CeiliKid

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One year ago this morning I was prepping for my surgery. I was waking up afterwards confused and not really sure if I'd already been through surgery. Then I don't remember anything until I woke up in the room I'd stay the night in. Pain came, the epidural didn't seem to be helping much so eventually I was switched to a morphine pump. The nurse must have been busy because she didn't get me up to walk at all that night (she said I was resting so peacefully but I just think they were shorthanded).
I spent the next month in and out of the hospital with some complications. I then spent the next three months in pain and enduring a deep depression where I didn't know if I was going to live. It seemed that food was my worst enemy.

Then one day I embraced my surgery and realized I had made it and I would continue to make it.

I've now lost a total of 127 pounds in just a year. I have 23 more pounds to lose to get to my ultimate goal of 142.

Life is good now and I'm enjoying my freedom from the weight. I can't stop looking at myself and that sounds vain but I don't care. I am amazed by what I see. 

Many people celebrate something big by going out and drinking or having a feast. I haven't had a drink in a year (not that I miss it at all, although I am not banning it from my new diet whatsoever) and feasting is not a word that passes my lips any longer. So today, I am celebrating my 1 year "surgiversary" by fasting. HA! That sounds so strange. But I am fasting in honor of the first day that I couldn't and wouldn't eat. I am fasting in remebrance of the permanent thing I did to my body and also in remembrance of how I never want to get fat again and I never want to go through the physical and emotional pain especially that I went through the first few months after surgery. I am fasting in honor of the knowledge that I don't feel the hunger all the time now and can actually go for a long period of time without the need to stuff my face.  I am fasting in honor and thanks to God for sparing me and walking through this whole ordeal with me. It was no small feat and I couldn't have possibly have done it on my own.

Today I am fasting. Today I am living. Today I am thankful. Today I am me.

I have collar bones! They're beautiful if I do say so myself...and I DO!

Weight loss has definitely slowed down now, but so has my hair loss (woohoo!).

I was unable to post my 8 month photo and blog due to a family death and a huge family emergency in addition to that.
I posted my 9 month photo - please forgive how wrinkly the dress is, it's a hand me down that I haven't been able to press yet but I had to snap a picture as soon as I tried it on. Now that pink dress is a size too big so unless I take it to have altered I won't be wearing it (but how pretty is it?).

I have about 35 - 37 pounds to lose until I get to goal.
I'll officially be the thinnest girl in my family on Christmas morning (just in time for matching pajamas)!

I don't much get sick anymore - I'm very careful with my food. In fact two nights ago I went to TGI Friday's for the first time since 2 weeks before my surgery. I didn't have a single bite of the nachos OR vanilla bean cheesecake (my two favorites). Instead I ordered the grilled mahi mahi. I had to send it back because it was just too tough. I had a chicken ceasar salad in the fridge at home so I just drank some water while my family finished up their meals (they eat so fast that I hardly had to sit there at all).

My absolute favorite thing to eat is Cottage Cheese Pancakes for breakfast. I do need to work on drinking more protein shakes. That will help curb my hunger (yes, it's back a little). 

I've never been this close to my goal before, it's amazing to think of that AND to think of how far I've come in less than a year!
For my anniversary my husband bought me a gift certificate to White House Black Market which I've always said would be the store I'd shop at when I got to my goal weight. It won't be long now!

Oh I almost forgot to mention: We recently had a birthday party for my son and most of the people there had not seen me since last year and didn't know about my surgery - I am not joking when I say people didn't recognize me. They actually had to ask: "Is this Ceili?"
They were in shock. What a great feeling!

I'm 7 months out and have lost about 104 pounds. I'm working my way into a size 12 (skipped right through size 14) and feeling pretty dang good. 

I still get cravings for food but they usually go as fast as they come. Knowing I can't eat pizza and burgers galore really really helps curb those cravings.
If I want pizza, then I maybe I'll have some turkey pepperoni instead.
And besides that, I'm just not that hungry anymore which is a miracle.

I made a sinfully delicious dessert this week that should be banned from any sort of diet but get this, it's sugar free!
It's called a Molten Chocolate Cake and my husband loved it as well. 

I've also discovered MorningStar food products which are veggie based. The protein count is really up there for their products. 
I still live off chicken though and salads from Wendy's and ChickFilA are perfect. 

I've just started shopping in the regular clothing section and not the plus size section. Now that we are going to be heading into fall I'll need some new clothes, it's going to be exciting not to have to shop in plus size.

Since I've lost so much hair and I'm still losing I got a new haircut that I think really flatters me. My husband likes it as well so I think I'll keep it for awhile. 

I'm out of the 190's feeling pretty good and life seems to be balancing out now. I'm really excited!

I am 6 months and 1 week out from surgery and as of TODAY I am a member of the Century Club. I am 100 pounds down from my highest weight!
I have exactly 50 more pounds to go until I'm at my personal goal and satisfied.
Don't get me wrong, I am very satisfied now but don't stop me now!

To celebrate Century Club and Wonderland I have a couple of things planned. I am going to start taking Ballroom Dance lessons and I am going to get a heavy bag (probably in the fall) so that I can box in my garage. I found that I really enjoy boxing.

In late May I had to buy some new skinny clothes. Well those are my fat clothes now. It's getting close to the time to go shopping again.

Gosh right now I just am not sure of what to say here. I can't believe this major accomplishment. My father-in-law said that I was an inspiration. I think I'll just enjoy that compliment the rest of the day!

I'm in ONEDERLAND!
It happened Monday morning, I got back from a week long vacation to find out that I currently weigh 199.

