Tamara B.
THE BEGINNING.......
I have been thinking of having this surgery for three years now. I know I want it and now I am just about to try for a referral from a primary care Dr who has never seen me before.
10-29-03
I saw my PCP and after listening she has referred me to be tested for sleep apnea, get an echocardiogram (as a follow-up to one down by lawyers re:Phen-Fen), put me on stronger reflux meds, get more blood work, and I am getting an ultrasound of my gall bladder/liver. She wasn't very supportive of the WLS and told me how I would need to try a weight loss program for 6 mos. I told her of my research on this site and how I'd contacted others with my same ins and health care provider and I know some have been able to get the surgery without that. She handed me a paper to give the nurse to send the ins. that said, "BMI 42-Bariatric Surgery". What sort of a referral was this? I am assuming nothing positive will result from this so I am hoping that after my other Dr visits and tests I can send some supportive paperwork in. If anyone has suggestions I love to hear them.
I did attend a weight loss seminar and learned of the Liquid diet that one PA suggested may be good for me. I know I could not do this. I know me.
11-13-03
Well today I got a letter from my Medical Group HMO stating that I was approved for a referral to the surgeon. So I guess Dr's limited description was fine. I know my records were unavailable for a few days so they must have been reviewing them. I had my gall bladder/liver ultrsound and my Echo-cardiogram done. Don't know results of either. I should be seeing my PCP again next week. I called the surgeon to set up my seminar date today. No openings until Late Feb. 04. Long wait.
11-17-03
Today I saw the Pulmonary doc and on Dec 16th I will be tested for sleep apnea. I shared with him my interest in WLS. Oh...I had my height checked for the first time in a LONG time....they said I am only 5'2" and weigh 247 so that brings up my BMI. I was shocked. I thought I was 5'4 1/2"....I used to be!!
11-19-03
Attended my first support group meeting with both pro-op and post-op present. They all are patients of the surgeon I will use if approved, so this was nice to hear from those with some experience. I plan to attend each month. My sister who lives in MO wishes this was available there.
1-06-04
Happy New Year! Well on Dec 26th my pulmunologist called and said I have sleep apnea that will improve with weight loss and at this point he doens't recommend anythign but weight loss. So I informed him of my plans for WLS and he asked me to keep him up to date. (did my at home sleep monitor on 12/16) So nothing else going on a this point. I am waiting for my visit to my surgeon's orientation in Feb. I think I will call soon to see if there are any openings for Jan! The sooner the better right?
2-03-04
Well I can't wait to take my husband to the seminar this month! He is driving me insane. He shows no interest when I try to talk with him about this whole thing. He sees me on the computer and tells me "why don't you do some sit-ups?"!!!! He is Mr Perfectly Fit and has always been able to eat whatever he wants.
He's not being so great right now and it's very upsetting to me.
Hopefully after this seminar, when he's forced to get educated on WLS, he'll come around some. I'm glad I have this site to come to for support. I am not telling others around me about this journey yet. A couple of friends I mentioned it to a few months ago were not for it so I haven't discussed it with them anymore. I hope this month flies by because I'm ready for the next step in my WLS journey!
3-05-04
Well, I took my DH to the seminar with me and he listened intently and when he left he had decided this was my best option at this point but he would never do it to his body. Well, I'm sure his body would never look like mine to begin with so he doens't even have to think of that. Anyway, I know he's in support of me now even if it doesn't quite sound that way. Plus something neat has happened. I finally opened a box of old "love letters" we've saved for nearly 14 yrs. I was told to shred them (by DH) as he was a young man in love and far away form his honey and well...let's jsut say some of them no one else should ever read!! LOL Well, I started to read one then another then another and I couldn't stop. There msut be 150 letters or more plus many audio tapes that we recorded one way conversations to each other on....see he was in the Gulf war and gone for 8 months and we wrote each other nearly daily. Well, these letters gave me somehitng I needed. I am so glad I read them again and I am saving many of them. After 13 yrs of marriage things get so routine!! I needed that boost right about now! Anyway, jsut thgouht I'd share that. And if anyone reading this has an old box of letters, maybe you should get them out and read over them. It was good for me! : )
So since the seminar I have gone to my pre-op support group and met on of my online pals, Christina, and another person at around the same stage. I'm so glad I went. Unfortunately DH had to stay home with the kids this time. I also have everythign required finished other than my psych eval and it is the 16th of this month. I'm getting closer! I am feeling very upbeat about this all now more than before.
