E. Williams
Wow! It has been 6 months!
Jul 07, 2009
Wow! Where has the time gone? I can't believe that it has been 6 months since I made the best decision of my life to have the surgery. I just celebrated my 33rd birthday and what a beautiful birthday it was! I am down 75 lbs!
Look at God! I bless God daily for such a blessing that He afforded me! What an awesome God I serve! I feel great and continue to be grateful that I did it. I just got back from vacation and took an airplane. Now for all of us well endowed folks, we know how uncomfortable plane rides can be but I am happy to say that although it was not like sitting in a Lazy Boy chair it was more comfortable that my plane ride last summer!
This journey has been quite interesting! Although I am losing weight, I am losing from the top down. I have always been extremely hippy and continue to be. When I went to the doctor for my 6 month appointment, the nurse measured my hips and I have lost almost 10 inches from my hips. I thought the nurse was lying because when I look in the mirror, all I see is my hips that still are big. So I asked the nurse was she sure that I had lost that much. But she reassured me that the tape measure was not lying and neither was she!
Now don't get me wrong I have struggled these past 6 months because I still hate eating! What an overrated experience! Eating 80 grams of protein for me is liking pulling teeth!
My best friend is on my case on a daily basis reminding me to eat because honestly I am never hungry and have no desire to eat! But I know in order for me to lose more weight I have to eat!
I had lunch yesterday with one of my dear friends and she asked me had I been faithful in my journaling of this journey and of course I had to be honest and say that I have sucked at chronicling this journey. She reminded me that if I don't journal the journey as part of the ministry that God has entrusted to me, I may forget what he has brought me through.
I know I have to do better because this has been such a God thing that only He can get the glory for! Lord, how many ways can I say thank you for doing for me what I could not do for myself?
1 comment
Look at God! I bless God daily for such a blessing that He afforded me! What an awesome God I serve! I feel great and continue to be grateful that I did it. I just got back from vacation and took an airplane. Now for all of us well endowed folks, we know how uncomfortable plane rides can be but I am happy to say that although it was not like sitting in a Lazy Boy chair it was more comfortable that my plane ride last summer! This journey has been quite interesting! Although I am losing weight, I am losing from the top down. I have always been extremely hippy and continue to be. When I went to the doctor for my 6 month appointment, the nurse measured my hips and I have lost almost 10 inches from my hips. I thought the nurse was lying because when I look in the mirror, all I see is my hips that still are big. So I asked the nurse was she sure that I had lost that much. But she reassured me that the tape measure was not lying and neither was she! Now don't get me wrong I have struggled these past 6 months because I still hate eating! What an overrated experience! Eating 80 grams of protein for me is liking pulling teeth! My best friend is on my case on a daily basis reminding me to eat because honestly I am never hungry and have no desire to eat! But I know in order for me to lose more weight I have to eat!I had lunch yesterday with one of my dear friends and she asked me had I been faithful in my journaling of this journey and of course I had to be honest and say that I have sucked at chronicling this journey. She reminded me that if I don't journal the journey as part of the ministry that God has entrusted to me, I may forget what he has brought me through.
I know I have to do better because this has been such a God thing that only He can get the glory for! Lord, how many ways can I say thank you for doing for me what I could not do for myself?
4 months post op
May 26, 2009
Well it has been 4 months since my surgery and I am down almost 70 lbs! I am so glad to be able to utter those words. For so long I thought losing that much weight was near impossible but look at God!
Now don't get me wrong, this has been quite a struggle because I am still having issues eating and now I am having problems with vitamin defeciency. I have had several times where I have gotten light headed and nearly passed out. The last time was just yesterday when I decided to clean my house without eating first. Smart girl I am!
My doctor says that all of my vitamin levels are off as well as I am anemic and lacking protein. It is so hard to get down 70-80grams of protein a day but I know that if I don't eat I am going to feel like a zombie like I have been feeling for the past month.
Eating is such an overrated experience these days! But I am still glad I had the surgery and I can really tell the difference in my clothes. It is so much fun putting clothes on and them being too big!
I can't wait to hit the 100 mark! I am not sure what I am going to do to celebrate but know that EVERYONE will know when I lose 100lbs! I am going to shout it from the rooftop!
0 comments
Now don't get me wrong, this has been quite a struggle because I am still having issues eating and now I am having problems with vitamin defeciency. I have had several times where I have gotten light headed and nearly passed out. The last time was just yesterday when I decided to clean my house without eating first. Smart girl I am! My doctor says that all of my vitamin levels are off as well as I am anemic and lacking protein. It is so hard to get down 70-80grams of protein a day but I know that if I don't eat I am going to feel like a zombie like I have been feeling for the past month. Eating is such an overrated experience these days! But I am still glad I had the surgery and I can really tell the difference in my clothes. It is so much fun putting clothes on and them being too big! I can't wait to hit the 100 mark! I am not sure what I am going to do to celebrate but know that EVERYONE will know when I lose 100lbs! I am going to shout it from the rooftop!
