CecilliaE411

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Well I weighed at 164.5 this morning and I'm so excited!! I set myself a new goal for  a 10 lbs. weight loss to get ne closer to my 140 lb. goal. I am officially 8 1/2 mos. post op! and feeling so great... the only complaint is all this loose skin!! I hate it... I feel un-comfortable and am looking into plastic surgury... I want to get to my 140 lb. goal and maintian my weight for a bit before I get a procedure done... I want a tummy tuck... or a lower body lift... ??? and I'd love to get my boobs done...  Well I am staying strong and not understanding why some friends that have always been your friends don't say a word about your weight loss... they aren't even close to me anymore..???? its so weird.. I'm still the same crazy, silly girl I have always been... I haven't changed one single bit... I promised myself that when I got the procedure done *Gastric Bypass... but when me and my friends joke about fat jokes and all that kind of stuff.... they seem to get offended.... ????  Sometimes I feel like I'm lost.... I still feel like that 311 pound girl I was at one time... the only time I really feel different is when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and realize just how different I look.... but I'm still me..?????  I am wearing a size 11 at this time... I love it!!! and even though I still have a ways to get to my 140 lb. goal... about 24 lbs still to lose.. I am finally feeing so normal!

Thanks for you guys support!! I need all that I can get....

Cece

  So here I am 6 1/2 months out from surgery and I weighed this morning ... 175.0 !! Whooo Whoo...! so excited... I'm almost there... My goal is to be 145-150!!  My heaviest weight was 311 lbs and I am down 80 lbs since I had the surgery!!! so I'm ALMOST THERE!!!   Well here's the scoop!!! I went to the carnival for the first time in a long time and it was AMAZING!!! When I was in the 9th grade I got on the Zipper and the man could barely even shut the door to it...... He had to try several times because of my size I was toooo big...... I remember feeling embarrased and ashamed of being so big so young...   I never rode another ride at a carnival besides the tilt a whirl... (because I knew ANYONE could fit in that ride) ever again.... Here I am 31 years old and I rode EVERY DAMN RIDE THERE WAS.....!!!! I rode so many rides my shoulders were bruised from hanging upside down and the backs of my legs were bruised from holding on for dear life....  LoL!!! I had a blast!!! I felt WONDERFUL... and I 'll never go back to being that fat girl again... She died at that carnival!!! I felt it when I was up in the air being spun around ... I felt that fat girl die...and I almost felt like I was free from all the chains I carried all of my life.....  and at that moment... I don't think I've ever been happier.....!  I'm outgoing and happy, and ready for whatever.... I've been working out 5 times a week and pushing my water like crazy... I eat low fat...and try not to go over 20 grams of fat a day... but fit'n in lots of low fat protein like grilled chicken and shrimp!!!! I'm so excited!!! about the new me... and even though I'm learning more and more about myself everyday... I'm actually pretty happy now... !!! Going through this break-up with the father of my youngest can make me depressed at times... well let me admit it... ALL THE TIME... so instead of eating.... I'm working out like crazy!!! when I get out there and walk and jog and play racket ball, and run up and down bleachers..... It takes it all away ... even for just a little bit... then I sleep so well at night.....!!! Exercise is the key to un-happiness.... :)  I just wanted to share this with you guys..... I'm ganna post sum pics too... so thanks for the support from you guys!!!    MuAh!!!