I love reading this board, even though I don't often post yet.
Thanks to everyone who answers all the questions and those who sometimes just come on to share for the heck of it.
Till next time...........Oh ya......one more thing....apparently I haven't shrunk!!!! Yes I am once again 5'4"!!! What's up with that? I guess I should have come home that first time I was told I was 5'2" and checked for myself. I am relieved I must say!! LOL
03-17-04
Well, Happy St. Patrick's Day. Just thought I'd update that I had my psych eval this week and all went very well. She jsut talked with me and asked what I knew about before and after the surgery, what I expected, if I had support, if I'd ever been treated or felt I needed to be treated for depression, etc...She said within a week she'd have a letter to my pcp and surgeon. So, today I picked up the last of my lab results and delivered them to the surgeon's office. I was told when the psych eval. arrives I will go into dictation then off to ins. I am feeling good about all this so far. I hope my feelings are right!!
So next week I will call Dr Callery's ofc and see if everything is in place.
I talked with my husband tonight about going on a cruise after I lose my weight. We actually won a cruise many months ago and have till the end of '04 to use it. Right now I have little desire to go. I am thinking of giving it to my Grandma who, near 80 yrs old, is getting married this year!
Take care.
03-25-04
Well, well, well......I thoguht I'd be in dictation now on my way off for ins approval. Seems I've come to a point where it's one thing after another. i thought I had my labs all taken care of and I called Dr Callery's office to see if they had my psych eval....that's all they needed right? WRONG! ANd no they didn't have the psych eval yet nor did they have half the labs. So off I go to get the total chem panel(and a report of the other labs that were done but not printed out)....I get to my pcp and they don't seem to know what they should order. I had told them I needed this when I got the labs done the week or so earlier and thought it had been done. Well, to be sure they get the right things ordered they call Dr Callery's office and had a hard time getting a discription of what exactly they wanted in a "total Chem Panel". SO the nurse in my pcp office proceeds to explain chem panels vary doc to doc and so that the patient isn't given the run around anymore, please list what exactly you need. SO eventually she got a list and I gave MORE blood (after going back home and fasting for 10hrs) I'm told I can pick the results up this afternoon. SO I go in at 4:30....two tests aren't in and won't be till Monday! Well, good news is the psych doc called and offered to fac her eval to Dr Callery now. So I hoe on Mon. I WILL have everythign in their hands in the surgeons office. I am trying my best to be very pleasant with everyone in these medical offices so I won't give them any reason to hold me up. I saw one lady lose it yesterday after she had to wait 30 mins for her doc past her scheduled time. She raised hell!
I still keep telling myself what's meant to happen will happen. I am doing my best to get the surgery but it's not ALL in my control. I haven't been on these boards as much lately. We've been getting our home ready to put on the market. But when I do get on it's so hard to get off! this is a great place to come to.
04-14-04
Well we put our house on the market yesterday and today I got a call from the surgeon's office that I was APPROVED!!!! YES!!!!It is going to happen! I will have this surgery and I WILL put my new tool to good use. Lately my feet have been hurting so much more, my right knee has also been hurting and my hands fall asleep alot...mostly that happens when I am sleeping.
So I feel even though it's scary thinking of how I am permanantly changing my stomach, I keep getting signs that this is what I must do. I have prayed alot over this and jsut kept askign that if I am meant to have the surgery keep those doors open!! : ) I know others who've had those doors closed or barriers placed temporarilly in the way but I have been fortunate and I am so thankful fo rthis opportunity.
I am now going to put up my before pic soon. I was holding out thinking why do that when this may not even happen, but now I feel it's time.
I went to visit a new friend today who had her surgery yesterday and she is doing so great. I walked the halls with ehr and stayed through her meal..2 sips each of jello, broth and juice was ll it took.
I am soooooo ready to do this and it's less than 2 wks away!!
4-29-04
Okay, sold the house fast AND NOW I AM A POST-OP!!!!! I had my surgery on 4-26-04 and weighed 247.8 that day pre-op and weighed 254 post-op when I left.(damn those fluids!) I came home after only one FULL day after surgery, on the 28th. I can remember feeling scared when I woke up after surgery and I remember hearing myself moan and groan and hearing other people call my name, then I must have fallen back asleep, because they did not notify my husband I was out immediately. But when he was able to come in I was over that phase. I stayed in ICU longer than usual just because there were no beds available anywhere else in the hosp. When they finally wheeled me to a room, housekeeping was still cleaning it from the last person! They didn't get all the stuff out of the bathroom. So I am glad I didn't have to stay there long enough to use the shower. Anyway, back to the important stuff....