It's been about 2 months since my surgery!
Mar 04, 2009
Well, I know everyone is wondering what has been going on since it has been quite awhile since I have written anything. But it has been a long, hard 2 months. I have had a lot of discouragement, a lot of times I questioned my decision to go through with the surgery and above all else lots of issues with the whole eating thing! I never thought in a million years I would have so many problems eating and keeping food down. 
To make matters worse, when I went to my 6 week doctor's appointment, I had only lost another 4 pounds because the doctor said I was not "eating enough". 
Imagine that! Me not eating enough! The past couple of weeks have been a little better but I still have many discouraged days. It's funny, because this has been the biggest mental battle of my life! One of the questions I asked my doctor and those in the weight loss support group is about counselors to help people through the mental and physical battle of surgery. I was surprised that there is really no one out there to help people deal with all the changes that go on mentally. So since I am always looking for a new side hustle, I decided that as part of my area of expertise in mental health, I am going to begin to market myself as a therapist for those after weight loss surgery! Who better to help people like myself recover not only mentally but emotionally and spiritually!
But I bless God for things getting better for me. I really can tell I am losing weight because some of my clothes are getting a little big! It's funny when even my clients (which are teenage girls!) tell me, "Ms. Erin, your pants is too big! You need to get some new ones!"
I tell you, out of the mouths of babes!
They keep me laughing! So I guess overall I can say, I have good days where I feel encouraged and believe that this all was worth it all. And then I have days where I just want to go eat a Blondie from Apple bee's because I am so discouraged! I want to thank everyone for all the prayers, well wishes and general concern. I am doing fine and am just trying to find who this new person under all the weight is as God reveals her little by little.
Thanks again! And I promise I will do better with the blog! Love you all!
2 comments
I have had a lot of discouragement, a lot of times I questioned my decision to go through with the surgery and above all else lots of issues with the whole eating thing! I never thought in a million years I would have so many problems eating and keeping food down. To make matters worse, when I went to my 6 week doctor's appointment, I had only lost another 4 pounds because the doctor said I was not "eating enough". Imagine that! Me not eating enough! The past couple of weeks have been a little better but I still have many discouraged days. It's funny, because this has been the biggest mental battle of my life! One of the questions I asked my doctor and those in the weight loss support group is about counselors to help people through the mental and physical battle of surgery. I was surprised that there is really no one out there to help people deal with all the changes that go on mentally. So since I am always looking for a new side hustle, I decided that as part of my area of expertise in mental health, I am going to begin to market myself as a therapist for those after weight loss surgery! Who better to help people like myself recover not only mentally but emotionally and spiritually! But I bless God for things getting better for me. I really can tell I am losing weight because some of my clothes are getting a little big! It's funny when even my clients (which are teenage girls!) tell me, "Ms. Erin, your pants is too big! You need to get some new ones!" I tell you, out of the mouths of babes!
They keep me laughing! So I guess overall I can say, I have good days where I feel encouraged and believe that this all was worth it all. And then I have days where I just want to go eat a Blondie from Apple bee's because I am so discouraged! I want to thank everyone for all the prayers, well wishes and general concern. I am doing fine and am just trying to find who this new person under all the weight is as God reveals her little by little. Thanks again! And I promise I will do better with the blog! Love you all!
2 Weeks Post Op-The worse is Over!
Jan 19, 2009
Well it seems like it has been an eternity since my last post but the last couple of weeks have been a little rough. I came through the surgery without any issues. My doctor decided during the surgery to perform the Sleeve procedure instead of the Rouen Y because I had a hernia and gastritis. The Sleeve was a less complicated procedure because they did not have to re-route any of my internal organs but the recovery has been difficult because it comes with soooo much nausea. 
I think in the last 14 days, I might have not been nauseated maybe 4 days of the 14. I ended up in the hospital a couple extra days because I was so sick. I couldn't even handle ice chips! It was really bad! Once I came home from the hospital things were a little better but I had trouble with the protein supplements and spent many days wanting to throw up. They were so gritty and that dang blasted fake sugary taste was more than I could handle.
I thank God for my mother who stayed with me for a little over a week. I think I almost drove her crazy because she wanted me to get all of my liquid supplements in every day but she could not understand why I kept wanting to hurl each and every day!
Today I went for my first post op appointment and I never have to eat the supplements ever again! Thank you Jesus!