Okay so here I am at 25 weeks post op and I weighed this morning and the scale read...... 179.5 !!! Whooo Whooo!  I am so extatic.... I've been dieting for about 2 weeks now and hitting the gym up at least 5 times a week... I feel so refreshed when I work out.... I'm not the biggest hippo in the gym anymore and that alone makes working out fun! I've attained some new goals! and my first Goal for now is to lose another 10 pounds and get to 169 before I go back to the Dr. in a couple of weeks.... I'm having faith that I can do it... As far as diet goes, I've been eating LOW FAT! major... and eating lots of empty calories at night like Tomatoe... which I absolutely love and Kosher Pickles, Whole Wheat Pretzels... and Baked chips with Salsa....  I'm really focused on getting to my goal of 150 and I'm almost there!!! I can eat a half of a grilled chicken sandwhich with honey mustard!!  and as of today... I have absolutley no regrets... As far as hair loss.. well of course its thinned some but nothing I can't handle... I'm NOT doing well on my protein shakes but I'm getting in alot more meat than I could before I just choose grilled chicken and shrimp!! mmmm Yummy! I feel great and I look forward to losing more weight!!! I'm drinking most of my water and staying completely away from cokes!!!! its major important not to consume all those Calories in just a drink!!!  Well as far as alcohol consumption goes, I drink almost every weekend!! Reason being I've been going out like crazy because I ended a 4 year relationship with my youngest childs father... I feel refreshed about my decision and look forward to finding someone who will treat me like I should have been treated all along!!  When I go out I'm drinking Bacardi and diet Coke... its not too bad, and does the job fast...LoL! I also drink Grey Goose and water... I know it sounds yucky but there's no calories OR Carbonated water in Water...LoL!!!  I got asked to the movie last night by a friend I've been talking to for a while... so I'm a little nervous about it... but I'll be fine... I'm stoked about my future!!! and getting motivated to QUIT partying so much and finish my 4 classes and get my masters degree!!! Whoo Whoo!!!
Well thats my little update!!! I'm happy, light and FREE as a bird!!!

Much Love!!
Cece

Hey you guys! I'm back to give an update on my weight loss. Well I'm officially 21 weeks post op and feeling great!  and I weighed this morning and I'm at 185 which makes 70lbs. that I've lost since surgury September 14, 2009. I think emotionally I've gone through a lot these past few months, and sometimes I get discouraged about not being able to enjoy certaini foods, but EVERY sacrafice has been worth it. I don't know if losing 70 lbs in 5 months is normal, sometimes I feel like the weight is coming off so slow... and when I see other people's pages they've lost 120 lbs by this time.. so Sometimes I get a little discouraged, but I'm happy with the amount of weight I've lost and ready to REALLY kick it up a notch with exercise and my water. As far as my body goes.... Its a disaster. I have so much loose skin on my arms and stomach, that I make my self disgusted.. I know it will only get worse before it will ever get better but I hope I can be confident enough to be "happy" within myself until I can actually arrange for some body contouring. (waaaayyyy down the line) My new goal is 20 more pounds which I hope I lose quickly this last month although sometimes I swear my weight doesn't budge for a couple of weeks. I'll stay the same for a week or two, then I'll lose 2 pounds.. here and there... so I def. need to workout!! I think I'm a little depressed... I recently OFFICIALLY ended a 4 year relationship with the father of my youngest who is 1, and even though I know its for the best, I still feel so alone... I feel like it really is ME AGAINST THE WORLD... Just me and my Kiddos.... which is all I REALLY need but I'm just going through the motions and trying to pick up the pieces to my heart  and life which was shattered by a controlling, abusive and HORRIBLE man has finally "defeated" me... I thought to myself this morning, how I "used to be......." how Independent and successful and strong... and at that very moment I felt the weakest I'd ever felt in my entire life... Like life had no meaning for me anymore... I'll get through this... I know I will.... its just ganna take a little time........

On a positive note... I went out this past Saturday with a cousin and a friend .... like usual I gave the bartender my debit card to start my tab and ordered a Vodka with Cranberry juice... Ordinarily my tab would have been anywhere from $40 to $60 smackaroos.... but .....Well just put it like this... by the end of the night my total was $5.00 .. LoL! I had so many drinks bought for me I was throwing them away and sippin on the "fresh" one... LoL!  I didn't drink too much.... I don't know why but I NEVER get drunk...No matter how much I drink... Its so weird... so I just usually sip a little bit....  The funny thing about that night was I walked up to the bar with my cousin and I saw this familiar face... It was my 7th grade crush... OH MY GOD.. I don't think I have ever been infatuated with a guy in my life like I was with him.. (Gabriel).. LoL! He was one of the most popular guys in school.. He was WAY TOO CUTE to ever be with me... CHUBBY WHUBBY!! As I walked up.. He kind of checked me out... and he said.. "What are you drinking on?" and when I told him he quickly asked the bartender to get my drink.....  I was shocked out of this world!!! the boy I dreamed about BOUGHT ME A DRINK.... LoL! I told him thanks as we chatted for a minute... and then he asked me what I was doing later and gave me his number so we could "kick it"  Bahahahaha!   Well needless to say I didn't call him that night.. nor will I ever.... I just think it felt nice to actually get hit on, by someone I used to like so much!!!  (I know Imma sexy lil thang now... LoL!)
 