I have had more pain than I expected....more than after my hysterectomy last year, but I was given more pain control options after that first surgery. This time when I came home I was only given Lortab and it's so nasty tasting to me that I'd rather deal with the pain. Besides the taste I didn't really notice much difference in how it helped the pain. SO ALL I AM TAKING IS TYLENOL! I would probably be feeling no pain with all the meds I had after the hysterectomy.
I have been drinking water, flavored water,crystal lite, soup broth and sugar free popsicles. Already I have had to tell myself no to the habbits of taking a bite of dry cereal as I fixed my daughter a bowl this morning. Had such bad habbits like that before. Just a chip or two, just a nibble here or there. NO MORE!!! I am not giving in!!! I am so ready for the new me to reveal itself in full and I refuse to sabotage myself.
My uncle just called me from Wyoming. I had mailed him a box of materials about this surgery before I went in, because he's given up. He didn't realize till today that I'd actually HAD the surgery already. SO we talked I think for about 2hrs. The first thing he said to me was, "I jsut don't think I could do this and follow the rules." He had not read any personal stories yet or seen any before and after pics. I sent him print-outs of some men on this site that I thought may inspire him and he hadn't even read them yet. I told him to do so and to talk with his doc....one of his docs had already brought up this surgery before. I he works with a man trying to get it now. So I am very hopeful he'll pursue this. I hope I am successfull and show him how it can change his life too. My sister is also workign to find someone near her to do it...she's still having troubles because of her FactorV blood disease.
I am going back to my doc in the morning because I have some red swollen areas on my stomach where he had inserted tiney tubes that feed medication to the incision site. I removed them today because one was leaking since last night. For those who have no idea what I am talkign about, sorry I dont' know the term for it, but it's a new thing he's using to help with the pain at the incision on OPEN RNY. Don't know if it's an option with the lap.
Anyway, just checking to see if it's an infection. I sure hope not but I'd rather be safe than sorry. A friend had some spots and they went away on there own but I'd rather Have Dr Callery take a look.
Well, thanks for reading my profile! I hope it's helpful to those looking into this. Everyone has a different experience and it's good to learn about them all and know what the possibilities are. GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE no matter what stage you are in. I will keep posting even after my move to a new state. My Dr said if I am here for my 2month post-op I should be just fine. But I am hoping to make some connections where I am moving to find support there too. I have made such good friends nearby here and will keep those going online...gotta love the net!!!
One more thing I see posted all the time....what did I eat that day before surgery?? My surgeon only says no fatty foods. SO I grilled 2 chicken breasts on the bbq grill and ate one at lunch and the other at supper, both on a hamburger bun with miracle whip. I had a bagel with a tiny bit of peanut butter and jelly on it at b-fast. No soda at all for about 3 days before.
If you have any questions for me just send an email and I will be glad to answer.
Take care evryone!!!
05-06-04
Well I had my first post-op weigh-in today. I've lost 17pounds!!
That's wonderful news! I did not expect that much. I am 10 days out. After my visit I attended a class with others who had surgery the same week as me. WE talked about foods we can begin trying etc....So Off to the grocery store we went (hubby and I). I seemed to have already forgotten the rule not to eat anything with sugar in the first 5 ingrediants! Whoops! Guess someone else will be eating that low carb made with splenda ice-cream I got! You would think "made with Splenda" would mean no sugar?? Bummer. I did have some mashed potatoes and eggs and bacon. I know bacon isn't and okay food quite yet but it did fine. I tested it first and then had two strips (pre-cooked Hormel).
Gotta go care for my little one now. Bye.
05-25-04
Still haven't weighed myself but my clothes are getting bigger or I am shrinking! It's so nice to be able to see the changes and not feel the hunger and headaches and cravings I am used to experienceing when i would do diets in the past.
My husband and I made a trip to the midwest to buy a new home and I was a bit worried about eating on that trip but it went fine. I packed beef jerky and almonds and gum(a no-no with some docs)and also some Crytal Light. Then I would order chili, veg soup, low-carb wrap(at Subway) and I would eat only what I knew was good for me at this phase in the journey. I got sick after eating a few bites from a skillet breakfast at Country Kitchen...I think it was just too greasy since I'd had all the foods in it before. Anyway, about 30 mins later, while taking a 2nd drive-by some houses we liked, I had to swing open the car door and I had dry heaves. That's all it was though and then it passed. Wasn't so bad. And that's the only time I've experienced anythign like that.
