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So, here it is November 14th 2010. I had RNY on August 30,2010 and I am down about 61 lbs (I say about because my scales seem to be very different from my physician's). I'm having some issues right now with exercise and my body image. Let's start with the exercise. I'm exercising...just not as much as I should. For example: today I cleaned house and I got into it....bending, scrubbing, lifting, washing and swabbing....decent activity, but nowhere near the burn I needed and I just left it at that :(  I should have went walking and I should have done my push ups and sit ups but I didn't. It's like that a lot. I know what I need to do, but I don't do it and there's no excuse. I just need to work harder.

The  issues I'm having with body image is this: I truly cannot see a big difference. I see the numbers, yes, but looking at myself I don't see a big difference. I had my husband take pictures of me this evening and I compared them to some that I had from before and honestly there wasn't that big of a change! What am I doing wrong!?! am I eating too much? have I stretched my stomach? what is it? I try and I try to see it but I just can't. *SIGH* what am I doing wrong?

SO, here we are. I didn't think in a million years things would have progressed as quickly and painlessly as they have. I also did 't think I'd be having RNY either though. When I first started this journey I was dead set on the Lap Band. I just wasn't ok with the thought of rearranging my digestive system. The more and more I thought about it and the more I prayed about it, I felt that the RNY was the best option for me. I have quite a few morbidities I'd like rid of before they kill me, so yes I truly think this is the best route for me. In 6 days my life will completely change...hopefully for the better!! Am I nervous? not right now. I'm that type of person though...I can got all the way till the day of something and then the nerves kick in. I guess that's a good thing though cuz I would be crazy by now! Especially after the 2 weeks I've had! Anything that could happen has and it sucks.

My Mom and Dad are coming up to be with me a take care of me since my husband is out to sea. I'm really looking forward to them being here. I know that my Mom will help keep me on track the first little while :) I just wish that my husband could be here with me too. Also, I wish that my sister could be here...but I know she has a little one at home that needs her.

I'm tired so I'm gonna hit the hay sack.  Night All!

So, I went to my first appointment with the surgeon yesterday! I chose to go with Bon Secours Surgical Weight Loss Center and my surgeon (hopefully) will be Dr. Gregory Adams. My first impression of the guy was, "He doesn't seem too friendly," and that means a lot to me. I don't want to go to someone who is hateful and makes me feel like I'm not worthly of his kindness...but I found that Dr. Adams is really about getting down to business. (plus I eventually got him to laugh lol) I found out last week that the results of a thyroid ultrasound I had done showed I have a 1cm mass on the right side of my thyroid. So, I have an appointment for a thyroid scan on The 29th and 30th. Dr. Adams said he would have to find out the results before I can get a surgery date. Which is understandable, I just hate the thought of maybe (more than likely having to get the biopsy ) So, he told me I needed to get my medical records and then they would set up the tests and the appointments with the nutritionist and the psychologist and that I should be getting a call on Monday with the times!!!! 

The only thing that's bothering me is the psych evaluation. Don't ask me why..lol..it's just that psychologists make me nervous! and I've never even been to one! I guess it's just the thought that someone else is determining whether or not you're nutty...when you could be making perfect sense (in your mind) 

So, I had been writing in a personal diary ( which I still might do just for myself) but I figured I'd start telling my story to the world. If you've read "My Story" then you know I've been fat my entire life. I first started toying with the idea of WLS about 7 years ago, but decided that that was too drastic of a measure to lose weight. At that time, ya know, it was still sort of experimental and I just didn't think it was safe enough for me. So, I decided that I would try on my own 7 years later and losing and gaining the same 50 pounds over and over again, I decided enough is enough.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                I suppose I began my WLS journey about a month ago...that's when I really started putting my plan into motion. I had been researching for the past 7 years on the RNY and Lap Band procedures and then when I started hearing about the VGS and DS I realized those weren't for me. But anyways back on track with my plan lol...I decided that I would call my insurance company and do some online research to find out other people's dealings with the insurance. Then, I found a PCP and (after much research) made a reservation with Bon Secours Surgical Weight Loss Center.

I went to the seminar on Thursday June 17th and made my first appointment with the surgeon!!! And that happens on June the 24th!!!!! I am so pyched to get this going!  I will keep everyone posted on what happens at the surgeon's office.