caroline75

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I went to Austin today for another fill. He put another .2 cc's in, so I now have a total of 3.5 cc's in my band. I'm noticing a little more tightness, but not much, which is good. I'm so afraid to be too tight!
While I was there I asked if they would take my measurements, since I have no idea what they were and how many inches I've lost. They said they usually do it at a year, and since I'm almost there, they'd do it. So, here are my "stats".
Neck: 14.5/13  -1.5"
Upper Arm:  16/15  -1"
Chest: 48/43  -5"
Waist: 49.5/41  -8.5"
Wrist: 6.5/6  -.5"
Hips: 58/49  -9"
Thigh: 29/26  -3"
Calf: 19/16  -3"
Ankle: 10/9   -1"
So, if I added correctly, I've lost 32.5" in almost a year, 84 pounds, and my BMI has gone from 44 to 32.1. I guess I have a lot to be proud of.
This surgery has changed my life- for the better. I'm so grateful I was able to get it, I don't know where I would be if I didn't.

I have now lost 83-84 pounds. It depends on what day I weigh myself. I'm going to Austin on Thursday for another fill. I need a little tweak. Lately I've been able to eat more again and have been able to eat faster, which isn't good.

I went shopping on Saturday, only to leave depressed and unhappy. I've lost so much weight and feel I should be able to fit into non women's sizes in shirts, but I can't, not just yet. But, I can fit into a 1X shirt instead of 3X, so that is progress. The only problem on Saturday was in the 1X shirt, the sleeves were so tight, it was cutting off circulation in my arms. So, it fits in the body, but not on my arms. I was really upset. Then, I tried on 16 misses jeans- which fit around the waist, but are way too tight on my legs. My legs looked like sausages- not pretty. So, I got some 18 misses jeans, which are a little lose in the waist, but fit my legs. They're better than my Lane Bryant size 18s- in those I look like I'm wearing a dirty saggy diaper, they're so baggy in the butt and the crotch- so at least these fit better. I was just hoping by now, I'd see better results in clothing.

I was telling some co-workers about the sleeve thing- and they said they have the same problem and think it's the style of shirts now- so that made me feel better. They're skinny.

I'm just having a pity party, and I shouldn't be. I know I've come a long long way.

I've been on a plateau the last 2 weeks. Can't get past 79 pounds down. I always seem to stall out on the 9's. Oh well.
I started walking this week. I walked yesterday and burned 279 calories and again today and burned 326 calories. Hopefully this will help get me over the hump.

I'm down 76 pounds now. I have about 43 left that I want to lose. 54 more to get to what my recommended weight is. But I haven't weighed that little since Jr. High, so I think that may be a bit unrealistic. When I see how far I've come in 9 months, my goals don't seem so unobtainable.
I need a new wardrobe, but I'm trying to make what I have last awhile longer. I only have about 5 shirts for work that fit, a few T-shirts for weekends, 4 pairs of pants and 2 pairs of jeans. That's my wardrobe right now.
People at work keep asking what my weight loss secret it. I feel guilty.
We were at IHOP the other day, and the lady at the table next to us started asking why I wasn't eating much and telling me she felt ashamed about what she ate after seeing my plate. She was a table away. I wanted to tell her to mind her own business, I thought she was being really rude. I just smiled and tried to be polite.

I had my 5th fill in Austin last Thursday. He put in .3 cc's, so I think my total now is 3.3 cc's. My eating is really restricted now. On Saturday we picked up Chick-fil-a for lunch since we were in a hurry to get home and get ready for our housewarming party. I used to be able to eat an 8 or 12 piece nugget meal, coleslaw and waffle fries- sometimes even large sizing it. On Saturday I ordered a 6 piece kids meal. I had 3 nuggets and 2 waffle fries, and a bite of coleslaw, and that's all I could eat. Big difference.

My total weight loss now is 69 pounds. The scale was stuck for a couple of weeks, but this fill has helped it move again! It's been 35 weeks since surgery- avg. loss 1.97 pounds per week.

The most difficult part of this experience for me has been mentally. It's hard not really having anyone to talk to about it who has been through it and experienced the same things I'm going through. I have my friend Katie here, and we talk, but we don't see each other that often. There are online communities, which help, but it's not the same as talking face to face about it. It's also hard because most people don't know I've had it done, so I feel like I'm keeping a huge secret from them. It's weird going out to eat with them, and all of the skinny people woof down their food and I eat slow and have tons left over. I can see them looking at me and then looking at their plates and I can almost imagine what they're thinking in their heads. It's been a weird journey. But a good one.