I am staying away form sugar. I dont' want to know if it will make me dump. It's hard some days but I am doing it.
For exercise I am only walking for now. That's more than I used to do though. We are walking as a family..kids ride their bikes and hubby walks with me and our doggie, Molli. So far we've only done just over a mile each time. I hope to keep increasing that. And we are trying to walk every night.
Only about 3 weeks till we move form this home. We'll be traveling for a few weeks because our new home won't be ready till then. WE bought one still under construction. It's our first NEW house and it's very exciting. I am also excited to be working on my new body at this time. WE are moving to an area with alot of outdoor activity possibilities so I am glad that I will be able to enjoy doing those at a weight that will not be uncomfortable and will not hinder my ability to even participate.
Well, hope anyone reading this is doing well on their journey no matter where you are. I am so glad I took this step!!
08-16-04
Oh my goodness it's been a long time since I've been on here. All this moving and getting situated has taken time. All is well though and we are happy to be in our new home in MO. I have been doing great with my weight loss journey. I have lost 63 pounds so far and am down to a size 16 jeans. Some are even lose on me! I am walking still and tomorrow I get to pick up my new Weider Crossbar exercise machine. I am very excited about that and hope to see some changes once I begin using it. So far my skin is not as saggy as I had thought it might be so that's good! I could lose another 60 pounds eventually thouhg so it's hard to say what it will look like then.
I've been in touch with my CA wls friends thru email since leaving and it's so good to hear how they are all doing. Also, my sister is just waiting for ins to approve her and she's off to get wls also.
I found a job here already, working in the school with a disabled child. I wasn't sure if I'd work or go back to school but for now since this was open it sounded good. Makes me available for my own kids when they aren't in school and I like that.
Well, I'll update more often now I hope. If anyone has any questions, feel free to email me. I just updated that on here.
02-19-05
Okay so I haven't updated more often....oops! But all is well with me and I am now down over 100 pounds! Today I weighed in at 146...I began at 251 the day of my surgery. I am very pleased with my progress and still have had no concerns or regrets. I have been going to CURVES and loving that. I feel I have a wonderful second chance at life now...it's wonderful! We jsut bought our first boat this weekend so I am now looking forward to spending weekends at the lake this summer and actually being able to enjoy being physically active! I will try to get my phot taken in January posted here. That's the most recent I have. I've lost about 1 jean size since that picture..I now wear a 10 missy size or an 11 jr size. What a great feeling!
Later......
06-10-05
Oh my where does the time go??? I can't beleive it's been so long since my last post? I decided to get back on here after getting an email form another OH member. So where do I start???
"Life is Good" I bought myself a ball cap that says that! That pretty much sums it all up right now! : ) I am exercising regularly, faithfully for the first time in my life. I am sticking to a pretty strict diet that I have chosen for myself and not had any trouble doing it. I am to the point in this journey where I COULD eat about anything I want and I'd not get sick. However, I KNOW what I've done to get where I am today and I am not going to blow this!
I worked in a classroom this past school year and my co-workers would always have their cookies and candybars and could never believe that I'd pass every time. When we had carry-ins, they'd send me to get more desserts for them. I had my own treats though that were okay in my book. I'd get them to try one and they couldn't believe I actually ate the stuff! It was pretty funny. But, I beleive I've gotten used to not having sugar and so the Spenda sweetened things taste really good to me. I stay away from all foods and drinks with more than 5 sugars per serving, bread, carbonated beverages of any kind, and of course I watch the fat and carbs. I don't worry about the natural sugars in fruit, as fruit has become like candy to me now. I used to never enjoy eating fruit! I love smoothies now with strawberries, mango and bananas with carb monitor yogurt, and ice, and maybe some splenda added in. Those are such a treat! And I have even gotten some non-WLS friends hooked on those too.
I also really enjoy Carbwise gold bars and South Beach diet peanutbutter flavor bars. I eat Carb Solutions protien bars also in penutbutter flavor and choc. brownie flavor (they aren't as yummy as the others I mentioned but a good source of protien on the go when I don't have time for real food)
So as I said above, life is good! I am enjoying doing many things I did not even try to do before. Even little things like riding my bike! I don't feel to big to be on it anymore! I have been trying out the toys behind the boat at the lake this summer too! That's alot of fun but boy am I sore for a couple of days after that! I don't worry about being the biggest mom in the room anymore....living in southern CA, I WAS the biggest mom in the room. Now, wearing 6/8 pants, I am usaully one of the smaller ones. It's a nice feeling for a change!
