classyma

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OMGOODNESS, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS i just checked my email and had a congrats for my wls aniversary, which i had totally forgotten about.  i haven't been on the boards since i last posted about finding out i was w/child.  yes, i had a baby boy 8/22/07 at 6 somethin' in the a.m. lol, i named him Deno aka ma sweetnin'.  he is now 8 months today as a matter of fact. i gained 40lbs.[horrible isn't it??] thru my pregnancy and am sorry to say i'm only down 10lbs. since i had the baby, which i know is horrible, but i must be honest.  i haven't been trying to lose as i should, i can still feel my pouch working from time to time, i just started back exercising like a week ago b/c i just feed up with myself not being able to get into my pants/jeans.  it's is like i said coming off but very slowly and it's coming off on it's on b/c like i said the 10lbs. came off w/out effort and no it wasn't from the lost of the baby that lost was like 6lbs. right after him and he weighed 5'2, so basically i just lost him and some oz.'s of h2o. i had been thinking of comin' to the boards and at least posting about my new boy b/c i just left y'all hangin' with that, but as some can probably imagine with all the new changes i just never found the time.  in fact i just cheked my email this a.m. b/c i need to email my teacher that i wouldn't b to class today, i'm in skool to becum a surgical technologist, i have just a little over a year to go.  annywhoo, i cheked the baf board out briefly and everyone look so good, it made me reminsce about my earlier wls days what a wonderful feeln' it was!!  thank God i have so many pix to remember. hopefully i can come back later as now i need to go ahead and email my teacher.  blessings to everyone on your journey.

it's me again.  as i promised i would update once i tested and i did.  yes ya gurl tested positive for baby.  something is happening to me b/c i'm noticing how i'm spelling everything wrong maybe it's b/c i'm rushing.  i just realized i spelled positive wrong... big as day... on the boards DAWG!!  i can't stand lookn' stupid like that.  on my profile ok b/c i'm typing from the top of ma head but dawg on the boards.  anywhoo,  i'm seven weeks per the dr.  as far as the vits/supplements what they do is take the standard prenatal blood work and they will find out from there if i have any lackings in my blood which i shouldn't i started taking prenatal and folic acid last friday, i just went to target and brought me some.  it's a good thing tho that i'm craving veggies and fruit.  i must say my first sign of cravings had to be when i started craving pickle. not just any pickle u know the ones u get at the corner store in the big jar usually near/at the meat counter  lol?  i must've been preggy then that was around mlk day b/c i remember being at the mlk parade and my friend pulled out a pickle which i had been craving and my mouth got so watery, i was salivating.  now lately i've been wanting fruit and veggies alot.  hopefully it will stay this way.  LORD U GUYS CAN IMAGINE MY BIGGEST FEAR!!! THE WEIGHT THANG.  i must mention i am really scared b/c when i gain weight when i'm pregnant i do it up big time that's what landed me to have wls as with the last two i gained 100lbs and it wouldn't go anywhere  [i did gain some afterwards also as my baby was 3 y/o when i had surgery].  i've been going thru the sickness/vomiting/sleeping.  saturday i almost couldn't get out the bed.  the only thing that got me up was that i realized we had ran out of toilet paper, there was one roll in each bathroom and a sista' just can't go out like that no matter what.  ended up picking up a couple of preggy friendly outfit pieces.  dawg i gotta problem...pray for me.   as u can tell i posted some new pix on my profile.  i've just forgot about my picture trail but it's still there too but not updated.  hey i gotta get up from here and get it crackn' with the youngin's i got now, i mean u have to tell them step by step everything to do when they do the same thang every night.  hey if u get a chance roll thru and check me again.  i'll b here.  HAPPY VALENTINES DAY.  BLESSINGS

