of my life has improved with surgery.  I had one of the best summers ever this past year which included attending my 20 year high school reunion.  We had a blast and I felt so good about myself.  I have noticed some changes in a few of my relationships but nothing drastic enough to be a problem.  I started with a really supportive group which I think is so important.  My husband cannot believe the transformation in me and he is loving every minute of it.  We still have our normal ups and downs like any other couple but our relationship has improved dramatically.  My kids are benefiting from a happier, healthier mom who has more energy & self confidence to do things with them - that is the best part for me!!

A major wow moment for me was the other day when I was shopping in Target with a co-worker who I have seen every day for the last 12 years.  I was done with my shopping and waiting for her at the registers.  She walked right by me and then did a double take and said "you know, there are days when I just don't recognize you!"  

I didn't have any major health issues going in to surgery aside from high cholesterol and major indigestion from a large hiatal hernia I have.  Both issues have been resolved.  Also no more aches and pains in my knees and back.  It is a struggle for me to not mindlessly eat or to eat when I am stressed but I am aware of it and working on it.  I had no complications from surgery and I hardly ever get sick anymore from eating the wrong things or eating a bite or two too much. 

I would do this all over again in a heartbeat and I wish everyone out there much success and happiness in their journey.  I would not have come this far without the support of this site and the wonderful friends I have met along the way.  Thank you!!

Take care,
Debbie

I am on such a high this morning!!  I said I would be happy to get in a 14 and now they are all too big.  I can't believe it.  Dare I dream that I'll be a size 10 and medium shirt before my 20 year reunion at the end of July??  That would be amazing. 

Just wanted to share that WOW moment with all of you because frankly no one else fully understands just how amazing that feels.

Love and thanks!
Debbie

Good Morning!

My BMI is now 29.6!  I would no longer qualify for WLS - Whoo Hoo!!!  I never thought I would come this far in just under 5 months.  I am now wearing a size 14 bottom and regular large top.  It is so surreal at times.  My husband looked at me this morning and shook his head and I said "what", he said are those new pants?  I said yes, why do they look bad, he said no, you look amazing.  I am sort of torn by his reaction to me lately.  I love the attention and feel so happy with our relationship.  But a little nagging thought in the back of my mind is "shouldn't he have felt this way about me all along?"  I usually answer that by telling myself that I hated the way I looked and felt so why shouldn't he feel the same.  But is that the right way to think?  I just don't know.  I really just want to enjoy what we have now and not second guess him or myself.  He has always been there for me and is truly the person who grounds me in life and that I know I can and always could depend on.  There has just been a shift in our relationship and I feel more secure and confident than I ever have and I think he's a little insecure. I think I will post on the main board because I can't be the only one out there who has gone through this. 

Overall I feel great and I am truly loving life for the first time in YEARS!  For me, WLS was the answer to the major problem in my life I could not fix on my own.  I wish all of you out there success and would like to thank the people who get me through every day.

Love & thanks,
Debbie

Just a quickie to say that today is 4 months out for me.  77 pounds down and exactly 1 pound away from my "weigh the same as I did on my wedding day" goal of (190)  Whooo hoooo!!!!

I feel great for the most part.

I am extremely ashamed to say that I have been very lazy in taking my vitamins before now.  Now I carry a bag of them everywhere I go to make sure I get them in every day.  If not for this website I would continue to be lazy.  But in reading profiles and boards I have come to realize that even if I feel great today, I could get seriously sick down the road if I am not following the rules.  Confession over.

Have a great day all!
Debbie

Hi All!

This weekend was full of WOW moments for me.  We were going on no sleep by the time Friday came because our 2 year old was really sick all week.  It had also rained all week and the sun was finally shining on Friday.  The old me would have gone straight home, into p.j.'s and vegged out on the couch.  At the end of the day I had a burst of energy (that happens a lot to me now post WLS) and we decided to take the kids to a local carnival - we had a blast!!  I went on all the rides with my 5 year old and my husband took took our little one, this was almost always the other way around.  We did the ferris wheel and the fun house and the big slide and I loved every second of it.  It truly just felt good to be alive and be with my husband and kids.  Saturday, we got up and got ready for my sons T-Ball game and I socialized with the other Moms that I did not know.  That may sound normal to some but for me I always stayed in the back round and waited to be approached, I always felt so insecure about my weight.  Again, I left the field feeling so good.  Then on to Mother's Day, my husband made a wonderful brunch for both of our families and I enjoyed being with everyone so much and could have cared less about the food.  Holidays have taken on a new meaning for me, I just feel so much joy these days.  After brunch I went shopping with my sister and came home with 3 size 14 bottoms and a size large top, this is down from a 22 bottom and 2x-3x top, it is like a miracle to me!! 

I am so grateful to be able to have had WLS and this new lease on life.  I am going to do everything in my power to enjoy it.  To be free from the depression I felt for so long is a gift.  I am not saying that losing weight is the only way, I wish I could have felt this good at any weight, but for me that is not the case.  I can only imagine how good I feel when I have reached my goal.

Thanks as always to everyone on this site who have given me so much inspiration even if you don't know me, you have been there for me!!

Be well,
Debbie

P.S.  76 down, 32 to go to hit goal!!!! 

I made it to ONDERLAND!!  I am so happy, it seems like I can do anything now!  This past Monday morning the scale read 199.5, and while I was happy with that number I was afraid to claim it.  Then the scale got stuck there for the past 4 days and this morning it read 198.5 so I figured I could finally join the onderland club.  I have not been this low since the year 2000 when I got married.  I have gone from a 2X/3X, 22-24 to a very comfortable 16 misses!  There is no longer a W after my size!!  Also, today marked 70 pounds since I started the 2 week liquid diet on 12/29.  40 pounds to go to reach goal and it is okay with me if it comes off slower now because I am comfortable in my own skin again - what a wonderful feeling!