Well, I am now down 60.3 pounds. It's been 25 weeks since I have the surgery, so on average, I'm losing 2.4 pounds per week. Of course, most of that loss was probably at the beginning, it seems now that I've gotten the latest fill, I'm probably losing a pound per week. And there was a time in there where I kept losing and gaining the same few ounces.
I'm still happy with it- still no regrets about my decision.
I don't really see the weight loss in myself. I notice it in my shoulders, and I notice my collarbone being more pronounced, but as far as the rest of me goes, I still think I look the same. I'm sure I don't, but it's funny how our self perception is.
I feel different. I have a little more energy, I was able to run the other night to escape the rain, and I ran pretty far, pretty fast and I didn't get winded. I notice it when I cross my legs- it's easier and my 2 legs fit closer together. I notice it when laying on my side at night. I notice it in the way my clothes fit. I feel the differences, but I don't see the differences.
I was worried about getting through the holidays. There was always so much food around. At times, I would wish I could still eat like I used to and really stuff myself with all the good food. In the same thought, I would thank God that I couldn't. I was the only one who wasn't totally stuffed and bloated after eating, which was nice. I did miss my usually champagne toast at New Years. I had a small glass and took 1 tiny sip, but that was it.
I need to take some new pictures soon. I don't think I've taken any since October!

I went to Austin today for my 4th fill. Another .5 cc's- total of 3 cc's now.

I've been trying to find a doctor here in Houston that will do my fills- and I'm not having much luck. Most doctors will not treat people who were banded by other doctors- I guess there's a lot of liability there. I called 4-5 doctors and was told they will not do fills on people who were banded elsewhere. I then called my doctor's office in Austin and asked if there was anything they could do to help me because I couldn't find anyone here. The called allergan (formerly inamed) the maker of the band to get a recommendation and called me back with the info. I called the doctor's office they recommended and was told they would CONSIDER taking me on, but first I'd have to send them a copy of my operative report and then get an upper GI that they'll review. If they then decide to take me as a patient, I'd have to pay $200 for the fills. Right now in Austin I'm paying $50. If I still had my old insurance, it would be free. I don't know if I should just stay with my doctor in Austin, or switch. It's a pain and it's expensive to switch. BUT it's a hassle taking half days off work and driving to Austin, getting a fill and driving back. It's about 6 hours in the car in one day and it's exhausting.
Decisions, Decisions.

In other news, I have my 4th fill scheduled for next Thurs.- so I'm taking my floating holiday off work and going to Austin. A fun day of being in the car forever. I hope I'll get some more restriction- and I really hope I'll be at my sweet spot. We'll see. I'm noticing I really have to pay attention to chewing and to what I eat. If I eat too fast it really hurts. I have pain the most when I eat sandwiches, flour tortillas, and potatoes (other than mashed).

I've lost 54 pounds so far. The weight loss has been much slower the last couple of months.

All in all, I'm still really happy with how this is going- and don't have any regrets (except maybe that I didn't get banded in Houston!)

People are starting to notice I've lost quite a bit of weight. It feels good that it's finally noticable, but with that come the questions of how I'm doing it. It's hard to answer them. I mean, I just say I'm watching what I eat and eating less, but then come more questions- Are you exercising? Are you following a program? How much have you lost? How long has it taken you? How do you not get hungry? Etc. Etc. I try to answer as honestly as possible, leaving out the main reason- I had surgery. I just don't want everyone to know- it's not really anyone's business. And people are judgemental about it- one lady who was asking about my weight loss starting going off about people who have surgery and it's just not right and the only way to lose weight is by diet and exercise. She was talking about someone who works in our building and how she had surgery and looks terrible now. I don't want people talking about me that way. I feel dishonest, especially when it's people who are also wanting to lose weight asking me how I'm doing it. But I guess that's just the way it has to be.

I went to Austin yesterday for my 3rd fill. He put in another .5 cc's of saline. I think that makes a grand total of 2 cc's. I've lost track. Anyway, according to their scale, I'm down 45 pounds. According to mine this morning, I'm down 51 pounds. For the last couple of weeks, I had been gaining and losing the same pound over and over again. And I had been able to eat a lot more- a whole chicken breast plus rice, and I still felt hungry. This morning I got a breakfast taco for breakfast and I can feel the difference with the restriction. I'm having to eat much slower, and if it's too fast, it's painful. Hopefully this will help me get on track with losing again.