I have alot to be thankful for, and sometimes I lose sight of whats really important and focus soley on the bad... I'm happier without Eric... Its just hard letting go of bad habits.... I know that there is someone out there that will treat me right... I just need to be patient and enjoy the single life a little... I have some of the best friends in the whole world, and family that cares so much for me... I have the best 3 hansome little BoyZ in the entire world....  and my life has "just begun"....

Update: Starting weight: 255 and weigh in today 185!!! -70 lbs.
Goal: start exercising 4 times a week and DRINK MY WATER!!!!

Ya see... everytime I write on this darn OH I feel better... LoL!
I'm ganna post some new pics up this week!!!

Cece

Well you guys... Here I am at 11 Weeks Post op.. and I swear it feels like longer.... But I'm excited to announce that I am down 54 lbs! I could hardly believe my eyes when the scale read 200.5 which means I'm like a pound from being out of the 2 hundreds and in OneDerLand!!!!! Yaaay! I almost cried when I saw the scale because for like 3 weeks the scale barely even moved and this week I lost like 11 pounds....  Which felt great.... As far as eating goes... I can't eat much of anything... but I have a wider variety of things I can at least "taste"....  My spirits are up and I'm sooo Excited to start working out.... The bad news is ... I got laid off from my job and I was here almost 3 years... The State of New Mexico is Broker than a Mother... The Recession has effected the entire State!!! But As each door closes.... Another one opens... and thats how I have to look at things.... At least I'm grateful that my Insurance covered 100% of my Surgery besides the Co-Pays which totaled out to be like 700 smackaroos!!! I'm blessed and grateful... and looking forward to a new beginning..... oh yeah... me and my boyfriend... (the father of my youngest child) have decided to work things out... we were seperated for like 3 1/2 months... (the longest ever!!) and He realized just how much "we" meant to him... so who knows??? We'll see.... As for right now... I'm so HAPPY and Life couldn't be better!!! I can't wait to get down to 180... which is my next goal... and I'm closer than I have EVER BEEN!!!
Well you guys... Thanks so much for all the support.... I'll keep you updated on "me"!!!  I'm losing weight and feeling Great!!! LoL!

Well... Here I am 7 wks post op and feeling like CRAP!!!   I've lost some weight but not a whole lot..... (Nothing to brag on yet).  38 lbs. which is a really good thing... but I've just been feeling horrible these past few weeks... I never realized how much I relied on food to make me happy... and going through a break up with my 1yr. olds father... has taken more than a "toll" on me and my life..... I used to have Food to get me through... and on the weekends I had alcohol... (which worked wonders....) but now.... BAAAH! NADA!!!  I have to deal with everything on my own.... (like your supposed to...) and its frusterating... I feel like I still can't eat much..... my stomach hasn't stretched "what-so-ever" and it seems like I can't move up to meats of any kind... because I'll BARF!!!!  The protein is FRICKEN HORRIBLE AND DISGUSTING!!! and every day I'm living with the thoughts that I'm ganna lose ALL MY DAMN HAIR... so its constant guilt..... I guess I'm just feeling Crappy because I ate a tiny little bit at lunch and I've thrown up twice already..... and feel like throwing up again...  I feel like my health has gone down hill... because EVERYTHING makes me nautious....... BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH..... I'm getting depressed I can feel it...... I'm lucky enough to have my best friend Jesika by my side... going through the same thing with me.... we tend to take turns barfing !!! LoL! but it just seems like people don't understand "my" situation... and its too exhausting trying to explain myself .. over and over and over again......  So there's my BiTcH for the day... and it feels good to let out my anxieties ..... actually... I'm feelin a little better..... LoL!  But on the brightside of things...... I'm actually doing great... and losing weight at my own speed.....  The weights not just melting off of me... like I imagined... but I'm trying to set new goals to work out because that seems to really help.....  I went to Halloween Party as a Sexy Naughty Cop... LoL! and It was a blast.... I had 2 drinks with Vodka and CranGrape light... (my very first time to drink....) and although I felt guilty for drinking... because my Dr. advised me to wait 1 year.... (Fricken A')  LoL!  I didn't overdue it.... and it went down smoother than food does..... thats for sure.... At least I didn't give in to drinking a Beer..... Damn... Its been a while since I had an ice cold beer.... (look at me sounding like an alcoholic)... LoL! I'm far from that..... but it kind of felt good to actually be a little bit normal.... and know my limits and not overdue it!!!!  I guess God doesn't give us anything we can't handle.... so I'll try to look up on the bright side of things....
Love you guys!!!!
and please excuse my BiPolar Episode!! LoL!