It's so wonderful to set realistic weight goals for myself and reach them. I don't remember the last time I didn't weigh in the 200 area.

In fact when I met my husband over 8 years ago I told him I weighed 180 but in reality I weighed closer to 220. He still doesn't know about that one!

I haven't been able to wear my wedding rings in awhile because they are too big. Everything on me is getting smaller. I've lost 93 pounds from my highest weight and 76 pounds since surgery. To reach my ultimate long term goal I have 54 more pounds to lose. I can't believe I've lost over half the weight I needed to.

Ahhhh I can breathe!

I'm about a week over my 5 month mark. I am doing very well these days. I still get sick (trying new foods and such) about every 2 weeks but I've never experienced dumping syndrome so far.

I'm in a 16/18 now and I can really see a difference - finally!
Sugar Free / Fat Free / Low Carb foods actually don't taste so bad (after a month of NOT eating I guess your tastes change.

I've been doing quite a bit of traveling and getting my protein in during those times has been very easy particularly because I plan ahead of time and take a lot of foods with me that I order from bariatriceating.com.
Then when we go out for dinner I'm always able to find a chicken or fish dish and if that fails then I can always go to Wendy's for chili.
Chicken is my main staple these days and I can't seem to get enough of it, I want it at every meal. I've always liked chicken and I'm thrilled that my new pouch is tolerating it well.

I pushed myself in exercising today and I went further and faster than I ever have before, that felt good in itself but I also took notice of how my body physically felt while walking/running. It felt lighter, it flowed, my legs didn't rub quite so much, I could hold a conversation if I wanted to.

I saw a friend last week that I hadn't seen since way before surgery. She said, "What did you lose 200 pounds!?"
Nope, "just" 89.

I cannot believe I've lost almost 100 pounds now, and sooner than I lose 100, I'll be in Onederland and my gracious that will be phenominal. I'm trying to think up ways to celebrate, I'm considering getting a pedicure (never had one) and changing my hairstyle.

Speaking of hair - mine's gone. I'm pretty sure that 5 pounds of my weight loss has been from my hair falling out. I've always been very fortunate to have a lot of hair (thin but a lot). Nobody can tell how much I've lost but eesh it's awful. I'd like that to stop now.

New pictures uploaded.

I did not have a chance to update this month but I will in a few weeks for my 5 month update and pictures.
I've lost over 80 pounds now and there are some noticeable differences. I'm wearing a size 18 instead of 24 and bra size has decreased considerably.
More in a few weeks!

Updated with pics again.
My clothes are fitting differently, I haven't bought any new ones yet, sorry to say but I feel like I look exactly the same as I did nearly 3 months ago.
I'm 64 pounds down though. I'm feeling a great deal better these days. I'm not vomitting (much) and my abdomen is feeling better although still tender.
Some of the easiest foods for me to eat is Wendy's Chili and Ricotta with Strawberry Preserves.
I've been cleared to try any food now but I'm very hesitant. I've been making some good meals that I can eat along with the whole family. 
I probably won't be updating again until late May as my family and I will be taking a very long vacation. I'm very nervous about food, the place we are going will have a lot of German food. My husband and son love German food but me not so much (even though my Grandma was Pennsylvania Dutch). I'm not sure what I'm going to find to eat, but I'm sure we can always find a Wendy's!

Updated with pics (I'll do this each month I think). I can only see a very small difference but I can tell the difference in my shirts and also my engagement ring is no longer wearable. I'm going to safely put it away until I through with most of the weight loss and then I'll get it resized.

I have been doing much better since my EGD and have only thrown up a couple of times since then. I got sick on Big Train pancakes the other day, Lucille (my pouch) just isn't ready for breads.
Low fat crackers are good though.

I've lost 57 pounds now and I'm looking forward to all the things I'll be doing this spring and summer like a trip to Georgia, the beach, New York City (Grease is on Broadway!), and possibly Maryland.

My husband got a new job with a great company and he starts next week. It might lead to us moving to the other side of town in a year or so. Which would be better all around as most of our lives revolve on the West End.

I still have rough days and I think I've pulled a muscle somewhere near the incision and it's made things slow going.
But on those rough days I've reminded myself to "keep my eye on the prize" and that is buying a beautiful outfit from a store I've never been able to shop in, be healthy, keep up with my son, get back on the stage.
So in the meantime I'm going to do everything I need to do to get myself back to performing. I haven't been on the stage in over ten years, it's time to reinvent myself.

I am 5 weeks out now and boy have I been through the ringer but I admit gleefully that today is a good day.

I have now lost 42 pounds (from my highest and according to my scale). 

The last two weeks food and liquids were hurting as they went down and I was foaming or spitting up a lot. I began vomitting at least once a day. Last week I went to my 1 month post op appt. and I vomitted from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m.  I went to the ER and they had to admit me. The next morning I had an EGD (didn't feel a thing after I "went to sleep"). Immediately I felt better. I was on liquids that day. The next day I moved to soft foods and now I'm trying new foods on my Phase 2 list (tuna salad, egg salad, crab salad, turkey). 

I went for a walk with my son and I am able to return to most of my household duties. I will say that by the end of the day the area around my incision hurts so I have to take it a bit easier. I'm moving out of a depressed state and beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
One thing I noticed is that I'm having difficulty with bowel movements. Today is the 4th day that I've not had one and I'm eating plenty of solid foods and oatmeal so things should be moving but they aren't. I'm afraid I'll have to use a suppository and that makes me nervous because the last time I did that I was up all night with terrible cramping, the worst ever and nothing much came out!

I will follow up later today or tonight with some pictures if I can.