hey it's ya gurl, i'm back again.  hey i awoke several nights ago straight out of a pleasant sleep.  u know one of those when u wake up with your eyes so wide they look like they gone pop outta your head, yea one of those rude awakenings.  i realized that i had not had a period for the month of January. OMG not this!!! i shouted.  instant stress engulf my whole being.  then i start thinking of all the clothes i've been buying and how i'm not going to be able to wear them as i got several summer pieces already.  nope i have not gotten a pregnancy test yet but i have a period that comes no matter what!! when i say no matter what.....i mean no matter what!! and the first missed period is good as gold that i am pregnant.  however in this instance i've been trying to convince myself that b/c i'm at the ripe old age of 34 y/o that maybe my body is just going thru something new or maybe since wls maybe my body doing something different.  mind u i'm almost three years post-op in APRIL. wls has not in the past thus far made my monthly not come, but hey i'm desparate!!! tring to not convince myself of the envidable.. that i'm PREGNANT.  i've been trippin' like going to the toilet just to wipe to see it is a trace of blood comin' down.  convinced  that everytime i go to the bathroom this time i will show signs of  my period comin' on.  NOPE.... not a chance thus far,  which i already know this in the back of my mind b/c hey i've been with this body having a menstrual since 12 y/o and i know my body and keep a record of my period every month so if an occasion like this arise i'm not uncertain whether/not i had my monthly.  anywho as u might have figured out i really don't want to be in the motherly way at this time and i must say it's all for vain/fashion reasons.  however i do have to admit that i did stop my depo shots about 3 1/2 months ago to give my body a break as it is recommended to do so.  however, it is also recommended that u do use some form of bc.  but stupid,silly me b/c they express that some may experience a delay of 18 months or more in getting pregnant due to the shot once they stop it.  oh i just knew i had a window of opportunity to relax and kinda clear my body of that stuff, then start back up in maybe 4-5 months as i really did not think i was that fertile so i just knew that rule would most difinitely apply to me of the 18 months.  I REALLY DID!! BUT as it seems to stand right now it did not.  i will go for my official dr. preg. test on the 15th of this month.  yep, i will let u know the official results.  anywho, i'm dealing with it as for now and have started coming to the realization that i will have a little one again and will be back on the delivery table with the baby heart monitor strapped around my stomack listening and anticipating every heart beat of my little newborn.... OMG this is CRAZY!!  however when i think about when people would ask me if i was going to have anymore i would tell them if i did it would mostly n when i'm 35 y/o.  looks like it's going to happen just short my 35th b-day.  welp i'mma get movin' as it's time to start herding the cattle [my kids] to take baths , feed and get ready for another day lol lol. i'm just messing, i know that sounds horrible,  but sometimes it does feel like that as i do have to guide them on every movement.  btw their ages are 14, 8 and 6 y/o. hey hit me back in a couple and chek out what's goin' on.  thanks and bless u for stopping by and being with me in my expedition.

it's me what a surpize, i'm even surprizin maself.  i felt like getting on oh today and updating things.  anywhoo, i was noticing everybody that have been having all the after care surgeries after wls like the tt, excess skin removed, even hernia repair.  i haven't done any of that, which i'm approaching my third year out and haven't gained anything back yet.  thanks b to God.  i actually lost 2lbs. when i went to the dr.'s this past friday from the last time i weighed maybe 2-3 months earlier.  however i really need to buckle down and get this hernia repaired as it is an unsightly pest, when it comes to viewing my profile [side view].  i have the kind that comes to a point right in the middle of my stomach, a point!! sometimes when i'm full it can appear that i'm even pregnant.  it's all my fault for being lacadacious [sp] and not taking c/o of my business.  if  i did that my tummy would appear to be flat as if i did have a tt.  i don't have any profile pix on here but on my picture trail i do.  gosh... that reminds me i haven't check that in months.  well friday i go take the test to be accepted in the nx prog. at the university of cal state l.a. and hopefully i will pass it.  things have changed so much with school from when i was at usc doing nx. there.  the program used to be 2 yrs. now they've cranked it up to 3 yrs. with all the cultural classes we have to take to be ready to deal the diversity of races we will encounter. so please pray for me.  i believe this is going to happen as it is past time for me to proceed on with my life.  i'm so far from where i started out [referring to wls and school] and so far from where i wanted to be.  i had it all planned out but sometimes things happen that you don't forsee or plan on/for.  but you know what?... dear God at this point, day, time i'm my life..... i'm here and here is where i will try, try, try again.  i realized no matter how many times you try keep trying til u succeed. look at all famous people, inventors, even presidents, etc., etc.  they all tried at their accomplishments more than we could probably imagine before they succeeded.  that's where i'm at in my expedition at this time is to press on toward the mark of the high calling. looking forward to the things which are before leaving those things to be which are behind me and just b/c you don't make it one attempt do not mean u will not on the next attempt.  the here and now just might not be where God want u to be right now, but if you keep trying and seeking him he will bring it to pass but in the mean time give thanks for where u are/have b/c good r bad it just be right where God need/want u.  enriching ilfe long lessons come in all forms many in forms we don't want/ are expecting. i say today press on and don't torment yourself over what u feel should have been, just preservere on to what u want, no matter what people say and feel.  if you want something and u feel confident it is for u go for and you'll be the better for it.  b/c think u have the good sense God gave u to evaluate the consequences of your actions, granted we are entitled to still make mistakes if we don't evaluate accurately lol lol.  but u will never know til u try.  welp i think i got ma feeln's out for the day.  i can't find much to post to on the boards as i don't frequent them too often and think my posting out of sync and most of the new folks don't know me anyways [u know what i mean]. hey enuff of that,  if you get some more free time come back and pay me a visit, cuz i will be back with much more too say.