Now I can have things such as potatoes, yogurt and even some veggies! I swear eating my first yogurt today was like eating prime rib! I also weighed for the first time today and I have lost 33 lbs in 4 weeks. You can't tell me God is not faithful! The last couple of weeks has all been worth it! I look forward to see how much more weight I lose in the upcoming months!
3 comments
I think in the last 14 days, I might have not been nauseated maybe 4 days of the 14. I ended up in the hospital a couple extra days because I was so sick. I couldn't even handle ice chips! It was really bad! Once I came home from the hospital things were a little better but I had trouble with the protein supplements and spent many days wanting to throw up. They were so gritty and that dang blasted fake sugary taste was more than I could handle. I thank God for my mother who stayed with me for a little over a week. I think I almost drove her crazy because she wanted me to get all of my liquid supplements in every day but she could not understand why I kept wanting to hurl each and every day! Today I went for my first post op appointment and I never have to eat the supplements ever again! Thank you Jesus!
Now I can have things such as potatoes, yogurt and even some veggies! I swear eating my first yogurt today was like eating prime rib! I also weighed for the first time today and I have lost 33 lbs in 4 weeks. You can't tell me God is not faithful! The last couple of weeks has all been worth it! I look forward to see how much more weight I lose in the upcoming months!
Today has been rough!
Dec 21, 2008
Today has been kinda rough emotionally.
I'm not sure why but I have been kinda depressed today. I just can't believe how dependent on food I have been for the past couple of years. I began to think when this happened and when I look back I can only think that it began when I moved away to Oklahoma in 2000 because that was the first time I was really alone. Now grant it I have always been big but when I moved to Oklahoma I realized just how alone I was. Then when I moved back home in 2002 I was ok again because I was living with my parents again but I think everything really went down hill when I moved back to Grand Rapids in 2005. I was really, really alone then because I was living by myself for the very first time and stressed beyond belief working on my second masters degree. It seems like the weight was packed on rapidly. I didn't think I was depressed but now that I look back on it, I was really depressed. This was not the depressed I felt when I was in college. This depressed was that of loneliness, anger, bitterness and inadequacy. So by the time I graduated last year with my masters and looked at my graduation pictures, I wanted to run in the corner and hide! How in the world had I allowed myself to get this big? As I look back now, all signs point to the fact that although I enjoy being by myself, I also very much being in the company of my loved ones, friends and family. It has also dawned on me that all of my life I have strived for excellence in everything; being the best daughter, sister, friend, student, minister, therapist, etc but I have failed at being an excellent ME!
It seems like Erin has never been good enough for Erin so along the way I buried the Erin that Erin didn't like under a whole lotta weight. So now as I stand at the cuspid of another year, I know that God in all his greatness and faith fullness is about to launch me into my destiny; a destiny that I have promised Him that I will strive to be the best Erin that I can be for Him and for me!
1 comment
I'm not sure why but I have been kinda depressed today. I just can't believe how dependent on food I have been for the past couple of years. I began to think when this happened and when I look back I can only think that it began when I moved away to Oklahoma in 2000 because that was the first time I was really alone. Now grant it I have always been big but when I moved to Oklahoma I realized just how alone I was. Then when I moved back home in 2002 I was ok again because I was living with my parents again but I think everything really went down hill when I moved back to Grand Rapids in 2005. I was really, really alone then because I was living by myself for the very first time and stressed beyond belief working on my second masters degree. It seems like the weight was packed on rapidly. I didn't think I was depressed but now that I look back on it, I was really depressed. This was not the depressed I felt when I was in college. This depressed was that of loneliness, anger, bitterness and inadequacy. So by the time I graduated last year with my masters and looked at my graduation pictures, I wanted to run in the corner and hide! How in the world had I allowed myself to get this big? As I look back now, all signs point to the fact that although I enjoy being by myself, I also very much being in the company of my loved ones, friends and family. It has also dawned on me that all of my life I have strived for excellence in everything; being the best daughter, sister, friend, student, minister, therapist, etc but I have failed at being an excellent ME! It seems like Erin has never been good enough for Erin so along the way I buried the Erin that Erin didn't like under a whole lotta weight. So now as I stand at the cuspid of another year, I know that God in all his greatness and faith fullness is about to launch me into my destiny; a destiny that I have promised Him that I will strive to be the best Erin that I can be for Him and for me!
Less than 2 weeks to go!
Dec 20, 2008
Well I started my pre-op diet today. It was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. I am eating pre-packaged food that I got from my doctors. It allows me 800 calories a day of all protein based food. It is supposed to help increase my tolerance for so much protein after surgery. Yesterday I went in for my pre-op appointment. It was pretty exciting! One thing I can say is that my doctor has made sure that I am well informed of everything that I am going to experience the day of the surgery and after. I continue to be soooooo excited! I know people are probably tired of hearing me talk about my level of excitement but I just can't help it! MY LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE!