A couple of years ago for Father's Day, I took my daughters and had a picture made of all of us to give my husband. When I look at that picture now, I can't believe I ever let myself get that big. (makes me really wonder how my husband could have stuck by me without coming down on me more than he did) We just had that picture redone and I must say it turned out awsome! Especially when it's side by side the other. I think Jim will be very happy with it....he hasn't seen it....although I forwarded it to all our friends and family already! : )
I will try to get another full body photo done since I am down 2 more sizes. My sister had surgery in September and has lost over 100pounds now! She is doing wonderful for being in a rural area with no local support groups. When I was in CA those support meetings were SOOOOOOO helpful. If you have a chance to be part of a support group or even several groups, DO IT! It really makes a difference and gives you what you need to be successful! I'd never taken part in a support group for any reason so I was leary at first, but so glad to have done it now!
If you are reading this and just getting started on your journey and you have any questions, feel free to email me! Or if you are further into this like me and just want to share, that's great too! This has been the best thing I have ever done for myslef and I still would not change a single thing!
Incase anyone is wondering, I have not had any plastic surgery yet and don't know if I will. I am hoping that with exercise I can get to a point where I am comfortable with what I have. : )
If it were free and painless, I'd do it tomorrow! I worry about all that pain more than anything! The pain of WLS is nothing compared to PS from what I hear. I did fine without morphine once I left the hosp. after WLS though. We'll have to jsut see how things work out I guess.
One more thing that happened recently and was so great....I finally took all my rings and bracelets in to get sized down and my wedding ring is now smaller than the day I got married! I was thinking I should get out my dress and see if it's big too! It's funny I don't feel smaller but I am wearing smaller clothes than I did then so I AM smaller, whether I feel it or not.
Later.........
07-14-05
Hi all. This has been a great week! My kids have been gone and I have had the week to myself..first time in 7 yrs I have been without kids more than a couple of days! I went shopping first and bought a SKIRT! I can't tell you the last imte I bought one or wore one! The next day I wore it out and felt pretty good in it, especially after recieving a few compliments so today I bought a few more! An old friend came to town to visit and we went shopping for the day...she talked me into getting a few things that would never have been in my wordrobe a year ago! It's so cool to be able to go in a store and buy off the small/medium racks! My new skirts are a size 6!! I am loving this new life!!!
Tonight I went on the message board here at OH and saw a call for an Angel so I volunteered. I hope to be an inspirtaion to someone beginning this journey as so many were for me when I started. I never had an angel then but I had several good friends from support group in CA who helped me through the tough times, and also coming to this site and reading other's profiles and seeing the pics was so encouaraging!
Time to get to bed now!!! Good luck everyone!
07-15-05
I was thinking that another big thing happened this week! The first thing I did this weeek was to go and get a new driver's license picture. I had to because people were questioning whether the person in the pic was me! lol I had had the old pic taken after surgery at the point of having lost 40 pounds but I'd lost another 75 pounds. Even at the DMV, they didn't think it was the same person! What a great feeling to know I have changed THAT MUCH! So now I have a beautiful driver's license picture...best one since I was 16!! LOL I still tell people though that I may look good on the outside but under these clothes it's pretty scary looking! LOL You don't go from a size 20/22 to a 6/8 and not have any skin issues! But I'm dealing with that and am just still so happy that all the other pounds have gone away forever!
Have a great day!!! I Plan to!!!
08-08-05
I have had a rough weekend...learned that my special online friend, Cesar Lorenzo, passed away only 2 days after his WLS surgery. I was his OH Angel...now I will think of him as mine. I was sooooo touched to read all of the posts to him, about him, etc... on this OH site. He was a visitor on the singles board and the Sex before and after wls board and I posted for him there to let all his friends know how he'd done after surgery. He was doing fine m then without warning he passed away. Still waiting on word fromhis family to try to learn the medical reasons why he did not make it.
I had been on a comping trip with my family when I heard the news form his cousin. I came home to post to the boards and let everyone know the sad news. Many tears were shed for Cesar and my heart was soooo heavy with this news. Such a good person looking forward to a better life, once the weight went down. He had told me he wanted to settle down and begin a family in the next few years. We chatted often online and spoke on the phone a coupel of times before his surgery. I was waiting for him to call as a post-op....I'd asked him once he felt up to it to please call me. I never got that call. Just form what others have posted on the boards about him, I know he was an Angel on earth too because he touched the hearts of sooo many people who had never even met him. That takes a special person. He encouraged me to live my life for me, take the chances I'd been afraid to take, and do not be afraid to reach for my dreams....whatever would make ME happy.