hey everyone yep, it's ya gurl passing thru lol.  welp the days and months have come and gone and i'm approaching my third year post-op which is a trip within itself.  omg so much has changed with me and the oh board.  side note:  if you have emailed me asked to be a friend please for give me if i do not respond in a timely manner, as i'm still learning this new site.  its has changed alot since i first began on here in 2003.  anywho i'm still maintaining my wl, excercise, vits/supplements, however i could do better with the water intake.  don't get me wrong i get mines in but i could be doing better with it overall.  i posted a pic with some exercise shorts on which i strongly hesitated to do as i still feel my thunder thighs are still a little too big to expose like that, but hey they shole ain't as big as they were 100+lbs. ago and for that i am thankful to God for the blessing of wls. so i'mma celebrate me and not suppress me u feel me?  look in the mirror and make peace with myself and fall in luv with me for just who God made me to be and be all i can be.  cuz really i'm not all that bad.  sometimes you gotta wake yourself up b/c even though most of the weight has come off and even better... God has blessed me to maintain the wl and that is a feat within itself, at least for me, sometime i can fall back into the old mind thinking.  feeling like i'm still not good enough, but i have to be honest it all stems from comparing myself to someone else.  but i came to the conclusion, i can't be someone else personal best i can only be Moneice's personal best, which is good enuff for God himself so i betta shut up and celebrate those who have achieved and be happy for what i accomplished.  when i focus on myself and my life and all that it entails honey, i realize it takes alot of energy to focus, comment [negatively] or even envy what someone else is doing/not doing in their life, and who has time for that b/c once i get thru shopping, dressing, hair, dealing with my family/job, paying/making bills.. gurl please, i'm exhausted and can only congratulate someone on their achievements and keep pressing on to the mark of the high calling IN MY LIFE :).  LIKE i said on my 1/1/07 post, which i don't know what happen to it.  i'm simply sincerely happy to be here in the land of the living, u hear me!!  i know this year God is going to open some of the doors i've been knocking on.  this year my motto is Preserverance!!!!  if you fail, fail, fail, fail, fail, get up dust yourself off and keep trying b/c if you give up u will not know if that last attempt  would have been successful and u would have received what you'd been seeking, ya feel me?!  sometimes we have to pursue and stay before God for, longer than we would like but in the end when we win, it is a sweet victory and we know how to savor it and appreciate it. welp, i think  i'mma get up from here and put a load of clothes in the washing machine and head out to hang out for a while at ma gurls.  it's saturday and Classyma wants ta get in ta somethin'  lol...lol.  hey don't forget to check ya gurl out from time to time b/c i do enjoy your company and hope you in enjoy your visit to my expedition.  blessing b unto u and yours til next time.