I have waited for this for so long and finally it is fast approaching. I was driving home to Detroit today and all of a sudden I just broke out in praise to God. When I just think about the fact that this time last year the insurance coverage that I had would not even consider covering the surgery and now a year later I am less than 2 weeks away from the surgery. You can't tell me that God is not faithful! Over the pass couple of weeks I have tried to begin to wrap my mind around what life is going to be like when I am half of my current size. Although I am trying to prepare mentally, I know God is going to have to help with my mental transformation. One thing I noticed today as I was eating the pre-op food is that food is what I have turned to to comfort me and keep me company for a long time.
I am still trying to discover how this came to be so I am believing God that as the doctors are operating on me physically, Jesus operates mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I want God to completely make me over!
0 comments
I have waited for this for so long and finally it is fast approaching. I was driving home to Detroit today and all of a sudden I just broke out in praise to God. When I just think about the fact that this time last year the insurance coverage that I had would not even consider covering the surgery and now a year later I am less than 2 weeks away from the surgery. You can't tell me that God is not faithful! Over the pass couple of weeks I have tried to begin to wrap my mind around what life is going to be like when I am half of my current size. Although I am trying to prepare mentally, I know God is going to have to help with my mental transformation. One thing I noticed today as I was eating the pre-op food is that food is what I have turned to to comfort me and keep me company for a long time. I am still trying to discover how this came to be so I am believing God that as the doctors are operating on me physically, Jesus operates mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I want God to completely make me over!
I am trying to contain my excitement!
Dec 13, 2008
It dawned on me earlier today that my surgery is 3 weeks from yesterday. So many people keep asking me if I am nervous or scared. But I have no fears or anxieties. I am not sure if it is more normal to not be scared or normal to be as calm as I am now. 
Maybe I am not nervous or scared because I am in the best hands possible. I know that this surgery is the will of God for my life and I have waited along time and have researched and prepared myself for this season in my life. Someone asked me the other day if the decision to have the surgery was a one that I was making for me or for other people. It felt so good to be able to say that my decision to go through this was just for me. I am sooo ready to be able to feel comfortable in my own skin. To look in the mirror and like what I see; to be out somewhere with my very beautiful best friend and not feel like the ugly duckling! I am so ready to put on an outfit and know I look good! I can't wait to be able to preach or teach a sermon without getting tired. I can't wait to LIVE again! For the past 5-6 years I have felt like the real Erin has been trapped in a very big unattractive body! But I can't praise God enough! I can't give Him enough glory for God giving me another chance to live again! What a mighty God I serve! I am so excited I can't hardly hide it!
Bless God! I have a surgery date!
Dec 10, 2008
I finally have a surgery date! It is scheduled for January 2nd 2009! What a beautiful way to begin a new year! A new year that I will be healthier, have more energy and feel and look better! I am so excited and so gratful! Gratful that God favored me yet again! It is so amazing that God not only takes care of our needs but grants our heart's desires! I remember being in prayer right before Thanksgiving and God spoke to me and said that "2009 will be the year of His Appointed Time"! It would be the year that all of our hearts desires would be met not because it was in our timing but it would be in God's perfect appointed time. So after a 32 year battle to deal with being the "big girl" God has favored me to have the bariatric surgery in God's appointed time!
A new year that I will be healthier, have more energy and feel and look better! I am so excited and so gratful! Gratful that God favored me yet again! It is so amazing that God not only takes care of our needs but grants our heart's desires! I remember being in prayer right before Thanksgiving and God spoke to me and said that "2009 will be the year of His Appointed Time"! It would be the year that all of our hearts desires would be met not because it was in our timing but it would be in God's perfect appointed time. So after a 32 year battle to deal with being the "big girl" God has favored me to have the bariatric surgery in God's appointed time!
THANK GOD FOR INSURANCE APPROVAL!
Nov 29, 2008
I am so excited! I was on my way home to Detroit for the Thanksgiving Holiday and my doctor's office called to inform me that Priority Health has approved me for surgery. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to know that in just a few short weeks I will be having surgery. Finally I see an end to a lifetime battle of being overweight. I want to finally be called "beautiful" without hearing the infamous "if only you would lose weight" or the other infamous, "you have a beautiful (pretty) face". For once I just want to be called "beautiful" without the extra clauses. I am so gratful for God favoring me to get insurance approval first go around. I am going Monday for my last blood work and then my exact surgical date will be scheduled. God is so faithful to me!
About Me
Grand Rapids, MI
Location
66.2
BMI
Sep 21, 2008
Member Since
