Brenda M.

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 Well, if anyone is noticing the dates on here, this is my first entry in about 4 years. Things became so routine, that I sort of forgot about this site, and everything felt "normal" to me. I realized recently, that in a way, I don't want to feel "normal" anymore. I want to remember that I have had this surgery, and that I am lucky....and that I also don't want to take advantage of my situation on any way and sabotage myself. After my last weigh in in 2003, I guess you could say the typical "honeymoon" phase was over. I have been hovering around my current weight for the last 2 years or so. The initial gain devistated me, but then I guess I just got used to it. Last summer (July 2006) I had a full abdomonoplasty and upper arm lift. It was very expensive, and I feel like I will be in debt the rest of my life for it. I just met with my plastic surgeon on Friday, and I was approved for some revisions to be done soon on my stomach and arms at the cost of only anesthesia. I am really looking forward to this....I want so badly to feel completed with all of this. It was in the last month that I really started getting angry and down with myself. I am now on "diet" again. A word I never thought I would use again.....but I have lost 9 pounds so far, so I feel good about it. Also just found out that there is a support group here in town, so I will be trying that out as well.

 It's been a long time since I have updated so I thought I would write something quick. I think its been about a year and a half post op for me, and I am down 149 pounds. It feels great. I am wearing a size 11 and I love the way I look.....except for the skin. I just had a consultation with a plastic surgeon about a tummy and arm tuck. I am not beginning a new battle with insurance so hopefully it will all work out ok, and I can get that removed before I am off of my parents insurance in May when I graduate.

I can't believe that I was being wheeled out of surgery exactly one year ago today. This makes it seem like it just happened yesterday. I am reminded in a variety of ways every day that I made the best decision I could have for myself to have this surgery. Now I am getting to the point where I am looking into plastic surgery to allow myself to feel like I have truly finished what ive started. I do think that I look good now...I mean hell, I even own a pair of pants now that are a size 12! I just hate that I cant even jog (even though I have the energy for it now) because the reminder of how I what I weighed a year ago flaps so hard it's extremely uncomfordable to jog or run. But extra skin aside, I am very happy, and I feel extremely lucky and blessed.

Deffinately been a while since I updated on here. Was struggling with a few issues since January, but am doing much better now. Starting to fit into some 14's now which feels so incredible I cant even begin to describe it. I am really anxious for the end of the semester so I can relax and start some real exercising!

7 months today and I am down 93 pounds. I also just started fitting into a size 18 pants which in its own way feels like a small miricle! I am also continuing to see a counselor and dietician which helps me a great deal.

Today has been exactly 6 months since my surgery. I am down 85 lb and I am very pleased with myself. I finally saw my surgeon for the first time since the summer just after Christmas, and he thinks I am doing fabulous. Other than the hair loss, I have nothing to complain about. I love my new life, I love my new positive attitude, and I love waking up every morning a much happier person that I was 6 months ago!

 5 months have passed now and things are going well for me. Other than the fact that I have just recently started loosing a lot of hair, I think I am doing great. Not exercising quite as much as I would like to, but seeing as how close I am to the end of the semester, time is a big issue. I truly feel happy with myself and everything I have accomplished. When I started, I was a size 28, and now I have lost 76 pounds, and am wearing a size 20. I am gaining a lot of confidence now and am even going to take a lifeguard certification course next semester and will hopefully be a lifeguard this summer. This is something I have always wanted to do, but never would have dreamed of actually going through with it until this surgery.

I can't believe it has been 4 months already. These days go by so fast. Everything is great with me. I am enjoying Curves and have been doing quite well with makng it over there 3 times a week. I still get compliments daily which helps so much. I even went dancing the other night without feeling embarassed about how I would look on the dance floor. It felt AMAZING!! I am also seeing a nutirtionist along with the councelor that I have been seeing every week which is helping a great deal. I still have a lot to learn in terms of emotional issues with food.

Happy 3 month anniversary to me! Things are good, what more can I say really? I had some bloodwork done here at the health services on campus, and other than being a little anemic, I am doing well....even with the protien! Weight loss is slowing a bit, but I am still very satisfied with it considering I haven't really started exercising yet! I know im being bad in that department, but I plan to join Curves for women this week and get going on that. I feel so much more confident now, I just love it! I think everyone around me is sensing the inner change in me as well as the outer one.

Well here I am and I can't believe it has been 2 months already. Things are going great. I am at school now, and with 43 less pounds to carry around, I have been holding my head a little higher. My school even let me have a refund for the board plan, so I make all my food in my dorm room (much easier and more cost efficiant). Something else really nice is the fact that I haven't thrown up once yet! I have had a few extremely upset stomachs where I wish I could have thrown up, but other than that, food is agreeing with me quite well. The only other things I have noticed is that I am still never hungry, and it feels like a huge chore to eat. I don't even crave any of my favorite foods of the past. Its been really nice. I am just so excited for the new me that is slowly emerging!