1/3/07- i added a post on 1/1/07 but i'm not sure where it went.

my expedition started many moons ago at this point.  as i stated before i have a couple of profiles floating around somewhere on this site.
i started my expedition sometime in early 2004 at the ripe age of 32 years with three beautiful children and a very supportive stand by me kinda husband.  well as you can assume everything went well with me having surgery and many things has changed from then to now.  the whole process was uneventful start to finish with me getting approved without a hitch or delay, to all my testing going smooth and coming back like clock work leading to a speedy approval, to me having an uneventful surgery and recovery never returning to the hospital for nothing but my scheduled check ups.  the only really eventful thing was that my surgery was pushed up from june 04' to april 04'.  i would say besides all that i had the typical worries of what the if's.  but my mind never faultered on whether i will or whether i will not.  nope i had my mind made up on what i was going to do and just prayed to God it was his will for this to be a positive purposful change in my lyfe.  heck after all if i didn't have wls i would have a poor quality of lyfe and most likely die prematurely b/c of weight related complications or i was going to lay on that table and let my Dr. cut me an possibly come out just as i did.  so far it has been da bomb!!! it's been wonderful, rewarding, disappointing, ground breaking, amazing, OMG, to what will God do next!!!  it's been up, down, and definitely been an all round expedition.  it's made me feel like i'm more of who i really am and not hidden with all the weight and negativity it conjured up inside of me.  i feel i could be better [wl wise] but dear God i'm here and he blessed me and i'm at my perfect self for this season and who knows what the perfect me will be in my next season. for God said there is a season for everything.  i'm two dimes away from where i would like to be. however i never set a goal for maself as with all the issues and disappointments i set maself up for pre-op i just simply did not want to set maself up for them post-op.  nope not this time.  i decided i would let the cards fall where they may doing my best.  but of course knowing maself ma best just isn't good enuff anyhow.  so hey live and let live and be grateful, thankful, and be able to appreciate where God blesses my brotha/sista to go on their personal journey.  that way we all can't do anything but,.... B HAPPY :).   
IT'S crazy b/c i feel like the older i get with the help of wls, i feel like dang i'm just now starting to live at the old age of 34 y/o [as my 13 y/o says, i'm getting old...lol]and enjoyin' lyfe.  i feel set free b/c of wls and my motto is LIKE FINE WINE... I JUST GET BETTA WITH TYME, AND CAN MAKE THE STRONGEST/FINEST MAN SPEND MILLIONS ON ME AND END UP FALLIHG TO HIS KNEES WHEN HE'S FILLED UP WITH ME AND STILL BEGGING FOR MORE.  TAKE A PICTURE CUZ IT WILL LAST LONGER AND MANY DAYS FROM NOW YOU CAN GO BACK AND BEHOLD MA WONDERFUL IMAGE.  LOL  i'm just funnin' but that's the confidence this surgery will bring back to you.  like many their was a smaller, more confident me before having the hubby/kids/and just plain ole livin' and losing yourself to being a wife/mother/career woman.  God blessed me with wls at a point i knew without a shadow of a doubt i couldn't over come my shortcoming without wls. thru the many attempts, short lived successes and drag down defeats and desparate cries within maself b/c i was so ashamed to share my hurts/pains with anyone else sometimes even my husband, however knowing i wasn't really hiding from anyone b/c everyone could see my 293lbs. oppression.  unlike other disorders/dependencies overeaters we can't hide our down fall/dependency/disorder.  even some drug addicts are functionally drug addicts.  but ours it's all over our face and body for all to tell...there is no hiding our dependency.  it's crazy b/c our dependency is so closely related to our lively hood b/c without eatting we can't live and with our food PROPORTION DISTORTION it will make us unable to live.  is that a catch 22?  unlike smokers if they never smoked it will not kill them, drinkers, and so on and so on.  it gets to a point [pre-op, heck sometime even now post-op] even if you eat only when your body is physically giving you signs of hunger you feel guilty sometime consquently leading you to eat more to ease your hurt b/c it's what?!! YOUR DRUG, YOuR PEACE, YOUR COMFORT, YOUR LEVEL GROUND WHEN THINGS R SHAKY.  but thank God for wls b/c it resolves of those issues but DEFINITELY NOT all.  some issues you may have to seek professional or spiritual help.  well i must go for now as i have a bunch of laundry i must put away but with God help i will return and sooner than later, as i've been off the boards for a while just letting my pc collect dust.  i guess you just get busy living, not intentionally neglecting your profile.  i try to do better.  blessing and stay tuned til next time