I just wanted to share my experience and say that EVERY person on this website whether or not they know it has been an inspiration to me and for this I am grateful.

Have a wonderful weekend!  I am looking forward to a sunny warm weekend in New Jersey to run and play with my family!

Be well,
Debbie

Hello All!

Well yesterday was 3 months out for me.  The scale read 203.5 - I am getting so close to onderland, I can't believe it, it has been about 9 years since the scale was under 200.  Easter went really well.  It was so nice for me that the focus was not on food for the first time in a long time.  I focused on my kids, my family and helping my mom in the kitchen.  Not one piece of candy or food that I shouldn't be eating passed my lips and I didn't even want it.  Not like holidays in the past when I was on a diet and resisted temptation and was cranky and then broke down and gorged on food later when everyone was sleeping.  I guess what I am trying to say is that this new "tool" of mine has made all the difference in my life.  For this I will be forever grateful. 

I went for my 3 month follow up on Friday, all my levels looked good except for my b12.  I am not as dedicated as I need to be with taking my vitamins and this has to change now.  Dr. Sadik seemed pleased with my progress.  I told him I was only averaging about 500 calories a day, he seemed to be fine with that number.  It still sounds low to me.  The biggest struggle I have now is not wanting to eat at all or starting to eat something I think I want and losing interest 3 bites in.   Food seems to have lost all meaning to me and for someone who used to be preoccupied with food 24/7 - it is a very strange sensation.
Should I just be grateful or worried?  I am really not sure.  Is this a phase like so many others I have been through in the last 3 months.  Right after surgery, I thought what did I do to myself, I cried and then it passed.  Then I struggled with head hunger and resentment over what I could not eat and then it passed.  I struggled with a stall and worried I would be someone this surgery did not work for and that passed too.  If anyone out there can offer and experience or input, I would appreciate it very much.  Maybe I'll post on the main board as well.

All and all I am doing great.  ALL areas of my life have improved dramatically over the past 3 months.  I can't wait to see what the next 3 months brings.

I hope you are all feeling good.

Debbie

Hi All,

I hope everyone out there is enjoying the beginning of Spring - I know I am.  It is cold in Jersey but just the anticipation of the warm weather puts me in a good mood.  This is a far cry from how I felt about Spring and Summer last year.  I dreaded them because it meant short sleeves, shorts, bathing suits and trips to lakes, beaches and BBQ's.   I could hide behind my clothes in the Fall and Winter 

Today is my 38th birthday, not a milestone birthday or anything but it sure feels like it!!  I haven't felt this good in years.  The strangest thing about how good I feel now is that I have been at this weight (214) before and have felt absolutely horrible about myself.  I cannot explain the difference this time.  I think it is due in part by the fact that I am not plagued by the thought of when I will start my next diet and by the fact that the scale is moving downward at a very nice pace for me.  My depression and self loathing came from my failures and constant thoughts of diets.  This is no longer the case and it is truly like gaining freedom.  My husband bought me a bike for my birthday and I cannot wait to get out there as a family and ride together.  My weight has kept me on the sidelines for long enough and even though I still have a ways to go I am no longer going to hold myself back.  I am just going to get out there and live my life.  For so long I would say to myself "I'll do this when I get to this weight" or "I'm too tired" or "I'll embarrass myself or even worse my husband".  BTW, he has been nothing but supportive and on this journey with me but I know he had strong feelings about my weight prior to surgery.   He was not vocal about them and never made me feel like I was less because of my weight but just knowing his thoughts on me being overweight made me feel depressed.  He always said, it is not the weight that bothers me it is your unhappiness.  I never fully believed him thinking all along that he was ashamed of me when really I was ashamed of myself more than he could ever be.  And the happier I get and the more active I am I can see that he was right all along.    He looked at me the other day and said "you look different" and I couldn't quite grasp what he was saying.  Later he explained that I looked happy and full of life and confidence.  I knew I felt that way on the inside I just didn't know it was showing on the outside.  

As I said just some thoughts on my journey so far.

I hope everyone is doing well and loving life!

Debbie

Hi out there!  I hope everyone is feeling good.

I had set a goal for myself to lose 50 pounds by my birthday,  I reached that goal one week early.  The scale read 218.5 this morning!! I am so happy!  I want to lose another 50, but I am setting another mini goal for the next 10 pounds by my 3 month follow up with Dr. Washington in one month.  NEVER in my life have I been a goal driven person.  I normally just do what I need to do and don't give it too much thought, but that has changed for me.  Hopefully I will get the bike I have been wanting next week and I can start getting out there with my husband and boys, another thing I would never have done in the past.  It just feels so good to be alive these days.  I am coming out of the little cocoon I created for myself.  I am speaking up when I need to, I am taking more care with my appearance, I am a lot more active with my family.  I am so grateful for this new lease on life I have been given. 

I am still having some issues eating.  I am staying in a very small group of safe foods that do not make me sick.  This gets a little boring at times and I am trying to expand.  Yesterday I made a protein pasta salad with low fat mayo, low carb pasta, tuna and eggs.  I have added some carbs back in which I was afraid to do because I am a carb addict, but I am keeping them under 30grams a day for the most part.  If it starts to get out of hand, I will cut them out again.  The carbs go down so easily, why is that?? 

I am 9 weeks out today and any regrets I had in the very beginning are gone.  I cannot wait to see where this journey takes me next.

Take care everyone!
Debbie

Does anyone know how to make the photos on the profile bigger??