I was not looking forward to rejoining my family for our camping weekend at the lake. How could I when I have this sad news to deal with? But the more I thought it over the more determined I got that Cesar would want me to continue reaching for my goals..living the life I'd worked to get to through WLS....so I went back out there more determined than ever that I would learn to wake board this weekend. And I did it! I am posting some pics of the first times I actually madeit up on a wake board! I talked to Cesar the whole time I was trying to get up!! : ) I think he was smiling down on me. He'll always have a special place in my heart, and I will miss him so much.
Cesar these pics are for you buddy! And guess what else Cesar..I woke up Sunday morning with this song going through my head...the verse was..."do you wanna go for a ride" by the Twilight Singers. Thanks for showing me some new music too!!! I bought that cd the day of your surgery! LOVE YOU CESAR! (Cesar's profile: http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?N=L1110820131 )
8/14/15
Okay I was thinking I need to post some things in here about relationships. Mostly for all you pre-ops who may read this....and I have been increasling getting emails from pre-ops letting me know how much they appreciate my profile and how I update it. There's something major I have not touched on in here much. WLS greatly affects your relationships with others and most importantly how you see yourself after teh weight loss.
I've been married 14 yrs this month....My husband Jim (who I'll post a pic of soon once he chooses the one he wants up) is a great guy! He really is. But we've been lacking that affection I crave for a long time. As a pre-op I had settled and figured I was just lucky he hadn't left me because when we married I was a size 9...I ballooned to a size 20/22 and I know he was no longer physically attracted to me. (this was only a suspicion before, but I know it is fact now after we have talked) I can't blame him...I was miserable half the time, moody as hell, and jsut feeling so bad about ME that I could not have been much fun to be with. We could enjoy no recreational things together either and he's big into rec. activities. He's always bee a perfect 10 in my book. I've always found him attractive.
Before my surgery I braough hubby to support groups....we heard al the rumors about how WLS can bring divorce to a marriage and I was thinking NOT MINE...there is no way this can brig anythign but good to mine because mine is already so good (DENIAL!) So I get his supportnow to go ahead with WLS and the journey begins...all is pretty okay until just recently....I start noticing men notice me. I get compliments form other womena ll the time too! I get NO attention at home though..at least it seems that way to me. So, we have alot to work through. I do not want a new husband, I jsut want to be the wife he should ave had for the last 14 yrs and I want the husband I deserve now too. We BOTH have settled through this mariage, in different ways, but some the smae too. I'm trying hard now to be patient with him, because the affection isn't coming natural to him after havig not shown it for so long. He's makig great efforts though..it's not been easy, we've been reading a book together called His Needs, Her Needs and also the owrkbook that goes with it. It's really helped to open both our eyes to some harsh realilities of jsut what is MISSING in our home/lives. We have two wonderful kids (ages 11 and 6-girls) and they have not seen there parents be loving and affectionate much at all. We need to show them by example now...when they see us kissign now they are very giggly because tehy just havne't been around that with us.
Sad but true.
We are very much willing to do whatever it takes to make things better and meet each others needs now. i just wanted to add to my profile this one thing that I'd been reluctant to share here....I've posted a few times about all this but not to my profile. The story goes alot deeper than I have shared but just let this serve as a warning to you that all is not peachy with everyone's relatinships post-op and you may one day realize you were in denial about your relatinship as I was due to your weight and feeling like you were unworthy of anything more than you were getting. This new me, this new body, this whole new lease on life has brought MANY changes that I never dreamed of. It's a tough road for some of it but in the "big picture" it's all worth the work.
Good luck to you all!!!! Feel free to email me if you have any questions at all.
Hugs,T
Okay It's time for a relationship update! We've been discussing ALOT lately and as I mentioned above, been reading a book together. It is helping still. I have made several "confessions" lately, some voluntarily, some forced by being caught! : ) Anyway, Jim has seen that I'd been getting attention through friendships with males that he had no clue of before. Lots of phone calls, etc....with my guy friends getting the support he'd not given me. I'd shopped alot more than he knew, spending money on new clothes etc....shopping has always been an addiction!! lol Jim's been pretty good through all these revelations, even though the ugly green monster DID rear it's head. But in the grand picture that was not a bad thing. He also went to his first support group meeting with me (he'd been to one pre-op but not post) and I was so proud of him. He shared our experience and warned other spouses not to make the mistake he'd made by not being supportive. Jim only read my OH profile last week for the first time. He then created his own profile on OH....he has yet to really put anything on it though but he has been on the boards now and even in chat. He said he hopes maybe he can support some of the spouses and share our experience.
