Hi Kim :)
Rg your question about not seeing your weight loss and not having the confidence now that you did when you'd lost the same amount of weight on Phen-Fen, I can TOTALLY relate. I was just thinking this same thing yesterday as I was going through clothing (too big and too small).
I was on Phen-Fen for 7 months in 1997 and lost 80 lbs. Of course I gained it all back immediately after it went off the market it Sept 97. While I was on it, I felt VERY good, confident, etc. But I don't think it was the Phen-Fen altering my brain chemicals that made me feel that way because in 2000, I lost 125 lbs while on a 9 month liquid fast (HMR) and felt the same way.
I started out right before surgery at about the same weight that I was the other times (around 360), and even though I've already lost 84 lbs, I do not see myself at 283 lbs. Previously, when I'd gotten down to 280, I was feeling GOOD and my figure was looking a lot better than it is now.
I thought this was all in my head so I started trying on clothing that I used to be able to wear at 280, and sure enough, I am not fitting into them yet. For whatever reason, my body composition is different this time than it was in the past. Perhaps it is because of all of the drastic yo-yo dieting I did and loss of muscle along the way? Or perhaps it is simply because I am older (34 now) and my skin isn't bouncing back as well? And also, it is true what they say about gravity working. I am not sure.
Anyways, just wanted to let you know that you are not alone and that I can absolutely relate!!! :) Caroline (19 weeks post-op and -84 lbs)