cglenn

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What a weekend!!!  Friday was great!!  I have a new nephew born Jace Charles weighed in 9lbs8oz.  He is beautifull.  My husband of coarse got the baby hunger again as if 6 isnt enough... lol this is what I love about my husband.  No matter how crazy our kids make us, he melts at the sight of a newborn and thinks maybe just one more.... Then I slap him upside the head back into reality that our baby is almost 5 and starting kindergarten next year and she wipes her own butt and can finally puke unassisted in the toilet.  Speaking of puke that is all I did this wonderfull Mothers day weekend.  I hate to puke, I will lay miserably for hours just to not puke.  Now my boys have been up all night and day.  I think we are at the tail end of the pukes now.  My house smells like a toilet and I dont care to see greenbeans ever again!!!

Today I had my first visit with my new knee surgeon.  He seams nice.  I thought I might have knee replacement, he thinks if we could just do a little clean up and hold out and get 5 years out of this one I will be better off.  My knee has had 3 surgerys on it and hurts all the time.  I am in a catch 22 because of my weight I dont want knee surgery, but because of my knee I cant excercise to loose the weight.  Anyway I am getting an MRI to see exactley what is going on.  Probably just a clean up and see how it goes.  Again though seamed like a very nice doctor and I could tell he loves his job.

On the Weight loss Surgery front.  I am waiting for my surgeons hospital to become a center of excellence.  I really want Dr.Tersigne.  Although I havent met him yet I just have the fealing that he is who I want.  We belong to the same church, and has come highly recommended by a friend of mine who has had a few friends go see him.  Even though he is about 4 hours from me I dont mind.  He also doesnt make his patients go through sleep studys and heart studys and all the other crap that i am finding these other docs want so that my bill ends up sky high.  He requires a psych exam and a nutrition consult.  If he examines me and finds something wrong he will order the test.  He just assumes all patients have sleep apnea ect ect.  I dont believe in un-neccesary testing.  I have though made my mind up 100% on this surgery.  

My mom is dead set against it and it hurts that she doesnt support it.  I really feal that alot of my weight problems are because of the diets that I started at age 11.  I was fat in the 6th grade and chubby in the 7th.  By 8th grade I had grown into my weight.  My mom was always on me about my weight and I ended up skipping meals and excercising alot.  I never had a eating disorder but I was close.  Now that I am an adult my metabolism is painfully slow.  It takes a week to loose a pound and a day to gain 8.  I talked to her about this surgery and she had a fit.  I got lecture after lecture untill I lied and told her I had changed my mind.  My husband supports my decision although he wonders how it will work when in all reality I dont eat that much.  I am not a binger and I dont really like sweets alot.  I just gain easy and I need to get more excercise in.  
  
I am excited to be in the secret pals program,  I am a bit sad I havent heard from my pal yet but hopefully soon.  I need a friend really bad that is going through or has gone through what I am.  I dont have alot of friends anyway.  Since I have 6 kids and my own business I am kind of a rotten friend.  Also since my daughter who is 12 has autism I have lost friends and even family members are stand off-ish.  I get hurt sometimes when I only am called to babysit and not get called to hang out.  I shouldnt get hurt feelings but I do.  It seams like I get left behind because I am a convienient babysitter.  I try not to dwell on it but when someone calls to see what I am doing I get my hopes up that maybe I am getting invited to do something when in reality I am only wanted to babysit while they go out.  Or they all go out with my mom and I am watching the kids.  I get jealous i guess.  I dont have any sisters, I have 6 brothers.  My sisters in law all have sisters and they have this cool bond.  My brothers are boys.  I wish I had a really cool neat relationship with any of them but I really dont.

I have babbled long enough.  Hopefully soon Dr. T will have his hospital center of excellence so that I can schedule my appointment with him and finally meet him.
Bye for now

It finally happened, I have insurance.  I just found out today and it started on the 1st of April.  I am so gratefull and thankfull.  I havent had insurance for 5 years.  Granted I am in the oregon health plan which is state pay.  They cover the surgery after 6 months of supervision.  I also need to have repacement surgery which i really dont want untill i loose weight.  It is a very painfull surgery and i really dont want to recover with an extra 100 pounds on top of it.  
I am also the proud new mother of 3 llamas.  They are rescue llamas from the spca here locally.  They are just the most beautifull things.  So smart and gracefull and cute!!  Right now they are still scared of me and are very fearfull of all of us but today which is day 3 of having them here.  Today they ate llama treats out of the bucket i was holding.  They were soo nervous but the power of llama snacks won and they enjoyed.  Hopefully with in the next three weeks i will be able to earn their trust so that i could i can lead them around with a rope.  Again they are sooo stink'n cute.  I need names for them still my kids named one Tina after Napoleon Dynamite the movie about the nerdy kids anyway there was a llama named Tina in the movie.  My beautifull 4 year old wants to name one  Hannah Montana since she loves everything  Hannah.   Well i just wanted to share my news of insurance coverage.  Finally i have caught a brake!!

I am so mad!!!  GRRR  I just lost my entire post.  Dog Gonnit anyway!!  I will start over by saying i was put on my first diet at age 11.  I went to Nutri System.  I was the only kid there.  I was embarressed and humiliated.  I have 6 brothers no sisters my brothers dont have weight problems.  My mom isnt suportive for me having this surgery.  She feels if I would just eat right i wouldnt have any problems.  The thing is I do eat a really healthy diet and i am not gaining but i am not loosing either.  I have done weight watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutri System, TOPS,, Low carb, Low fat you name it i have tried it.  I have decided to have surgery most likely RNY.  I am interviewing like crazy and have been offered jobs that have insurance that covers surgery.  I have been reading this OH site for the past 3 weeks.  I just finally got the courage to read through the memorial sites.  It was hard to read these excited posts of people just like me they are all counting down to that specific date only never to return to the boards for their update.  Instead we got a heart broken spouse of mother of father or sister.  So very sad.  You just never know what will happen.  I feel i have found a safe surgeon.  I havent met him but he has come highly recommended from various people.  Dr. Tersigne is the surgeon I have chosen at least I am pretty sure.  Like I said I haven't met him yet but  His infection rates are very low as well as general problems.  He hasnt lost a patient yet.  He is also Morman like me so its nice to know that we are both praying to the same heavenly father.  I will have to travel 4 hours from home for him but I dont mind.  

I do have another option though.  Tomorrow I am suposed to go to OHSU for a research study group that i was chosen for.  It is for the VOD i think is the name.  It is an electrical stimulator that zaps your stomach into thinking it is full.  The surgery is alot easyer and the recovery is quick as well.  I am not sure about the total weight loss.  Also it is a 5 year commitment.  They pay for everything but again I am not sure it is what i am suposed to do.  If it doesnt work that is 5 years more of being fat.  If i do the RNY and have complications and dont have a stomach anymore I will be bummed.  I have been praying for guidence to make the right choice for me.   It is tuff.  I have a wonderfull suportive husband and 6 great kids.  

I need to wrap this up i have been sick with stomach flu and Riley my 4 year old had her tonsils out last week and it has been long nights with her in pain.  Poor baby.  It is spring break this week.  Well i will write more again.  I hope to be having surgery by my birthday in Sept.  That is my goal anyway.  If anyone reads this and knows about the vod i would love to know more.  Bye for now Chris