Anyway, he shared at the meeting that he is falling in love with me all over again....that we'd been living like roommates and that's all changing and he doesn't want to lose me but he knows it was ALMOST too late for us. Others thanked him for sharing and even asked some questions....many in our group are going through similar things....others shared though, that this surgery has only improved their marriage. That's a wonderful thing for those couples....but for those like US, it's good to know we arent alone.
Our lives are getting better. We are concentrating on each other more. Making time in our days for us one on one.....no interuptions.
Planning for dates. Just enjoying being with each other like we haven't done for so long. So there is hope still! : )
All this relationship stuff has I think caused me some stress and as a result my hairloss has increased. I am hoping it is only the stress causing that! We'll see if it slows down.
I am also looking for a new job now....no longer happy in my current job...so there too may be some stress.
My weight has been bouncing aorund now between 136 and 141. I am okay with that. I still go to CURVES and am still trying to be very careful with my eating. Still do not drinking SODA! YES!!! That's a biggie for me....dont want to ever drink it again. I know it was not a good habit for ME.
I used to paint alot when younger...haven't done it much in years but my sister asked me to paint a homemade surfboard for her co-worker's college apt. so I did. It was alot of fun....I did a whole wall mural like this when I was in HS in my parents basement...it's still there! lol I'm posting a pic of the board here.
Take care everyone and thanks for reading! Good luck in your journey!!!
Hugs,
11-13-05
For the past week I have been gathering information and talking to others with experience on getting approved for plastic surgery. I had a consult a few weeks back and I now have my letter ready to go. I'll be giving it to my surgeons office tomorrow. WISH ME LUCK! My surgeon would like to do a circumferencial lower body lift. He says he could get 8 inches vertically off the front of my abdomen and 4-6 from the sides and back. (I also want to get breast augmentation...opting for a small implant to get me back to my natural size, not bigger than before and sinec I have very little inner breast tissue left a lift is not an option in my opinion.)
I had a physical with my pcp and got checked for a hernia....don't seem to have one although he feels a definate separation in my abdominal muscles. I have been having SOME issues with reflux so I was referred for a scoping which will be Dec 6th. I also had labs done, don't have my results yet, but hadn't had them checked in a year so it was time.
Thanks for reading....good luck on your journey and feel free to email me if you would like to ask me anything. : )
2-03-06
Well since I last updated I got my scoping done and found that enerything looks very healthy and normal. So that means I may be one of those people who always needs to take Ranitidine for reflux to keep in under control. I can deal with that.
Know what else I can deal with? I was APPROVED for some plastic surgery on my first request!!!!!! THANK YOU BCBS-CA!!!! They approved me for an abdominalplasty so far. My PS is trying to get me approved for more but he thinks it was my letter that got this first part approved. HE and my PCP couldn't believe it! lol I will probalby have to wait till April though due to my job and benefits. Need to build up more paid time off so I won't lose my ins benefits while on leave. Jim is having knee surgery for a torn meniscus (sp??) in 2 wks and then I'll be having plastics....he complaining it's really going to cut into our wake boarding season coming soon! LOL MEN!!! : )
I've joined a team at work where we are trying to lose weight...I'm not really trying to lose but jsut be very conscious about maintaining and keeping up with my exercise. I've been trying to do Windsor pilates at home on days I am not going to CURVES. I can really FEEL the workouts and love that. I figure the better shape I am in when I have plastics then faster I'll be able to heal.
I noticed in that pic of me above with the surf board that I painted, you can SEE my skin around my waiste that will be gone soon!! Can't wait!!!!! SO for those OH guys who tell me they see no extra skin.....there is the proof, hiding under that shirt!!!
Till next time......: )
05-20-06 Just realized I hadn't updated on the plastics pre-op. Sooooo here goes, Ins denied the PS other than abdominalplasty. It took ALOT of cinvincing for hubby to agree to pay the rest out of pocket but thankfully he did agree. I've posted details on the Plastic surgery message board. Anyway, had the circumferencial lower body lift on 5-10-06!!!!! YESSSSS!!!!! Dr Carl Price in Springfield, MO was my surgeon and so far, seems to have done a WONDERFUL job!! He'd only done a "handful" of this exact proceedure so I had to have FAITH!