 Okay Soooo... I have had a horrible time of trying to drink this CrAp they call Protein!!! I've tried cheap protein, I've tried 50.00 Protein, different flavors, different kinds, added Banana.... The List goes on and on...... I fricken Hate It!!! I gag with every drink and I usually get a nasty stomach ache too...  So I saw this Grape Bullet (New-Whey Liquid Protein) that said 42 grams of Protein, 0 suger, and 0 fat.. I thought I'd try it since I haven't taken protein in a couple of days like I should... I added it to my Bottled water with Grape Welch's Suger Free powder packet and a hint of 100% Dole Pineapple Juice.... OMG! It tasted wonderful... you can't even taste the protein WHAT-SO-EVER!!!!  I know they are a little Pricey ... about $3.00 a bullet... But they are worth every penny.... I mean who puts a price tag on how important your HAIR IS!??? LoL  So I'm officially in love...  and if you have a hard time drinking those Nasty Shakes ... This just may be a resolution.... I know its mine....!

Talk to ya guys later!!!

Cece

 Hey everyone!! I just thought I 'd update a little bit about my progress!!! Well first of all I'll start off by saying I'm doing great!!!! Physically I'm doing much better and now that I'm able to put Banana in my Protein shake.... (yummmy) I'm able to sloop em' down a little easier...LoL! Well I went to the Dr. on 9/23/09 and had lost 18.5 lbs. in one week and 2 days!!! Yaay! and my Dr. allowed me more items on my food list like: Cream of Wheat, Oatmeal, Sugar Free Pudding, 1 egg, creamed soups, and 1 slice of wheat toast. So I was extremely excited about that! I've been taking ALL of my vitamins!! even the Gross Flinstones chewables each day! The only place I need improvement is the exercise... I feel like after work... I'm SOOO EXHAUSTED... its horrible!!! but my plan is to go swimming tonight with my sister and walk and swim daily!!! My lifes so busy right now though.... I am a single mom of 3 kiddos... and my youngest is 1... So between diapers and Football!!!, and Working full time.... and then of course I've got School!!! Working on a Masters Degree!!! so Damn People... I'm a Busy Woman.... But Exercise has to go to the top of my list.... and I've got to keep drinking my shakes!!!

Well everyone.... I appreciate ALL your support!!!

Love AlwayZ

Cece

I'm back again and feeling "alright" I'm getting this tremendous tight feeling in my chest when I breath in and still having alot of pain... Until I take my Liquid Loritab, then I feel great.. (hehehe) but seriously.. even ice make my chest tight and I'm burping so much....!!! Is this normal.. I've also noticed for the past 2 nights that I've had a temperature of 99.5 or so and yesterday I had a HORRIBLE migraine... I'm feeling good as of right now...  Don't get me wrong.. I'm  glad that I'm safe n sound in my bed, but i still find myself having a temptation to eat or snack al little.... I Didn't do all that great on my strawberry protein shake today... so tomorrow my goal is my water and my protein shakes... now that I'm finally home and able to focus on "Me"...  I realize now.. that food made me happy... but being thinner will make me even more happier.. so I'll just have to roll with the punches and be strong...  Can't wait to see some results.. and i have a Doctors appointment next wednesday... Yuck.. another trip to El Paso.. about 4 hrs. away from where I live... But thats okay... I'm still going through the pain and soon, I'll be all better..!
Thanks you guys for your support!
Muah!
Cece