10 days post my full lower body lift. FEELING GREAT!!!!! The last 2 days I was out and about away from the house. Actually drove myself yesterday. No pain meds since day 6. Started with 4 drains, one came out day 6 and then two more out on day 9 and the last one will come out next Tuesday. It's drainign under 25cc in 24hrs but he wanted to leave it in till Tuesday to be safe, to avoid a seroma. I'm not going to argue with that as much as I'd like to see it go. I'd never had drains before but no pain with them, while in or when taken out.
The one shocker with all this was the SWELLING in my privates. I was not prepared for that when I saw it in the mirror!! lol But, alas, it has gone away.....as of day 8. Thank GOD!!! lol I am noticing an issue with teh urine stream now but will hope with the rest of the swelling going away that will improve....tends to go forward and to the right! lol I'd heard this can be an issue, so not surprised. It can be dealt with.
I'm seeing more and more everyday how much better I look in the morror! No more hanging skin!!!!! I'm pleased so far. I have a new belly button which ended up having to be located in the center of my original open RNY scar. That scare had previously been all above the belly button.
I still feel as if I can't stand up completely straight....getting better each day though. And I still sleep in the recliner as I can not yet lie flat, without some discomfort.
If anyone has this procedure in their future and you have any questions, feel free to ask!
And I haven't taken any pics yet but will soon. I do have pre-op photos as well of the SKIN that needed to be removed. if you want to see the change you can email me a request.
10/17/06 Oh my goodness!! What changes on this site!! I'm TRYIGN to update and get with the program here but NIPTUCK is calling my name as I type!! Gotta go watch it!!!
Life is grand still! PS went very well, have my 6 mo re-ck this month. Happy for the most part with the results....I have some uneveness of my hips but that was to be expected and I was warned some revisions may be required form theget-go. I have lots of pics I'm willing to share for EDUCATION of others interested in scaring etc....my scars look wonderful!!! Still leaning towards a tattoo though!! However it's a year of healing at least befire they can tattoo it. I've not ever had any tatoos so this will be exciting!!!
I'll post pics soon. HUGS to all!!!
05/17/08
Well, alomost 2yrs later.....was that I typo? Has it really been two yrs?? Well that uneven hip thing worked itself out. I had one more small aount of lipo when I had my breast aug donebut then all was fine and I've been very pleased with my results. I've not worked out much in 2008 which shows on my body and now that summer is here I'm ready to get busy working out agian!!
Major changes are ahppening in my life. I've decided I KNOW for the first time in my adult life what I want to do as a career...I'm going back to college in August (Fulltime) to finsih my bachelor of science in psychology and then go on to the masters in counseling program. I've run into several obsatacles in the process like my prior 80+ credit hours not transferring over the way I hoped so I've had to meet with multiple dept heads and to asst provost to convince them to sign off my my courses. There's only ONE so far that hasn't and that's my gen ed PE credits. I figure I CAN certainly use the fitness course though so I've enrolled for the fall to take that. I have laughed that I may be the old fart of the class, but I am so excited to be going back, regardless.
My family is sacrificing which makes me feel bad but, at thethe same time, I feel in the long run we'll ALL benefit from my degree. I am choosing to NOT work while I go to school. School never came easy forme the first time around...I worked FT and took classes FT and my GPA shows it!! It's barely high enough to get me into my degree program. So NO working for the time being. Eventually, if I feel I can handle it, we'll see. So financially things will be changing big time for us. Jim's NOT excited about that. He's opted to sell our boat and his truck to get a more economical vehicle. Mine will suffice for me. I actually think my school schedule will allow me more time to help with my family than my work schedule has for the past 2 yrs. So I have faith this will all work out and that's the story I'm stickin' to!!!
As for my weight.....I've battled the typical demons at 4 yrs post-op....carbs are my enemy!!! I have to be very careful there and I've learned some lessons the hard way...which is what we all have to do eventually. I'm still in my size 6 aqlthough SOME are a bit snug right now since I've not been working out, but I intend to change that. I've got enough workout equipment in y home now to have NO MORE EXCUSES!!! I can' do everything I need to do in the comfort of my home now.
If' you've read this, thanks for stopping by. Best wishes to you on your journey!!! Maybe I'll post again before another 2 yrs passes....... 
About Me
Before & After
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